itch.io

Pretty good! Liked the writing a bit more than the story, wish we got to see more of what Anna was like, her family, because it's brought up a couple times but we don't get a better idea as to how she was raised, her expectations.

The sprites are super charming, and the CGs are even more so. Raimondo pointing to his open mouth in disgust... it's too good. I'm gonna melt.

Overall the presentation is good, but there's one thing impossible to ignore; some of the backgrounds are in the day, but the story explicitly takes place at night. Maybe it was unavoidable. I don't know! It just looked off. The night is for crimes, like breaking and entering. Like smashing someone else's stuff.

The drama brewing, even early on is so compelling, I couldn't stop smiling. The theme, the folklore.. despite it being peppered throughout the novel the 'stay in the house until the end of the night' was abandoned... ultimately, because the story was more about character drama.

Enjoyed this very much!

At first I was really confused about the stars but then I'd become enamored - by the visual design, the music, and the voice acting. Unfortunately, the ambition is leaking through... I will say that I'd found one of you biggest inspirations (STP) about a month before the jam, and I recognized it well, but... the biggest joy in that novel is the sheer variety. For a game jam? It seemed like too little time. It was.

I'm really looking forward to the full release, but for the jam version, it's... alright. Just wish I knew more of Libulan by the end. Presentation's great, the folklore is intriguing... yeah, I really hope you finish this.

I know where this character design is from. I know. I won't say it but I know. I loved it. I loved knowing. He loved being a bad wolf...

It was a very pleasant reading, a renewal of Red Robbingsman and the Deadly-Dastardly Wolf, but they are not robbins or deadly-dastardly and instead they make baked goods.

The music was great, the little cgs near the end, of baking the pie - so charming! And Rossi, feeling so inadequate and learning to believe in himself, even with heartbreaking loss, it didn't leave much to be desired. Yes, I was well fed.

Presentation is good, art and cgs are really detailed. I'm not sure what was happening with the launcher but after getting it to work properly, I asked how much of a difference it actually made. 

The plot is basic, the theme (the folklore) is skimmed over... it left me wanting. Though you played to you strengths, I felt you could've had three or even two of the wolves instead - just focus on them a little more.

Overall, good. Just good. I missed the music dearly.

This is easily the funniest submission, you don't stop, seriously good collab, please do it again. That is, if it wasn't a nightmare to do. It's really effective.

Deconstructing that isekai genre is only right; there's already too much to learn living, and so little time. The dialogue is sincere despite how sarcastic it comes off at times. The theme is less pronounced than others but that's the only slight I'd give it. The presentation is fine, cause the deliberate clumsiness of the story, it makes it work!

Would recommend!

I really liked this one, and for the story it is one of the best entries. Some of the pacing is really slow, especially in the beginning, but it knows what it wants to say. Every character is well written, but as others pointed out, it has some anachronistic tendencies. But... doesn't everyone?

The visual style is very charming, backgrounds and characters alike.

...the pup comment at the end soothed my soul, I always hated that name. I actually jumped out of my chair with joy when I saw it. Good boy > pup.

The theme is plain as day, and constantly reinforced throughout the reading.

Overall, it was a very satisfying read! With Hyrax I had to read it again to really get it, but not this story. Really well done!

The presentation is good, but I felt the AA style UI a bit lacking, it's simply not fleshed out enough to feel as though it's necessary, and as a purely aesthetic decision... hey, it must've taken a while to do. There's no doubting that. It's just lite.

The theming is on point, never once did it have a chance to be forgotten, not even during sex.

The characters are charming, and so are the backgrounds. Speaking of... I thought Mac was the Jersey Devil for a while. Like, he looked like he was in disguise, and also the amount of exposition he gives seemed strange to me, I really thought... and then, the main characters 'need' the explanation after finding, yes, we did actually find the Jersey Devil, for real, in fact here is a picture. 

It felt like it sat on the windowsill for too long, the latter half of the story. The ending was a bit abrupt, and I wish there were more injuries.

