itch.io

'Hopeless Showmantic' is a cute, light-hearted slice-of-life romance story the importance of having a mentor/senpai. I think what I really like about this one is that it's extremely influenced by Japanese slice-of-life animes, especially the ones following a plucky young protagonist that gets to reach his full potential through the help and guidance of an older and wiser upperclassman. It's simple plot and character arcs are just nicely done as you follow Seth navigate his college year joining the college acting troupe and try to compete to win the big stage-play competition. It's a little bit on the nose how it parallels a certain game jam, but I think it's a clever way to write a premise.

The story is nicely paced, as it spans the course of the year as Seth goes from barely failing out of college slacker, to finding purpose and a spark for acting as he joins the theater group. He does the auditions, he gets into the group, he helps decide and write the play, he becomes the understudy, there's in group drama, there the big moment where Seth has to step up as he's the understudy, and then he confesses his feelings for his senpai in a really cute way as senpai has to graduate. It does a lot in within the word-limit of the game jam, and if you're feeling that kind of anime-inspired feel-good plot, this one embodies it. I do think that it suffers a bit from focusing only on Seth and Benji, and we don't get to see the rest of the cast too much. Seth really sticks out as a great MC, with the most fleshed out character and motivations, while Benji can feel a bit flat as he's the object of affection to Seth. It might've been nice to have a bit more friction between the two, to help strengthen their bond and force Seth to have some character growth moments.

The presentation is very crisp and clean. I need to point out the really good typography in the title splash screen, it's really well done and makes it feel very professional. The UI is a bit of the classic Ren'py flavor, but adding in the phone bits and changing up the type help sell it as it's own unique VN. I dug the use of the act structure curtain calls to help show the passage of time. The character sprite for Benji is also really nicely designed and goes really well with the premade sprite. It really gels well and makes it feel like they were meant to go together. I have to also applause all the little details in the sprite work, like how the little anime emotion bits would be accompanied by a lil sound effect, like when Seth would sigh or have that sweat-drop when he's nervous. It's all just super cute and charming in a way that shows a particular attention to detail, and adds in so much customization to an otherwise stock sprite. The writing itself is done great, I was able to follow the story for the most part, and the dialog and was really nice. I think that the actual play that they did, did kind of feel like a bit of an afterthought, since having to write a story within a story is asking for a lot, but it served its purpose of making the world feel real. I kind of wish that other sprites could've been used for some of the other side characters, since there are some other sprites to use, but I also understand the vision of not wanting to clash the visual cohesion of the sprites already. (Plus I know each sprite adds a lot of development time.)

The folklore aspect was clever, making it the topic of the acting festival thing, so it was technically incorporated into the plot, but didn't really have a thematic relation to the overall story. It might've been fun to frame the folklore story that Seth is obsessed with as a parallel to his own character arc, to really hammer in how much it means to him. Surprisingly, this VN stays very clean. Aside from some boxer-shots of the main character, there's not any eroge or hentai, which I'm not mad at, but might've been fun to play into some of those anime tropes a little harder. Especially for a romance-type plot, the romance was very light, almost brother-like. Nothing wrong with that, just pointing it out.

Overall, I had a lot of fun with this visual novel. It's a light and refreshing finisher to what is otherwise a very intense list of visual novels that I've read this month. I'm a bit peeved that this was a late submission, cause I really think this would've gotten so much attention if it had been submitted by the dead-line, but I also have to commend for still submitting it past the deadline and not letting ya be discouraged. A lot of folks would get past the submission date, lose motivation and leave the project unfinished, but you stuck with it, and that's worth praise. It's a very strong showing by Jin, especially for a first time visual novel, the strongest points being that graphical design and artistic aesthetic. The writing is good, if a bit safe, and you could really put out some show stoppers now that you've got a handle on the time management and scope creep elements of the development process. This one is gonna be an underrated entry (since folks can't rate it, lol), but this one I think is worth a read and would've easily scored high in the rankings. For what it's worth, the ratings I would've given this VN are [3/4/4/4/4]. Great job!

'Bearer of Sin' is an adventure drama story that deals with nearly the ultimate list of heavy topics with no easy answers. It presents itself with several questions, "Are all people worthy of forgiveness? When is it okay to take another being's life? Where is the line of morality and ethics when the world is indifferent to such concepts?" It then starts to present several scenarios and characters that test the limits of this priest's understanding of his faith and his purpose as a healer.

To go over the story is to frame it in these scenarios that test Julius's faith and stances on morality. He's sent on a mission to help a village with a curse, the village of wolves has a history/folktale that they were originally savage beasts that then eventually were saved by a white wolf and that wolf's tears then blessed the well of water to help keep everyone healthy. The first test of Julius is the village chief, who has undergone a terrible monstrous transformation by either an illness or a curse. Fearful that there is no known cure, and that it could possibly spread, Julius has to determine if it's the right thing to do to kill the chief to put him out of his agony and to prevent the spread of the illness, or keep him painfully alive in hopes that he can be cured without knowing if it is possible. It's then revealed that Julius's former mentor had killed himself, and he has to grapple with whether or not his mentor should be forgiven for taking his own life. Then in one of the routes, his templar companion Solis, guides Julius to his former home to reveal that he was horribly beaten and disfigured as a child by his father, and whether it was right to forgive his father but not to forgive himself for killing him when he was older. Then in the other route, the flower shop lady wolf, Lillia, (who is also the chieftains daughter) reveals that as a woman, it was her job to groom young girls to prepare them to be used as prostitutes/sex slaves to the men in the village (as that's what the culture considered fine to do), and if it was right for her to kill her drunk fiancé who was about to force himself upon a young girl. Then it turns out that the village shaman, Engil, was purposefully about to spread the curse through the well water because the village was so corrupt allowing all these atrocities to happen and not do anything, that it all needed to be purged and he see to it personally. Engil was stopped, they cleaned the well water, and then there's a small epilogue where Lillia goes to help out with the church, and Solis and Julius have an option to be together. Let's just say, that this plot had big ambitions, and the scope and story seemed to get wildly out of hand.

Let's go to some lighter moments, the UI is really cute, and the sprites and character designs are adorable. Each one is bursting with personality, and each one just helped add to the intensity of the story subject matter. Solis is best boy, such a sub to Julius's dom, and you can tell there's a real intention with their dynamic in the story. Lillia is great as a complex and well rounded woman character, with so many facets to her, and the way her character is revealed is great. Engil comes on a little bit too strong, like, you immediately know he's got something up his non-existent sleeve and is just so smarmy and antagonistic (talk about unsubtle). Gonna say it, and yeah, time limit got to ya, and it shows, with the second half of the VN not fully coded, and a lot of missing editing passes. But, hey, at least you know you just need editing passes to fix the grammar stuff.

The folklore aspect is also a little bit on the lighter end, but it is there, just not as strongly developed or implemented into the story. It seems there might've been something of a pagan vs established religion angle that wasn't fully explored, but I did enjoy the mythology around the village itself. This story is really creative, and I will say, you took a big swing in tackling so many heavy topics all in one VN. The drawback is that there's not really a good discussion to be had, or to let each of the scenarios breathe for the actions or inactions that the characters made. I'd imagine that one of the plans was to give options to the reader for making these hard choices, thus being the 'bearer of sin'. Perhaps the true test of morality is less in picking the 'most correct' option, but to pick an option in the first place and then stick to your convictions. Even so, to have the visual novel then try to land on a 'this is the right choice, here's a good ending', does feel like it starts to lead to so equally difficult writing.

So, nice to see that SpesBringer is back again with a story that deals with intense heavy topics. And even if it is a bit sloppy around the set up and resolution of these scenarios, the fact that it's being tackled so openly and bluntly is commendable for the gumption it takes to do so. You probably bit off more than you could chew, and so time management and scope creep is something to be aware of in future projects. You do have some really good ideas in here though, all three is a bit much for a game jam game, especially one that branches out so early, that the Lillia and Solis story lines almost feel like two different VNs. I would say to keep in mind your narrative structure, that all the elements are helping support the theme of your story. Valiant effort, there's a lot put in here, scope just got away from you. That being said, it's still full of interesting ideas, and just needed more time to cook. Don't take this as a discouragement, I still loved a lot about this.

'By the End of the Night' is a romantic drama, close to being a bottle episode, where the complexities of love and desire are brought head on to see how it fairs when prejudices show up right at your door. In a way, this story feels like a story about authenticity and how people can say that they appreciate it, while also shunning those who dare express it in a way they don't like. People will accept alternative lifestyles, until that alternative lifestyle is what they themselves may now be associated with. Do they grin and bear it, or do they swallow their pride so they do not have to be labelled a hypocrite?

The story starts off with couple Federico and Anna going to visit a friend, Raimondo, so they can get an exclusive tour of a villa, and potentially be granted a wish from the sprit of the villa. It's a lot of ambiance and learning about the reasons that Fede and Anna are going out, as well as the existing relationship between Fede and Raimondo, but it all becomes clear that the reason that Fede even bothered to make a big deal about this wish was because he wanted to come out to Anna as bisexual, and was hoping that Anna would not be so upset that she's break it off. Well, Fede's anxiety was justified, because Anna takes it just about as well as any 'homophobic trying to cover up that they're homophobic', and immediately resorts to insults and appeals to traditional values. Fede is distraught, and does some introspection, and realizes that she was right in that he and Raimondo had been intimate, but he'd never fully cleared the air of that awkwardness with him. Raimondo is understanding and completely forgiving, allowing Fede the grace he needs to forgive Anna as well as keep Fede as his best friend. Anna on the other hand, has a talk with God, and I think also finds out that the Lady of the Villa actually had a different lover, and was always sad that she had to have a facade, and I think she equated that with either herself (having to be with a bisexual even though it disgusted her) or Fede (being in a straight relationship despite also having gay attractions as well). That part kinda got a bit muddy for me what Anna was thinking, because she also decides to go back to Fede and tell him she loves him. And that's where it ends. Honestly... I'm not actually sure what to think of this ending. I think it's supposed to be hopeful in that Fede and Anna were able to overcome this hurdle in their relationship. Fede is able to compartmentalize his gay into a different box and repress it. Raimondo is fine being the gay best friend. Anna gets to be a... wife, potentially? It's messy and leaves a lot of unresolved thoughts and issues, which I guess didn't need to be answered? Maybe there's a lot of subtext which I'm just not media-literate enough to catch. Which is quite funny considering Fede tried very hard to be clear about explaining his feelings to Raimondo. I guess this makes this kind of story 'mature' and 'adult'? Maybe it's pointing out the hypocrisy of folks who put on an air of being an 'adult', yet still acting as if they've been children this whole time? The childish acting character is actually emotionally mature, while the adult acting ones are emotionally immature, kind of way. I feel like I'm really reaching for that kind of explanation and twisting the narrative to make sense in that case. There's not always a clean ending with a satisfying resolution, you just kind of... have to deal with it?

The presentation is amazing, the artwork and character designs are charming and super expressive. I got what the vibe was going for when it came to using all the photos for the villa, so that didn't bother me. I think the lack of any music ended up being coming much more noticeable when there were all the extra sound effects happening. Maybe adding some music, especially during flashbacks, would help to delineate those sections more. The writing was alright, and I appreciated the changes in the text box for when the POV changed between Fede and Anna, though I thought it was odd to give Anna a full schizophrenic moment when she was talking with the art sculpture (maybe playing for laughs?). I did think each character had a distinct enough voice, and were fairly consistent throughout the story.

The folklore aspect was cute, and I guess made for a really nice backdrop to shadow the main relationship drama. Though, with this being a more soap-opera type of plot, and being far more grounded in reality than what was let on, I guess I'm more annoyed with the promo material and descriptions leading me to believe this would be more supernatural in nature. I can only guess that with the three people there, and all three made a wish, but only one of them stayed in the villa till midnight, Raimondo, then that would mean that the wish Raimondo had was that Fede and Anna would be happy together, and that's why it seemed to just wrap up the way it did in the end? Though, then I feel like I'm the one who's imposing my thoughts into the story, and I know that I have had a bad track record of understanding some of these plots.

Overall, it's a surprising collaboration between joelurker and loudo, with sikyu giving some amazing CGs and sprites to a story that ends up feeling carried by it. The strengths I think in the writing are very much the micro-interactions. Those little character conversations between Fede and Anna, and Fede and Raimondo, that feel really authentic and genuine. The way characters have a difference in the way the say things, but really there's an underlying thing that they are saying. A particular way of choosing words, not lying, but also not being fully transparent. The little character moments as they interact with the house. But, I think the story seems to struggle in what message it's trying to convey, if it has a message it's trying to convey at all. Maybe it's just the straights melodrama of it all.

