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'Folklore Reclaimed' is a delightful little game experiment about reconstructing a story when all the tidbits are from so many different perspectives. The main game play loop is taking the two folklore stories, and comparing the different versions of them to point out contradictions, to hopefully come out with the 'correct' one. It's a neat concept that takes inspiration from games like Ace Attorney, and there's a surprising amount of breadth to the stories and how the reader can interchange the details of the text.

The story framing is that we're a college student doing research on old country folklore, and we are going to talk to an old man in a remote village. What little time we spend in this set up is just really well detailed and gives so much personality to Chayon, the elder, and just how much backstory the old man has and how much it shapes the way he speaks and responds to the suggestions from the 'official' stories. The stories themselves are this one about an inventor the mechanical body he builds for his late lover's soul, and the tale of two witches who need to be made to work together to solve an illness coursing through the village. What I appreciate is how Chayon's got a particular bias to the way he tells his stories, as they're full of progressive ideals such as same sex lovers, explicit depictions of sex, and happy endings, while official stories tended to lean towards erasing some of the mystical parts of the lore, like making the witches charlatans and instead relying on medicine and doctors, and then the archival texted which heavily referenced a lot of divine intervention from the gods themselves. Eventually, you either change too much and the old man kicks you out in anger, you change too little and he sends you off, or push back just the right amount to run into a hot wolf guy before going to the lounge.

I've used the word delightful, and I think that encapsulates how I felt playing this game. The bright music, the pleasant setting and the low stakes just make this a cozy game to see how much you can play around with the story structure. It's kinda crazy coding all the replacement story stuff as well as making the whole "replace text scene" work, so I was surprised at how well it ran. The writing, with it's surprising depth, was particularly simple in the end. I did get a few good chuckles from how horny you can make the stories, but once you get beyond the initial amusement, there's not much more to explore with the story, as it ends after two folktales.

The folklore element is front and center, as it grapples with the whole concept of passing down stories from your old country, and how sometimes those stories can get twisted by cultural shifts, or can be lost to time or bad memory. Still, it's worth preserving and remembering those as best as possible. The creativity is always fun to see with actually getting custom folk lore tales, with different details coming in and out, and letting the reader pick them out, looking for those contradictions.

It's always fun looking forward to an FdRstar production, cause they always remember the 'interactive game play' element of a visual novel, either devising a maze game, mini puzzle games, or in this case, a contradiction finder game. As a result, the amount of enjoyment you derive is based on how good you are at grasping what you're supposed to do, and the reward at the end. There's no crazy secret ending, just a couple of cute endings, which I appreciate not trying to figure out what the 'right' solutions are. It would go against the theme of the game if the was a 'right answer'. Plus, the narratives for his games are always interesting, since there's so much thought and world building put into them. I love the proof of concept approach to the game jam, and it's always neat to see what kind of stories can be told interspersed with game play. Part of me wants to see what kind of experience could be carried with more focus the narrative, but also, I wouldn't want to take the love for putting in game play elements away from them. It really is such a difficult balance.

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'A Werewolf in Charleston' is a political thriller/horror contemporary tale that takes the concept of the werewolf myth and turns it into a political allegory, with some slight morbid pornography for just a pinch of shock value. By virtue of being a very self-proclaimed political commentary tale, there is a lot of explicit and implicit imagery and concepts that this story is dealing with: religion, conditional love from family, political violence, propaganda, LGBTQ+ rights, personal identity, radicalization, cult-like indoctrination, self-harm, and gay sex. There are aspects of this story that I think were handled well and really got right, and other parts that I think were pretty weak in their conceptualization and were put in just to really hammer in more of the political posturing, and some parts that felt were inserted into this just because it's a My Wolf genre of visual novel.

To talk about the story, is to look beyond what is simply presented, because even in the case of what it explicitly states, there's a lot of devil in the details, and when trying to make a political message, delivery of the message kind of matters, or else it just turns into propaganda. To start out, You have Andy, who is the son of a church pastor, and on his 21st birthday, he transforms into a werewolf. In this universe, werewolves are a known thing, except that it's legally okay to kill and lynch them, because of reasons. Anyway, upon Andy's first transformation, he runs away in fear of being killed and lynched, and luckily runs into Luis, another werewolf, who then takes him to 'the Den' where there are a bunch of other werewolves. They give him the low down, and the rules are: 1) You didn't get a choice in being a werewolf. 2) Human during day, werewolf at night, except sometimes werewolf in day because it makes for a good plot point. 3) During the lunar eclipse, you need to swap body fluids with another werewolf to stay a werewolf forever. 4) Is entirely your choice to become a werewolf forever. 5) If you don't turn into a werewolf forever, you instead become a horrid amalgamation of a werewolf monster. 6) It's totally your choice. 7) If you don't become a werewolf forever, you better kill yourself or the werewolves will kill you. 8) Did I mention, it's totally your choice. Anyway, after some more waffling about, where Oliver has a scare of possibly being outed as a werewolf, seeing werewolves be hung in the center plaza, having sex with Luis, a protest march that ends violently and several werewolves and cops dead, and then a club shooting (where Oliver wracks up a body count of 3). Turns out that pastor dad was a werewolf this whole time, but the kind that didn't swap fluids and now he's a horrible amalgamation, of which he tries to kill Oliver/Andy, but then Oliver/Andy just kills him instead and eats his heart. Very Oedipus. And uh, that's it.

Okay, I don't normally do this, but I'm going to write down all my retorts and comments I had about this story, because it's very front and center, I think the story is inviting it, and I need to write this down:

> Oh, good, we're immediately transforming into a werewolf, no need for a bunch of will I/won't I to get to the issue.

> I think that werewolf is metaphor for homosexuality, but then it gets a bit conflated with transgender identity, and then also with just general non-socially accepted taboos like drinking and other taboo vices, so it gets really muddled for me.

> Despite it's intention as taboo, the story werewolves also have a code of ethics, that include consent and making sure that sex is between consenting adults over the age of 21. I just think it's a bit undermining of the message when the vagueness of werewolf parallels suddenly also have a purity angle.

> I notice that this story goes from a critique on Christianity, then suddenly shifting to a completely new religion, except that this one is apparently the true one with the moon goddess. Swapping one religion for another, thus, weakening the message against blind adherence to a religion without proper reflection on the religion itself.

> Awfully convenient that the next lunar eclipse is in a month. I get it's for story purposes, but it's just such a plot convenience that adds on a countdown clock as well as inducing fomo in Oliver, who if it wasn't clear before, is clearly being coerced into being a werewolf fully. (I thought we cared about consent?)

> Just how old is Luis anyway? I gather at minimum 26 since his boyfriend died at least 5 years ago, but this detail is glanced over.

> Don't get me started on the whole "We never tell anyone our human identities." Which is like, totally groomer behavior and the craziest red-flags about an organization that he's forced into. Doesn't even make logical sense, unless they were in-fact, doing some crazy shady stuff.

> Oliver/Andy is very one dimensional. He has no real point of view, aside from just "being a good boy". Can't really articulate any meaningful thoughts, and yet is blamed for like, everything. Even at the end, a lot of his actions are forced by circumstance, so it never feels like he shows any agency.

> Luis is just as bad. For someone who's been in Oliver's shoes, he has very little empathy for him and expects him to have an emotional maturity greater than he ever shows. Talk about avoiding accountability.

> Zizi is pretty terrible as a group leader, for letting Oliver lead the protest, and then straight up murdering a cop. She also is the least helpful and least informed wolf, despite being portrayed as someone who should know better?

> Randolph Crane is like the best character, if only because his views and motivations are very well established, and he is the perfect character for delivering the message of "If you don't create a safe space, how do you expect to be trusted by your children," for parents. That being said, it's still very weird that he just carries a switchblade and expects his son to straight up put a wolf out of it's misery. (I get that it was foreshadowing, doesn't make it feel less like it comes out of nowhere though.) 

> Why is the Moon Goddess a thing? Like, talk about bring in way too many existential questions, undermining the nature of religion being based on belief, and taking away even more of Oliver's agency. Never explained, never justified, just blindly obeyed because I say so.

> I know that the self-mutilation of cutting of the finger is supposed to be shown as like, denying yourself for safety purposes, but also, Andy absolutely did the right thing in that situational moment. His instincts were entirely right about how that company would have immediately just killed him on the spot.

> I know Luis was making a point about how humans kill for sport to paint them as evil, but technically other animals do that too (I'm 'um actually'-ing).

> The chemistry between Oliver and Luis is so forced. Like, it's jarring how quickly those two go from weary/distrustful of each other to having sex on a boat in the middle of a lake. And then even after all the murder, still going to have sex.

> This is apparently the first time that Oliver has seen the werewolf bodies be hung in public, and it's like you'd think that would be on the news or something. Quite a way for Luis to put Oliver in a dangerous situation, and then, have Oliver kill someone to save Luis's life. Masterful plan.

> I just kept writing 'melodrama' over and over in my notes as I was reading. No one has a proper talk, they just talk political points to each other.

> I put a note that the boat sex scene was unintentionally funny with the way Oliver looked down at Luis.

> I have to question the logic of Oliver who saw cars willingly mow down werewolves, as if doing a public protest wasn't about to also result in blatant murder.

> I was surprised that it wasn't a massacre with how many times they've just been shot at for just existing.

> Radicalization of one of Andy's friends who was told the location of the Den, which apparently Randolph knew the whole time? Feels a bit plot-hole-y just to have a club shooting scene for dramatic effect.

> Oliver having a higher body count should really count for a lot more, considering how blasé the rest of the werewolves are.

> Do we ever even meet a werewolf that fully became one? We never even examine how drastically might change someone's life. We really are just going all in on assumptions aren't we?

The presentation of this visual novel is extremely well done. The striking typography, the stylized background shades, even the character designs have all been vastly improved since the last few visual novels that Corvus productions has done. Not that previous entries weren't good, but you can see the steady increase in production quality, from extensive use of sound effects for immersion, and the art is just improving too. I made a joke about the sex scene being unintentionally funny, but as a CG, it was also really hot as the scene went on. Monster design is really good, and I enjoyed even the gore-y bits. Maybe it's cause the style isn't as hyper-realistic, so I can stomach it a bit better. The writing definitely has a point of view, and that view is to go on rants. I do wish there was a bit more introspection done by all the characters, as it feels very surface values despite the werewolf motif supposed to being a metaphor thing. It's weird because I don't disagree with the message the story is trying to portray, but it doesn't plot doesn't really allude to why being a werewolf shouldn't be something to be condemned for. The main message I get is "being a werewolf sucks, being a person sucks, because of other people".  I feel like the point of this story is meant as a warning to loved ones who might push away their loved ones by the way that they don't make them feel safe, yet this isn't the type of story that would reach those people. As a result, it feels propagandist in favor of leaving your family behind and fully embracing a new but unknown culture without question.

The folklore aspect makes sense, can't go wrong with the classic southern gothic horror and a werewolf motif. Maybe a deeper explanation into the moon goddess allegory could've helped it feel like it's own timeless version of the world, but as it is, it feels like a weird amalgamation of many different time periods, yet belonging to none of them. It is a fun interpretation of the werewolf myth, where it's more of a parasitic entity within you that waits patently until your 21st birthday to make you a monster that humans want to kill, but you also get the added benefit of having sex with other hot werewolves. I'm actually surprised how little homophobia was mentioned by the church goers, I guess werewolves are a much easier target to hate. That might've been funny to have homosexuality be accepted and not were-wolfism, but we know that according to the Den, it's all still taboo. I think I've gone on too much of a rant myself.

Anyway, overall this is an excellent presentation by Rhetto, who has clearly found his voice and niche about infusing his outspoken activism into a bunch of classic horror plots. I think in this case, there was a heavy handed amount of political commentary frosting topped on top of this werewolf body-horror/romance cake. If I scrape off a lot of this frosting, I find a cake that I really enjoyed. The whole father/son plot line layer was really relatable and emotional. The wolf romance layer with Oliver and Luis was super hot and I was into it. The graphic body horror layer was also really shocking and grotesque. It's just somehow in combining these cake layers, you've added so much of this political frosting holding it together, I get a mouthful of frosting and barely any cake. (Does this metaphor make sense?) Like, I get what this was going for, but wow do I feel like there needed to be some edits being made here. Honing in on the core theme/message of the story, and whether each element is going to either help reinforce that message, or help develop characters, or help develop the world. Then again, if you weren't trying to be subtle, you definitely achieved it.

'For the Black Hour' is another crazy drug trip of a story by the team over at Strawberry Noodles. We've got the trifecta of Strawberry Noodle story traits: a surrealist world with unusual rules and a bunch of magic that I think is supposed to be symbolic, a buddy-trip plot where we get two characters going on a journey to get somewhere and 'do the thing', and those two buddies being weary and distrustful of each other and coming to find that they like each other more than they realize when it turns out they've just been putting up a front. The aesthetic this time? Oppressive light and cult like activities, ala Midsommar.

The story plot is always a crazy ride, this time being a Szeptucha (medicine/magic man from what I could research) and a forest spirit go on a journey to bring night back to the world after it has been placed in eternal day time. Along the way, they meet a couple of cannibals that eat gods, the knights that defend the sun and want to stop them from taking it out of the sky, a village that is filled with burning villagers trying to escape the eternal day, the witch that seems to have something to do with it, and eventually the Bell Tower of the celestial moth that is able to finally put the moon back into the sky. Along the way, the szeptucha and forest spirits learn to like each other, turns out the szeptucha was depressed cause he didn't feel authentically loved, but he got over it because that's just who he is and a god of death told him so. Also, the forest spirit felt like he betrayed the forest that he couldn't protect, turns out the forest did forgive the wolf, so happy ending I think. The plots for these stories are always just fun vivid set ups and funny banter between sad complicated characters, and this gives a lot more of that.

The presentation is top notch, with the art stylization just being really something different and hauntingly beautiful, also a staple of the art team. They really enjoy their body horror painted beautifully, though not as much this time as some of their previous works, leaving more to the writing prose to describe it. The audio work is also really good, though I will say I don't know if I fully understood the purpose of the jump scare scream at the start and end, because this isn't quite as horror story as it feels like it's trying to come across as. The prose as always is a little bit rough, but that comes with the territory of being translated from Polish, but even so, it does a good enough job to get the emotions and feeling the characters have, as well as give them some distinct personalities. I really liked the shift in Lazarus as he slowly gets back his memories, really well described the process of a character acting out on pure emotion, and then realize who he actually is and those emotions are given context. The weakest bit is probably the resolution, as it seemed to resolve without much issue, and aside from meeting a couple of knights, there wasn't any kind of character growth moment, since both characters are already good boys. I wonder if the writer just really needed to wrap up the story for time, so just did it as well as they could. Would've enjoyed a bit of a moment between Lazarus and Cyril, just so they could say that they've grown closer, but I'm not mad it's not there.

The folklore aspect is cleverly woven into the narrative. One, it's got (I think) Slavic folklore-ish traditions being the basis of the story, and then the little Easter egg at the end of the story where it turns out this whole visual novel was a story being told by last year's may-wolf characters. I really liked that call back, and giving a bit of continuity to this crazy story universe. Of course, the creativity is always off the chart with Strawberry Noodles, never knowing what set pieces and imagery is going to come across the screen next. Cannibals eating a corpse with flowers growing out of it, a village on fire with folks playing music, a galaxy moth in a cave, just fever dream at that point. I will say, something about these stories is that I could usually find some kind of symbolism or meta-narrative that might be going on, but I don't think I could decipher one while I was reading it. I had thought by the description it might've been something like a toxic positivity with the eternal day, maybe something about environmentalism and burnout culture with the burning village, or something about self-love and self-sacrifice? If there was one, I wasn't able to pick up on it, but then again, I could just be reading too much and it's just a fun campfire story being told by a kitty and a wolf.

Always an interesting read from Strawberry Noodles. You do need to go in ready to brace yourself for some kind of obtuse storytelling, but it's a fun ride if you let it play out. I wouldn't want to take away from their signature style of being confusing to comprehend, but I'm always fascinated by how much I come to enjoy and root for the pair to get together, so maybe giving a bit of payoff wouldn't hurt for making it to the end. So glad that they've become established enough that they have their own team logo splash they can put on their projects, so leaves me looking forward to what prompt will get them going the next time.