It can still be lighthearted, even if you end up in the hospital.

For what is done, it shows promise in the story, but there are so many mistakes in the writing, it's hard to ignore. I'm talkin' proofreading, by the way; the writing falls apart towards the end, and so does the visual element. The music also ends up getting cut... regrettable.

The story is talking of a lotta serious subjects, but they all make sure to round out to the general idea of the novel, that of sin and cleansing the sins; and it stays consistent in this manner. Though, why does Solis disappear in Lillia's route? I don't know.

The art is pretty good, loved Solis' design very much, and Engil looks appropriately shifty.

Overall, I hope you come back and finish this. There's a lot of potential here, even if it seemed to be too much for a Jam entry to fit into 25k words, Engil has something to say too.

I didn't really vibe with this one. Not a fan of the prose, but the overall story is good. I loved how cold Valentina got towards the end. "It's not like any of their families are alive. It's the old west. People made shit up all the time."

I liked how pathetic the employee looked.

The characters are very round. Soft. It is a pretty soft story, though. The folklore was nice, but I wish they got a better look at the light.

The art is really intricate. Messy at times, but I really loved it... 

This man is taking a shovel and meeting the bed of rocks and digging a coffin and digging into the core of the sun. It starts out slow, sure... but it's someone who can't help themselves; contemplating exact things, perfect things... the little crease in their nose, and the pimple on their right cheek... things like that are quite annoying if you bring them up with anyone. It may seem small, but Tula loves the shovel. He likes the sound it makes.

The writing's great, the story is a little less good but the prose makes up for it. Music, especially in the beginning was great, too.

Tula, upon burning the caravan, really left an impression on me, and this was one of my favourites from the jam. Really well done.

Everything's very scary to review here. It's powerful. I'm gonna go blind if I look for too long. It has given life to this world...

Fundamentally fantastic VN, everyone is firing all cylinders, the presentation, story, audio design, accessibility, prose... it's all quality. I'm struggling to think of a slight it presented. Someone else mentioned that Ulfor should've died, and I can see why that makes sense, but the horrors of war are only so focused on. It's meant to be more character driven, and towards the end, I knew; 'Ulfor would have no purpose after the fighting is over, and even now he doubts himself for it, so... if he dies, it'll feel wrong. We already spent so much time with these characters, and less about the senselessness of war, so with that it mind...'

And now he sells flowers! And not fighting!

This story is scary. It felt like six people were standing atop a skyscraper and tracking me and everything I was doing while reading this, that's how good it was.

Even if it happens to be generic in structure, it's written well - the presentation, though, I thought was a bit lacking. The music is great, but the lack of expressions hurt...

The first half is lighthearted. Like going on a nice walk with too many limbs, so it takes longer. We get flashbacks, but I got a dark feeling. There were some other dark, humid feelings later in the half, but it made for a great lunch.

The second half is much more serious. Depending on how cowardly you are, you'll either get a terrible ending or a terrible ending or a terrible ending.

It's very real in contrast to the first half, and I greatly enjoyed it; real, grounded. The problem is that I got a dark feeling from the flashbacks, but it was only because I felt it being at all was doing that. If I didn't do that, it'd mean the first half wasn't setting it up... wait...

The two are at odds...

I loved reading this novel, but it wants to be pulled in both directions until it can go any farther. It's straining to love the earth.

I hope to see you again soon!

The writing is excellent, even if there are some formatting problems. The lack of SFX and music hurt... although, it isn't entirely barren of purpose either. It's like, when I heard this novel's music, it was like I was struggling to remember, to hold onto a song. I loved it without knowing why, eh? I loved even without the accuracy of why i loved... Yeah, the music is monotonous, but it fits really well. Presentation wasn't focused on, because of the very meditative state... it left me wanting.

Overall, I hope to remember this even after I lose my skin.