'Dark Water' is a fascinating surreal dramatic story about isolation, introspection, and communication between characters of two completely different worldviews. What intrigues me about this work is how it's a very simple and effective it is with it's presentation, yet manages to conjure a story so wildly fantastical, but somehow relatable. Just how can someone be able to make a connection with someone so alien to them, have nothing in common, yet the connection be so strong, that the loss of that connection is enough to drive someone to a desperate end. This is a story about stagnation, impossible dreams, and despair.

The story follow an angler fish. Said angler fish exists like angler fish do, luring prey with it's light and eating them, but confined to the depths of the ocean, has never seen the sun, save for the singular time it saw the sun when it was born. The angler fish finds a phone. The phone lets it talk with a wolf in a forest, practically in another world away from the depths of the ocean. The two talk, about life, about each other, about what it means to want something that would destroy you, and the value of friendship and connections with other persons. The wolf having a more cold logic, the angler having warm skepticism. Despite how much the wolf seems to dislike having to deal with the angler, they stay on the line because they're curious. The angler, somewhat hurt by the coldness of the wolf, still stays on the line because it's a portal to a wider world than one he knows, that there is hope, that while he may not be in the sun, he can go other places than the emptiness of the ocean floor. While the wolf says he is not a friend, to someone so alone, even that is enough. Yet, when tragedy strikes, he's attacked by a luminous eel/fish, the phone is broken, severing his connection to the surface world. With no way to repair it, and with no knowledge of how to obtain another one, or even if he were able to find the wolf again, he swims to the surface, to see the sun, even if doing so would end in his demise. It's a profoundly tragic story, and one that such a minimalist and unassuming visual novel is surprising to find within it. It makes one reflect upon oneself and how they can relate to the angler fish. I interpret it through the lens of the phone, and through long distance communication with others you just randomly find online. How much we take for granted that we are able to forge these connections, how there are going to be such stark cultural reference points similar to the angler and the wolf. How a phone can offer a portal to a place that is a beacon of hope, a wider world that while may never be reached, the knowledge that it exists and the potential to go there is never zero percent.

The presentation is quite effective, with it mostly being a dark swirl of colors of the ocean depths, the way that lights cut through it. Even more noticeable when it goes from dark colors to pure black. The art is pretty cute too, with it being a surprise when the cell phone pops up with the reflection of the angler fish guy. Or the jump scares when the fight breaks out with the eel/fish and even in the beginning when the angler also eats another fish guy. In a way, I almost thought it was going to go in a vore-istic direction, but really, it's to punctuate how even before the discovery of the phone, angler was simply doing what would he would be the victim of later in the story, never giving thought about the lives the fish he eats. Even more punctuating how he himself also just gets drawn to light sources, when it could easily become a trap and he'd be dinner too. The writing is surprisingly descriptive, with a lot of variety when it comes to prose. Going from punchy short descriptions to experience the intensity of a situation to the long drawn out conversations between the characters.

The folklore was a little bit on the weaker side, presenting itself as the angler fish making up their own folk lore tales about what the sun is and anything he could do to keep those feelings alive. In a way he was creating folklore, but I feel since it was so internal, it's hard to also convey the part about folklore being that it should be shared. This story is crazily creative, with quite a few ways you could interpret the text, going for the surface reading or trying to see it as more of an allegorical sense. Would never have thought that I would be so enamored by the plight of an angler fish. The writing almost coming off as poetic. Even that one moment where it looked like the angler fish had a choice, but it cut off so quickly that it even denies you that choice. Such a tragic story that once his phone was broken they even tore off their own light, it wasn't enough.

For a first showing by GatoRon, I'm pleasantly surprised by how much heart this visual novel had. There was enough polish in the art and the over all design that was really efficient use of the limited art assets. I will say that the dialog between the wolf and the angler fish started to get a bit verbose as the philosophical discussion seemed to drag on. I did like how it was interrupted by interesting tense moments, like the wolf having to get out of the sun or the angler getting attacked, since if these things didn't happen, it would be a lot of quiet moments and bordering on getting bored with the narrative. There's also a lot of mystery as to what exactly is happening, but I think with the way this story is presented, I didn't think about it that much, since end up hand-waving a lot of the justification for the premise, so I continued to do that when it came to the logistics of how this world works. If that wasn't the intention, then finding a way to ground it would need to be more of a priority in the intro. Overall, it was a charmingly dark and moving piece of writing, and I feel like I'm seeing a lot of technical skill here that would easily translate to other genres. Looking forward to more from this developer/author.

'To The Noblest End' is a romantic drama about the perils of war and battle, the stories that we tell ourselves to find motivation or hope, and how even love can bloom on the battlefield. The story is tightly knit, with a lot of lovely character friction, character drama, all of the dramatic backstory reveals, and even more dramatic hot love-making scenes. I thought it all blended together wonderfully in a package that sees these unlikely members of an army, from different walks of life, come together to find meaning in each other, saving themselves from their lonely lots in life.

The story starts in the middle of a war, from the POV from a field medic, Raf. He meets with a mercenary wolf, Ulfor, and a young officer, Aella, and things do not start well for them. Raf is a raven and Ulfor is a wolf, two species that are considered more on the outside of society, while Aella, an eagle, is known to be from the upper crust. There's so many great moments that describe who they are, Raf with his flower crown, Ulfor always carrying his sword, and Aella with a proud bravado. Aella is tasked with improving morale among the troops by going to fraternize with them, which Ulfor immediately sees through as Aella being put through his paces. Lots of animosity. As the war goes on, eventually, Aella confronts the slights against him by Ulfor, essentially Ulfor perpetuating stereotypes that he himself has been subjected to. That puts their friendship through a restart, as now everyone in this throuple is having little bits of moments where you can read that they're all developing feelings for each other. This all comes to boil over when tending to Ulfor's wounds after a battle, Raf and Ulfor start getting frisky, only for Aella to walk in, and then join in. I really loved that this moment gave way to the throuple plot, instead of the love triangle. And then as they've now all agreed to this trouple idea, Ulfor and Raf can tell their sad backstories, and then decide to strive to live for tomorrow. The war is over, and a fake out again later, the three are all working domestic lives in a city. Also love that it kept me guessing on whether the outcome was going to be a tragic one or a hopeful one where we don't know which characters die or live. I think this does the happy ending right, in that it had kept me guessing until all the characters were showing up in the epilogue, which means it really could've gone either way.

The presentation is off the charts, with ImRikun and their amazing menu ui's just give this visual novel such a polish that it's crazy to think how much a game is elevated by something that looks simple, but I know takes an experienced hand and eye. The art is also amazing, with CityofSneps pulling out really stylized character sprites and PinkNarcissus giving some amazing CG spreads, especially the really hot sensual scenes. Lots of strong dynamic color choices, and difficult perspective shots, definitely worth all the praise. The writing is also really amazing and tight.  Deepbluefeeling taking their previous experience and just refining it even more so. The characterization is really good in making each one have a point of view and a distinct personality from the others. The transitions from scene to scene, each individual moment of adding levels of detail and character, even the way that the folklore tales are interwoven into the story. It's all just elevated from their previous one, even keeping the pacing surprisingly good, making sure to show all the big moments and still find the right spots in the story to do backstory reveals. I feel like Raf's backstory could've been revealed a little earlier, just to help spread each character's backstory, but that's just splitting hairs.

The folklore aspect is great, not only referencing so many tales that it'd be difficult to recount each one, but also the use of them as the way folklore tales are used, as a way to bolster resolve and to understand each other. Lots of very clever call backs to the folklore also in each character's backstory. All of them so terribly tragic. This is crazy creative, from presentation to even tackling certain themes, like, making a throuple plot make sense to me. It's very difficult for me to come up with a constructive critique, since I think every element of this project was done to their highest potential. I'd even be hesitant to say that I would like 'more' of this story, since I feel it was trimmed up nicely to where the essentials were left as needed. Obviously, since they're all in a battlefield in a war, it's difficult to find places of 'downtime' where the characters are allowed to explore other facets of their personality that aren't strictly business, but it works in the context of a game-jam with a limited word count.

Overall, this is an amazing showing by this team of heavy hitters. Strong story and direction, amazing art and UI work, adherence to the theme and still making it super hot as a my-wolf visual novel? Check marks on every box, full points, 10s across the board. It's a tight cast, with only three characters, all of their topics are interpersonal drama, and yet you can feel the world still exists around them. Sure, it's often filtered through their experiences, but there's enough back and forth show they're bonding through telling tales of themselves to each other, and through their protection of each other on the battlefield. Yeah, can't say the praises enough, super good visual novel, looking forward to more of the work this team and their members will get up to.

'Crimson Creek' is a fun, light-hearted, slice-of-life cryptid mystery adventure game. What impressed me with this entry is all the work that went into making this into a pseudo-adventure game, where you have elements of clicking on the bigger screen looking for clues, pulling up menus to ask characters about specific topics, and have the option to exhaust dialog trees to find little gems of interactions. It really helps immerse the reader into what is a fun little monster/mystery story.

You've got your protag duo, of Trent and Shane, couple of ghost hunter boyfriends. Trent's trying to do a youtube channel, while Shane's being supportive. They're headed off camping and coincidentally looking to get proof of the jersey devil. Shenanigans ensue when they're pretty sure they ran into the jersey devil when they were driving in. They start doing the camping activities, when they run into several colorful characters who are all affected by the jersey devil in some way. Trent and Shane have a bit of a fight when Trent is upset that Shane isn't as excited about hunting monsters as he is. They go in the middle of the night, and oops, turns out they got attacked and Shane saves the day. Also, somewhere in there, Trent and Shane go skinny dipping and then have sex in a stranger's house because horny, and I'm all for that. To be serious, I do think that while the idea and vibes of the visual novel of amazing, the story itself is rather... happening because the script says so? I mean in a way where scenes are leading into other scenes, not because the characters are following a set of clues that lead them on this mystery, but because a character shows up and is here to take them to the next location and info dump their backstory. I can understand that Trent is willing to go along with anything to get his scoop, but it's more like Trent is allowing the plot to carry him along than have it feel like it was going from one thing to the next thing naturally. Mac and Abigail seem like tutorial NPCs, if that makes sense. Sofie showing up by riding into Trent, feels like there was a note in the script that was 'Sofie is here' and there was no better way to incorporate her into the story. I think what I'm getting at is that there's a slight issue with structure and the set up, where it all feels to happen-stance instead of something the character's are actively pursuing.

The presentation is the game's strongest point. The GUI and the way the menus work make it a really nice set up for an adventure/mystery game set up. The characters are all well designed and really show off their personality. The main guys are also hot, I'm glad that this story takes time to remind the reader that this is in fact a my wolf/romance with a lil bit of smut here and there. I will say that I took a lil bit of issue with the dialog trees, where you have to continuously click the same choice to exhaust the information in that. Maybe something like a graphical indicator, like it's greyed out/line strikethrough might help in showing the player that a choice has no further progress, instead of randomly clicking it each time to see if something different happens. The art is really good, and the audio I think it pretty alright too. It makes for an immersive experience. The real life photographs mixed with the drawn clues was also a fun touch. I will say the writing is adequate, in that I understood what everyone was saying and how the plot was going. I think I got a lil confused when the POV changed from Trent to Shane halfway through, but otherwise I saw what you were going for. Maybe for an adventure game, some kind of graphical indicator which character you're seeing through.

The folklore aspect I really enjoyed, especially learning so much about the Jersey Devil, and the connection to a cryptid hunting youtube series. I like that it was a direct hunting of the jersey devil, going into the area that it was spotted and then just straight up looking for it after a guy has been tracking all the missing persons. Plus, I like that this story straight up confirms that it's real, and not some kind of conspiracy to a different plot. I feel like this was a fun and creative entry, with a couple neat twists and turns in the plot, but mostly in the framing of a mystery game. This kind of format would be great to use for other projects you may work on.

Overall this is an extremely impressive showing from HollowFox7, especially for a first time visual novel and game-jam entry. There's so much to like about this, and there's so much work and effort put into making the game run as smoothly as it did (the only hiccup being a soft-lock that is still able to be circumvented). From the art assets made, to the coding, to the writing, I'm blown away that it was done by a solo-developer. There's definitely room for improvement, mostly in the conceptualizing and writing-structure stage, but everything else is surprisingly top notch and well polished. I could definitely see the developer getting swooped up as a team member for future projects, or just continue getting better at solo developing.  I'm looking forward to more stuff this guy puts out.