'Her Old Recipes' is a cozy slice-of-life drama kind of story about using baking to deal with grief with a magical twist. The visual novel is cute, a little bit messy, and bursting with personality. It takes what would normally be a grounded in reality story and adds enough magical elements to make it feel almost fairy tale-ish, which I think is also on purpose for what I think was the main folklore inspiration for this piece.

The story follows a young male witch who creates an amalgamation in the shape of a wolf. This construct was made with the express purpose of being fed some recipes (cause it can learn by eating printed paper), so it can help him run his bakery. Though the slice-of-life day with the witch, the wolf slowly learns with the reader the situation with the witch, how the bakery was owned by his grandmother, how said grandmother has died, and the strain on the witch from his mother and himself is what caused him to make the wolf in the first place. In trying to keep her alive, he's just trying to recreate everything she did but just perfectly, which he's been struggling with. Eventually with the help of a lumberjack friend and the wolf, they work through the witch's grief and start living as the grandmother would've wanted him to continue living. The characters are all really well written, each one feeling distinct from the other. The witch being a sad boy, the wolf being a innocent good boy, the lumberjack being a wise friend and his mother being a complicated and angry woman.

The presentation is so good. Like, the first thing that stands out is just how much style and artistic flair this game has. From the UI, to the way the sprites are drawn, to the character designs themselves, very few noticeable hiccups (the only one would be doing mirroring of the sprites, and thus changing up the asymmetrical details). The music is mood setting. The way that the storytelling style changes from standard visual novel to storybook cgs is adorable and just really good in the immersion category. Even the filtered photos make it feel fantastical and not like it's weirdly out of place. There's an aesthetic language that's is so consistent that it's one of my favorites in the jam so far. Writing wise, it could use a couple more pass through for technical stuff like certain words and tenses. However, structure-wise, I felt like it kept going at a nice pace, revealing details and plot points as they became more important. It does get a little bit soap-opera-y and melodramatic when the familial element comes in, making it feel like there's a bit too much trying to pile on, and leaving a sort of unresolved plot thread with his mother, that I felt could've been explored more, other than trying to just paint her as an antagonistic force that doesn't get addressed again.

The folklore element I think is Little Red Riding Hood, and using that as a structural starting point for the character set up is really cute. Especially the "Big Bad Wolf" eating granny's recipes is just a fun interpretation and twist on the classic tale. I thought the setting and the designs were super creative, and the characters were really endearing. I think Russo (the witch) had a simple character arc, going from sad boy to hopeful boy, thanks to the construct that he made. It's simple, but in a good way, giving the feel good cozy vibes and a bit of overcoming grief narrative plot line that warms the heart.

So surprised that this was a first time entry by the author and artist, cause this is just fantastic. The presentation is extremely polished, the art is cute, and the story is also something that just works extremely well for a game jam like this. Like, good judge of keeping the scope in check. It sets out what it wants to do, and executes it. Do I wish that there was a little bit more of a plot happening and there was a bit more deliberate actions being made, sure. Especially with Bonet (the wolf) being super perfect and helpful, a lot of the conflict ends up being existential. But, I get the feeling that this is the story that wanted to be told, and it was told extremely well. Looking forward to so many more projects you decide to cook up.

'Death and the Thief of Stars' is a furry visual novel retelling of a Filipino myth of the source of the stars in the night sky. Always fun when these folklore entries bring me to do outside research about validity of myths vs cultural impact vs purpose of myths, none of which are suited to be discussed here. Instead, this is a story about the role of fate and design, how Gods are often portrayed with surprisingly mortal vices, and the value of balancing the desires of the individual over the desires of the masses.

This is a story about Gods, the god of the moon Libulan, who steals away the stars (that are only visible during the day) from his brother Liadlao, god of the sun, and hides out on the mountain belonging to the god of death, Sidapa. Sidapa starts by speaking on behalf of Libulan to Liadlao, as he is a neutral party who does not care whether stars are in the day sky or night sky. Liadlao reasons that the stars were not Libulan's to take and that by taking them from the day sky would throw the heaven's out of balance for mortals use the stars to divine the future and their locations on the surface of the Earth. Libulan retorts that they are lonely in the night sky and requires the stars so that they can feel beautiful and be seen at night. Sidapa ultimately agrees with Liadlao (in this build) because Libulan is in the wrong no matter how justified their motivations may appear, both in that the stars are not theirs to take and it would cause terrible consequences. As a result, Libulan's wolf form becomes a pig and they fall into a depression and fade while Sidapa gets to be all flirty with Liadlao painting stars in the day sky. We are told this is the bad-wrong ending as another god comes along to tell us that we made the wrong choices, and that they will send us back in time to make the right choices. The good-right route does not exist at this present time.

The presentation is fantastic, with really appealing art sprites of the characters, excellent audio direction and even fully voice acted dialog! There is a lot of effort that had been put into the visual and audio experience, that it feels like watching an independent short film. The visual novel medium is used to a great extent to show all the [exploration] options for more info, or just [response] options to move the story along. I will criticize how it's frustrating re-reading through the story expecting to be able to obtain the good-right ending, that was greyed out, only to find that the option isn't available yet (perhaps not show the option exists?). The writing is quite well done, and reads like a reading an ancient folklore myth, and each of the characters really stand out in their own ways. I will say that I felt the voice acting was a bit too slow for my liking, and about halfway I ended up muting it so I could read through the mundane parts a bit faster. It was interesting that the splash screen warned against this being a dating sim, which feels a bit confusing towards thinking there was no romantic elements in the story, when it also feels like romance does play a heavy role in motivation for the characters, so being a bit more specific in saying there aren't any explicit scene would better convey the nature of the story.

The folklore aspect is front and center, being a re-interpretation of this myth with anthropomorphic furry species. That being said, I'm left wondering how effective it was even as a way to convey why Sidapa would willingly let Libulan steal away the stars for the night. Maybe it's because the current story route does too good a job in portraying Libulan as a spoiled twink with self-esteem issues, and makes Sidapa and Liadlao as the reasonable level-headed guys. Especially with the epilogue straight up telling the reader that "this is not how the story should go, go back and redo it". I take it that this would be better fleshed out in future updates, but for the current build, I think I'm supposed to feel sympathy towards Libulan that doesn't just come across as trying to be manipulative. As if, the only reason I'm supposed to side with Libulan, is because I know that stars show up in the night sky. Granted, that just might also be the original myth. Anyway, I thought this entry was really creative with it's presentation and the way it handled dialog choices.

It's kinda crazy just how good this game is put together for what looks like a first time writer/manager, especially with the help of so many contributors. What looks like several character and background artists, coders, voice actors, editors, and musician. Time management and team management are both hard learned skills, so being able to collaborate with so many is impressive. Scope seems to have outgrown the confines of the jam, so it's a bit unfortunate that we only get what is written to judge the game off of. It's hard to say if there's any critique towards the re-interpretation of the myth story itself, since you have to adhere to the general pre-established narrative, but maybe this visual novel is limited by the source material. Stray too and doing your own thing loses the connection to the myth, staying too close means it's hard to see what spin or new input is given to the story. Funny enough, if you had just left the visual novel as is, where the stars don't get put into the night sky, then it might even be considered a subversion of the expected myth. Perhaps a re-interpretation of what the dark night sky meant, less as a "I'm stealing the stars so I can be beautiful" and more of "I'm embracing my existing beauty, which lifts the dark veil of my jealousy and that reveals the stars," or something with a modern emotionally healthy twist to the myth. Still, great job, and gratz to a strong first showing.

'Outer And Inner Before I Became You, You Became Me' is an existential story about stories. It tries to grapple with the paradox of how important stories can be to preserving memories and teaching lessons, but also how in crafting those stories, the actual people that those stories may be about become distorted and can be lost in the story itself. To craft a story is to file away all the unimportant details that makes a person a person, and crafts them into a character. In doing so, the character is no-longer a person and if that is the case, could a story truly ever capture the memory of what makes a person whole? It presents that people are merely stories crafted by others to identify them, so if there is no one around to tell your story, do you actually exist? Much is the mystery of conscience.

The story actually presented in this visual novel is actually a few layers deep. You have the personal story of the POV main character, a man wracked with grief after losing his mother to Alzheimer's and grappling with the complex emotions of seeing her forget him as a person, thus giving him a little bit of an existential identity crisis. He wanders into the woods where he meets a wolfman. Said wolfman, Cael, is infected by a parasite called FOLKLORE, that exists within the fragments of his mind and is slowly overwriting his thoughts to only be able to tell the story that FOLKLORE is, as if the story itself were a virus strain. I think that the story is actually three stories: the flowers and the bells, the reflective lake, and the threshold seller. Depending on the choices you make and the questions you ask, determine the outcome of the wolf, where you become the new story host, where you let the wolf be consumed by the story, one where you and the wolf share the burden, and I think a secret ending where the story becomes self aware and the parasite stops being infectious (these are my musings, so I might be wrong about the interpretation). I think what the story is trying to go for, is this sort of meta-narrative about stories, and trying to convey to the reader that they are now infected as well with this story.

The presentation is minimal and very much dependent on how susceptible the reader is to 'creepy-pasta'. There's only a few backgrounds and only a silhouette of a wolf sprite, leaving a lot of the visual detail of a visual novel to be left to the text. There is some really cool choices being made in how the menu is minimal and incorporates into the meta-narrative, with menu options like 'listen' and 'leave', very thematically poignant. The shifts from chapter to chapter interspersed with famous quotes from literary works was an interesting touch, trying to indicate which route you were on. Even small details like being unable to skip the 'stories' as they came up, having to click through them, if you've re-read the novel, even a special line if you replay the story to get a different ending, or the title screen change if you find the hidden ending, are fun ways to utilize the medium. That being said, it's a very hard sell in terms of appeal and flair, either on purpose or by lack of effort into it.

As such, a lot of the responsibility falls onto the writing quality itself. It's kind of crazy that this is, I believe, Chinese translated into English, because the prose is very purple and very descriptive. It waxes on about every little detail, while also not really saying anything. Obtuse, would be a way to describe it. It really begs the reader to work at what this story is trying to say, and tackle larger concepts than I think this medium is capable of doing. It almost borders on pretentious. The few times that it gets grounded in reality are nice, otherwise it seems to be about tirades of philosophical concepts that start to lose their impact, the more you realize that there's not really a conclusion that the story is going to be able to reach. It's one of those ambiguous endings, choose your own meaning, type of deals. I don't hate that it does that, and I appreciate the little Easter eggs in the game files for some meta-narrative and backstory, but for as much effort that I put into trying to understand it, left me unsatisfied with the 'prize' at the end.

From a folklore perspective, I get that this was a story about stories, but kind of misses the point of what folklore is. Folklore leans more into a communal and shared story tradition, while this visual novel prefers to focus on how stories are crafted by individuals, in order to 'infect' others with that story. The stories kind of touch on the folklore aspect, with the reflective lake being the most folklore-y of the bunch. I will say this is a strangely creative narrative, and I love the techniques used to make the meta-narrative.

This is a really high concept type of visual novel, and with that comes a lot of risk of it either going over people's heads, or it ending up verbose and exhaustive to read. Unfortunately, as cool as a concept as this seems to be, I don't know if the execution and final product is compelling enough to over come how not invested I was in the characters, outside of my initial curiosity. Funny enough, I wonder if the visual novel is aware of this, as the hidden ending seemed to have the nailed on the head, that one should be interested in the person behind the stories just as much as the story itself. I wanted to feel invested in the characters, but there's hardly anything to latch onto. I understand that its the point, but even so, it would be nice to get some resolution to that. I guess because there are options, it gives the illusion that there's a good path and a bad path, but ultimately, it feels like it's all the same path. That being said, it's really interesting getting a perspective from a Chinese background that I haven't read much from, and I wonder if that's reflective of this author's style of writing, or that's just how Chinese stories feel. 

'Second Chance' is your standard isekai/'died and born in another world' kinda story. It's very straight forward in how it sets itself up, and I don't hate how non-descript and generic it comes off. In a way, it has it's own stylization to it that makes it very easy to understand visually what is going on. I should also point out that this entry was completed in seven days, so while that doesn't look good for time management aspect, it's still impressive what could be put together in such a short amount of time.

The story itself is only the introduction and the first scene of what would be a larger visual novel story. The first scene is a black void scene where [insert character name here] has gone and drowned himself because of non-descript personal issues that made him give up on life. He's approached by the "God of Curses" in the void, and gets reborn/re-materialized as a dog person in this new world of magic. Fun to have the human to furry wish fulfillment happen right off the bat. He wakes up to a very shirtless wolf who has found him in the forest and tells him of his quest to gather the four non-descript heroes of the non-descript prophecy so they can take down the non-descript evil brother of the benevolent king after the non-descript prince had gone missing. They talk a little bit, and then you fall asleep. I joke about the non-descript stuff, since it sort of evolves into it's own style the more it's used, color coordination for magic styles, and what not.

The presentation I think is serviceable. There's some really strong direction with the bold symbols in the void, the bright saturated magic colors, and even the character designs being simple but distinct. The music works well enough, and there's a lot of text timing to add impact while reading. The writing does need a lot of help though. Plenty of typos, awkward grammar from mixing of the tenses in words, and some weird sentence structures. I wonder if this might be an ESL thing or just no time for proofreading, so I can understand that element.

The folklore aspect in this entry is represented by the generic prophecy that is the main plot thread in the story, and I guess it serves it's function to give the wolf character a reason to go on this journey. The bits that really made me like this entry were the little self-aware jokes, that could almost have this function as a parody, if I knew it wasn't trying to be a parody, it was one of those 'look to the camera tell joke' moments. "Ah... you're finally awake." being a recognizable meme and the out of left field "want to see my dick?" and "what is this a furry visual novel?" give this visual novel a weird charm to it that is a breath of fresh air from trying to take itself too seriously. That being said, it is just another isekai that doesn't seem to be trying anything particularly different, almost paint by numbers.

I would say that what this visual novel needs is direction, because it's hard to gauge just how serious you want this visual novel to be. If you're going the route of making it more serious and straight-forward, it's going to need a lot of outlining and a lot of internal consistency. Stuff like figuring out the main character's motivation. He's getting a second chance, at what? To lead a regular life? To feel like he's doing something good? To make up for a mistake in his past? Why would he go on this seemingly dangerous journey in a new world with this wolf to fulfill a prophecy he has no investment in? These are questions that you'll have to think about as you continue to develop this story. If you want to go the comedy and parody route, you'd also need to have internally consistent lore. Just how aware is the main guy of isekai and visual novel tropes? Does he know he's in an isekai? Just how ridiculous are you going to make the characters?  

Overall, I noticed that his is a first time build for this author, and honestly, I love the gumption. It's got a strong bold art style to it, and there's potential for it to grow, but that's what's there, potential. It's a bit hard for me to praise what hasn't been made yet. Another thing I would try to work on is time management, goal setting and establishing scope. A big pitfall of VNs is having too lofty and grand an idea that it either never gets made, or remains in an unfinished state. Set a time limit and a goal for doing updates or chapters. If it takes you a week to do this intro, try to set a goal of one to two months to finish the first chapter which will get the characters to the village and meet the healer. Outline how many major 'things' should happen for your story. Figure out what characters should show up when and where, design the characters, design the villains, come up with a cool conflict. That's really all the fun of making these, and I hope that you continue to have fun making it.

'The Cloud Messenger's Feast' is a meet-cute romance story with a bit of slice-of-life fun with running a bookstore. Of the entries that have been entered, this one is of the more fluffy variety, very light on the conflict, and very heavy in the cozy atmosphere and wish fulfillment. I had a pleasant time with it and I can imagine that is was quite an escapist piece to write.