Your kid sucks. Hey, but I'm free. Take me. Take me to the store. We can get some pudding pops and large teas there. We should go. In fact should we go and stay there for much too long, as to be considered 'loitering'(i still think it's a fake term but whateverrrrr) and then we'll sneak into the underpaid employees house and have sex! We nutured a grudge against them, because they decided to be there at that unforunate time. We hated them, because they were unfortunate to be them at that one moment. And we could put all our powers into hating them, because we were father and son, and no matter how much hate we gave them, we had love in our life.

Liked the presentation. I like having a dad, and this novel has that. Also I agree with Fuse very much, you could've had the sex be nerdy. Ah, but the dad is lame, you say? Well, he can be nerdy, it's just not focused on so much. That could've been alright, too. The sex scenes were good! Ezra growing as a person was great! It was happy.

Oh, my favourite line in the novel was, "He hadn't thought this through, had he?" Palindrome.

I loved the faces every single time I looked I was smiling

The presentation was just okay, overall. The lack of music and SFX really hurts this novel, and I had to come back to it. When I decided to read all of the entries in one sitting, it was ending up being one of the most difficult.

Overall, it was a most grounded reading. Really authentic. I'm glad it doesn't explain itself too much.

I considered the ending to be particularly sad, actually. The main plot in the bookstore is pretty decent, even more with the Gandharva's (Aryaman) suggestion, but the cooking scenes I felt were half baked - just not enough time in the oven. It's been mentioned in other reviews, but making the food took more time than saying what it means, and I felt it could've been either more balanced, or just... longer.

Presentation is great, and the style is absolutely charming, the music's great and it's like a brother to me.

That last shot with Aryaman, leading to the end... I was sad. It felt like all his supernatural powers were abandoned, and all because he just had to be a human... wait, no...

Just wish it showed up again, after the first time.

Good work!

I fear that I am not smart enough to leave a review for this, but it is done, so...

This novel dives into depression and how you make people and entire places because you just can't bear it. The loss. The decay. Oh, the insults thrown Colin's way are severe, yes... but some of it seems to be right. Kurt isn't a bad guy, even if what he says is brutal. Because Colin really is to blame for at least some of this; his tendency to choose isolation persists until the very end. When all you get is mud in your face, it can be hard to look at anything... except, there was someone there. Someone who still believed...

And, even though Colin drowns and fucking dies... lol... ultimately, he still had hope. Even if it seemed like there were no other options, it's still a hope in the heart. Because what else is there to do? If I want to help myself I'm gonna do this... wait...

I think others have better analyses for this novel, but I really enjoyed reading. Presentation was great, too, and I've no doubt about that.

The presentation was great, but the writing left me wanting for more, just more. I'm hungry. When I got to the ending, I had to go to the fridge... and I ate, and ate. I read the nutrition label and thought about how much damage some of the ingredients could give me if taken independently.

The folklore is there, the audio design is alright. The title screen is beautiful... but I'm a thirsty little flower. I'm gonna die if you don't come back soon.

It's a difficult.

That is to say, I wish that there was more of the script, just, explaining of how and why everyone got here. The type of conversations, the depression... it seems to be lacking, here. Like it almost does enough. I desperately wished for it as I was reading, and I knew, and I felt the tears coming because it was ending. It was ending and we didn't get to the meat. We got a KFC Drumstick in 2026. The chickens are not as plump as they used to be. No food, is.

Although, the theme was followed very well.

...can I even say, like, the tagline is "A SMALL history of a couple" so I shouldn't - y'know it's fine. Mhm. I liked what was there. I just kept looking past it.

I liked.

Fuujin and Raijin? Well, this is my kinda place !

Along with the idea of not understanding anything, really loved the story beats, and Ryley running on fumes without our knowing so... if only Kameron was spelt with a C and not a K... that aside, from the moment I saw the conlang I knew that the VN was going to end up with a lot of 'white noise', but that's what you get with this type of story, it's only going to make sense later. ...still. It is what it is.

The presentation is great, and gets especially good towards the end! So many shots of fighting.