'Everyone Is Asleep' is depressing.

The folklore was pretty neat with the whole setting being the Bermuda Triangle thing going on. The presentation is the classic Carrioff style of grey scale two frame jiggle, with a bit of yellow/orange for contrast. There's a lot of nice moments visually that striking yellow on black, the two moons, and the whole ocean waves in the dark thing going on. The writing is written in a way that I can read it and understand the words. Writing a story about spiraling depression and suicide through metaphor and symbolism, very creative.

You made another one, good job.

'Pyrena' is a drama/thriller/slice-of-life type story with a lot of heavy topics and bold choices in plot and art direction. I think what really gets me about this visual novel is that it's got such a strong hook. Right off the bat, we're hit with lots of details and mysteries, presented in such a natural way that it entices the reader into wondering just what the events of the past that led up to this mundane moment are, and also wondering just what this is all going to be leading up to. Whether it sticks the landing on reaching a satisfying or unsatisfying ending I fear may be up to a reader's personal taste and their overall stance when it comes to nihilism and trying to find meaning in suffering.

The story follows Bird, a fox guy who's working at a convenient store with his friend Harper. It's fairly slice of life and a lot of internal monologuing about how suicidal Bird is, mostly because of some undisclosed detail about his past, and how he's currently got an ankle monitor on him. After a tense confrontation with a cop in the store, strange things start happening around Bird, as he contemplates his past and whether or not it's worth it to continue living this type of dreary lifestyle. There's lots of hints at something so messed up and bad that has put him in this state, that he can't even bring himself to talk about it with his best friends, family or confidants. Then said friends and confidants start to go missing, and it turns out that Bird's past has caught up with him. The big reveal is that when he moved away from his hometown, cause he's gay, he started hooking up/dating a guy he met at a club. They eventually broke up, very messily, and it's cause of something to do with boyfriend's asshole cop father who Bird has 'no idea what he's capable of', which I think leads to cop dad finding him, and framing him for some kind of crime, (I think the murder of his boyfriend/cop's son?) and that's why he's in this situation. Anyway, there's a big deer monster which is an eldritch entity of his former boyfriend, who I think is seeking petty revenge? I think the cop is too? Anyway, there's an action sequence, they find the missing guys, the boyfriend(?) monster bites off Bird's hand and runs away. Bird decides that life is worth living because Harper has been sticking by him this whole time. Okay, so, I can respect the intention of going for a more bleak vibe in a story, but while I think this visual novel gets a lot right in setting up the situation, I think it loses the plot when it comes to putting the pieces together in the second half. The cause of all the dreary-ness comes across as weirdly disproportional to the situation and vibe, and it makes it seem weird that Bird acts the way that he does. Like, while I can imagine that he feels somewhat responsible for his current situation, instead it seems to focus on the general helplessness that Bird is facing. Yet, the resolution doesn't seem to align with that character arc that Bird is going through. Like, is he still stuck on his old boyfriend as he felt he ended it on a bad note? Is this situation an act of self-flagellation? Surely, if Bird's crime were bad enough, some kind of information would be known by someone other than himself? While I can excuse unexplained phenomena when it serves the emotional core or themes of the story, I don't know what the monster attack had to do with the story. I think that the dad is doing some kind of ritual to bring his son back to life, and is using Bird's friends as the sacrifices? But like I said, it kind of loses the plot for me and I just end up confused by the end. Thus, the story kind of ends where it starts out, with this overwhelming feeling of hopelessness and pointlessness to all the suffering that Bird is going through.

That being said, for all I didn't know what was going on with the story, the presentation is amazing. Like, so many great visuals, strong iconography, the character designs are fun, and just the elements of animation just give it such a vibe. The way the little comic panels pop up to highlight important details, the way we get a first person view of bird has he looks at himself in the mirror or is cutting vegetables. Even the scenes where the dad is doing some shady stuff, just give so much while looking so simple. Changing the hue from blue to red, just comes with such an impact. The writing is also quite nice, especially in the beginning when all of these really strong statements start the story off. All the ruminating and spiraling is great, and the dialog is natural and engaging. I think it starts to veer off into melodrama, but that's just related to how I lost the plot related to my previous statements.

The folklore aspect I think is supposed to be this tradition about separating a peach pit, so two halves of a couple could always be connected. I thought it was a cute detail and I think was supposed to be a major plot device for the story, but it kind of... didn't? In fact, the folklore detail comes in pretty late in the story and then isn't actually all that important to the story, so it does end up feeling tacked on. I think though that this is really creative, at least in terms of tackling some really heavy stuff, and willing to swing big in plot choices. It feels like this story started out wanting to swing bigger, but ended up pulling it's punches in the second half. I kind of wanted Bird to be, ya know, actually guilty of something significant. Instead of a story about living with the pain of knowing you did something terrible, it's more of a story about how unfair and uncaring the world is and the helplessness to fight it. I feel like there's a lot of 'woe is me' level plots, and to see this one veer into it was a bit of a let down.

Overall, this one was a bit of a miss for me, unfortunately, because I really loved so much of the art and presentation of what was happening. I'm also a fan of the way Aderie does their art style and conveys really cool ideas through these animations. I think I'm starting to let some personal bias in here, because I do like the characters, they're really interesting and I really start to feel for them, but then when the ending comes around so abruptly, and nothing is really left explained and I think this story is supposed to make me feel depressed? Maybe feel like one can get through despite how bad life is? I'm not sure, but hey, I guess as long as someone feels something, it must be good? I dunno man, keep doing what you're doing? Maybe I'm just distracted by all the moving pictures.

'The Leveret Spirit' is a drama/romance story about the friendships and awkward situationships that folks get themselves into, especially in an online environment, where communication can be stilted and people have an ease of overthinking things. This is such a time capsule of the end of the era of the dominance of MMOs back at the start of the 2010s, the way that teenagers that were once able to spend their lives and friendships in this fantasy world, yet growing older and suddenly the endless time and energy isn't there and the game is not what it used to be. When it became so much of your identity, how does one move on from that, can they or should they? Are bonds forged in virtual worlds able to translate to the real world? And if not, why do the problems feel and hurt so real?

The story follows a friend group on the verge of their MMO game shutting down servers. Already max level, the crew only log on to be social and do the last bits of content that they can squeeze out of the game, like hunting rare drop mounts. As one of their last ways to spend time together, they find rumors of a hidden quest, one left unfinished and never fully released. After figuring out the trigger (which was to perform a homoerotic act in front of a statue in a deserted zone, no wonder it was just rumors), they start on this admittedly rough and tongue in cheek quest. During which is when all the drama comes out, when Root and Hugo are getting flirty with each other, and Mira the third friend is feeling like a third wheel. So much drama ensues from self-esteem issues, lack of communication, so much comparisons between who is the better friend, tiptoeing around trying not to hurt each other's feelings (so painfully relatable to folks who forged a lot of online friendships). They eventually have to walk it off and come back willing to be at fault to keep the friendship going, and it does. They finish the quest, and get their reward, of a nice buff and access to a secret hot spring to do RP stuff in. Of course, Root and Hugo eventually confess their feelings for each other, and life goes on.

The presentation is surprisingly high value. While I could talk about the stuff like the menu and the art, the thing that really stood out was the really good utilization of the text as a way to convey emotion and emphasis on certain words and phrases. The way that yellow text was used for in game messages, the highly emoticon style of speaking, the rainbow colors every time the word gay is used. Even in the beginning when it's just white text on a black void, the way the words would position themselves on the screen is just poetry. Plus, all the really good visual novel and video game gags, meant there's always a bit of humor and levity inserted into the scenes. Mira's character jumping off the cliff just to respawn, the dissolving for logging in and out of the game, the fight scenes, and even the ragdoll physics sex scene at the end (my favorite sex scene). Audio was really well done, lots of funny gags and use of ambient noise. The writing gets a pass because of the characters talking through 2010s MMO text boxes where it's okay to misspell words and make non-sequiturs. I think there may have been a few places where certain plot points or emotional beats were getting repetitious, but it didn't detract from the story.

The folklore aspect is interesting, because this is in a way a virtual folklore, the idea of a hidden quest in an MMO, but since it's so out of the way and provided so little reward, folks would only find it for the sake of finding it. Very MMO core, and I think it technically counts, though I guess I wish that a little bit more time was spent establishing the MMO world that the story takes place, as it assumes that the reader knows quite a bit about MMOs and their lingo. Jumping puzzles, grind quests, mount farming, starting areas, lowbies etc. Like, I understood a lot of the references because I too played a lot of WoW in 2010, but to some of the newer gen readers they might appreciate a bit more set up on what was the framework for the MMO. I thought it was a really creative entry, not only writing the story, but also making a somewhat believable fake quest for this fake MMO. Plus, I just love how you know how gay the characters based on how they dress their characters, just full on revealing outfits and nearly naked avatars. I thought it was interesting how we're left to infer a lot about the protagonist's real world appearance, but I think it worked to the effect the story was going for in how he only wanted to be viewed through the lens of the character he could be. I do also think it was super fun to add in all the referential humor, like the 150k Morenatsu fix-it-fic, the chula joke, the 'stare-at-the-camera' moments. It added a lot of levity to what could easily be a real downer of the story.

For a first time crew doing a visual novel, I think you hit it out of the park. I was engaged the whole time, and while I did get a little bit bogged down with some of the spiraling and melodrama in the middle, I thought it reached a satisfying emotional resolution. It's hard for me to find something 'lacking' in this visual novel. I think folks may have pointed out but don't forget to put some effort into your thumbnails and itch page. I think maybe the title of the story also doesn't do a lot to entice the reader into knowing what the story is about. They're a bit subjective, sure, and now I kind of get why it's called that, but also, while that's the name of he quest the characters are doing, it's not actually what the emotional arc of the story is about. What I'm trying to say, if the title is going to be called 'The Leveret Spirit', I would hope to find out what is a 'Leveret' and why it's 'Spirit' is so important. I'd suggest since you did so many custom sprites and backgrounds, to splurge at least for one CG to punctuate a really impactful scene. Otherwise, this is just a solid and really good project you made, I look forward to you guys tackling on more ambitious projects and trying out new things.

Then that makes it all the more impressive that you got so much done in such an even more limited time span!

'Seaside Camping' is just full on fun-light-hearted slice-of-life smut, and I love it for that. It's not trying to do anything fancy, it's giving exactly what's on the packaging, four wolves, a fun island seaside adventure, some cute banter, and straight up all the gay wolf sex.

The story itself is something very simple, main guy Pepper is going on a solo-vacation because he wants to get out of the house more, and there's a little bit of wanting to come out of his shell and some self-insecurities. He literally bumps into the four wolves, a group of friends who come in four slightly different flavors of fit wolf man: hunky and friendly, big and serious, small and timid, and fluffy and goofy. They go on a tour of the island, decide to do a detour, end up stranded on the island until the next day because they missed the boat back to the main land, now they get the island to themselves to camp out on. They do such fun activities like, swimming in the ocean naked, playing truth or dare, and having an orgy. It's smut in like the best way possible, since it gives you enough of a set up to feel some kind of connection to the characters, but also, if you're only here for the smut, it gets to the point rather easily and without much difficulty. The foreplay is cute with everyone slowly warming up towards doing sexy things, and then just diving head first into the sex.

The presentation is extremely polished, crisp and clean. This seems to be a non Ren'Py program, so I feel like I'm missing a few features from that that would make experiencing the game a bit easier, like fast-forward element or hiding the text box to see the sprites fully. The GUI and the art style is all very cohesive, and gives off that sort of mobile idle game feel. There's lots of little animation movements throughout, which really sells the immersion, like the ruffling fur on the wolves or the campfire. The audio design was on point, very great with the ambient sound effect. The little CG screen moments like swimming in the ocean or the straight up sex scenes are a treat. The small detail of putting the head shots of the characters in a stamp is also really cute. I am the last person who should be commenting on the almost-palette swapping of the wolf-characters, but I'm sure even you know that these wolves are a little bit cut and paste. But I will say, even as palette-swaps, enough change is done when it comes to outfit choices, fur color, size and scale, and the way they act and talk, that I did also eventually fall into the getting immersed into it. I'm surprised that this game was as linear as it was since this feels like it might've had an intention of having some branching paths or a game element to it. I'm not mad at it, since Pepper technically gets to have a moment with each of them, but doing branching paths to influence affection with each wolf would give a lot of replay value to the game. The writing is serviceable, it's not doing anything to out there, and it's got plenty of hot descriptions to carry through the sex scenes. A lot of really good physical descriptions there. Plus, there were some funny moments with the characters talking to each other, I think Bruno is the one that gets to carry the story since he's the one that does the most out of pocket stuff and drives the plot.