The story is a simple one of a hyena bookseller (Tyler), spending his days frustrated with the state of the world, goes on a walk in the park and comes across a winged wolf (not-angel named Aryaman), playing an instrument. Turns out he's a celestial being based on a Hindu deity (I'm guessing). As a meet-cute, they share a meal, they talk about stuff, they meet up again at the book store, talk a little bit more, and then go back to the Tyler's place to eat and make out. It's very light on the plot, and if any conflict is present, it's a slight internal conflict with the Tyler for being too distraught with life that meeting Aryaman has given him a reason to not feel so bad. The one thing about this story is that because it's very slice of life, it takes time to explore the very mundane aspects of Tyler's day to day, from managing the bookstore, to ordering tacos, to talking about his problems about the change in culture shift with his friend, and as a result, the relationship between Tyler and Ayraman feels a bit forced, especially since Aryaman has very little context for what is going on and Tyler also doesn't seem to know a whole lot about Ayraman. Having Ayraman be more involved in the scenes, like say, inserting himself to help instead of being a passive bystander, may give the two more chances to play off each other and interact.

The presentation is really cute, the sprites and cgs are really expressive, and I appreciate the sprite flips so that the sprites can look like they're talking to each other. Doing the flipping animation every time is a bit of a choice, and could be a bit distracting. The backgrounds being custom 3D are also nice touches to make it more unique. I will say that the writing does come off as a bit mechanical, but also that it tends to get really detailed and descriptive in the oddest ways. Maybe because it's comes easy to describe food and books, but then that means that it feels like those are the important aspects of the story and focus gets drawn to them, rather than the most interesting thing in the room which is the winged-wolf. Plus, there were the side characters, which while great for filling out the scene to feel lived in, don't contribute much to the plot especially as the fox-cashier seems to show a lot of consideration towards Tyler, ends up just going and hanging out with Deva. Which Deva is great for a contrast in personalities, but also, there's not really a central conflict for this story to sink it's teeth into.

In terms of folklore, I appreciate that it delves straight into this Sanskrit poetry motif, which admittedly I had to look up, and then also realize that I don't really know how it connects with the story. I think as a result, aside from the character saying he's this celestial being and speaking Sanskrit, there's not really a lot for me to make that connection (he says he's not an angel, but like, he could be and I don't know how much the story would change). Likewise, aside from the inherent creativity of designing all the characters and coming up with the plot, the plot and character relationships seem familiar and recognizable, which isn't a bad thing, just something I'm pointing out. 

In terms of aiming for a cozy slice-of-life story, I think you got what you were aiming for. If you were trying to hit some kind of romantic subplot, or have a bigger character arc be present, then I think that's where this story fell short. The thing with romantic plots is that there needs to be some kind of friction in place between the two romantic characters. Usually some kind of personal flaw that one character is working through, and overcomes in order to be with their love interest. In this story, the only friction is that Ayraman doesn't show up for 3 days, and after that, they completely get along and nothing seems to stand in-between their supposed attraction to each other. I would say for future stories you may do, try to look into giving characters a stronger flaw that they either overcome, or compliments the love interest in some way. You'd be surprised how unlikable you can try to make your characters, and readers will still like them if they feel like they have more than one dimension. On the other hand, you could give your story more of a stronger outside force that drives the conflict.  Like for this one, maybe the bookstore is going to shut down unless they make enough profit to pay building rent, or Aryaman is sent on a mission to complete or he can't return to heaven (or where ever he's from). Otherwise, you'll end up with an admittedly safe but fluffy-sweet story.

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'The Tale of Drac da Na Coca' is a fantasy adventure story, told through the lens of a DnD campaign and the flavor of Spanish folklore. I think what really appeals to me about this entry is the abundance of the Spanish culture imbued in the visual novel. From the little touches of Spanish traditions, the terms of endearment used, and the aesthetic flair, it does a great job of putting it's viewpoint front and center, and showing of all the small moments that this adventuring party has.

The story is fairly straight-forward DnD fair, an evil dragon is planning to brainwash the city and a group of adventurers bands up to go stop the ritual. You have the party members, the warlock, who is compelled to go on his patron's orders. The paladin who goes as a warrior of good and light, wanting to stop the evil dragon on principal. The bard and the rogue, who each have their own code of honor to put their lives on the line for the defeat of the dragon. There's the march up the mountain, the camp, the ambush, the calm before the storm, the infiltration, and the final battle. It follows the logical progression, even taking the time to flash back to how the group all met in the first place, as well as pair up in their romantic ships. The visual novel actually has choices, where you can get bad, neutral and technically good ends! Sure, they're based on whether or not you follow the script of the hero or turn tail and run like cowards, but the fact that the bad ends actually exist and really take the time to hammer in how badly you fucked up, by making your potential new life a hollow one, and still getting controlled by the dragon in the end is so good in leaning into the bad end. The good end, while technically a good end, is more of a tragic heroism, as while you're able to prevent the major catastrophe, you end up sacrificing your lives in order to do it. At least you got to have one final romp in the tent and the city puts up a mural and statue in the town to remember you by, and the tales of your heroism inspire others to do the same. Nothing too cheesy and sweet, which some folks like the bittersweet endings or the ones where not everything works out in the end. Mature. That said, I did feel like there wasn't a lot of plot momentum, and it tended to meander a bit. The walk up the mountain was slow, we get two separate flashbacks, a scene to set up camp, a scene to fight a guy, a sex scene, a slice-of-life scene with breakfast, the final action sequence scene, and then a scene with two townsfolk that we suddenly focus on in the epilogue. Remember that each scene should set up the next scene, and try to focus on the details that are either going to  give more context or are answering a question that the plot has presented. Like, for the flashback scenes, we already know that the characters are all friends and companions, so needing to see how they met is a little redundant, however entertaining they are. Consider trying to utilize those flashbacks as ways to also support the main plot, like, more information about the dragon instead of having the players talk about it for the reader's sake.

The presentation is really fun. I dig the character designs for the sprites of the heroes, very good at conveying what classes they were. The way the text was manipulated for emphasis in certain ways, the way the screen would darken when the warlock patron would talk was always fun, and even all the little animations that the sprites did helped to immerse the reader more. There was even the inclusion of the axolotl knight from the pre-rendered sprites, but you re-drew it in your style for consistency, very fun.  Plus the backgrounds being mainly self-taken I assume, as you were hiking is such a fun personal touch, that while at first it took a while to get used to it, actually gave it a distinct sense of area and mood. The writing did start to feel a little bit mechanical as it was going through the motions of describing the action scenes and how everything is filtered through Robert's (the main guy warlock) perspective. The dialog and banter was top notch through, as each character had their own personality, and there were some funny lines in there to liven up what was otherwise a pretty tragic story. There were a few technical issues, stuff like names not fitting in the name box, some of the darker green text being tough to read, and the two bad endings having some error in their code that doesn't hit the epilogue or something. Did I mention the great audio and music direction? It also really gave a great Spanish flair to it.

As for folklore, it's always fun to learn about interesting myths and legends, and then adapting that to a DnD campaign feels like the prescribed route to take for this kind of game jam. I won't fault it for doing so, since the jam invites it, so I'll say that it does the genre right by leaning into portraying it as the story, rather than as everyone playing the game which is the story (it was the angle I took in my entry last year). I enjoyed the Spanish flavor to a DnD campaign, so I'd say that that part is pretty creative.

I want to say that the overall theme trying to be expressed in this story is the sort of classic "face your fears, because if you don't you'll regret it more if you ran away." Part of me wonders if having the bad endings be the routes where you survive with your wolf would feel worse if you ended up with survivor's guilt, as not only did Robert have to mind control his wolf, but the city still fell to corruption, and he would have to live with that hollow victory. That being said, I thought the team that put this together did a great job for a first time entry. Lots of character moments, some real stakes, and while I don't think any of them had a particular character arc, it's still good to read about heroes doing heroic things. For a first time go at a visual novel, this is really good stuff especially with the time constraints. I'm sure in the next one, you'll start seeing all the little things you can do to up the polish.

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'Lunar Folly' is a romantic story about trad-thoughts, prejudice, and classic werewolves acting as a plot device and also a metaphor for 'the other' in society. It's good to see a proper 'werewolf' story in this 'my wolf' game jam about folklore. Of course that means that it's a human based story, in order to actually have the transformation part of the werewolf bit make sense. I think what makes this rendition stand out from other werewolf stories the pure indulgence and appreciation of the werewolf form and transformation. Most other stories are going to either downplay that part by making the werewolf this monstruous and unpleasant experience, or going the anime wolf-boy route with some sharp teeth and wolf ears. This one gets right into what makes werewolves appealing, large fuzzy cuddly men with just a hint of danger with those sharp teeth.

The story follows Mitch as he is 'hunting/tracking' the rumors of a werewolf in the forest. He finds one! Turns out that werewolves aren't monsters, they just guys who transform and look like that (course they could also kill, but isn't that true of humans too?). Mitch is conflicted, because his world has opened up, and he's tempted to want to be a werewolf too since society has left him feeling suffocated and trapped in his trad-relationship with his childhood friend (who is also a woman non-conforming to society). As he attempts to run away, turns out that part of that is a lie, and the werewolf is actually one of the villagers who likes to transform in secret and there isn't some kind of roaming free pack of gay werewolf men (oh yeah, Mitch is gay). Of course, his fiancé finds out, and is rightfully upset because she's getting the short end of the stick not just from Mitch, but also the whole village and her family all kinda resent her for not being 'a good house wife who needs to get back in the kitchen'. They make up because, and plan to call off the wedding proper (I don't know if this solves her problem, but at least they'll stop having to put on a front so other folks will be nice to them).  Course, free from his husbandry duties, Mitch is free to be who he really is and get transformed into a werewolf for some hot werewolf transformation sex (or not if you're monetizing a live read recording).

Honestly, it's a great story, and I jest in pointing out some of the uncomfortable circumstances, but the extra friction in the story makes the release of tension and pure indulgence all the more satisfying. The art is once again really great, love the stylization, and the humans don't look too bad. Course the cg scenes also get a big thumbs up from me, very hot and something that I don't see all that often. The writing is adequate and gets the right amount of emotion in the dialog to stress certain scenes. I do feel like it can get a tad anachronistic when some words and phrases pop up, examples like being called a 'dude' or 'throw me under the bus', when I'm pretty sure the established setting is some kind of late middle-age period and hasn't reached the industrial period where buses exist. I think there's one moment where a character label wasn't attributed right, but it happened during the sexy scene, so I imagine it's easily overlooked.

I really liked the folklore aspect of this entry. It highlighted the traditions of folklore, but also highlighted some of the negative effects of folklore as well, how they could perpetuate false or harmful stories, establish traditions where the original context has been far removed, or even use it as justification for prejudice types of thinking. I haven't even mentioned all the allusion to a werewolf as a metaphor for being gay and how having to keep it hidden to please your family/society and only letting it come out makes the person feel 'more alive'. It's a new twist on a classic trope for the werewolf story genre, and I think it do anything bright and flashy, it still left an impact with it's strong narrative choices, and grounding the emotional arc in realism. It could've been easy to do a "runs away to start a new life" ending, but having to stay and deal with the problems I think is a more interesting choice, even if we're only left to speculate on how that might play out.

I'm really glad that chmron picked up on a lot of comments from last May Wolf to "let the hot guys have sex". Not that the rest of the visual novel also wasn't a nice experience, with all it's twists and turns, but I mean, c'mon, hot werewolf sex. I really have any notes for how this could be executed any better (aside from a few slight clean ups), I think you achieved what you set out to make. The scope was kept in check, I could easily see this appealing to a nice chunk of the audience. Maybe it feels a bit melodramatic in certain parts, but that's totally works for this kind of story where 'society' is the root cause of your problems. What more can I say, this is good.

'The Burning of Tula Valdi's Zozobra' is the personal drama of one man's obsession and his spiral into madness. This is quite the tale being told as it lets the reader literally go through the thought processes of this lion man, how his initial infatuation spirals into anxiety and spirals into depression. How he laments over what is real and what isn't. How he whips himself up into an emotional frenzy and then scours every possibility to justify it's existence. So caught up in his assertion that started out as love at first sight, morphs into a pride unable to admit mistakes, devolves into a fear of being forgotten, and then even with reality staring him in the face and the possibility of life and happiness before him, he instead clings on to his delusions. Out of fear? Out of pride? Out of stubbornness. If there is one thematic throughline through this story, despite the title alluding to anxiety, what I interpreted it to be was a tale about stubbornness, and how it can drive men to misery.

The story takes place over the course of a year, as the main character, a lion named Tula, catches the glimpse of a wolf at a festival. He didn't approach him, out of anxiety, but now he spends his days planning to meet the wolf again next year at the festival. He obsesses by trying to remember every little detail correctly so when he can find him again, he can be sure. This obsession starts to become a pleasurable delusion for Tula, as he starts to hallucinate the wolf, and in his mind, he falls in love with the idea of the wolf. Thinking that every detail he can remember is yet another way he gets to know him before actually knowing him. The story then follows moments in his year as he interacts with the towns folks that supplement the overall theme. A drunken regular gets too old for his regular drinking nights and starts to forget his stories of his youth. His boss who thinks that a patron has locked himself in one of the bedrooms and is not paying, yet turns out there was never any patron there all week. Even a flashback of Tula, unable to remember his father's face as he left when he was very young. Yet as the day approaches and Tula can finally meet the wolf again, he finds out that the wolf was never there to begin with. Even with evidence to suggest that he could be mistaken, unable to reconcile with the possibility of being mistaken, in order to rid himself of the immense anxiety he literally has to burn a caravan, much like the burning of the zozobra, in order to feel at ease. Of course, in doing so, he's in very big trouble, but that's to be expected. I skipped over a lot of important bits, but really, the story is really well crafted, with a ton of great moments of introspection, the internal conflict with himself as he argues with his own subconscious, trying to out logic himself. Even the glimmers of hope as there's opportunities presented to him to steer clear of his obsession. Yet, as all tragedies are inevitable, Tula is unable to fully reconcile with himself, an plea to the reader to take caution from his tale.

The presentation is really unique, between all the digital pictures and the photos of real life sketch book art, it really helps re-enforce the themes of 'what is real?' as the story goes through and Tula spirals. The music and the sound effects are all great at immersing the reader, from the simple brushes of leaves to the fires. The writing is probably the most impressive part of this visual novel. It takes a lot of craftsmen ship to be able to write dialog that feels authentic and where each character has their own voice. There was quite a bit of looking up words due to my unfamiliarity with them, but I got the jist of what it was going for. Tula themselves is a really complex and layered character at that, both extremely observant and yet so narrow-minded, such a great choice for a character to follow.

The folklore aspect is incorporated into the story in the way where it's integral to the plot, without having to explicitly state where it's from. Granted I did have to look up the definition for some of the terms and do a bit of research to get the connection, so there's a little homework involved for those not in the know, but once I did, the rest of the story made a lot of sense to me, and I thought it was a really clever way to go about writing this story. In terms of creativity, just really creative use of the sketch book photos to help give even more of the vibe of, I would go so far as to say dissociating, how pulling away from the picture to even seeing the surrounding sketchbook and area that it's in, is just a cool effect and adds even more meaning in some way.

It's crazy that this seems to be a first time VN by Team Dance Mountain, it brings a fresh perspective into the vn space, and a really strong first impression of the type of works that you do. One might wonder if the sketchbook style is a one-off for this visual novel based on the narrative, but seems like y'all have the foundations to craft a VN to suit the story that y'all would want to tell. I can tell that some folks are going to love the verbose style of this VN, with the descriptive prose, the excess of details to flesh out the world and the small character interactions in the story. My only criticism might just be that I would've liked a bit more wolf scenes in relation to the world-building scenes, and even then this is just a nit-pick. Those delusional fantasies are what fuel Tula's obsession, and getting to see one where he gets something out of it would help sell why he's willing to ignore what's in front of him. But, where it is right now, it already gives that implication, so, yeah, I just think this is a great entry.

'A Transforming Night to Remember!' is a light-hearted farce about going cryptid hunting and proceeding to indulge in some very particular kinks/fetishes. What's to say about this particular story other than it's just a fun romp, that almost plays out like a porno-plot, and I don't hate it for that. It also features two fairly uncommon kinks, in transformation into clothing and shrinkage with some macro/micro play. It stands out as being a blatant vehicle to have some fun with the pre-rendered sprites and to stick in as many weird and out-of-pocket moments as they could.