About the ending... I'm supposed to remember the title the entire time, but it slipped me so intially I thought it was out of left field, but it solidifies that love. The language of love, and love without language. Ryley loved Kameron more than anything. He loved him more than life. In fact did he make his heart rumble...

Overall, it was a pretty good read! You're strong!

The reading caused me to spiral into a depressive episode. I wrote about it, but instead I'll write about the novel.

The theme isn't always focused on, but there's something to be said about huffing the ashes of one. It's, like... if no one else can stand with you and breathe awfully, well, why are we even here?

Why am I even here, drooling over the warm nothing... Well, it's because... I don't think I have much else. Everything's just falling apart and I want to hold this little ember. You see it, right? Please say yes.

Never liked DnD. Always thought it was so fragile. Like I could see the ending from the moment it started, and that's definitely reflected in the writing. Every character can see it, even if they don't want it. That decay.

The presentation is stunning, and the little moments of grayscale when the immersion breaks is lovely, and real.

It's so real.

This was the funnest submission! Not the funniest, but it was much fun. Both this and another submission did the Ace Attorney style UI, and I felt it was used better here. 

...I mean, you're going through folklore directly and making it (partly) yours. It's the folklorest (folklore forest) of the submissions. Can I rate it 6 stars for theme? Both stories were compelling, too... the only slight I could think of was the ending, it seemed a little rough, but you added humour there too...ah, Homeka. I don't know why he stand like that but it's so charming.

Super super good.

Fine work! There could've been more worldbuilding, but hey. The fucking was hot. You wanted to make sure of this, and it was this. Lucius should've known better than to top, fucking id- no, I'm kidding. But Solus just comes off as a wet paper towel, and up until that point I really thought... ah, maybe next time. Before that though, we have to go to the moon!

Hope you come back for another jam!

Good pacing, great concept, it's hard to talk about without spoilers. It doesn't get bogged down, not by worldbuilding, not by character development... the reveal at the end makes such an impact, even if you could see it early on. So on point for the theme, too. The paper CGs are lovely. Keep it up!

The writing is fun, really knows what it wants to be. Love how absurd the setup is in the beginning, and the sword; there was this strange fountain pen penis I'd heard of before, but I never thought I could see it for real. It was a very charming read, and the ending was like a dream.

I felt as though I'd rushed through. I'm famished after having read it; the presentation is really great, but the details which are given are sparse and just... not focused on very much. Even if it's mostly a series of monologues, we don't see enough time of the relationships between the characters. We don't see enough time pass in-between, like this is not something you can force in a day or even a week, it's growing more than that. I didn't feel as though I'd enough context to understand as to why Rhett is so upset and how much time learning about someone else can take.

I loved all the endings. All of them are fair in their own right, even if you chew on regret for a long time.

There's a whole lotta nothin' down in the ocean. It's really scary, and also, pretty quiet most of the time. Well, that's another problem, because while the noises you can hear are not always hostile, they are most certainly warnings all the same.

The atmosphere and visual design of this novel are very good! The sound... now, I get that the atmosphere begs it, but I was fallin' asleep a bit without the music... ah, it's frustrating. Now, if I had a similar phone to what's shown in the novel, down deep in the ocean just so I could read this... there would be nothing wrong.

I wish it was definitively a wolf. But maybe, that's not something that can happen with this story. I mean, Otsoa... he has little reason to lie, right?

Really enjoyed this one. Loved the coldness of Otsoa towards the end.

Presentation's one of the best, seriously, even if the animation looks a bit sloppy, it's still clear in what it is presenting.

The two main characters have an. understanding. But it looks like the ending could've opened a bit more of their relationship together. Although I saw the ending cg and just felt the ending, maybe that's all you wanted to say and that's fine.

I'm a sucker for the folklore used here, and the timing it is introduced couldn't be better.

It's juicy. This novel is juicy. I loved it. Please read.