The folklore element is technically present in the story, as that's the reason they came out to the island is to visit some ruins, very touristy. That being said, the actual plot doesn't really have must to do with it, and it fully embraces that it doesn't have any intention of doing more than just including it for the sake of the jam. As far as being creative, the presentation is the most creative aspect of this smut story. It plays it very safe. All the wolves are conventionally attractive, the main character is just enough of a blank slate to self-insert into it, the wolves personalities are just reasonable enough that they don't have particularly strong character choices, as well as aside from getting some one-off anecdotes of their past, we don't really dive deep into their backstories or why they're all friends to begin with. Not that it needs it, just an observation that this has the emotional equivalent of a free-to-watch porno-vid.

I feel one of the best things about smut is that you can really go absurd with the narrative and plot logic, and this one goes surprisingly safe and grounded in that regard. The one unhinged thing the group does is leave the tour group to go see a cliff, and that just ends up with them stranded on a deserted island for a night. I think there were a lot of opportunities you could've explored with that premise to really enhance the smuttiness rather than playing it relatively safe. We've seen the skinny dipping, we've seen the spin-the-bottle, what could be something that only in this premise could be done and have it be super arousing? What's the group dynamic that could add a bit of tension to this situation? There's a lot to explore in this setting. Overall, I think it's a solid and really technically well done game. It does everything that it said it was going to do. There's definitely lots of room to really push the premise and I feel that with your skill set, you could really swing bigger. It's good, but I definitely want more.

'A Coin on His Mouth' is a thriller of inexplicable circumstance and bad people getting what they deserve. While an element of mystery and political is coursing through the undercurrent of the plot, the story is a tale of how sometimes things can't be easily explained and how sometimes we're at the mercy of the supernatural. Though striking visuals, and excellent direction, this is the kind of story that's meant to give a chill up your spine and be a little bit more tense after you read it.

The story is one of a pair of medical professionals reminiscing over a shared incident now that their country's political regime has finally switched. The two medical professionals are Jorge and Michelle, and that one night they're approached by a small group of solders looking to have a body examined. Jorge and Michelle, they are already suspecting foul play and corruption, but they relent and do as the solders say, as they currently have the power. During the autopsy, Michelle suggests to do a  superstitious ritual of placing a coin in the mouth of the deceased, for if they start to bleed out, it's likely that their killer is nearby. Nothing happens at first, but when the medics are taking their breaks, stuff happens. The solders go missing, the corpses are bleeding out, random shattering of glass and the solders are spooked. In a panic, the lieutenant who was the worst of them, gets hit by a car as he flees in terror. They never could explain what happened, and we never quite either, but there's a lot to suggest that something super natural was at play.

The presentation is impeccable, even from the menu with the stylized RGB effect. All the character sprites and CGs just have so much personality to them. They're creepy and morbid, but that's what this genre is known for. The audio design is also on point, just being eerie enough to make the reader feel discomfort, without being grating. The writing is also as technical as it needs to be to feel real, but also evocative enough to instill unease in the reader. There's no big monster, just a lot of inherent creepiness, and a lot of weird clues left about to let the reader try to fill in the blanks. Though whether the reader feels compelled enough to want to put together a narrative, I think will vary from reader to reader. Some will be satisfied just reading a scary story, some I think might come away perturbed by the lack of concrete evidence of what happened and just a lot of speculations. Stuff like the money that was left, the ring, and why not just one, but two bodies started to bleed out.

The folklore aspect, I did not expect to be implemented in this fashion. Often with lore around death, they come off more magical and religious in nature, so it was a breath of fresh air to examine it from a medical/scientific perspective, even if it remained unexplained in the end. This is one of those kinds of stories where I feel like there was a lot of thought put into the world building and backstory, so that it properly informs the narrative, but then I wonder just how significant it was to the story itself. Was it actually super natural? Was it an assassination that then needed to be covered up? One big conspiracy? Unreliable narrator? I fear that perhaps this is one of those stories that doesn't have an answer and relies on the reader to satisfy themselves coming up with a reasoning that makes it all make sense.

While it looks like this was a team effort, this does also look like a first time entry for this author/team lead. All the pieces together really do elevate this visual novel into a full immersive experience. The level of polish from menus and the UI, even though I thought the moving text box did get a bit distracting as it happened. I'm surprised that the story takes place in a flash back, as it does spoil the ending on knowing that the two character at least survive, maybe softening the blow and making it a less tense read for those easing into horror stories. I know it's more of a personal bias against ambiguous plot elements, but it does feel more unsatisfying than cathartic when even how it happened is a mystery, I would've still liked to have know why it did happen. But, I will praise the strong characterization with all the fun details and the way they speak, and this really did create a tense atmosphere. With a team like this, y'all could really make some banger projects.

'Rain of Feathers' is the saga of a friends-to-lovers story set in magical medieval furry times. From a tradition that started between he friendship between two kingdoms, the birds and the wolves, a new friendship blossoms into something more. This has got a crazy emotional resonance that's really good about pacing this romance story as a slow-burn, who's only fault is that it's too slow-burn for it's own good and it ends up not being finished!

The story starts with innocent beginnings as two children meet and become friends at the yearly festival that brings the bird people and the wolf people together for a festival called the rain of feathers. Really cute tradition about how birds drop feathers, wolves pick on up, and then the bird see who picked one up and then they spend the festival together forging a friendship. Time skip to when the two are teenagers, and they're still deepening their friendship, and honing their magical and physical skills to become adventurers when they're of age. Crow boy, Roberto, is suddenly hit with the hormones and is like "Oh no, I'm attracted to my best wolf friend, Jacob." Course, as he doesn't want to compromise his friendship, he keeps it hidden. Time skip to when they're adults and just about adventuring age, they spend time together exploring the wilderness, finding hidden ruins, and getting unusually close as Roberto pervs on his friend and becomes a voyeur (so hot). Those ruins they found though, something is related to that legend that they might've uncovered, wonder what it is, since it just finished! It's a really good slow-burn of a friends-to-lovers story, I love the dynamic of the fighter-outgoing-jock wolf and the wizard-reserved-nerd crow, and their innocent and pure friendship that then slowly morphs into something more lustful and perverse. Love the tension of the yearning of wanting to become more but not to risk their friendship.

The presentation is also really nice. I love the emphasis on the cg of teen Jacob with the moon smiling, such a great shot. And there's a lot of feeling and concept work put into this to really try to convey the story you want to tell. Like, yes a lot of the backgrounds are sketches and rough around the edges, but there's also a lot of surprisingly polished pieces here. You've got the introduction of the folklore story being striking, the sprite work of these boys as they grew up, into very handsome men, and then of course the eye candy of Jacob in the waterfall. I will say there's always improvement for adding polish, like title screens, but I think time limit got you ya, considering the ambition of BGs you wanted to put in this. Audio work was also quite well done, with lots of fun sound effects to emphasis on magic spells or weapon hits. It's cute whenever a sprite flies upward to show the birds flying away. The writing could definitely use a pass or two with some edits. The bones are there, it just needs refinement. Making sure that certain sentences read well, maybe fleshing out some more details in certain areas while cutting down on excessive details in other areas.

The folklore theme is also really strong in this one, coming up with a custom one for this world. Sure, it's a bit more historical in context, especially since magic is real, but I think it works for setting up the theme of this story, which is that love can bridge even across races. There were a few moments where the text and dialog gets a little bit anachronistic, using surprisingly modern vocabulary for a fantasy setting, which can bring the reader out. I appreciate the gay-positivity talk Roberto had with his mom, though I think that could use a bit of tweaking, either to better re-enforce Roberto's reluctance to reveal his feeling for Jacob, or to better re-enforce how the world setting views such an unusual relationship pairing. Mom is okay with it, but is this normal society wise? Is there more at stake if Roberto reveals his sexuality than just losing his friend? I thought the concept of the tale was really creative, even if it then seemed to lead into a very standard love/adventure story setting.

I'm really glad to see Kemonito Kusuri use this jam to hone in on their writing and storytelling skills. Something that I notice is that there's always good bones to the stories, but either due to feature creep, too big a scope, or time management issues the visual novels end up with neat concepts and engaging moments, only to be cut short or feel too cumbersome to get to those good bits. I know in previous entries there were attempts at a game-elements, I'm glad the story didn't feel the need to add something in for game-play's sake. Where I feel that you should focus in on for your projects is to leave time to edit, figuring out the heart of your story and making sure the bits that you want to keep in are supporting that. I want to backseat so bad telling you what I think it is, but I also know that this is your story and you have a specific vision to what you wanted this story to be. I'm a sucker for young and first time love, keeping it chaste but also real vulnerability, and I thought that you nailed that feeling on the head.

'Paws and Recs' is a light-hearted slice-of-working life as it follows a group of young college aged adults as they endure a summer job at a national park. Definitely feels like it's inspired by the show it's name-sake is after, there's a fluffy and laid-back vibe to this story, as it's a very low-stakes working environment, yet the main characters a trying to balance enjoying themselves as much as possible without losing their jobs. There's also the introduction of a bit of a wish-fulfilment meet-cute when the new guy who shows up to work is just Mr. Perfect for the MC.

The story itself just follows our main guy, Liam, as he's woken up from a hot sex dream to find out he's almost late for first day at work at the national park. He makes it just barely and catches up with the established cast of his friends and bosses, but there's a new guy at orientation, Greyson. Now, Greyson is extremely chill, plays guitar, is good at driving golf karts, is totally down to smoke weed after hours and is also gay and just broke up with his loser ex. After a bit of shenanigans at work, Liam finds himself stressing over insecurities like, since he's a bit on the heavy side and gets ribbed for it a lot. Turns out Greyson is into Liam and it totally okay with making out. As a sort of fluff piece with no real stakes, conflict, or tension, this is a really good light read for a feel good time. There's a couple of implied scares such as showing up late a speeding into work, ditching orientation speech, or driving recklessly with the golf kart, but they're all resolved quickly or aren't a problem to begin with. The characters are pretty fun to read about as well, though they all have slightly differing flavors of 'new-gen young adult', but enough quirks to make them stand apart from each other, especially in contrast to their overbearingly positive and somewhat cringy bosses.

The presentation is charming. I'm guessing that some of these photos are self taken, which adds a personal touch. The character designs and sprites are expressive and help convey who these characters are. I'm kind of a sucker for some of these smug and wacky facial expressions that are given to them, especially Liam's smug face. The lack of music and audio is noticeable, though I also understand the struggle of finding free-music that fits the vibe without also being so over-used in so many visual novels that it becomes an issue in that manner too. Though, it does seem to be the common rule-of-thumb to opt for the stock music even if it's over used, so that you can then utilize the silence in your visual novels as well. The writing is adequate, I don't think I was confused by a lot of the newer slang terms like some other VNs, especially good job by adding in those context clues. The dialog also felt very natural, good flow between characters and conveying information.

There's actually not much of a folklore aspect to this, I think the closest that this comes to a folklore is coming across a table full of assorted knick knacks in a type of "work place shrine" type of deal, which makes it personal to the workers, but not necessarily influences their behaviors or anything superstitious about it. Still, traditions are traditions, even if they're little workplace ones, so I begrudgingly will consider that there's an element here, even if it's the amount equivalent to the flavor in sparkling water. As a slice-of-work life that is based on true recollections, and a bit derivative from existing stories but with a new-gen twist, there's not too much that makes this stand out (though still love the character expressions).

As a first timer VN producer, really solid first showing! If you were aiming for fluffy slice of life with a twist of romance on top, you achieved it. Love the characters, the art is charming, and pulling from real life experiences really makes this world feel real, with lots of those oddly specific details that give just enough character without being distracting. I will say that since this is so fluffy and low-stakes, it'll be hard for folks to get really hooked on the story without some kind of conflict that drives the story forward. So far, this story's conflict seems to be internal 'I like this guy, I don't want him to reject me', but since it resolves instantly without Liam having to work for it or make some kind of effort/change, it's doesn't hit very hard. Liam likes his job, he likes his coworkers, his bosses are annoying but seem lenient, and he seems to mostly have an issue with being gay internally, but externally, no body gives him any flak for it... so it's like, where's the story? Is there an arc for Liam to grow from? Even if this story were to be a farce, there should be a motivation for Liam. Some examples off the top of my head include: Liam is normally cool, but acts the fool around Greyson because he's so hot, and he keeps making a fool of himself. Liam is annoyed being stuck having to train the new guy, Greyson, until he realizes that Greyson is cooler than he initially came off as. Work place tradition is to haze the new guy, goes too far and now they have to make things right. Try to keep these kinds of character or narrative arcs in mind when you're conceptualizing the story, it'll make for a stronger hook.