The story starts out with the group of friends going out into a cabin to search for a cryptid known as the "Automated Peacock", which was a clockwork peacock that was created in olden times and has just existed up until today, and he uses his sword cock to put his 'victims' into states of arousal so he may then transform them using automaton magic or something. Then when the suspiciously metallic peacock host goes off to bed, the guys start their cryptid hunt, only for the automatic peacock to start picking them off one by one. Of course, he catches the reader who then can choose to be transformed into something that might help his rocky relationship with his boyfriend (into a pair of underwear or shrunk down micro-size). Either way, the boyfriend finds you, and you have the option to indulge in some pretty hot kinky sex with the transformed you. Then you go looking and find out that the host was the automated peacock the whole time, and that now he has to go into hiding again, now that they know his secret. But, he leaves the reader with the ability to transform so that the reader and his boyfriend can continue to have sexy fun with this new ability.

The presentation really makes as much use as it can out of the pre-rendered sprites and animation to sell the fantasy of a sexy porno that features transformation. Featuring the automaton peacock's sword cock is quite a feat for a jam. Little extra details like zooming in the sprite to simulate being small or putting the blush on the undies to show that it's the character transformed are really cute bits. Even when the friend tanuki was just a cock and balls, really funny moments all around. And that's not to say there wasn't non-sexy funny bits, stuff like the obliviousness to the peacock's true identity or stuff like signing a release form are just fun touches. The writing is fun, it gets a little bit weird in which POV is happening in certain scenes, but overall, was easy enough to follow.

There's the hint of a folklore element in this one, it helps that they told the full story of the cryptid, but I feel like at some points it was taking itself to seriously that it feels disconnected from the overall tone the visual novel is going for. I'd say that you could've really leaned in more into the absurdity of the situation, and played up the humor even more. Part of me thinks you could've used another sprite as a stand-in for the main character, especially since once they get transformed it feels like they suddenly gain a position in the screen instead of being the camera view point. The creativity to just lean into the ridiculous nature of the plot really sold it for me. Seeing the peacock with a sword dick and going "yes, they will use that to cut off the clothes of the other characters anime style" is just a fun scene to watch. I would also suggest maybe to give the friends a bit more distinct personalities, just to help give some texture to the cast. Give them some differing opinions about the kink, just how horny they are, or other little quirks.

I can see that this is a particular interest to this author, and I'm glad that they could indulge it even more in this one. It's fun to see what can be done with the pre-rendered sprites, and I think does a fantastic job of even showing that sexual scenes can still be done, even if there aren't custom cgs made as big splash centerfolds. It seems as long as there's game jams with free assets to be used, there's going to be more of these fun sexy farces, so I hope you continue writing about your favorite kinks, I could see you expanding into other lesser used kinks as well, just for the fun of it.

'Clam Story' is an existential, surreal, and dreamlike recursive story that seems to be a Rorschach test for the reader to implement their own introspective thoughts and feelings as to what the 'true meaning' is actually about. The deceptively simple title and the hand-drawn art betray the intensity of what the story wants to convey to the reader. Is the creature human? Is it a demon? Is this even furry? Is this world based on Earth? Is this a metaphor? Is this a time loop? Do I take this at face value? Is this actually nothing? (Yes and no to all of these questions really.) Does the author care? Does the reader care? Should the reader care? (I just spent an hour of my life that could've been spent reading and reviewing someone else's entry.) Does this author even want me to give it a fair shake? Are they laughing at me? Are the concerned that I don't understand it? Is there some kind of prose that's happening here so profound that it's going over my head? Does it even want me attempting to decipher what it could mean? Is it about environmentalism and global warming? How about a commentary on the ruthlessness of war and sociopolitical environment that cultivates it? Is it a metaphor for mental health? How about the value of art as a concept? Is there a religious angle to it? Maybe it's about love and acceptance? Is it about pointlessness and tragedy? Is it just provoking me in the way you slap someone in the face just to get a reaction?

(I can't answer that.)

The story is about a creature on a beach. A wolf exists. There is a clam. Stuff happens. The world ends. The end.

The presentation is surprisingly competent. The art is very simple and crude, the wolf taking on an almost child-like drawing appearance, yet the backgrounds and text boxes having deliberate animation and text font changes. This gives me the impression that a lot of this is done deliberately by design. Little things like how detailed some of the props are or the drawing of the leaf-god with so many little leaves leads me to believe that there's just a tad too much effort put into this to be a shit-post. Yet, I also know the lengths one would go for a shit-post are far greater than I can reasonably fathom. Is the prose good? IDK. Does it have anything to do with folklore? No. Is it creative? If you consider a rage room to be an artistic creative endeavor, then sure.

Even checking the history of the author, comes up empty. Am I being trolled? I don't know. The author clearly put a lot of effort into the presentation and substantial word count, so does it deserve praise for that alone? Is it hiding behind a facade of obfuscation as to avoid criticism? Is to even attempt to give constructive feedback a fools errand? Am I to be mocked by this? Am I to be shunned for questioning the integrity of the author? Does the author care about integrity to begin with? I've spent a second hour of my time towards trying to provide a proper critique or feedback, so take that time spent as a gift, for any feedback I could give is nothing. I feel like others may appreciate this entry more than me. Good for them.

'Remember the Forefathers' is a dramatic tragedy that examines the purpose of folklore tales within communities and how they can bring peace of mind and hope to those dealing with uncertainty and fear. 'Absolute cinema', is how I'd describe this visual novel entry. It knows what kind of message and tone it wants to set, it gives just enough context and details to immerse the reader, and it develops in a way where the as the narrative goes along, the layers peel back and more and more of the what the reality of the situation is. It leaves a lasting impact, and is extremely effective and efficient with what it needs to convey to give a resolution to this story. It's highly recommended that you read this visual novel going in blind, just to get the authentic experience. I'll be spoiling the climax and the twists and turns as I talk about it, so last chance to go read it if you're looking at the reviews before picking it.

The story itself starts out as if the main character, Lucas, is sitting in a forest, lighting a small pyre/campfire being prepared to talk about a tradition of 'remembering the forefathers'. He seemingly is talking to no one in particular, which is odd, but goes on to ramble about what the traditions mean and what they mean to him. Then comes in the wolf man, who knows Lucas but something is wrong. Turns out that it's the wolf's time to tell a story, and it's about how he was depressed, apathetic, and suicidal, but there was someone who made him feel like he should live towards being alive, very much the savior backstory for these two. Cut back from this really nice flashback, and we're actually in a war torn zone, and not a forest, and Lucas is actually dying after being caught in some kind of collateral damage next to rubble, the pyre actually just a flashlight. The reveal that these are the dying thoughts of Lucas as he reconciles with the unfairness of life and death, and how he faces death with dignity despite it all.

I only summarize it cause it wouldn't do it justice to retell the whole thing, but this is an extremely effective presentation of this story. Everything from the way the start screen only has the start button right at where the pyre is starting, the very creepy and dramatically dark art work with characters having blacked out eyes, the way the CGs are then presented in this black and white sketchy form, to how so much visual storytelling is done through the art itself. Also, the audio design is on point, extremely effective in conveying what's going on with the ambient noises, from crunching leaves, the lighting of the pyre, the gun shots in the distance, it's all combines together into a package that is a multiplicative combination of it's parts. The writing too, it's very evocative, with so many good descriptors in it's prose. The emotion coming through for the wolf in the dialog, the resignation from Lucas. Even the quick cut ending, to really put a period at the end of the story, is just so effective.

The folklore aspect is front and center. In a way, this particular entry makes me scoff at all the folks who claimed that the theme was uninspiring because this is a great example of how folklore is an important aspect of the story, without it being just a simple retelling of a folk tale. It tells a particular folktale, but also gets philosophical about the purpose of them, which is quite a nice bit of introspection. The creativity to put this together and present it in a way is great. There's so many bold choices made for this one, the way that the start screen is built into the narrative, the choice of the sudden ending, the way to present the story one way only to reveal what the true nature was later. This is a great example of knowing what bits are important to the emotional arc, and which bits are important to the plot narrative. We as readers understand the fears of Lucas through what stories he tells himself, and we understand how much Lucas means to the wolf through the story that he told.

If there's any feedback that I would give this for the sake of giving feedback, I think maybe a little bit more detail in grounding the narrative in reality once the reveal has happened. This is more of a personal preference, since I'm sure plenty of the more artsy readers would love reading the subtext between all the details to determine where in the world this would be. The wolf's backstory could be used to help reveal a bit more of who exactly these characters are, rather than speaking in more emotional general terms (the classic 'I was alone, but you came along and made life worth living') maybe play more into the reality of being a war torn area, and that's what could really make it just a bit more impactful when the reveal comes right after. Otherwise, CMoon has made amazing strides in their visual novel entries over the past year, and it's kind of crazy how quickly they've improved in their presentation skills and honing in on their author voice. There's definitely a running theme of embracing the tragedy in his stories, and I wouldn't change that at all, it's a tough skill to be able to write emotionally tiring subject matter. Keep doing what you're doing dude, whether you want to keep doing these darker stories or branching out into other genres, you've got some solid chops.

'Its You Again and Again' is a conceptual romance about a universe jumper who falls in love with the same guy over and over again in the different universes he jumps to. It's an intriguing magic/sci-fi premise that examines the role that the individual has against forces of the universe they have no control over. I really appreciate and love this premise as in fiction it truly takes the concept to an extreme point, "What if you had something so out of your control, that randomly out of nowhere, you literally lose everything and everyone you know and have to make do and survive again from point zero?" How does one have a positive mindset about that? When folks try to offer advice or support, how can one do so without coming off a patronizing or unsympathetic? I'm pretty sure this is reminiscent of a Doctor Who story arc, but aside from that, this story does well to immerse the reader into what it's like following Kali (the main guy), as they grapple with the reality of their situation and look to find happiness and companionship.

The story is deceptively simple, as it starts out with a classic meet-cute, a dinner followed by a hook-up back at the wolf's place. The dinner conversation is interesting as it cuts away to the folklore (of this folklore game jam) which involves the name of a town Pinefall, and how the moral of the story is to take only what you need. Kali is really cagey about his past and why he disappears for lengths of time, and that's because he literally disappears into an alternate universe, where he has to make do and survive with only the clothes on his back (in the first jump he's literally in just his underwear). He ends up doing another meet-cute with a wolf that looks suspiciously like the wolf he went on a date with. It then follows a montage of universe hops, each time running into that world's version of the wolf. Until he finally gets back to the first world and can meet up with the first wolf again a year later. Unfortunately as he's explaining his circumstance and getting accused of lying, he jumps back to his original home universe, a world that succumbed to a zombie apocalypse. Of course he finds his wolf there too, but this one is infected and he has to kill him to keep the host from spreading. Then Kali goes on his dark night of the soul journey giving up on trying to contact his wolf as he continues to jump worlds. Then eventually getting back to the first one again and it all works out, I think.

The presentation is cute and simple, and its surprising how varied the backgrounds and character designs end up being as the story progresses. There's some great shots of tail wagging and the bits where the story shifts into folklore mode are the most impactful parts, in my opinion. The way the puppetry and the storybook quality moments just stand out and have so much character are really great for the resources that you have. The music is simple and effective at setting the mood, even if it's fairly sparse. The moments where the scene changes suddenly is also really impactful as well. The writing quality gets the job done, I don't think I was ever particularly confused about how a scene was going until Kali started getting a little bit 'train of thought' as he monologued about his situation. I will say that the inclusion of the hypnosis element, introduced early to explain how Kali is able to easily survive upon universe jumping by mooching off a random stranger and wiping their memory of him, I expected it to be a more integral part of the story. I suppose that the story was more interested in the struggle of involuntary universe jumping, that it didn't also want to have to grapple with the morality of manipulating people for your own survival, or other pesky reality difficulties like different languages or different cultures.

The folklore element, while I think tied into the story thematically about 'taking what you need' in a sort of selfishly taking his wolf's love and affection, but I don't know how effective it was in combining the two elements. Like, is Kali being punished for upsetting a fey creature? I think there was a conversation about the value of depressing stories vs uplifting stories, and how one may have more value than the other based on who is reading it, but it also never quite settles on answering that question, instead just letting the story play out and making the reader decide if it was uplifting or depressing. The story itself is definitely the most creative aspect of this visual novel, as it's a crazy concept, and there's a lot of details that could really make this story not work if you look too closely at the details, but I think it also works well as a metaphor for just any other kind of unfortunate situation where the person has no agency in how it happens to them. It's one of those stories that is so unrealistic that it asks the reader to suspend their disbelief in order to ponder what could reasonably be done and how would one actually respond to such an terrible circumstance.

It's great to see KnowIt continue to make visual novels in his unique style, always coming up with the wildest plot devices and worlds for his characters to exist in. This one is a step up, I feel since it tells a complete story within the bounds of the game jam on an interesting premise. Something that I would offer to consider is exploring that cut-out puppet style of art in one of your future visual novel projects. It came across really effectively, and I think you could do something really interesting expanding on that particular art style. An entire VN in that style could stand out crazy in another game jam you might do. Writing wise, I would say you're really good at having these crazy premises, but then I think you end up ignoring some of the natural conflicts and friction that those premises would bring up. While some mysteries don't always need to be solved in order to tell the story you want to tell, they can end up feeling like plot conveniences if there isn't some kind of rule system for them. Still, the core of the story is that a kindhearted soul can come in many forms, but still at it's core be good, and I think that's a worthwhile theme to express

'My Tainted Life' is the first chapter in what looks to be an adventure story not unlike many of the RPG video games that it draws inspiration from. It follows a runaway prince-priest who, a wielder of healing magic, is trying to escape his role as the army's heal bot to go and experience the freedom of the world. It's gives some realism to the video-game-y aspects of healing and how valuable that skill would be in a society to the point that those that could wield it would be locked up and used for the sheer benefit they provide to the rest of the community at large. It's an intriguing line of reasoning that said persons would be looked at less than people and more as tools as they are denied their ability to lead a life that they could choose.

The story follows the prince-priest, Manfrey, as he's on the verge of running away from the city, and in doing so will be labeled a deserter, and bounty pages would be placed around to guarantee his return. However, before Manfrey can get too far, he's immediately tracked down by Chris/Moon Blade/the general of the army/one of the highest leveled characters in the city to bring him back. Chris is what you would call a tool, in a figurative and literal sense, which follows orders and doesn't question anything about it, and is bringing back Manfrey because he was ordered to by his prince brother. Of course, Chris hides his power-level until a powerful tainted mob shows up to start wrecking the place, and then suddenly there's the big clash of ideals between Manfrey and Chris. What's more important, the use that one can bring to their community by playing their designated role or is it better for the individual to decide how best to use their own talents for the greater good? Obviously, Manfrey is going to use his healing powers where he can, as he easily gives up his cover so he can help the citizens and guards who defended the tavern against an attack, but Chris says that being on the front lines is not where he should be and instead just leave the fighting to the fighters and healing to the healers. They never really come to an agreement, and they really shouldn't cause this is just the opening chapter, and it seems to want to lead into a fuller exploration into an RPG level story for this fighter-priest's journey into becoming a paladin.