Good use of the colored dialogue, the NVL mode, and the liberal use of music is much appreciated. The framing, the blurriness in the beginning, doesn't feel so far from our world. It says it is a fantasy story, but... the wolf feels really human. And the actual humans are bad, and hate change, oh, I wish the wolf made more friends while he could be friendly. He's a bit of a loner, isn't he? Actually, everyone hated him. No one went to bat for him, as soon as the priest left... see, that dreadful feeling...

The dread at the end is very real and very important. I understand others saying that it is dragging on by that point, but it's something that sticks to your skin or even your second skin.

Overall, it was a very pleasant read.

The story was good, just thought it needed to be a bit longer. Expanded. Staple more rocks to the mountain. The presentation is average; scaling a mountain, and barely looking out over the vastness of the land? Disappointing.

Iseldur looks like he's going to scream, but he doesn't. It would've made some sense im just sayin...

The folklore theming is strong, but the writing is very loose with how it tells, switching pov often, in an odd order.

Hope to see you again for another jam!

I loved the overall story, the font is particularly great. The penguin of doom is no foe of mine, so I loved all the characters. Root was the one that seemed off, but ONLY at the end; they kept on being formal for the whole novel.

The dialogue is good, but it isn't right. For it to be set in an MMO, the characters talking as they do doesn't link up with what is actually real, even for people that are close to one another (you could even call them friends). It is not so verbose as you have written it even half the time. 

This sort of space still exists today, and it might look closer to what you've done with the writing; but for something like this... it just isn't... like this.

Presentation's great, and the sprites are on point with the era.

The ERP made me cry laughing. I had to get up. I couldn't see anything for a time. It was awesome.

Overall, this was a nice read!

I thought this submission was a little dangerous, especially in comparison to what you've already wrote. The presentation was great as usual, but the message...

It's very volatile, and I understood what you tried to say with this, but what actually happens in the story... how can I say it doesn't make sense? It feels like all of the werewolves tossed out their fear as they protested (which was already in vain seeing as the police literally drove through a group of werewolves)... why? Why did they do this. Why did they all trust this rando. Oh, because the leader agreed!... for some reason, even with years of knowledge of the persecution of werewolves, and rowdy enough to burn the confederate flag in front of everyone coming out of their homes; truly? I thought Zizi was acting a double agent.

The moon religion was cool, but it could've been expanded more. Honestly, if you leaned into that more as a righteous cause, I think it would've amplified the entire novel, seeing as the first scene starts in a church.

The father/son scenes were the best, even if they didn't involve werewolves too much ...hey, I'm lookin' forward to The Theatre.

I loved the cannibals. I'm not familiar with Blue Hour, so if I have an extensive review to give, OR if you continue this story (via another submission or update) it will be later.

Love the surrealism, the impatience of Lazarus. The stakes of the story appear to be graver, but the path of resistance is in a shambles. It was a bit disappointing, but also, our main characters are not warriors. They will not be doing the cutting down SO much, so we focus on their character and relationship more; and it delivers, not just with themselves but Butwiala and the cannibals, too. The ending threw me, but again, I don't know if it's based on Blue Hour or not - I swear I will go back and read it ! Would still recommend this story.

It was shorter than I antipated but I enjoyed the humour. Going to a bar, a place filled with sour things - but even without drinking one is already soured. That's because someone is right next to Wonder and every little movement and breath and word is loud.

I'm not left with the idea that he changed by the end of the novel, but some places, you need to actually go there enough times to be able to simply breathe in peace, and I thought a bar was one such place.

Loved the amount of drawn backgrounds and character sprites, the mushrooms. At some point the world jumping starts to feel old, and it was at that moment did I read, even the protagonist is cycling through all the worlds, until finding something that cannot die in a way that matters. Similarly, El (at least, one version of them) gains trust that can't be killed in a way that matters. Even if Kali leaves again, it's only a matter of time until they come back. Nice work!

This is the first submission I read!

This story had a great hook, and I liked the art (especially the colours) but I thought the narrative could've been expanded more. The bad ending is severe (good) but the good ending is severely lacking in resolution... how does Mary change? I would've loved to see that very much.

Really sorry about that. I've updated the pc version