No worries! You stick up for your work!

Now knowing that the perspective of the narrator was supposed to be consistent the whole time, I can see what you were kinda going for, at least in terms of wanting the fox to appear all powerful and all knowing. It does get confusing, because it does start a little bit disembodied voice to start until the fox is introduced. Perhaps cluing in the reader that the fox had been watching this happen the whole time would better portray that. Even a quick line of "I've watched you this whole time as you scaled the mountain," would add a lot of clarity. Though it does also add in a funny wrinkle, that the fox was fully aware that the villagers were coming up to give him his flower offering, and saw that the wolves killed him, which makes the fox a very vengeful god indeed. Talk about "oh you killed those villagers who worship me, well now I'm going to kill your entire family." I dig the gruesomeness of it.

As for my unpolished/amatuerish comment, I should clarify. When the sprite shows up on the visual novel screen, there's a lot of graphical transparency artifacts in the outline of the clothing, which I think something happened either during the painting process where it's not fully opaque or some kind of transparency thing is happening where it looks all fuzzy. At first I thought it might be not using layers and just paint bucket filling in, but I'm not sure what your art process was. The open mouth with all the teeth showing was certainly a choice for a starting expression, since it also looks like he's constantly yelling, but with digital I think it wouldn't be too much to have an open and closed maw sprite. I would also suggest looking into using eyebrows and eyelids to help convey emotion in your sprites. You'd be surprised how many expressions you can get with just a closed mouth with a few sharp teeth sticking out, and then adding in facial expressions with eyebrows and curves to the mouth to give smiles, frowns, or neutral emotions.

'Witch Trap' is a slice-of-life, romance, comedy, mystery story. Got to point out that this one is one of those 'first-act' submissions where it spends the time setting up the characters and the premise, and leave us on a cliff-hanger right when the plot is about to start. I think it's supposed to be a a fun riff on spooky shows like Scooby Doo, the Ghost Stories anime, and adding in an element of Among Us.

The story is fairly simple, a group of four college aged friends decide to sneak into the school campus to perform a test of courage/ritual of friendship, cause one of them just wants to do it. The main character is gay for one of his friends, but is kind of developing a crush on the other friend. There's a lot of talking and banter, and then they do the ritual, and oh no, turns out it was a trap (the Witch Trap), and one of them is actually not who they say they are and is going to eat the other 3 if they don't figure out who it is. Then it 'to be continues'. It's actually a really fun premise for a visual novel, one that we've seen before in mystery genres, a story about deception and figuring out who is the traitor/murderer/witch. That being said, the characters aren't particularly interesting off the bat. I think they're supposed to be archetypes of the jock, the nerd, the slacker, and the girl, but they're all pretty muted as far as personality goes, and the motivations for these characters are very flimsy at best. It feels like this might have been envisioned with middle or high school aged characters based on how immature and tropey the seem to act.  It could work with that age bracket if you keep it PG-13. Structure wise, it's weird that we immediately get a full backstory dump from Marcus about how he's blind in one eye, and also always carries around an umbrella, and yet we don't know anything about the main character, or anyone else. Like, I guess he's important to be the love interest, but the whole intro goes on about how the main character is into the jock, Luiz. The plot feels a bit unfocused and not sure what to do with these characters.

The presentation has some strong points and some weak points, that's how I'd describe it. The art for the sprites is fine, it seems to get the personality of the characters across, though the way some of the important details like the blind eye I had to really squint to see it. Also be careful about flipping sprites that have asymmetry. That's also the other thing about this game, the visuals are really dark. Like I get that it's supposed to be at night, but everything is shaded with this dark blue, but you can't really see anything, it's almost as if we were in the void. I'd suggest instead shading with a really saturated blue or purple, rather than just going dark. That way you still convey the darkness without it literally having to be dark. I will say it was neat when the blinking eye animation popped in, and the big 'jump scare' moment of all the characters shaking. Though one detail of the room bobbing up and down as if you're walking the hallway did kind of give a bit of motion sickness. The CG is nice when they're under the umbrella too. The writing was not as strong as the visuals. There's a lot of weird sentence structures and word choices for the characters. The dialog comes across a bit stilted and awkward, like the characters are trying to be quippy, but don't actually say anything. The worst thing I would say is that the text really drags and is  filler basically. Several points and details get repeated, but not even for importance sake, just because it seems that the characters don't have much else to contribute to the conversation. Try to keep in mind, that each line should have some kind of purpose to it: Giving insight into a character's personality or motivations, Moving the plot along, or By being an amusing thing to describe. The other thing, is if the crux of your story is the witch trap mystery plot, why does it seem to take so long to get to it? Why are we starting at the end of the school day, when we could just start at the meeting outside the school at night? Why are we missing chalk and then spending time walking through the dark school alone to get it? This much time shouldn't really be spent on ambience when we're only getting the thoughts from the main character about it. Why are we making jokes in our head when we could be making them to the other characters?

The folklore aspect is a bit weakly portrayed as well. There's talk of a witch, and a spell book, but it's never established why they got the book, or why they decided to do this ritual. I don't want to say this feels derivative, since everything is derivative, but it's hard for me to say that there's something about this story that helps it stand out from other whodunnit mysteries. Like, what do the characters gain by doing this? Are they doing research on the occult? Are they spooky enthusiasts? Is this a dare or challenge to join the spooky club? Are they just bored and looking for something to do? If so, why do they seem like they're being forced to do it?

I think this is a first time solo-dev-ing or working with a smaller team, so I'm assuming that this might have either been a lot of time constraints within the jam itself. It could also be a case of weird project management, where we have 1/3rd of the story for the initial friend banter, 1/3rd for Marcus' backstory, and a 1/3rd for being in the dark and doing the ritual. It makes me wonder if there was an outline on what the major beats of the story were going to be, and if you knew how to get to them. Was the plan always to just get to the end of act 1 and start the ritual, or was that just as far as was gotten done for the jam? I applaud the effort it took to get this much of a first build done for the jam, with all the asset creation and writing, but I feel like more time should have been done during the conception stage to get a good road map of this project.

'Carried Cold' is a dark and tragic tale about loss, grief and the ability to let go of that grief. The tale puts you straight into the view point of a someone who is in the midst's of a tragedy, one that they did not know they brought upon themselves, and then seeking a magical being who may yet be able to right it, only to find that there is no salvation, and one must simply let go of the grief they have, else they be consumed by it and may pass it on to those they come into contact next. It reads like a proper folklore-ish tale, with it's not-happy ending, and requiring the reader to seek for meaning in the tragedy, when it's likely there is none to be found. Perhaps, showing the intrinsic purpose of folklore to begin with, a way to make sense of the randomness and unexplained that life has.

The story is about a family of wolves. They go out hunting in a snowstorm, and in their hunt, come across a group of villagers. They kill them for food for them and the rest of their den. However, once the hunting party returns to the den, they find that the snow storm has caused a cave in and the entire rest of their pack had been crushed to death in the den collapse. The father wolf, who was out hunting with his wife and son, start to travel to the top of the mountain to seek help from the mystic fox. Both the wife and son perish on the journey, the father carrying the two bodies in hopes that the mystic fox can do something. He finds the fox, only to learn that the villagers they had killed for food, were on a pilgrimage to assuage the mystic fox, for every year they travel to pay tribute to stop the snow storm. Since they were killed, the mystic fox's snow storm continued, and it was the snowstorm that killed the wolf's pack and family. The wolf pleas that the fox at least stop the storm, and the fox only agrees if the wolf could release his grief of his dead family. The wolf relents and the fox satisfied, never brings about such terrible snow storms again. Like, it's such a good story, that recounting it feels easy enough to pass on from person to person, and is full of tragedy and unknowing self-destruction, and dealing with forces outside your control. It proposes that people realize that sometimes their actions have far reaching consequences and while may provide immediate benefit, could ultimately lead to preventable tragedy. I really appreciate the concept and lessons that a folklore tale should give.

However, while the story is really good, I can't quite say the same for the rest of the visual novel. The presentation almost takes away from the story, and it should never really feel as if the story would be better presented as just a text document to read through. While I appreciate that there's backgrounds to give the ambiance of a snowy mountainside, I think that's all that's ever shown in terms of background scenery. A single sprite of a wolf character is used to represent one of the characters, though it seems to be used for (I believe) two characters. While I think it's admirable to create your own art asset, I would be lying if I didn't say that the style comes off almost too amateurish and unpolished, especially when there were plenty of art sprites that were free to use. While I get that you may have been going for a specific vision of a family of wolves, sometimes you've got to adapt and make changes to make the story work. Additionally, while I don't dislike the heavy use of NVL mode, there could have been more care that went into the appearance and formatting of the NVL text boxes, instead of just leaving it in the default left aligned slightly off center of the screen. The writing was also rather unpolished, with the view point of the narrator changing at least 3 times, from the son, then to the mystical fox as we get his entire backstory of how he came to be, and then the father as he meets the fox, and it always coming off as a weird transition when the change happens. The structure is also rather odd, giving the backstory to the fox in the middle of the wolf story, just comes out of nowhere, and while it makes sense in hindsight, the information could have been exchanged in a more natural way, rather than a immediate cut away. The writing itself is okay, the story does a lot of heavy lifting so even simple prose would be able to carry the gravity of the central themes. I will also say, that it might just be me, but I believe that the characters are all anthropomorphic wolves and foxes, yet, it also comes across that they might also be feral wolves and foxes at some points, so I would suggest trying to make that more clear in establishing your story world. The use of the visual aspect of the visual novel medium would help in this area.

As mentioned before, I thought that the folklore theming was quite strong in this one, feeling like this story is one that could be told for a culture (if it is, I don't really know which one). It's held back a lot by some of the writing structure choices and the default looking nature of the ren'py engine. As a result, it's lacking any identity that would've helped sell the vibe that you were going for: if this was meant to be a folklore tale itself, if it was being told from the father wolf's perspective looking back on the events, if it was a thriller that you witness as it was happening. Even without a lot of artistic skill, there are a lot of ren'py options to make the text look better, the way that you position the sprite on the screen, or emphasizing certain texts.

That all being said, this is a valiant first attempt at a visual novel, and there's definitely some good foundational skills being developed here. Going between text box and NVL mode is a good start, and the story ideas are there. This is one of those situations where you just need to make more visual novels, or just more art pieces in general. Take the time to read more visual novels, even the ones here in the game jam, the short ones also done by some first timers, peak under the hood at some of the script files. See what kinds of techniques and storytelling ideas they're using, find a way to incorporate them into your own works. There are free resources that are provided by the jam, use them, and you can still supplement the free assets with custom ones that you make yourself. Don't feel too limited by your own ideas, adapt and change things up in order to fit what tools and skills you have at hand. You'd be surprised at how many folks have started at similar points and continued to improve.

'Folklore Reclaimed' is a delightful little game experiment about reconstructing a story when all the tidbits are from so many different perspectives. The main game play loop is taking the two folklore stories, and comparing the different versions of them to point out contradictions, to hopefully come out with the 'correct' one. It's a neat concept that takes inspiration from games like Ace Attorney, and there's a surprising amount of breadth to the stories and how the reader can interchange the details of the text.

The story framing is that we're a college student doing research on old country folklore, and we are going to talk to an old man in a remote village. What little time we spend in this set up is just really well detailed and gives so much personality to Chayon, the elder, and just how much backstory the old man has and how much it shapes the way he speaks and responds to the suggestions from the 'official' stories. The stories themselves are this one about an inventor the mechanical body he builds for his late lover's soul, and the tale of two witches who need to be made to work together to solve an illness coursing through the village. What I appreciate is how Chayon's got a particular bias to the way he tells his stories, as they're full of progressive ideals such as same sex lovers, explicit depictions of sex, and happy endings, while official stories tended to lean towards erasing some of the mystical parts of the lore, like making the witches charlatans and instead relying on medicine and doctors, and then the archival texted which heavily referenced a lot of divine intervention from the gods themselves. Eventually, you either change too much and the old man kicks you out in anger, you change too little and he sends you off, or push back just the right amount to run into a hot wolf guy before going to the lounge.