The presentation is extremely high quality, as expected from Team Eclipse, they've got so many good artists, musicians, programmers and designers that it's so polished, even for a month creation. The UI and loading screens are all fantasy themed, all the backgrounds are evocative, and even the special moment CGs really give weight in the story where it's needed. The healing kisses, the duel and the big fight against the tainted monster, all painted with amazing quality. Sound design is great. Character sprites are great, love the border-less style. Really, there's hardly anything to complain about when it comes to the actual visual and immersive experience with this one. The writing is good, it's carries the plot along well. It'll change view points a few times which, going from the prince, to the blacksmith, and back to the prince, which can be a bit disorienting, but I understand why it was done, so that the reader can understand how Chris was able to find him so quickly, but part of me wonders if that extra scene was needed, as perhaps the introduction of Chris as coming off as this undercover adventurer with a hidden agenda would've been more impactful, if we didn't already know who he was when Manfrey first meets him. While I love the idea that a stronger healing spell includes kisses on the cheek and the mouth, the way that the story seemed to then lean into the lovey-dovey section with Manfrey and Chris, the laying and cuddling afterwards and the affectionate talk between them, seems to come out of left field. A bit too early in the story to be alluding towards a romantic connection, when up to that point, Chris has been emotionally detached and Manfrey has all but been annoyed and distrustful of Chris lying to him and wanting to take away his freedom. The way that the story will continue as the start of this adventuring party, now with a healer and a fighter, it does give promise for what new fun characters and potential party members will be joining, as well as just how they'll be taking on this larger threat of 'the tainted' across their land.

As for the folklore theme, the story is very fantasy-rpg game based, so it's influenced by several of the hallmarks of the genre. Fantasy fights with tainted monsters, magical powers for healing and offense, a status based hierarchy, etc. It doesn't really try to frame the story using any specific folklore, nor does it try to introduce a custom piece of folklore for the setting, so this story definitely feels more like a personal project that happened to aligns somewhat with the theme, and that's fine by me. As long as it spurs the creation of a new VN, then I'm happy, even though I'd probably rate it lower on that particular measure. I don't know how creative I would call this, as it's doesn't seem to be breaking new ground, and I'm not mad at it for taking a tried and true set up and doing their own spin on it. All the assets to make this are of very high quality, and in that there is inherent creativity, but the combined product is a sum of it's parts.

Overall, another really high quality and polished entry into the game jam from Team Eclipse. It's a real skill that they're able to complete such visual novels while managing such a large team and not somehow end up with feature bloat or mismanaged efforts. Scope management is also something that I applaud because especially with the idea of having a much larger novel in mind and only completing a single chapter, it's tough, because the chapter has to have a small arc of it's own, while still letting the story have room to grow. Plus, it does do a good job in introducing all the new concepts and characters to the readers in an efficient and meaningful way. It is still just a chapter, so I tend to err on the side of caution as it can be easy to throw a bunch of ideas into early chapters and leave it unfinished so as to never have to worry about resolving any of the introduced ideas. So I only hope that when this story is continued, these elements are kept in mind. Fun read!

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'Encounters in the Moonlight' is a meet-cute into sexy-times scene, with a bit of a familiar 'overcoming homophobia' character arc. It's one more of those entry point stories about being gay, getting ostracized by your family and community, only to be rescued by a big hot wolfman who immediately finds you attractive and you have hot intercourse under the moonlight. The story does some interesting world-development for a scene, as it alludes to a significant technological and culture difference between Solus and Lucius, the two characters.

The way the story goes is that Solus is on Earth during an era of tribalism, goes out into the forest, gets attacked by a beast and is rescued by Lucian, who's from the moon, is alluded to have been a highly scientific space colony from when the Earth had undergone some kind of Armageddon and now they're coming back to see if the world is hospitable again. It's a fun dynamic, which gives a bit of 'Star Trek' first contact vibes, plus bringing in a lot of modern cultural advancements to contrast with the more primitive culture of shunning homosexuality. There's some revelations given to Solus, who gets to fully embrace his inner feelings, and get to go visit the moon with Lucius who is really interested in him. It's a satisfying wish-fulfillment kind of story.

The presentation is really nice. The color aesthetic is consistent throughout, the art sprites are emotive and fun, there's drawn backgrounds and cgs, and can't forget about the custom cg sex scene which is the big wow-factor of the whole visual novel. There's also a lot of detail that goes into making the sprites blink and even have mouth movements for the speaking parts (that takes quite a bit of effort and knowhow). Overall it's a really impressive visual package that is probably some of the highest quality I've seen in this game jam. The writing is adequate for getting the two characters to meet 'n fuck. I'm not gonna lie and say that this is the most original set up or plot-line, the one detail of the Earth culture and Moon culture was the aspect that gave it something to stand out, otherwise, it's very much a classic gay coming out/angst story. You get a couple of weird incongruent story elements like how his first lover gets exiled, but he doesn't because special treatment just cause he's the important family's son. He begs to stay and feels a sense of loyalty to his tribe despite how badly they treat him and openly say how much they want him gone. It feels like while the story is a feel good framework, it doesn't do much other than to give a reason for the really good art and sex scene to exist. It's not a bad thing, and it's probably going to be someone's first experience with this kind of storyline (I've done plenty). It could make stronger choices in how it plays out to help it distinguish itself from other stories exactly like this, but I also imagine that as it's only this scene, the scope was limited to not further explore other details. We're told how the village treats Solus through a novel style monologue from him, and we're told about what the moon is like through Lucius explaining to Solus what it is. The plot device of the wolf beast is just so Lucius can save Solus, and the beast is never explained further. It might be stronger to show the scene happening where Solus is caught the first time to give a more viseral experience to connect with him better. While, Solus is the POV, you could always change view points to Lucius as he saves Solus and get a sense of Lucius in that way. Just as some suggestions/examples.

The folklore element of the visual novel I believe is the in-story folklore of the moon-god and how Solus believes Lucian to be of the moon come to take him to paradise. It's a cute way to tie in a religious element into the plot. As it's only one or two scenes, there's not much opportunity to explore that element further or how Solus's beliefs are completely shaken by finding out that his folklore/religion might be just stories and not fact (that might've been an interesting theme to explore). Creativity wise, there's some interesting seeds of ideas here. What's present however is kind of stock gay-angst wish-fulfillment which I will always welcome more of that into the world. The sex scene, while hot, also still is a sex scene.

From what I can see, this is a first timer entry, and for that, big props for completing it and giving it a really good polish. It's very pretty and it's a treat for the eyes. The writing gets the job done, and if it gives you the confidence to try to push yourself further next time, then I'll be happy. I'd say read a bunch of the VNs from these game jams to expand your reference pool for furry stories, see what elements you can pick up from them and see how you can incorporate those bits into your works in the future.

'The Badger's Moon' is a melancholic and serene slice-of-life story about an arranged marriage and the internal conflicts that come with reconciling with such conflicting emotions. It deals with the emotions of love, guilt, vulnerability,  being honest, and having the difficult talks that come with agreeing to be someone's life-partner. It does a really good job of grounding the situation, even if the cultural practice may seem out-of-time, it treats it with respect and from a point of practical realism.

The story of Brock and William is presented as the 'working through it' phase of an arranged marriage. Brock being the stoic and emotionally distant badger who accepted the marriage because he wanted a partner and was offered one through an arrangement, but now is feeling guilt ridden because the marriage was arranged and he can't bring himself to believe that William is fully happy with the arrangement. William on the other hand, agreed to be a part of the arrangement though a sense of cultural tradition, since as a wasgo (i think that's hybrid whale/wolf), his culture is one where wasgos are just married off like that because it brings the receiving family good luck and fortune. Though, as a result of the situation, William had to leave his home country to go live with Brock, away from his family and his then-lively hood as a hockey player. What then proceeds in the story is the slice of life moments where the two try to communicate with each other, bonding over mundane daily activities, and preparing to do a badger family cultural tradition that William wants to be apart of. When they finally start doing the tradition together, does Brock finally open up to have the difficult conversation of his inner-conflict of wanting a partner, but knowing that it may have taken Brock away from his path in life. Of course, William is an understanding guy and offers that he wants to make the marriage work in spite of that, and that they would need to work at it to make it work. The story is really serene and heartwarming as the two men are able to overcome their own inner turmoil to be able to commit towards making this marriage work.

The presentation is simple yet effective. The custom character sprites are cute and I love the extra detail you put into it by even having the wasgo have his tail wag. The custom cgs are great focal points, and the music choices are restrained enough to give just the right amount of ambiance to the scenes. The writing style is good. It does shift perspectives a few times, which I don't hate getting to be in the headspace of both characters, but I feel like if you were going to have the two different POVs, to maybe give a bit more time to William, since this story does seem to be primarily about Brock. I also feel like it took a little bit of narrative work to justify why these two got married in the first place, with it seeming like it was their parents ideas, but also Brock feeling partially responsible for it, while William is all for it yet. I feel like there could be a stronger narrative reason for the two men to be 'stuck' as the story would put it. It's mentioned that wasgo's are married into families as good luck, but for what business purpose did it serve? I can speculate that it might be Brock's work/company, or maybe there's a family business that needed the boost in luck? It seems a little weak as a justification. I get that Brock wants to be a reluctant participant, but there should be a narrative plot motivation that outweighs his initial concerns just barely. There's also the surprise twist that it ended up a same-sex marriage, which muddies that motivations even more. I feel like while you really wanted to focus on this spouse dynamic, a little more work put into the set up/situation would've helped it feel more believable, especially since it is rather random that a badger guy in Scotland and a hockey player wasgo from Canada end up in an arranged marriage. Like for this story, it feels like Brock and William only adhering to tradition blindly without thinking about the consequences or what that would entail. Yet, during the story they never question this blind adherence to tradition even though it's both making them feel guilt ridden about it.

That being said, it is a unique scenario that I would never have seen coming, so that's pretty creative. The folklore aspect is also really sweet, as framing the Gealach a' Bhruic as a bonding experience and the way for the two to share a cultural tradition is heartwarming (plus badger guy with the badger's moon tradition, that's cute). I remember how last year's game jam you did 'A Knight's Myosotis', and I remember that one being a bit longer and wordy, while this one you've really done a good job of distilling the story down to it's emotional essentials, which is the important bits. It's definitely a great improvement in the presentation and writing chops, and so now it's more of seeing what other fun ways to can enhance the reading experience. I'd suggest one thing to keep in mind is making sure that you know what your character's backstory is, as you don't always need to give a monologue about it, but know what about their past influences the way the make choices and the way they act in the present. Try to keep an idea of what your thematic throughline is, and what the message of your story might be saying. You're making steady improvements, and you're branching out to different genres, keep doin' that.

'I Will Haunt You' is a tragic novella about a ghost who haunts his boyfriend. It's quite a somber and sober look at not what it means to move on from something that is over. It's a simple story, but I think one that's distilled down to capturing just the essence of what the message of the story is trying to present.

The story centers around Beckett, a ghost, who was killed three years ago, and how he hasn't moved on from the mortal plane, instead staying and 'haunting' his boyfriend Rhett. Beckett tries to be a helpful ghost, moving things into useful places, and keeping watch over Rhett, but Rhett's still depressed. Then Beckett gets a new boyfriend and suddenly Rhett's starting to be happy again, but Beckett's jealous and distraught, still clinging to wanting to be with Rhett even through he's unable to actively be there physically for him. The reader then gets three options on how to respond to this revelation. One ending is one where he becomes vengeful and lashes out to scare away the new boyfriend, only to end up scaring away Rhett in the process. Another bad ending is where he also falls into despair, which ends up creating a space where Rhett pushes away his new boyfriend, thus leaving them together again, but alone and still miserable. The good ending is the one where Beckett accepts the finality of their situation and allows Rhett to continue to be happy without him, while he moves on as well, no matter how scary it may be. And like, that's all the surface level plot, but like a good fable it's got some fun interpretations or allusions that could be made. Replace the death of Beckett into any other situation in which this relationship could've ended and it gives a really compelling demonstration of the pitfalls of ruminating over a failing or ending relationship. The endings showing that how a person reacts to the situation matters, and can shape how that person experiences it.

The presentation is really good, the character sprites are expressive and simple, yet with bold but not gruesome details. Beckett's design of his bloodied shoulders from his neck is surprisingly tasteful. The art for the backgrounds and cgs are really good at conveying the moods of the scenes. The little animations that the sprite have add to the immersion. The music and sounds are adequate. The writing is simple, but effective. It's really good in how the three different endings all have their distinct voices, especially since it's such a singular character focused story. I appreciate the addition of letting the reader go back to the pivotal choice to pick a different path to experience it. The situation is non-descript as it needs to be in order to focus on the primary emotional conflict, Beckett wanting to be the only one who can help Rhett, when he himself is unable to be what Rhett needs.

As for the folklore element, I think this is a take on a classic ghost story/haunted house but from the view point of the ghost. I think I can think of a few haunted house stories that follow both the haunted and the haunters, so focusing solely on just the ghost makes it stand out a bit more. It makes me feel like it was a good starting point for the ghost-haunting-element, but it makes me wonder if you might've been able to find a ghost-story that you could connected it to better encapsulate the folk-lore element. I will offer that this is a solid entry for a game jam with a very manageable scope, and it checks all the boxes (bonus points for probably the best itch page design, it goes so hard), especially for a first time entry and what looks to be a first time solo project for you. Really nice showing. Looking forward to seeing what happens when you expand that scope a bit more, stuff like lengthening the plot and narrative, playing around with the structure of the story. This one works from the POV from the ghost, but it could also really work well from the POV of Rhett being haunted by his house and turning it into a mystery of why he's haunted. You've got a good foundation, so you can start experimenting.

'Jane Doe' is a drama/thriller about a guy falling in love with a psychopath. And I don't really mean that in a hyperbolic or inflammatory way, it more of what's on the label. It's got the suspense, it's got the drama, it's got me thinking of Beastars in terms of the dynamic between the deer main character and the wolf love interest. It does a good job of leaving the reader on the edge of their seat, but I wonder if it has the hooks to keep folks wanting to come back and see more.

It should be said that this is somewhat of a first act of a larger story, as we get the introduction to the two main characters, we get a meet-cute, and then we get the first date and the first big twist of one of the characters. We've got our main protagonist deer man, Lucan, a dejected CEO/higherup business man who's in a loveless marriage and lacks an emotional support system, meets the love interest wolf, Ren, a quirky, eccentric, and energetic flower shop owner who seems to appear to help bring the brooding, mundane protagonist out of his dark depressing life (literally parting the rainy clouds for a ray of sunshine). Of course, the big twist is that they're actually a manipulative psychopath who's done this before to other men, to blackmail them out of their money or worse. And suddenly, we can't trust anything that this wolf has presented as their personality. Are they really quirky and fun, or is it just a mask so they can get their next fix? Is any of what they say about their melancholic backstory true, or is it just lies to make other people sorry for them to drop their guard? Whether or not this turns into a redemptive romance or a cautionary horror story, well, it's still too early to say, since it's just the first act. That being said, it's a solid start to the narrative and it does make the pit your stomach just fall when you read it.

The presentation is really striking. The combination of close up sketchy outlines for internal monologues, and the simple character sprites make an effective way to convey the mood of a scene. At first I was going to mention how hard it is to make out some of the facial expressions on the wolf, only being to make out the eyes and mouth when they're open, until I got to the twist and realized it was likely on purpose, just to add in that element of not being able to tell what this wolf is thinking. Even as far as them being such an ambiguous gender. It's super solid in the music and atmospheric sound effects. I think it does a few ren'py dialog box tricks where it'll move past a line to show that it's being cut off as you're reading it and the other character is interrupting. It does get a little bit heavy handed with the imagery and the metaphors. The title of the story being "Jane Doe", reference to unidentified victims of crime and with a deer character, the ray of sunshine on the wolf in the rain, the spider lilies of the Dead End Flower Shop. It's just setting up the scene for a 'true crime podcast episode'.

The writing itself is serviceable. The dialog can feel a little bit stiff, and when the big reveal happens, it does get a little bit 'villain monologuing'. I believe the folklore tale that was incorporated into this story is the tale of the 'boy who cried wolf', which is an interesting connection to try to marry to the current plot, as I'm not sure who is the boy in this metaphor. It's a little bit more 'wolf in sheep's clothing' type of tale. Does it feel a little clunky to add into the plot be it only being part of the first date between the two? Kind of. Though I will say that the idea of transforming one of Aesop's classic tales into a contemporary drama story is a cool and creative premise, especially if you're going in aiming for a psychopathic villain type of plot. I don't know if this story quite reaches that mark, if that's what this was aiming for at all. 