I've used the word delightful, and I think that encapsulates how I felt playing this game. The bright music, the pleasant setting and the low stakes just make this a cozy game to see how much you can play around with the story structure. It's kinda crazy coding all the replacement story stuff as well as making the whole "replace text scene" work, so I was surprised at how well it ran. The writing, with it's surprising depth, was particularly simple in the end. I did get a few good chuckles from how horny you can make the stories, but once you get beyond the initial amusement, there's not much more to explore with the story, as it ends after two folktales.

The folklore element is front and center, as it grapples with the whole concept of passing down stories from your old country, and how sometimes those stories can get twisted by cultural shifts, or can be lost to time or bad memory. Still, it's worth preserving and remembering those as best as possible. The creativity is always fun to see with actually getting custom folk lore tales, with different details coming in and out, and letting the reader pick them out, looking for those contradictions.

It's always fun looking forward to an FdRstar production, cause they always remember the 'interactive game play' element of a visual novel, either devising a maze game, mini puzzle games, or in this case, a contradiction finder game. As a result, the amount of enjoyment you derive is based on how good you are at grasping what you're supposed to do, and the reward at the end. There's no crazy secret ending, just a couple of cute endings, which I appreciate not trying to figure out what the 'right' solutions are. It would go against the theme of the game if the was a 'right answer'. Plus, the narratives for his games are always interesting, since there's so much thought and world building put into them. I love the proof of concept approach to the game jam, and it's always neat to see what kind of stories can be told interspersed with game play. Part of me wants to see what kind of experience could be carried with more focus the narrative, but also, I wouldn't want to take the love for putting in game play elements away from them. It really is such a difficult balance.

'A Werewolf in Charleston' is a political thriller/horror contemporary tale that takes the concept of the werewolf myth and turns it into a political allegory, with some slight morbid pornography for just a pinch of shock value. By virtue of being a very self-proclaimed political commentary tale, there is a lot of explicit and implicit imagery and concepts that this story is dealing with: religion, conditional love from family, political violence, propaganda, LGBTQ+ rights, personal identity, radicalization, cult-like indoctrination, self-harm, and gay sex. There are aspects of this story that I think were handled well and really got right, and other parts that I think were pretty weak in their conceptualization and were put in just to really hammer in more of the political posturing, and some parts that felt were inserted into this just because it's a My Wolf genre of visual novel.

To talk about the story, is to look beyond what is simply presented, because even in the case of what it explicitly states, there's a lot of devil in the details, and when trying to make a political message, delivery of the message kind of matters, or else it just turns into propaganda. To start out, You have Andy, who is the son of a church pastor, and on his 21st birthday, he transforms into a werewolf. In this universe, werewolves are a known thing, except that it's legally okay to kill and lynch them, because of reasons. Anyway, upon Andy's first transformation, he runs away in fear of being killed and lynched, and luckily runs into Luis, another werewolf, who then takes him to 'the Den' where there are a bunch of other werewolves. They give him the low down, and the rules are: 1) You didn't get a choice in being a werewolf. 2) Human during day, werewolf at night, except sometimes werewolf in day because it makes for a good plot point. 3) During the lunar eclipse, you need to swap body fluids with another werewolf to stay a werewolf forever. 4) Is entirely your choice to become a werewolf forever. 5) If you don't turn into a werewolf forever, you instead become a horrid amalgamation of a werewolf monster. 6) It's totally your choice. 7) If you don't become a werewolf forever, you better kill yourself or the werewolves will kill you. 8) Did I mention, it's totally your choice. Anyway, after some more waffling about, where Oliver has a scare of possibly being outed as a werewolf, seeing werewolves be hung in the center plaza, having sex with Luis, a protest march that ends violently and several werewolves and cops dead, and then a club shooting (where Oliver wracks up a body count of 3). Turns out that pastor dad was a werewolf this whole time, but the kind that didn't swap fluids and now he's a horrible amalgamation, of which he tries to kill Oliver/Andy, but then Oliver/Andy just kills him instead and eats his heart. Very Oedipus. And uh, that's it.

Okay, I don't normally do this, but I'm going to write down all my retorts and comments I had about this story, because it's very front and center, I think the story is inviting it, and I need to write this down:

> Oh, good, we're immediately transforming into a werewolf, no need for a bunch of will I/won't I to get to the issue.

> I think that werewolf is metaphor for homosexuality, but then it gets a bit conflated with transgender identity, and then also with just general non-socially accepted taboos like drinking and other taboo vices, so it gets really muddled for me.

> Despite it's intention as taboo, the story werewolves also have a code of ethics, that include consent and making sure that sex is between consenting adults over the age of 21. I just think it's a bit undermining of the message when the vagueness of werewolf parallels suddenly also have a purity angle.

> I notice that this story goes from a critique on Christianity, then suddenly shifting to a completely new religion, except that this one is apparently the true one with the moon goddess. Swapping one religion for another, thus, weakening the message against blind adherence to a religion without proper reflection on the religion itself.

> Awfully convenient that the next lunar eclipse is in a month. I get it's for story purposes, but it's just such a plot convenience that adds on a countdown clock as well as inducing fomo in Oliver, who if it wasn't clear before, is clearly being coerced into being a werewolf fully. (I thought we cared about consent?)

> Just how old is Luis anyway? I gather at minimum 26 since his boyfriend died at least 5 years ago, but this detail is glanced over.

> Don't get me started on the whole "We never tell anyone our human identities." Which is like, totally groomer behavior and the craziest red-flags about an organization that he's forced into. Doesn't even make logical sense, unless they were in-fact, doing some crazy shady stuff.

> Oliver/Andy is very one dimensional. He has no real point of view, aside from just "being a good boy". Can't really articulate any meaningful thoughts, and yet is blamed for like, everything. Even at the end, a lot of his actions are forced by circumstance, so it never feels like he shows any agency.

> Luis is just as bad. For someone who's been in Oliver's shoes, he has very little empathy for him and expects him to have an emotional maturity greater than he ever shows. Talk about avoiding accountability.

> Zizi is pretty terrible as a group leader, for letting Oliver lead the protest, and then straight up murdering a cop. She also is the least helpful and least informed wolf, despite being portrayed as someone who should know better?

> Randolph Crane is like the best character, if only because his views and motivations are very well established, and he is the perfect character for delivering the message of "If you don't create a safe space, how do you expect to be trusted by your children," for parents. That being said, it's still very weird that he just carries a switchblade and expects his son to straight up put a wolf out of it's misery. (I get that it was foreshadowing, doesn't make it feel less like it comes out of nowhere though.) 

> Why is the Moon Goddess a thing? Like, talk about bring in way too many existential questions, undermining the nature of religion being based on belief, and taking away even more of Oliver's agency. Never explained, never justified, just blindly obeyed because I say so.

> I know that the self-mutilation of cutting of the finger is supposed to be shown as like, denying yourself for safety purposes, but also, Andy absolutely did the right thing in that situational moment. His instincts were entirely right about how that company would have immediately just killed him on the spot.

> I know Luis was making a point about how humans kill for sport to paint them as evil, but technically other animals do that too (I'm 'um actually'-ing).

> The chemistry between Oliver and Luis is so forced. Like, it's jarring how quickly those two go from weary/distrustful of each other to having sex on a boat in the middle of a lake. And then even after all the murder, still going to have sex.

> This is apparently the first time that Oliver has seen the werewolf bodies be hung in public, and it's like you'd think that would be on the news or something. Quite a way for Luis to put Oliver in a dangerous situation, and then, have Oliver kill someone to save Luis's life. Masterful plan.

> I just kept writing 'melodrama' over and over in my notes as I was reading. No one has a proper talk, they just talk political points to each other.

> I put a note that the boat sex scene was unintentionally funny with the way Oliver looked down at Luis.

> I have to question the logic of Oliver who saw cars willingly mow down werewolves, as if doing a public protest wasn't about to also result in blatant murder.

> I was surprised that it wasn't a massacre with how many times they've just been shot at for just existing.

> Radicalization of one of Andy's friends who was told the location of the Den, which apparently Randolph knew the whole time? Feels a bit plot-hole-y just to have a club shooting scene for dramatic effect.

> Oliver having a higher body count should really count for a lot more, considering how blasé the rest of the werewolves are.

> Do we ever even meet a werewolf that fully became one? We never even examine how drastically might change someone's life. We really are just going all in on assumptions aren't we?

The presentation of this visual novel is extremely well done. The striking typography, the stylized background shades, even the character designs have all been vastly improved since the last few visual novels that Corvus productions has done. Not that previous entries weren't good, but you can see the steady increase in production quality, from extensive use of sound effects for immersion, and the art is just improving too. I made a joke about the sex scene being unintentionally funny, but as a CG, it was also really hot as the scene went on. Monster design is really good, and I enjoyed even the gore-y bits. Maybe it's cause the style isn't as hyper-realistic, so I can stomach it a bit better. The writing definitely has a point of view, and that view is to go on rants. I do wish there was a bit more introspection done by all the characters, as it feels very surface values despite the werewolf motif supposed to being a metaphor thing. It's weird because I don't disagree with the message the story is trying to portray, but it doesn't plot doesn't really allude to why being a werewolf shouldn't be something to be condemned for. The main message I get is "being a werewolf sucks, being a person sucks, because of other people".  I feel like the point of this story is meant as a warning to loved ones who might push away their loved ones by the way that they don't make them feel safe, yet this isn't the type of story that would reach those people. As a result, it feels propagandist in favor of leaving your family behind and fully embracing a new but unknown culture without question.

The folklore aspect makes sense, can't go wrong with the classic southern gothic horror and a werewolf motif. Maybe a deeper explanation into the moon goddess allegory could've helped it feel like it's own timeless version of the world, but as it is, it feels like a weird amalgamation of many different time periods, yet belonging to none of them. It is a fun interpretation of the werewolf myth, where it's more of a parasitic entity within you that waits patently until your 21st birthday to make you a monster that humans want to kill, but you also get the added benefit of having sex with other hot werewolves. I'm actually surprised how little homophobia was mentioned by the church goers, I guess werewolves are a much easier target to hate. That might've been funny to have homosexuality be accepted and not were-wolfism, but we know that according to the Den, it's all still taboo. I think I've gone on too much of a rant myself.

Anyway, overall this is an excellent presentation by Rhetto, who has clearly found his voice and niche about infusing his outspoken activism into a bunch of classic horror plots. I think in this case, there was a heavy handed amount of political commentary frosting topped on top of this werewolf body-horror/romance cake. If I scrape off a lot of this frosting, I find a cake that I really enjoyed. The whole father/son plot line layer was really relatable and emotional. The wolf romance layer with Oliver and Luis was super hot and I was into it. The graphic body horror layer was also really shocking and grotesque. It's just somehow in combining these cake layers, you've added so much of this political frosting holding it together, I get a mouthful of frosting and barely any cake. (Does this metaphor make sense?) Like, I get what this was going for, but wow do I feel like there needed to be some edits being made here. Honing in on the core theme/message of the story, and whether each element is going to either help reinforce that message, or help develop characters, or help develop the world. Then again, if you weren't trying to be subtle, you definitely achieved it.

'For the Black Hour' is another crazy drug trip of a story by the team over at Strawberry Noodles. We've got the trifecta of Strawberry Noodle story traits: a surrealist world with unusual rules and a bunch of magic that I think is supposed to be symbolic, a buddy-trip plot where we get two characters going on a journey to get somewhere and 'do the thing', and those two buddies being weary and distrustful of each other and coming to find that they like each other more than they realize when it turns out they've just been putting up a front. The aesthetic this time? Oppressive light and cult like activities, ala Midsommar.

The story plot is always a crazy ride, this time being a Szeptucha (medicine/magic man from what I could research) and a forest spirit go on a journey to bring night back to the world after it has been placed in eternal day time. Along the way, they meet a couple of cannibals that eat gods, the knights that defend the sun and want to stop them from taking it out of the sky, a village that is filled with burning villagers trying to escape the eternal day, the witch that seems to have something to do with it, and eventually the Bell Tower of the celestial moth that is able to finally put the moon back into the sky. Along the way, the szeptucha and forest spirits learn to like each other, turns out the szeptucha was depressed cause he didn't feel authentically loved, but he got over it because that's just who he is and a god of death told him so. Also, the forest spirit felt like he betrayed the forest that he couldn't protect, turns out the forest did forgive the wolf, so happy ending I think. The plots for these stories are always just fun vivid set ups and funny banter between sad complicated characters, and this gives a lot more of that.

The presentation is top notch, with the art stylization just being really something different and hauntingly beautiful, also a staple of the art team. They really enjoy their body horror painted beautifully, though not as much this time as some of their previous works, leaving more to the writing prose to describe it. The audio work is also really good, though I will say I don't know if I fully understood the purpose of the jump scare scream at the start and end, because this isn't quite as horror story as it feels like it's trying to come across as. The prose as always is a little bit rough, but that comes with the territory of being translated from Polish, but even so, it does a good enough job to get the emotions and feeling the characters have, as well as give them some distinct personalities. I really liked the shift in Lazarus as he slowly gets back his memories, really well described the process of a character acting out on pure emotion, and then realize who he actually is and those emotions are given context. The weakest bit is probably the resolution, as it seemed to resolve without much issue, and aside from meeting a couple of knights, there wasn't any kind of character growth moment, since both characters are already good boys. I wonder if the writer just really needed to wrap up the story for time, so just did it as well as they could. Would've enjoyed a bit of a moment between Lazarus and Cyril, just so they could say that they've grown closer, but I'm not mad it's not there.

The folklore aspect is cleverly woven into the narrative. One, it's got (I think) Slavic folklore-ish traditions being the basis of the story, and then the little Easter egg at the end of the story where it turns out this whole visual novel was a story being told by last year's may-wolf characters. I really liked that call back, and giving a bit of continuity to this crazy story universe. Of course, the creativity is always off the chart with Strawberry Noodles, never knowing what set pieces and imagery is going to come across the screen next. Cannibals eating a corpse with flowers growing out of it, a village on fire with folks playing music, a galaxy moth in a cave, just fever dream at that point. I will say, something about these stories is that I could usually find some kind of symbolism or meta-narrative that might be going on, but I don't think I could decipher one while I was reading it. I had thought by the description it might've been something like a toxic positivity with the eternal day, maybe something about environmentalism and burnout culture with the burning village, or something about self-love and self-sacrifice? If there was one, I wasn't able to pick up on it, but then again, I could just be reading too much and it's just a fun campfire story being told by a kitty and a wolf.

Always an interesting read from Strawberry Noodles. You do need to go in ready to brace yourself for some kind of obtuse storytelling, but it's a fun ride if you let it play out. I wouldn't want to take away from their signature style of being confusing to comprehend, but I'm always fascinated by how much I come to enjoy and root for the pair to get together, so maybe giving a bit of payoff wouldn't hurt for making it to the end. So glad that they've become established enough that they have their own team logo splash they can put on their projects, so leaves me looking forward to what prompt will get them going the next time.

'Her Old Recipes' is a cozy slice-of-life drama kind of story about using baking to deal with grief with a magical twist. The visual novel is cute, a little bit messy, and bursting with personality. It takes what would normally be a grounded in reality story and adds enough magical elements to make it feel almost fairy tale-ish, which I think is also on purpose for what I think was the main folklore inspiration for this piece.

The story follows a young male witch who creates an amalgamation in the shape of a wolf. This construct was made with the express purpose of being fed some recipes (cause it can learn by eating printed paper), so it can help him run his bakery. Though the slice-of-life day with the witch, the wolf slowly learns with the reader the situation with the witch, how the bakery was owned by his grandmother, how said grandmother has died, and the strain on the witch from his mother and himself is what caused him to make the wolf in the first place. In trying to keep her alive, he's just trying to recreate everything she did but just perfectly, which he's been struggling with. Eventually with the help of a lumberjack friend and the wolf, they work through the witch's grief and start living as the grandmother would've wanted him to continue living. The characters are all really well written, each one feeling distinct from the other. The witch being a sad boy, the wolf being a innocent good boy, the lumberjack being a wise friend and his mother being a complicated and angry woman.

The presentation is so good. Like, the first thing that stands out is just how much style and artistic flair this game has. From the UI, to the way the sprites are drawn, to the character designs themselves, very few noticeable hiccups (the only one would be doing mirroring of the sprites, and thus changing up the asymmetrical details). The music is mood setting. The way that the storytelling style changes from standard visual novel to storybook cgs is adorable and just really good in the immersion category. Even the filtered photos make it feel fantastical and not like it's weirdly out of place. There's an aesthetic language that's is so consistent that it's one of my favorites in the jam so far. Writing wise, it could use a couple more pass through for technical stuff like certain words and tenses. However, structure-wise, I felt like it kept going at a nice pace, revealing details and plot points as they became more important. It does get a little bit soap-opera-y and melodramatic when the familial element comes in, making it feel like there's a bit too much trying to pile on, and leaving a sort of unresolved plot thread with his mother, that I felt could've been explored more, other than trying to just paint her as an antagonistic force that doesn't get addressed again.

The folklore element I think is Little Red Riding Hood, and using that as a structural starting point for the character set up is really cute. Especially the "Big Bad Wolf" eating granny's recipes is just a fun interpretation and twist on the classic tale. I thought the setting and the designs were super creative, and the characters were really endearing. I think Russo (the witch) had a simple character arc, going from sad boy to hopeful boy, thanks to the construct that he made. It's simple, but in a good way, giving the feel good cozy vibes and a bit of overcoming grief narrative plot line that warms the heart.

So surprised that this was a first time entry by the author and artist, cause this is just fantastic. The presentation is extremely polished, the art is cute, and the story is also something that just works extremely well for a game jam like this. Like, good judge of keeping the scope in check. It sets out what it wants to do, and executes it. Do I wish that there was a little bit more of a plot happening and there was a bit more deliberate actions being made, sure. Especially with Bonet (the wolf) being super perfect and helpful, a lot of the conflict ends up being existential. But, I get the feeling that this is the story that wanted to be told, and it was told extremely well. Looking forward to so many more projects you decide to cook up.

'Death and the Thief of Stars' is a furry visual novel retelling of a Filipino myth of the source of the stars in the night sky. Always fun when these folklore entries bring me to do outside research about validity of myths vs cultural impact vs purpose of myths, none of which are suited to be discussed here. Instead, this is a story about the role of fate and design, how Gods are often portrayed with surprisingly mortal vices, and the value of balancing the desires of the individual over the desires of the masses.

This is a story about Gods, the god of the moon Libulan, who steals away the stars (that are only visible during the day) from his brother Liadlao, god of the sun, and hides out on the mountain belonging to the god of death, Sidapa. Sidapa starts by speaking on behalf of Libulan to Liadlao, as he is a neutral party who does not care whether stars are in the day sky or night sky. Liadlao reasons that the stars were not Libulan's to take and that by taking them from the day sky would throw the heaven's out of balance for mortals use the stars to divine the future and their locations on the surface of the Earth. Libulan retorts that they are lonely in the night sky and requires the stars so that they can feel beautiful and be seen at night. Sidapa ultimately agrees with Liadlao (in this build) because Libulan is in the wrong no matter how justified their motivations may appear, both in that the stars are not theirs to take and it would cause terrible consequences. As a result, Libulan's wolf form becomes a pig and they fall into a depression and fade while Sidapa gets to be all flirty with Liadlao painting stars in the day sky. We are told this is the bad-wrong ending as another god comes along to tell us that we made the wrong choices, and that they will send us back in time to make the right choices. The good-right route does not exist at this present time.

The presentation is fantastic, with really appealing art sprites of the characters, excellent audio direction and even fully voice acted dialog! There is a lot of effort that had been put into the visual and audio experience, that it feels like watching an independent short film. The visual novel medium is used to a great extent to show all the [exploration] options for more info, or just [response] options to move the story along. I will criticize how it's frustrating re-reading through the story expecting to be able to obtain the good-right ending, that was greyed out, only to find that the option isn't available yet (perhaps not show the option exists?). The writing is quite well done, and reads like a reading an ancient folklore myth, and each of the characters really stand out in their own ways. I will say that I felt the voice acting was a bit too slow for my liking, and about halfway I ended up muting it so I could read through the mundane parts a bit faster. It was interesting that the splash screen warned against this being a dating sim, which feels a bit confusing towards thinking there was no romantic elements in the story, when it also feels like romance does play a heavy role in motivation for the characters, so being a bit more specific in saying there aren't any explicit scene would better convey the nature of the story.

The folklore aspect is front and center, being a re-interpretation of this myth with anthropomorphic furry species. That being said, I'm left wondering how effective it was even as a way to convey why Sidapa would willingly let Libulan steal away the stars for the night. Maybe it's because the current story route does too good a job in portraying Libulan as a spoiled twink with self-esteem issues, and makes Sidapa and Liadlao as the reasonable level-headed guys. Especially with the epilogue straight up telling the reader that "this is not how the story should go, go back and redo it". I take it that this would be better fleshed out in future updates, but for the current build, I think I'm supposed to feel sympathy towards Libulan that doesn't just come across as trying to be manipulative. As if, the only reason I'm supposed to side with Libulan, is because I know that stars show up in the night sky. Granted, that just might also be the original myth. Anyway, I thought this entry was really creative with it's presentation and the way it handled dialog choices.

It's kinda crazy just how good this game is put together for what looks like a first time writer/manager, especially with the help of so many contributors. What looks like several character and background artists, coders, voice actors, editors, and musician. Time management and team management are both hard learned skills, so being able to collaborate with so many is impressive. Scope seems to have outgrown the confines of the jam, so it's a bit unfortunate that we only get what is written to judge the game off of. It's hard to say if there's any critique towards the re-interpretation of the myth story itself, since you have to adhere to the general pre-established narrative, but maybe this visual novel is limited by the source material. Stray too and doing your own thing loses the connection to the myth, staying too close means it's hard to see what spin or new input is given to the story. Funny enough, if you had just left the visual novel as is, where the stars don't get put into the night sky, then it might even be considered a subversion of the expected myth. Perhaps a re-interpretation of what the dark night sky meant, less as a "I'm stealing the stars so I can be beautiful" and more of "I'm embracing my existing beauty, which lifts the dark veil of my jealousy and that reveals the stars," or something with a modern emotionally healthy twist to the myth. Still, great job, and gratz to a strong first showing.

'Outer And Inner Before I Became You, You Became Me' is an existential story about stories. It tries to grapple with the paradox of how important stories can be to preserving memories and teaching lessons, but also how in crafting those stories, the actual people that those stories may be about become distorted and can be lost in the story itself. To craft a story is to file away all the unimportant details that makes a person a person, and crafts them into a character. In doing so, the character is no-longer a person and if that is the case, could a story truly ever capture the memory of what makes a person whole? It presents that people are merely stories crafted by others to identify them, so if there is no one around to tell your story, do you actually exist? Much is the mystery of conscience.

The story actually presented in this visual novel is actually a few layers deep. You have the personal story of the POV main character, a man wracked with grief after losing his mother to Alzheimer's and grappling with the complex emotions of seeing her forget him as a person, thus giving him a little bit of an existential identity crisis. He wanders into the woods where he meets a wolfman. Said wolfman, Cael, is infected by a parasite called FOLKLORE, that exists within the fragments of his mind and is slowly overwriting his thoughts to only be able to tell the story that FOLKLORE is, as if the story itself were a virus strain. I think that the story is actually three stories: the flowers and the bells, the reflective lake, and the threshold seller. Depending on the choices you make and the questions you ask, determine the outcome of the wolf, where you become the new story host, where you let the wolf be consumed by the story, one where you and the wolf share the burden, and I think a secret ending where the story becomes self aware and the parasite stops being infectious (these are my musings, so I might be wrong about the interpretation). I think what the story is trying to go for, is this sort of meta-narrative about stories, and trying to convey to the reader that they are now infected as well with this story.

The presentation is minimal and very much dependent on how susceptible the reader is to 'creepy-pasta'. There's only a few backgrounds and only a silhouette of a wolf sprite, leaving a lot of the visual detail of a visual novel to be left to the text. There is some really cool choices being made in how the menu is minimal and incorporates into the meta-narrative, with menu options like 'listen' and 'leave', very thematically poignant. The shifts from chapter to chapter interspersed with famous quotes from literary works was an interesting touch, trying to indicate which route you were on. Even small details like being unable to skip the 'stories' as they came up, having to click through them, if you've re-read the novel, even a special line if you replay the story to get a different ending, or the title screen change if you find the hidden ending, are fun ways to utilize the medium. That being said, it's a very hard sell in terms of appeal and flair, either on purpose or by lack of effort into it.

As such, a lot of the responsibility falls onto the writing quality itself. It's kind of crazy that this is, I believe, Chinese translated into English, because the prose is very purple and very descriptive. It waxes on about every little detail, while also not really saying anything. Obtuse, would be a way to describe it. It really begs the reader to work at what this story is trying to say, and tackle larger concepts than I think this medium is capable of doing. It almost borders on pretentious. The few times that it gets grounded in reality are nice, otherwise it seems to be about tirades of philosophical concepts that start to lose their impact, the more you realize that there's not really a conclusion that the story is going to be able to reach. It's one of those ambiguous endings, choose your own meaning, type of deals. I don't hate that it does that, and I appreciate the little Easter eggs in the game files for some meta-narrative and backstory, but for as much effort that I put into trying to understand it, left me unsatisfied with the 'prize' at the end.