Overall, it's a pretty good first timer jam entry. There's a lot of stylization and the art is great. The story will be gripping and interesting for some, but after seeing the reveal, I don't know if I need to read the rest to speculate what might happen. It is only the first act, so I can't give too much on feedback on what can or should happen should you continue to work on this and expand this to it's full conclusion. I'd say the biggest questions for me story wise, are eventually wanting to find out what the motivation and goal of Ren is, seems like this might be shrouded in mystery on purpose though. What's to become of Lucan, both in physical and emotional health. And what's the thematic through-line that this story is meant to have? Is it that blind trust is a virtue? That the meek shall be consumed by the wicked? Can someone be called wicked if it is just their base nature? Does everyone truly get what's coming to them? If you were hoping to make this more of a cliffhanger, I would suggest keeping the cards closer to your chest, maybe have the confrontation in the alley way just be another opportunity to sow uncertainty with Lucan walking in on the situation and getting two conflicting stories. Just something to keep in mind.

Bro is frontin' y'all. 'ithinkitslikesomeisekaiwattpadthingidk' (or is the movie called 'Anubis College'? whatev) is a meta-humorous false-film parody of 'My Wolf' visual novels, furry visual novels in general, and way too much poking fun at the uncs by tormenting them with Gen Z/Alpha/slop slang and vernacular. And in spite of it's attempt to come off as an incompetent rush job, there is a surprising amount of depth to the jokes and the layers to poking fun at the popular visual novel tropes in a 'if you know, you know' kind of way. It's both self-aware that it's presenting itself as a mockery of furry visual novels, but the amount of research and knowledge about them needed to accurately pin point the jabs let's you know that this was written by someone who cares about visual novels a lot.

I really have to appreciate the story and framing of this visual novel. It's established early that this is actually a story about a group of college students (film students maybe) who are shooting a movie in a month (game jam reference), and said movie is an isekai story about [insert protagonist name], a human, who is brought down into Duat (Egyptian underworld) because he's actually an anubis this whole time and now he's the Prince to an Anubis dad and he has to go to Anubis College to study and win his father's favor to become the new king because he has a younger brother who is also aiming for the throne. Following? It's okay if you're not, none of it actually happens, as there's frequent moments of fourth-wall breaking as the characters are fully self-aware of the caricatures they're playing as, straight up reading from scripts and poking all the holes in the plot and giving nu-gen quippy humor. No secret, this biggest parody this is of is Adastra, but there's jabs at other furry vns too, Lyre for falling in love with a knight who is assigned to protect you, I think one might've been Cho-Pro for the clothing choice scene, and I want to say the plethora of college based furry vns and this one just being another college setting. There's even a "cut to the final scene because we're running out of time" with a lot of funny bickering about how they have to skip over the sex scene, which is like, the most important part of a vn. The fact that there are three endings based on which outfit you pick, is hilarious, in that each of the endings is also like, just as entertaining as the last, as they all end in tragedy, but in their own unique ways. It even ends on a joke, as the drama is forced, there's a lack of any real weight to the finale, and it just ends with all the actors patting each other on the back sayin' how they might come back to film the missing scenes, but whatev cut to credits.

The presentation is nothing to scoff at either. Like, don't let the broken menu fool the particular craft in making it look 'this' busted. And even then, it's actually not 'that' busted. The character sprites are really good: jackal family, wolf knight, and the fox guy all are all expressive and give off so much character. The backgrounds are immersive, there's even some sketches of CGs for the ending, which is so good in conveying the whole "running out of time to finish this" running joke (happy accident that the 'image not found' made me laugh more than be annoyed). The bits where they have to cut the filming because something unhinged happened or they need to re-shoot a scene are always great visual gags. The audio does it's j*b what it needs to do.

I need to talk about the writing, because I both hate it, that's it's so grammatically incorrect and narratively 'wrong', but love that it commits to the bit so hard and consistently that I know that it's a conscious choice being made. I know you know how to write, because there are characters that do speak in complete sentences and times when the slang is left out. There is something so oddly refreshing about character's being aware of the tropes they're based off of. But also how each character, in spite of their dialog being full of slang, they each come across as distinct characters? And like, as actors playing characters too? There is so much vocabulary anachronicity that it's just a funny running gag at that point. Favorite bits and lines are "can't you see I'm trying to create conflict here" and "we've undergone like 0 character development" and "the past four years and five book/movies/visual novels".

This is really creative, not that parodies and false films haven't been done before, but how instead of making fun of a particular visual novel like some parodies have in the past, but like, pokes fun at the language of the furry visual medium as a whole. Pointing out the in unimportance of the protagonist's previous life yet how they keep reminding you of it, the absolute forced drama because a character is just overwhelmingly evil, the way that certain social structures like an aristocratic class and slavery has some stuff there that needs to be unpacked, and even the constant dunking on human characters. Funny enough, this fits really well in the folklore category being based on the Egyptian myth of Anubis and references to other literary works in here, so it's like, there was creative intent and this wasn't some fluke.

I'm going to say, looking at who is behind this (kaz and blacklight), I did not know that this collaboration would work so well, and I'm so glad that y'all put something like this together. Blacklight from those comedy chops that I remember from 'One Way or Another' and Kaz's unhinged prose waxing with 'First Winds'. Such a funny and new perspective on the contemporary visual novel scene, still putting together a somewhat coherent plot even if it was 'Adastra but with jackals', and just finding a way to make a meal out of every line. I don't know if Nu-Gen stylized comedies are going to be your go-to when you next make a visual novel or if you're going to branch out into other genres or try for another original story, but it's crazy how much improvement happened from the first game jam to this game jam. Keep workin' on that scope bloat and time management skills, y'all cut it close.

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'Wolf in Sheep's Clothing' is an unnerving suspense drama that portrays some heavy and serious subject matter through a deceptively innocent looking veneer. It's an interesting effect of having this type of story be told through the stylization of an simpler and cuter art style as it does throw the reader off balance once the first sting of dread hits and suddenly the juvenile presentation starts to show that there's a darker story being told here.

That being said, I think the story here is actually really intriguing and has quite a few layers of it. To speak plainly about the plot is to spoil the reveal, but I'd like to talk about it, so spoilers for those that haven't played it. The narrative angle is really strong. Having the main story be about a sheep girl who's been sexually abused by her older brother guardian and then using her to lure other girls for him to then sexually assault is a very intense premise (the 'wolf in sheep's clothing' being a predator sheep). There's a lot of really evocative moments that really sell the intensity of the situation. The way Mary dissociates a lot, the rigidity to her thought process, the absolute deference of agency to her brother, the culpability in assisting her brother, and even the resentment to the other girls that her brother targets. There's even a weirdly sinister worshiping of the older brother as he's introduced, which helps paint the picture that while his actions are reprehensible, he must hold a level of charm and charisma that he's able to get away with seducing Mary's classmates. The introduction of the folklore theme being the Greek gods, especially with Zeus and Hera as a not so subtle metaphor for this story, does help confirm to the reader that this is 'that' kind of story. What I find interesting as well is how Lucy changes depending on how Mary answers her question in the one branching choice. If you pick Lie, the story proceeds with the luring and seemingly 'lamb to the slaughter' type of scene where Lucy gets deceived, while on the Truth side, you find out that Lucy is aware of what's going on and isn't actually completely against being prospected. On the truth end, it feels like Lucy then takes pity on Mary and we find out that Mary actually doesn't care about the girls who get prospected, but that she's got this possessiveness to her brother and doesn't want to share with other girls. It's a surprisingly candid and tragic take on the story dynamic. 

The presentation, as simple as it is, is surprisingly effective at showing the disconnect between the seriousness of the subject material and the way the characters treat the subject material. The audio cues work well in giving that change in tension whenever a new detail is revealed, and it uncovers the next dark layer to the story. I do think that some more care could've been put into the transitions between scenes, as they seem to just flash in an instant, as well as the initial music coming in without any fade in, though part of me wonders if that's intentional or a happy accident that it adds to the choppy perspective of the main character who dissociates. I would say the same thing about the writing and prose, which feels very unrefined. There's some weird sentence structures, and a couple of places where it feels like there should be commas are missing and it ends up looking like run-ons. Once again, part of me wonders if this is intentional or a happy accident that it adds to the deteriorating and juvenile thought process that Mary has. While I think that the story ends at the appropriate point for each of the two choices, the ending does come very abruptly and that's what leads me to believe some of these choices are more like happy accidents that benefited the story. Adding in some kind of slow fade to back into a credit sequence or a sense of closure to the narrative leading into the end would help a lot in signaling the end of the story instead of the quick cut to the main menu.

Creatively, the thing that stood out to me the most was the audacity of tackling a story line like this. It's a touchy subject and could easily come off tasteless if not handled well, and I think you handled it with the appropriate amount of depiction without glorification. Otherwise, there's not too much else here to judge on, but I do think that the sprites for Lucy and Mary are very cute, and the backgrounds do their job of placing the characters in a setting. While I could see the folklore reference with the Greek myths, it does feel more like a foot-note, since it's not entirely a one-to-one metaphor with the Zeus story, since while Hera does punish the women that Zeus sleeps with, Hera doesn't actively help Zeus with sleeping around.

It's actually quite interesting, because I remember the author's previous game jam work, and that also dealt with mature topics. This one feels like an improvement in the narrative flow and letting the plot develop more naturally. If I were to offer some feedback, it would be to look into finding different ways to enhance the reader experience. Title page art, utilizing the visual medium more with different scene transitions or moving the character sprites around, playing around with the text visuals. On the writing end, looking into single line edits to see if there are stronger ways to convey the idea you're getting across. This was a surprising entry, and there's a lot of room for growth and potential, I would just like to be sure that there are deliberate artistic choices being made rather than it just working out for this particular story.

'The Games We Play' is an erotic romantic farce where a guy goes from getting cheated on by his ex to sleeping with her dad. It shines in both it's premise not being entirely porn-plot where stuff happens because it would be hot, but the narrative is spun in a way where I can believe where what started out as a revenge plot turned into an exploration of a man's sexuality. The erotica is also really well done as well, with some great moments of teasing and foreplay before getting into the big climax.

The story is cleverly constructed, especially on the character arc that Ezra goes on. He goes from straight guy trying to hurt his girlfriend who hurt him, to forging a friendship with her father, to questioning his sexuality and attraction to her father, to fully committing to his bisexuality. I'm familiar with a lot of older man/younger man dynamics in comic and art forms, so it's nice to see it also have a very nice visual novel representation. Framing the story and characters as a bunch of nerdy guys that are into DnD and LARPing also is a clever way to incorporate the pre-rendered sprite's costumes. All the characters feel like they are their own flavor of socially awkward nerd, which helps establish the bit plot misunderstandings and mishaps. The group encouraging Ezra to make it look like he's dating his ex's father, and then following it up with taking the picture because they don't know Ezra's started to be genuine is classic rom-com 'shoe-dropping'. All the story beats were good, though I feel like the LARPing section was the weakest, at least in terms of it being used as a filter for Ezra and Harvey to flirt and make their 'roleplay confessions'. Perhaps it was the self-deprecating nature of the roleplay, or the lack of a structure to it, where events just happened in order to happen. Even after the lowest point where Ezra goes back to the roleplay area, Harvey also just shows up as well, while a bit too plot convenient, I think there might've been a stronger choice somewhere in how to get the two of them back together. That being said, once the two of them are together is some really hot scenes which are the highlights of the story. You get a little bit of everything, from the solo jerk session, to the casual nudity, to the full on sex scene with a bit of dirty talk in there. Part of me wants feels like Harvey's role and personal motivation in the story does get a bit muddy, especially with how eager he is to spend time with Ezra in the beginning watching movies, fully putting on a revealing armor costume and then sharing a shower with Ezra, to so easily talking sexual advice, makes me assume that Harvey was also very much flirting and trying to get with his daughter's ex boyfriend, though never fully having him come out to say it. Then again, maybe that's just the subtext that I'm reading into much and intentional.

The presentation is serviceable, with the classic pre-rendered sprites on stock backgrounds and some really good usage of sprite movements and zooming into the right spots for immersive point of views. Audio work was also adequate, never feeling like it distracted and helped enhance the reading experience. The character voices really shined through the writing prose, with Ezra being that angsty hot-head and Harvey being the wizened and self-assured old man. As mentioned before, I think the LARPing section is the place where I felt the writing struggling to find a way for Harvey to find out about the revenge plot while also deepening the attraction that Ezra had for Harvey. The erotic scenes through? Great. I have no notes for how those played out, I thoroughly enjoyed them.  That being said, I do think you could've played around more creatively with the sex scenes. While I don't hate a straight-forward erotic scene of two men exploring each other's bodies, there was so many opportunities for some creative use of costumers in the sex scenes, or maybe some more sexually charged mishaps like the "can you help me unbuckle my cod-piece" moment. Let the nerds have some nerdy sex.

As for the folklore element, I think that might've been where you were trying to incorporate the folklore into the LARPing portion and didn't come off as strong as it could have. Trying to fit a folklore element into plot of what is a rom-com involving sleeping with a dad is a tall order, but I do admire the effort. Overall, this is a solid entry amongst the other game jam entries you've done in the past, and I'm glad to see that it indulges an erotic dynamic that isn't seen as much as others. Great use of the pre-rendered sprites as usual, though I could see the difficulties of trying to write a plot that captures all the themes and ideas into one visual novel. I'd say keep on indulging in your kinks and interests when making these visual novels, the passion shows and it'll attract the right collaborators into wanting to bring your ideas to the next level.

'Nat One' is contemporary drama that merges the fun and whimsy of a DnD group dynamic with a character's downward spiraling of self-hatred and depression. It captures the essence of a group DnD campaign with authentic accuracy, as well as feeling 'way to real' when it comes to the struggles of maintaining a friend group in your 20s (I assume). Does it lean a bit hard into the melodrama and some of the tropes of 'love and friendship will conquer all'? Yes, but that's also the point, and I appreciate it for leaning into it rather than trying to subvert it. Cause who doesn't want a story about the importance of leaning on others for support and trying to do everything on your own is sometimes too much a burden to bear?

The story is the story of Tyler, a dragon who just broke up with his boyfriend cause the boyfriend found a job out of state, and just lost his own job to AI, and now feels like the only thing keeping his life afloat is a DnD campaign which just ended early because of a bunch of bad dice rolls. There's this through line theme of the butterfly effect and how it centers around Tyler's mindset and world view, how end results are set into motion by actions taken a long time ago, and story likes to keep coming back to that imagery in order to really ground us in Tyler's perspective. It's such a depression-centered mindset because he's is both the cause for his own misery, but also denies himself the ability to control his outcomes and life trajectory. And then the narrative is just how life continues on and Tyler's framing of it, he contextualizes it within the DnD game (which is a campaign based on the King Arthur legend). His boyfriend leaving is contextualized as Lancelot betraying Arthur when they get the Holy Grail. When one of his friends can't make sessions because of a job or because they get pregnant, they're written out of the story Gandalf style or in a blaze of glory. When none of his friends can make the group, he does a solo DnD session where he wallows in his own despair. Of course, these are all just natural adult circumstances that come up or a string of bad luck, but to Tyler, it's a confirmation of his own inadequacies. Of course, in the end, it's when one of his friends reaches out and inserts himself into his life to show that he cares, is when Tyler gains the hope to keep trying and stop wallowing. It does help that said friend has been dropping hints that he's into him the whole time, so it doesn't come out of left field. Maybe it's cause I can relate to the story cause I recognize a lot of those emotions, but this definitely comes across as one of those wish-fulfillment stories and I just really like that kind of story. Who wouldn't want to be rescued from your despair and depression by a hot wolf in a pink hoodie? The final conversation with Tyler and Tristan does come off a little bit therapy-speak, but I don't mind that. I think I would just wish for Tyler to fight for himself a little bit more rather than it feel like Tristan is rescuing him. Like, yes, asking for help is moment of growth, but as Tristan puts it, he has to manipulate it out of him. Though, this is still a nit pick, and the ending as is, is already great.

For the presentation, it is spot on. It's a great mix of the pre-made sprite assets, custom sprite assets, custom background, photo backgrounds, the fun usage of a flapping butterfly, and all those bits where there's a focus on a particular detail, like the email (which is so well done in how much of a template it was that they didn't even put his name in there). The change from photo background to the hand drawn ones was really great, Sikyu did an amazing job with those, extra kudos to all the amazing painterly backgrounds that just immerse the reader even further. The music with the right emotional beats were great. All the little Ren'py tricks of sprites moving around for battle sequences, or the name plates for character voices are nice touches as well. The writing quality is also just top notch: the really realistic dialog, the way that inner monologue and dialog seem to intertwine, and even the memories, the thought processes, the reality and the game all seem to blur together and time passing in chunks as the situation goes from game session to game session. Each section doesn't seem to drag on, and the moments where a scene takes it's time is interspersed with comedy or drama to keep the reader engaged. I feel like there's a few repetitive parts, especially when depicting Tyler's deteriorating situation as he spirals, but I think that's just a creative choice to contrast the fun time with friends with the sad times alone.

Integrating the Arthurian myth as the folklore element was a clever way to tie together the folklore element with DnD themes the sprites had, along with the overarching themes of predestination or control over one's fate. Did I mention how well represented the DnD sessions were? The mix of banter of the players above the board along with the 'roleplaying' of the characters in the game was just fun to read. Plus, that's just a good representation as lots of table top roleplaying games are often remixes of existing myths and stories. The most creative aspect of this visual novel to me was the mixing of all the different levels of story. The internal story, the social story and the metaphorical story within the game itself. It really fleshes out Tyler as a character and you get a sense of not just his strengths but also his weaknesses and flaws. Each of the other characters also get a nice chunk to feel personalized, and it's only in comparison to Tyler that feel like Tyler could have spent more time conveying what he liked about his different friends. But once again, that's just nitpicking for the sake of it, I got the gist of what each one was about and their relation to Tyler.

I have to say, looking at the author's work, I am surprised that this is his first completed visual novel (I know that there's one in the oven cooking and looking good, but still not out quite yet). It's an extremely strong first impression, with a strong author voice in how they have characters ruminate and spiral. It did hit me when Tyler was doing his solo session and just beating himself up, so there must be something that he's doing right in his writing. If I were to give a bit more of an unwarranted feedback, I think the story could be stronger with a bit more highs to balance out all the lows that Tyler was facing. Maybe in a one step forward, two steps back kind of way, since every story beat seemed to just be a backwards step for Tyler. Maybe something like, doing something good and 'right' which makes him feel closer to his friends, only for real life to get in the way anyway, which would leave him feeling even more powerless in the face of his 'predestination'. But at that point, it's like, this already a really high quality story that I can foresee being one of my favorites this game jam, if not my favorite one. It gives me a lot of faith that the project you have cooking up is going to be just as banging.

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'The Wolf and the Holy Man' is what I think I would call a classic parable written in modern times but as if it were from the olden times. Especially as it is a story of a story from the point of view of a old Christian monk on the twilight of his life. It features several of the mainstays of religious parables, like the faith in the divine being, preaching forgiveness and understanding, the tragedy of life and death, and the basal nature of humans. It shows the friendship (and forbidden love) that the young monk has with a strange mythical creature, the anthropomorphic wolf, and how despite coming from two worlds, are able to come together and understand each other, only for them to part as it could never be.

The first thing that stands out about this story is the antiquated prose that it uses, with all the surprisingly archaic and religious jargon that I'm sure even some of the more seasoned visual novel readers would need to look up the definitions of. I don't fault it for that, because it fits the tone that this is going for, and it never hurts to learn some new words. That being said, the parable itself is quite simple, classic fear of the unknown and prejudice against those who are different, leading to tragedy, and that then festers into resentment and hostility. But there is also the aspect of the story that is of regret and longing. The monk is someone who has had a lifetime of good deeds and is considered a saint, and yet, even he has regrets over a love he denied for his own notions of sanctity, and it brings into question, whether or not such convictions would inevitably lead to this outcome, or if he were to have indulged in those forbidden feelings, would he be the same person. Part of me wonders if having the final scene with the wolf confirming the visions the monk had takes away from what could have been an ambiguous ending, where the monk is left with these regrets because he never truly knows what happens to the wolf, and if his visions were his cynical viewpoint manifesting. Then again, I also don't hate having the final line be a confirmation that while the larger population of the town hadn't changed, at least the wolf was changed by meeting the monk. Ah, to be spoiled by artistic choice.

The presentation itself is quite well done as well. I think this is probably the first time I've seen that filter on backgrounds actually work in the context of the story it's going for. The blur painterly style works great with this sort of religious parable genre, and having it also be told primarily through the NVL-mode makes it feel more story book quality than your traditional visual novel text box. The use of colored text to indicate who was talking was really good, though I wonder if making the silhouette of the guard red confused me for a bit when the monk's text is red and the guard is orange. Like is it the guard or does the monk just have a sword? Same with how the crowd text is yellow, but the silhouettes are in dark blue. Just some stylistic observations. I thought the minimal usage of ambient forest and waterfall sounds was very well placed and the music fit the vibe you were going for.  Even the bit at the end with the dream like distorted backgrounds was also a really nice touch. The surprise voicing monologue was unexpected and put a nice cap on the story. I think in terms of creativity, what stood out to me the most was the minimalist use of silhouettes and the commitment to the archaic vocabulary you used.

In terms of implementation of the folklore theme, this is basically a folklore tale in visual novel form, with the entire story being told from start to finish, which checks the box. The drawing from real life folk lore is also a really nice bonus point on top of that. It's surprising how much I was moved by this, but I guess that's just the nature of the dynamic of a doomed yaoi couple. This visual novel will have it's fans, but I feel like they're going to be the type who enjoy challenging reads and reading for readings' sake, rather than the subject matter of the story, but it seems like that was expected when writing this. Academic is a way I would describe this visual novel, the kind that is assigned via homework and enjoyed by literary enthusiasts rather than picked up for recreation by the layman. That said, I appreciate it's existence and feel like it brings a sense of dignity to this game jam.

'Trip to Tombstone' is a young adult angsty melodrama about a group of content creators looking for ghosts and the gal pals that come out to each other during it. It's got all the hallmarks of a classic sapphic romance: the deep history of being friends-to-lovers, the deep and quiet painful yearning from our main characters, and even the 'we have to share a bed' moment.  This is all done in the back drop of going ghost hunting on a road trip, which gives a neat lil artistic twist for when the main character is in her lowest state.

The story itself is your classic three event structure, with each act focusing on a different ghost/cryptid that the cast is trying to turn into content for Youtube, featuring Val and Trent as the faces of the channel, and Lilah as the camera/editor for the trio. The first act does a good job of setting up the stakes, of the inner conflict in Lilah as she grapples with confessing her love or potentially losing her friends in the process, and the distance she's creating is only making it worse. What follows as the go from cryptid to ghost, the feelings fester and build up, until the big confrontation and confession, the running away, the self-doubt manifesting itself as the cryptids showing up acting as Lilah's inner demons, and then a heart-felt resolution of 'she actually likes you back, dummy' moment. It's a solid through line, and the inner monologue captures the conflicting emotions that Lilah experiences. I feel like the effect would be stronger if you had given more of an trigger in the rising action portion, something that would give Lilah no other choice but to confess, instead of the overwhelming feelings that have been there the whole time. You could've also really added in the reasons why Lilah pines for Val and vice versa. She seems to complain a lot about her they have a penchant for getting into trouble and seem to avoid giving her attention in her eyes. But, it would be good to balance that out with the reasons why she still has feelings for her. Whether that be physical attraction or just personality compatibility, like she's pushed into an exciting life doing content instead of a boring classroom, or they were both weirdos that liked the same niche subjects.

The presentation is really cute and I love the bubbly art style for the characters. There's quite a bit of fun background and cg art, from the scary silhouettes, the wanted posters, and even the big reveal of the spooky ghost dream, really give a strong impact. The audio direction works for a spooky vibe, and the GUI is changed up so it's not just default. The bit that stood out most to me was the use of the overlay whenever Lilah was filming, with the blinking recording light, that was a really smooth touch that really heightened the experience. The writing prose itself was adequate, didn't have any trouble following the story and felt it was communicated well. As far as a creativity, I think it's a nice angle to approach the story from a content creator's perspective, showing the differences between being on and off the camera, though I feel you could've pushed that element a little bit more. As for the romance, it's nothing that hasn't been seen before, but that doesn't make it any less enjoyable to see it framed a couple of gals in a trailer on a ghost hunting road trip.

For the implementation of the folklore element, it's very apparent that 'turning folklore into content' is a strong angle to approach this from. You easily met the brief of it being based on folklore, highlighting several local folk tales from Arizona and I applaud you for that. Could it have been integrated more into the plot? Yeah, there something there that could be said about turning cultural history into consumable content for Youtube, and maybe that could've added an extra dimension to the romance/conflict between the characters. As a suggestion, maybe expand on how Lilah feels that Val and Trent aren't 'their usual selves' when they're on camera and maybe that relates to the treatment of these ghost stories and maybe leads to some thematic element of Val pretending to be someone that she's not which is what's upsetting Lilah in the first place. What I'm trying to get at, is that there's something there, so don't be afraid to cook a little bit more on your plots and character dynamics. Trent is there, so there's all the ingredients for a messy love triangle misunderstanding scenario.

While I see it's not your first VN, it is your first game jam VN, and I think it's a solid entry. Something that comes with the territory of game jams is scope, time management, and understanding what your own capabilities are. You picked out a premise that you were able to execute well, and even if it is another cheesy love story, that's kinda what this game jam is about, so I'm not mad at it. When you do your next VN, don't try to limit yourself, even for these contemporary slice-of-life settings. Try to find places where you can squeeze a little bit more drama and friction for the characters, so the resolution feels all the more sweeter in the end.

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'The Wolf Beyond the Table' is a drama the explores themes of forgiveness and accountability, at least that's my interpretation of it. It's a story about you (the self-insert reader) who has been absent from a friend group's DnD game night for an unspecified amount of time, finally coming back to join the group for a night of roleplaying and reconnecting. It tries to convey the ability that DnD and roleplaying has as a way to explore difficult topics, as the lines between reality and fantasy blur. 

The main plot seems to revolve around the relationship between the self-insert and the friend group. The main character grappling with their anxiety or self-doubt and the friend group wanting an answer for the lack of communication. Facilitated by the DM wolf crafting a roleplaying scenario where the self-insert can give their response through the vehicle of roleplaying. In a way, this structure gives a lot of control to the reader/self-insert to be able to craft their own protagonist's personality and story through the many menu choices that can be made to give a slightly different ending to this story. But, it does put a lot of responsibility on the reader, and the resulting endings are all fairly generic generalizations about forgiveness, patience, and the reconciling process. There aren't really any specifics to draw from for the self-insert character, which leaves the character interactions with the friend group feeling 'floaty'. The characters are all great and distinct from each other as they hold different attitudes towards the returning friend. The roleplaying scenario is also feels fairly non-descript as a result, with the fantasy story drawing from several common folklore tropes and details that, while giving a very evocative and colorful experience, almost come across as random and disconnected iconography. I feel like the choice to let the reader guide the emotional characterization of the self-insert character didn't leave you with much room to create stronger creative choices when it came to the plot line and the character interactions. In a way, this story is showing the resolution to a plot without knowing what the inciting incident is, and expecting the reader to imagine it for themselves.

As an example, the severity of the initial incident that caused the absence could totally change the flavor of this resolution. If the original incident was something minor and mild, then this story could come across as a melodrama or patronizing, while if it was something severe and intense, the story could come across as tragic but inspiring. And there are so many to choose from that could be an inciting incident: a disagreement that happened in the game, a fight that broke out from personal offenses, a rejection from a confession of love that made the whole table weird? Presenting this information to the reader would give them more of an informed choice when they decide the course of actions to take to reconcile the conflict. The choices do seem to follow the lines of being direct, collaborative, or avoidant, and those lines could still be followed, even with additional context given.

On the presentation, the visual and audio design are really well done. I could see that you picked out a fantasy template for the GUI and it was a very nice aesthetic choice. The extra bits of sound effects to emphasize little moments really help immerse the reader. The sprite work/manipulation was good, lots of expression changes and the extra detail to make the talking character be highlighted was effective. The writing description for the monster was also really good. The prose does a lot of heavy lifting, making sure to really capture all the senses it immerse the reader into this world. It makes sense, because in a way, this story is immersing the player in a story within a story. I will say that for a story about a DnD game with details about dice rolling, not very much of that happens. There are tabletop games that are more story focused and don't have as much dice rolling, so that's just a small thing I'd want to point out when it comes to constructing your plot.

As for the theme of folklore, instead of being about a folklore topic, it utilized folklore as a plot detail. You get the misty forest, the amalgamation monster, a children's song, the mysterious boat man, and stuff like a raven feather and torn book pages, which each could be it's own focus of the entire story. I do think that attempting to come up with a custom folklore tale was one of your stand out creative moments, as it did create a spooky and tense atmosphere. However, as each detail comes up, it's then dropped when the next chapter comes around. I don't hate it, since it conveys a character choice for the DM, who seems to like to just homebrew his own stories and made it specifically for the self-insert to have an opportunity to reconcile without it coming across as another argument. But it does take away from any identity this custom folklore would have.

As a first timer entry, I say this is a solid showing, with effective use of the pre-rendered sprites and use of common-use resources like the GUI, music and backgrounds. It was ambitious to provide three flavors of endings with the personality routes, and to weave a narrative to account for all three to end in a similar manner is fun. It's also pretty good writing to do the 'story within a story' approach and still be able to tell what's what without getting confused about what's happening. That being said, I do think that the choice to have the reader make the personality decisions really did leave the protagonist as a blank slate who never even explains why he is the way he is. It's okay to force circumstances on the self-insert and have the reader still put themselves into the character's shoes and asking them what they would do in that situation.

'RIP Normalcy', to me, is a contemporary one-scene drama about the disconnect between the terminally online and the terminally offline. It's a classic meet-cute location, a bar, and the where the main character, Wonder, deals with their first time doing something that they consider 'normal'. I think what intrigues me most about this story is how easily the dichotomy between the bar regulars and Wonder can be polarized. As in, depending on the reader's personal experience, will align with the online fox or the offline wolf and tanuki.

Wonder, always in their own head, apprehensive about how they come across, seeking the action of visiting a bar to fulfill a checkbox of saying that they've experienced it, without allowing themself to be authentic or vulnerable. Complaining that the drinks are expensive, the bartender is chatty, and getting hit on by bar patrons, and then wondering why they bothered to come to a bar in the first place (a very "I don't know what you expected" type scenario). On the other hand, the bartender and bar patron, despite their casual and filtered-less dialog, can come across as both cringy and somewhat vulgar, despite being genuine. The bartender hamming up puns, using internet lingo speak, and being a fan of painfully popular media products can come off almost patronizing or having an ulterior motive (to sell expensive drinks) and the tanuki bar patron being so forward and blatant about discussing sexual preferences (in a gay bar), could be seen as offensive towards an ace common talking points of 'how do you know if you don't like it if you never tried it'. In essence, what I take away as a reader is the folly/tragedy of the youth unable to embrace the vulnerability or honesty of pursuing a genuine connection face to face, as opposed to across a screen.

It's a well crafted scene, and efficient in the time spent establishing the characters and presenting the meet-cute. What would be a simple two character sprite combo conversation does get spiced up with the use of a phone cutaway to simulate watching a tik-tok video, which I think is a great demonstration of the ren'py tech and pretty creative. The use of the jam sprites was great, really taking the time to use all the facial expression in the conversation, and even changing up the sprites' colors for a personal feel.  I thought the choice of music was on point for a modern casual scene like this. The writing craft is competent and does well to get the point across, though I think there were a few tense issues in some of the sentences, something that could be fixed with a few extra proofreading passes. I do appreciate how each of the character's spoke with their own voices and there wasn't a lack of friction between the characters.

In terms of creativity, I don't think this visual novel is breaking much new ground with it's concept or presentation, but I do think it is portraying a moment in time in the time-scape of social interaction in the digital age, which makes it feel very contemporary. As for the folklore theme, my assumption is that this might be based on that sort of, 'back in my day' story that feels normal to an older generation but foreign to the younger one. Where to a digital native, meeting in person is a myth/legend. I feel like I might be stretching it to fit the theme, rather than it be easily apparent that it would fit into the theme of 'folklore'. 

I remember bored_kitty's work from last year's farce of 'RIP Me', I sense a style that they really gravitate to is with these really distinct ideas and visuals, as a snapshot of what could be a larger story. Perhaps that's intentional, as expanding on the themes in the stories might lose out on the impact of the sudden closure of the scene, but I think that moving beyond drafting a single scene is easily on the table for them. That or lengthening out the story, as if it were a bottle episode. This might also be a scope issue, and they're being conservative on what they feel they can accomplish in 30 days, but I have faith that they got it in them. Overall, very solid entry even if it feels like it cuts out before it gets too real.

"Wild Antler FM" is a meet cute romance featuring a young strapping moose and an old grizzled pine martin, that definitely goes into the steamy category. The appeal of this one is straight up hot large older guys with a lot of body fur. From that aspect, I think this visual novel achieves what it wants, and that's to set up some hot scenes with bulky men and have some really good CG art to accompany it. It's a quaint set up that doesn't challenge the reader too much, and there's only a hint of friction that makes it tough for these two to meet. The conversation between the two of them is entertaining enough, where they both get to geek out about computer stuffs, before getting naked and enjoying each other's bodies. The art for the CGs is really nice, and I will compliment the way that multiple artists were able to all stay consistent between sprites and CGs. As for the criticisms, it feels like the whole background of the park ranger for Rene was largely underutilized or even irrelevant. There's a few too many lucky coincidences for this narrative, like randomly finding Martin two times in a random town Rene went on vacation, the hitch-hiker lady also being an expert computer tech, or finding a yard sale/farmers market that had so many vintage computer stuff. I feel like Rene as a character wasn't explored too much, which might be to make him a blank slate character to self-insert into (also how is he 24 with that sprite art). It also ends rather suddenly after the final sex scene, would've been nice to have some kind of tying up after the climax. Overall, I think it's a hot set up and story, and let's hear it for the hot old man representation. 

"Mundilactes" is a dreary, haunting, weirdly supernatural/sci-fi horror choose your own adventure game. The art work is beautifully done, especially that opening sequence with the black substance taking the form of a deer. I think the presentation is extremely well done, especially with the vertical text box mixed with the icons for the different characters speaking. I don't think there was much sound/audio design, but I get that, the focus was on the experience. The plot itself is reminding me of a little bit of alien, mixed with fallout. The way that there's this contained society in a human-like space ship/facility, but with all the humans gone and so it's just these goop creatures that take the form of animals and crafted a society that involves venturing out into the rest of the facility to gather supplies as the doors operate on a timer lock. It's such a well crafted world that I have to give props to it. The adventure and plot aspect were okay, since while there's some neat revelations and twists that happen, in the end, there really isn't much concrete truths that we end up learning, and there's a lot left to try and read between the lines with. I do think it's a bold choice that you can actively choose to have your main character die and the narrative will continue without them, though I do wish that there were more of a character arc that could've been given to them. Like, they're a meek cowardly character, and even if you try to pick choices that would make them try to be bolder, that's what ends up getting them killed, so it's like everyone is static in this narrative. It's also kind of a shame that so much time is spent setting up the world, that it resolves so soon after the big encounter with the 'monster'. In an expected story structure, the low point is where the characters have a change of heart so they can have their comeback, but instead this one just ends at the low point. I suppose that's the effect that was being going for, this sort of dreary depressing vibe where they're just postponing the inevitable. Overall, really haunting experience, lots of fun with the branching pathways, and a neat world building, kind of wish I could say the same for the characters.

"More than just Gold" is a fun treasure hunting action thrill ride. This one is definitely giving action flick vibes along the lines of Indiana Jones, Uncharted, and 007, but with an interesting twist of just casually throwing in some magic powers just for the heck of it. The plot and action sequences with the main buck character Vincent were really well done and paced. He's got this rugged every-man treasure hunter vibe that makes you want to root for him and his 'noble thief' motivation. This is contrasted with, what I want to describe as the "manic pixie dream fox-boy" character that is Sep, and his aloof and carefree nature. I think it's interesting to have the majority of the POV be from Sep, in this way, because I really dislike his characterization. The pacing immediately stops and this becomes almost a psychological thriller, but from the killer's point of view. He comes across as misunderstanding normal societal conventions at first, but then it's revealed that he actually deeply understands these conventions, he just doesn't care about them, which leads me to think he's got a cognitive dissonance about his own actions and thoughts. While I think that it's fine that a character like that exists, the story is appears to be trying to paint Sep as the 'good guy' while all this is happening, thus the narrative starts to fight with itself on just what kind of tone it should have. The plot itself is also not complete, so maybe this was all in service of providing an arc for Sep to have? At least I should hope so and its not just some kind of power fantasy character. The inclusion of magic into the plot also feels weird when there's text in-story about how power-dynamic changing the concept of magic is, yet the story is willing to make that leap into the absurd. All that being said, the plot is easily followed, characters are distinct, and the presentation is serviceable, with enough new art pieces and sprites to become immersed into the story. The slight change in how you can respond in the plot is a nice touch, especially for a linear novel. Though, I hope that the rest of the novel is able to figure out what kind of tone and thematic through-line it wants to portray, whether it just wants to be a light-hearted adventure flick, or a more character driven introspective thriller.

"Bucks to the Demon" is a good old fashioned smut simulator. I've got a soft spot for this type of game. There are some minor game mechanics like managing money and resources, collecting underwear, and playing rock paper scissors, and a contrived set up to justify all the different and varied sex scenes. It's a nice way to get invested into the story and feel a bit immersed. That being said, it's a really contrived set up with clashing themes and tone. It starts out with a witchy horror type vibe, then goes into classic gay fantasy tropes like the gay bar and gym locker room scenes, only to come back with a surprising twist ending reveal. I can't tell what genre this is trying to be, whether it wants to be seen as a comedy, horror, or erotica. The writing itself is serviceable and the scenes are hot in theory, but there's quite a bit of overused cliche phrasing and one too many funny terms for sex parts. The game can get a little bit broken, as if you click 'work', you can just keep getting money as the number of days dips into the negative. I think there's also a disconnect, since the story says the reader only has 2 weeks to get the ritual, but the game just gives you 5 days. While I'm glad there's some pretty CGs for the sex scenes, there's a surprising lack of other visuals in the game, like sprites or backgrounds, especially since it seems like you've modeled the characters after the community sprites in the CGs, so it would be easy to incorporate them into the conversation bits. The smut is indulgent (good), but the framing of those smut scenes is lacking. I'm not sure about the choice of making the 'bad ends' be the ones that reward the player with smut art, it's makes the overall story just a bit too disjointed. The money mechanic was also a weird game play choice, as it felt arbitrary for how much money it would take to buy the needed underwear for the 'true ending'. I'd suggest either matching the story to the game mechanic choices, or having the mechanic choices fit the story. Like, if you were trying to 'steal' underwear, an idea would be to steal one from each of the coven members and each section act as a 'pick the right path' type of plot maze. Just an example for how to think about smut games you might make in the future. Overall, it's a good effort, and remember you can always find ways to polish up your final product. 

"Stuck in November" is a mystery tragedy wrapped up in a bit of amnesia ribbon. The neatest part of this visual novel is the art style, it's really good at evoking this haunting aesthetic. This story feels like one part mystery thriller, and one part self-fulfillment revenge fantasy, and one part saccharine catharsis fantasy, two extremes on a scale. As for the mystery thriller, I think that the structure and framing of the story is what hindered it the most. Starting off with the knowledge that the cop was the missing person's boyfriend, lessens the impact of his true motivations and in a roundabout way, undermines the story's own mystery. The memory loss reveal feels like more of an contrivance that also seems to go against the premeditation of it all. I feel like the framing of the mystery would've benefited without the knowledge of who the cop's true identity until the choice itself, when it really starts to take on a meaningful color to the cop's motivation. That being said, the two choices at the end lead to very extreme self-fulfillment fantasies. Personally, I found that the 'Pathetic' route made more sense in the grand scheme of things, as trying to create sympathy for the 'villain' in the final hour doesn't really land well. That being said, it's a well executed visual novel, with a lot of polish that went into it from the backgrounds to the sprite art, and the use of menus to indicate anxiety. Try to be a bit more mindful of your plot structure in future projects, cause it feels like all the pieces are there, they're just not in a very effective order.

"Let Lie" is a romantic horror, if that makes sense. It takes the question of 'Can robot's feel love', and brings it to a thrilling and suspenseful plot. The art direction is really stark and distinct. The gray-scale with bright orange accents really evokes this almost noir style. The contrast of this cold unfeeling setting with the warm glow of the expressionistic screen is ironic in it's ultimate use in the story. The story itself is actually quite intriguing. It leaves a lot to be read in between the lines and really makes the reader work for it. Something about over-reliance on technology to substitute for living connection. That being said, it gets a bit too difficult to parse, even in the opening poem of the novel, and it seems to get a little bit too ruminating as we seem to consistently circle back to Mal thinking the same thoughts, but never quite expanding upon them. I also don't get the ending. I'm guessing that this is overall a tragedy and the robots and their corporate overlords win? Mal decides that he's lived a lie and then it just ends? I think this is just a personal values thing where I don't understand creative decisions to have a story with an ambiguous ending without resolution. It'd be like if I finished my comment going "Overall, this visual novel-

"Mirrors" is a supernatural horror story, a classic ghost haunting. The thing that this reminded me closest to is like a Doctor Who episode. A colorful cast of diverse characters, dealing with a power greater than them, reality ceasing to make sense, and getting picked off one by one as hope is extinguished. A pretty good experience for those that are into watching and enjoying tragedy, the first chase sequence with Vic actually got me pretty good, the tension was really well placed with the audio stings. I will say, that the lack of agency that the characters had, and once the revelation that the characters had no chance, it became just morbid curiosity as to how the characters are done in. Its a little disappointing that there wasn't more to the ghost than what was presented, I was hoping it would be like a metaphor for something. By the end of the story, it was hard to continue caring about the characters when the horror is a bit too surface level and isn't all that fun. Like, what makes this kind of horror story fun is at least an illusion of being able to fight back, but this story just avoids any of that in the second act, preferring to indulge in the depressing tragedy of it all. The shift in chapters to the different points of view made it easy to follow who is experiencing what, but only so far as a third person perspective, as even when we get into their head spaces, there's hardly much revealed from it to add to the story. Overall, I think that there's the horror chops in here to make an effective scary experience, but it needs a bit more thought put into the character arcs to give it a bit more depth.

"Gravekeeper" is an action thriller visual novel, with a neat take on a supernatural plot. This one's got several fun details and ideas that play out like an episodic television series. I really enjoy how well the world building was done, the subtle mystery as to why this guy woke up dead in a morgue, the way the names changed from the protagonist's POV, the harsh attitude given to the protagonist from biased characters, only for said fears to be valid (even if they weren't justified). The action writing is also really good, I had an easy time following the movements and the descriptions kept the intensity. This is a really successful use of the provided sprites, the choice of having the smaller deer boy being an action hero is quite the fun visual. I didn't finish reading past the point of running out of visuals, because I think you did a really good job of crafting those visuals to enhance the action beats of the story, and I wouldn't want to rob the experience of the second half of the story with out them. That being said, I do wonder if there was going to be more of an overarching story plot, or if these were just going to be 'monster-of-the-job' episodes. The only negative criticism I want to voice is to consider your game's title. I get not wanting to give away a twist in the title, but also, for a premise as cool as this one, you should indulge in having the title reflect it. "Gravekeeper" is a bit mundane, maybe something cool sounding like "Wraith Hunter" or "Black Ashes". Either way, checking your profile, this looks to be your first VN project, and it's a really good showing, especially for a solo dev. I'm sure with this experience, you've built some skills in programming and time management to get to the finish line in better shape. I hope that you continue to update this project to let it get finished, and that you keep participating in these game jams. 

"Home" is an impressive feat of coding and programming, a proof of concept for a VN in a game boy. It's really on theme for this NovemBuck with the whole "retro-tech" thing, which is to actively create a VN that you'd play on a game boy. I'm in no position to judge the quality of the programming, since it's functional, and there's a charming simplicity to it, in the form of the pixel graphics and dither shading. I do feel like the text moved a little bit too slow, and with no menu, it just auto plays with scenes advancing via a button press. The demo horror story is also really cute, reading out like a classic creepy pasta that gets passed around on forums of old. While I don't feel like this is going to spur a wave of copycat game-boy visual novels, it's still a really neat project, and I give ya props for completing it.

"Drowned" is what I would describe as an unnerving horror short story. Like most horror stories, when reading it the first time, not everything is as it seems, and there's going to be twists and turns until you find out what the metaphor for the story was all along. I'm starting to find that it's a matter of preference and taste on whether a visual novel should answer all the questions it presents, or if it's better to allow the reader to do the heavy lifting, and this is a story where I feel it leans more towards the latter. My impression is that this is one of those 'metaphorical mind palaces' that happen right before a character is about to die (or is dead), a way for the character to unpack any thoughts and traumas before either surviving or dying. And unpack traumas is what this main character did. Whether the drama unfolding based around high school teenage gay melodrama was substantial enough to warrant such a plot or conflict, is going to be up to personal taste again. Personally, I felt like the drama and guilt that the main character felt wasn't fully explored enough, though I wonder if that leads back to having the reader fill in the blanks. That being said, that might be on purpose for there to be multiple interpretations. The one room design of the art and the perspective backgrounds/doors are really well made and surprisingly detailed, that's the strongest suit of this visual novel. Overall, very unnerving visual novel, and I think that's what you were going for, so I think you got what you were setting out to do.

"In Memoraiam" is a spacey science thriller drama story. I've currently read the game jam version, just for authenticity's sake and I found the experience to be really chilly and immersive. It's one of those 'stranded in space' plots, with a mystery element, missing memories and an unexplained death. The art is really well done, especially for all the backgrounds, the sprites, and the CGs. The music is mysterious and haunting, and while I got chills I never felt too overwhelmed by dread. The characters all have really well defined voices, and there's enough science jargon and explanation to make it feel more grounded. The mystery presented is also really well done, cause just enough information is given to string along multiple theories, and as new details are uncovered, more of what may have happened comes into focus. Leaving the game jam on a really stark cliff hanger is also probably the best way to leave a game-jam intro plot, cause it definitely leaves me wanting to check back in for updates. At first, I thought some of the jank of the VN might've been mistakes, but then after reading more, I'm starting to think they're on purpose, like, going from a the different POVs, from the 1st into the 2nd for the dream sequence, maybe to even hide some more details in revelations down the line. Overall, I found this to be a really gripping plot, even though it takes it's time in setting up the setting and getting a little bit too indulgent in explaining how the ship is run. Extremely solid preview/demo/first chapter entry, look forward to seeing it finished.

"Ventral" is a horror drama novel intro that seems to maybe be a little bit meta. This is an cute start to a horror visual novel, and not one that I see much of. Instead of going for the spooky monster route, it's going for more of a liminal corporate space aesthetic, kind of giving me Severance vibes. It does a good job of giving an interesting hook once it finally starts getting going, the idea of developing a game in competition with other teams in order to survive an uncaring monolith of a company. There's a funny detail in just straight up turning into furry people, which I don't hate, since it's a fun fantasy wish fulfillment type of thing, but perhaps with some plot relevance down the line. It does take a while to actually get to the meat of the story, the entire set up of morning routine and breakfast is largely filler and you could've started right in front of the company building.  I also wonder if this game is a bit of a meta-commentary about making games for a game jam, the whole idea of making games and having them compete for rewards. The sprite art is really cute, so I'm giving props for that. Overall, this a really nice intro that unfortunately had to contend with a time limit of the game jam, so there's not a way to see what the full vision would have been. Something that I had to learn quick is that writing the script for a visual novel is one of the top priorities if you want to get it done by the deadline, this'll give you experience for your next game jam.