From a folklore perspective, I get that this was a story about stories, but kind of misses the point of what folklore is. Folklore leans more into a communal and shared story tradition, while this visual novel prefers to focus on how stories are crafted by individuals, in order to 'infect' others with that story. The stories kind of touch on the folklore aspect, with the reflective lake being the most folklore-y of the bunch. I will say this is a strangely creative narrative, and I love the techniques used to make the meta-narrative.

This is a really high concept type of visual novel, and with that comes a lot of risk of it either going over people's heads, or it ending up verbose and exhaustive to read. Unfortunately, as cool as a concept as this seems to be, I don't know if the execution and final product is compelling enough to over come how not invested I was in the characters, outside of my initial curiosity. Funny enough, I wonder if the visual novel is aware of this, as the hidden ending seemed to have the nailed on the head, that one should be interested in the person behind the stories just as much as the story itself. I wanted to feel invested in the characters, but there's hardly anything to latch onto. I understand that its the point, but even so, it would be nice to get some resolution to that. I guess because there are options, it gives the illusion that there's a good path and a bad path, but ultimately, it feels like it's all the same path. That being said, it's really interesting getting a perspective from a Chinese background that I haven't read much from, and I wonder if that's reflective of this author's style of writing, or that's just how Chinese stories feel. 

'Second Chance' is your standard isekai/'died and born in another world' kinda story. It's very straight forward in how it sets itself up, and I don't hate how non-descript and generic it comes off. In a way, it has it's own stylization to it that makes it very easy to understand visually what is going on. I should also point out that this entry was completed in seven days, so while that doesn't look good for time management aspect, it's still impressive what could be put together in such a short amount of time.

The story itself is only the introduction and the first scene of what would be a larger visual novel story. The first scene is a black void scene where [insert character name here] has gone and drowned himself because of non-descript personal issues that made him give up on life. He's approached by the "God of Curses" in the void, and gets reborn/re-materialized as a dog person in this new world of magic. Fun to have the human to furry wish fulfillment happen right off the bat. He wakes up to a very shirtless wolf who has found him in the forest and tells him of his quest to gather the four non-descript heroes of the non-descript prophecy so they can take down the non-descript evil brother of the benevolent king after the non-descript prince had gone missing. They talk a little bit, and then you fall asleep. I joke about the non-descript stuff, since it sort of evolves into it's own style the more it's used, color coordination for magic styles, and what not.

The presentation I think is serviceable. There's some really strong direction with the bold symbols in the void, the bright saturated magic colors, and even the character designs being simple but distinct. The music works well enough, and there's a lot of text timing to add impact while reading. The writing does need a lot of help though. Plenty of typos, awkward grammar from mixing of the tenses in words, and some weird sentence structures. I wonder if this might be an ESL thing or just no time for proofreading, so I can understand that element.

The folklore aspect in this entry is represented by the generic prophecy that is the main plot thread in the story, and I guess it serves it's function to give the wolf character a reason to go on this journey. The bits that really made me like this entry were the little self-aware jokes, that could almost have this function as a parody, if I knew it wasn't trying to be a parody, it was one of those 'look to the camera tell joke' moments. "Ah... you're finally awake." being a recognizable meme and the out of left field "want to see my dick?" and "what is this a furry visual novel?" give this visual novel a weird charm to it that is a breath of fresh air from trying to take itself too seriously. That being said, it is just another isekai that doesn't seem to be trying anything particularly different, almost paint by numbers.

I would say that what this visual novel needs is direction, because it's hard to gauge just how serious you want this visual novel to be. If you're going the route of making it more serious and straight-forward, it's going to need a lot of outlining and a lot of internal consistency. Stuff like figuring out the main character's motivation. He's getting a second chance, at what? To lead a regular life? To feel like he's doing something good? To make up for a mistake in his past? Why would he go on this seemingly dangerous journey in a new world with this wolf to fulfill a prophecy he has no investment in? These are questions that you'll have to think about as you continue to develop this story. If you want to go the comedy and parody route, you'd also need to have internally consistent lore. Just how aware is the main guy of isekai and visual novel tropes? Does he know he's in an isekai? Just how ridiculous are you going to make the characters?  

Overall, I noticed that his is a first time build for this author, and honestly, I love the gumption. It's got a strong bold art style to it, and there's potential for it to grow, but that's what's there, potential. It's a bit hard for me to praise what hasn't been made yet. Another thing I would try to work on is time management, goal setting and establishing scope. A big pitfall of VNs is having too lofty and grand an idea that it either never gets made, or remains in an unfinished state. Set a time limit and a goal for doing updates or chapters. If it takes you a week to do this intro, try to set a goal of one to two months to finish the first chapter which will get the characters to the village and meet the healer. Outline how many major 'things' should happen for your story. Figure out what characters should show up when and where, design the characters, design the villains, come up with a cool conflict. That's really all the fun of making these, and I hope that you continue to have fun making it.

'The Cloud Messenger's Feast' is a meet-cute romance story with a bit of slice-of-life fun with running a bookstore. Of the entries that have been entered, this one is of the more fluffy variety, very light on the conflict, and very heavy in the cozy atmosphere and wish fulfillment. I had a pleasant time with it and I can imagine that is was quite an escapist piece to write.

The story is a simple one of a hyena bookseller (Tyler), spending his days frustrated with the state of the world, goes on a walk in the park and comes across a winged wolf (not-angel named Aryaman), playing an instrument. Turns out he's a celestial being based on a Hindu deity (I'm guessing). As a meet-cute, they share a meal, they talk about stuff, they meet up again at the book store, talk a little bit more, and then go back to the Tyler's place to eat and make out. It's very light on the plot, and if any conflict is present, it's a slight internal conflict with the Tyler for being too distraught with life that meeting Aryaman has given him a reason to not feel so bad. The one thing about this story is that because it's very slice of life, it takes time to explore the very mundane aspects of Tyler's day to day, from managing the bookstore, to ordering tacos, to talking about his problems about the change in culture shift with his friend, and as a result, the relationship between Tyler and Ayraman feels a bit forced, especially since Aryaman has very little context for what is going on and Tyler also doesn't seem to know a whole lot about Ayraman. Having Ayraman be more involved in the scenes, like say, inserting himself to help instead of being a passive bystander, may give the two more chances to play off each other and interact.

The presentation is really cute, the sprites and cgs are really expressive, and I appreciate the sprite flips so that the sprites can look like they're talking to each other. Doing the flipping animation every time is a bit of a choice, and could be a bit distracting. The backgrounds being custom 3D are also nice touches to make it more unique. I will say that the writing does come off as a bit mechanical, but also that it tends to get really detailed and descriptive in the oddest ways. Maybe because it's comes easy to describe food and books, but then that means that it feels like those are the important aspects of the story and focus gets drawn to them, rather than the most interesting thing in the room which is the winged-wolf. Plus, there were the side characters, which while great for filling out the scene to feel lived in, don't contribute much to the plot especially as the fox-cashier seems to show a lot of consideration towards Tyler, ends up just going and hanging out with Deva. Which Deva is great for a contrast in personalities, but also, there's not really a central conflict for this story to sink it's teeth into.

In terms of folklore, I appreciate that it delves straight into this Sanskrit poetry motif, which admittedly I had to look up, and then also realize that I don't really know how it connects with the story. I think as a result, aside from the character saying he's this celestial being and speaking Sanskrit, there's not really a lot for me to make that connection (he says he's not an angel, but like, he could be and I don't know how much the story would change). Likewise, aside from the inherent creativity of designing all the characters and coming up with the plot, the plot and character relationships seem familiar and recognizable, which isn't a bad thing, just something I'm pointing out. 

In terms of aiming for a cozy slice-of-life story, I think you got what you were aiming for. If you were trying to hit some kind of romantic subplot, or have a bigger character arc be present, then I think that's where this story fell short. The thing with romantic plots is that there needs to be some kind of friction in place between the two romantic characters. Usually some kind of personal flaw that one character is working through, and overcomes in order to be with their love interest. In this story, the only friction is that Ayraman doesn't show up for 3 days, and after that, they completely get along and nothing seems to stand in-between their supposed attraction to each other. I would say for future stories you may do, try to look into giving characters a stronger flaw that they either overcome, or compliments the love interest in some way. You'd be surprised how unlikable you can try to make your characters, and readers will still like them if they feel like they have more than one dimension. On the other hand, you could give your story more of a stronger outside force that drives the conflict.  Like for this one, maybe the bookstore is going to shut down unless they make enough profit to pay building rent, or Aryaman is sent on a mission to complete or he can't return to heaven (or where ever he's from). Otherwise, you'll end up with an admittedly safe but fluffy-sweet story.

'The Tale of Drac da Na Coca' is a fantasy adventure story, told through the lens of a DnD campaign and the flavor of Spanish folklore. I think what really appeals to me about this entry is the abundance of the Spanish culture imbued in the visual novel. From the little touches of Spanish traditions, the terms of endearment used, and the aesthetic flair, it does a great job of putting it's viewpoint front and center, and showing of all the small moments that this adventuring party has.

The story is fairly straight-forward DnD fair, an evil dragon is planning to brainwash the city and a group of adventurers bands up to go stop the ritual. You have the party members, the warlock, who is compelled to go on his patron's orders. The paladin who goes as a warrior of good and light, wanting to stop the evil dragon on principal. The bard and the rogue, who each have their own code of honor to put their lives on the line for the defeat of the dragon. There's the march up the mountain, the camp, the ambush, the calm before the storm, the infiltration, and the final battle. It follows the logical progression, even taking the time to flash back to how the group all met in the first place, as well as pair up in their romantic ships. The visual novel actually has choices, where you can get bad, neutral and technically good ends! Sure, they're based on whether or not you follow the script of the hero or turn tail and run like cowards, but the fact that the bad ends actually exist and really take the time to hammer in how badly you fucked up, by making your potential new life a hollow one, and still getting controlled by the dragon in the end is so good in leaning into the bad end. The good end, while technically a good end, is more of a tragic heroism, as while you're able to prevent the major catastrophe, you end up sacrificing your lives in order to do it. At least you got to have one final romp in the tent and the city puts up a mural and statue in the town to remember you by, and the tales of your heroism inspire others to do the same. Nothing too cheesy and sweet, which some folks like the bittersweet endings or the ones where not everything works out in the end. Mature. That said, I did feel like there wasn't a lot of plot momentum, and it tended to meander a bit. The walk up the mountain was slow, we get two separate flashbacks, a scene to set up camp, a scene to fight a guy, a sex scene, a slice-of-life scene with breakfast, the final action sequence scene, and then a scene with two townsfolk that we suddenly focus on in the epilogue. Remember that each scene should set up the next scene, and try to focus on the details that are either going to  give more context or are answering a question that the plot has presented. Like, for the flashback scenes, we already know that the characters are all friends and companions, so needing to see how they met is a little redundant, however entertaining they are. Consider trying to utilize those flashbacks as ways to also support the main plot, like, more information about the dragon instead of having the players talk about it for the reader's sake.

The presentation is really fun. I dig the character designs for the sprites of the heroes, very good at conveying what classes they were. The way the text was manipulated for emphasis in certain ways, the way the screen would darken when the warlock patron would talk was always fun, and even all the little animations that the sprites did helped to immerse the reader more. There was even the inclusion of the axolotl knight from the pre-rendered sprites, but you re-drew it in your style for consistency, very fun.  Plus the backgrounds being mainly self-taken I assume, as you were hiking is such a fun personal touch, that while at first it took a while to get used to it, actually gave it a distinct sense of area and mood. The writing did start to feel a little bit mechanical as it was going through the motions of describing the action scenes and how everything is filtered through Robert's (the main guy warlock) perspective. The dialog and banter was top notch through, as each character had their own personality, and there were some funny lines in there to liven up what was otherwise a pretty tragic story. There were a few technical issues, stuff like names not fitting in the name box, some of the darker green text being tough to read, and the two bad endings having some error in their code that doesn't hit the epilogue or something. Did I mention the great audio and music direction? It also really gave a great Spanish flair to it.

As for folklore, it's always fun to learn about interesting myths and legends, and then adapting that to a DnD campaign feels like the prescribed route to take for this kind of game jam. I won't fault it for doing so, since the jam invites it, so I'll say that it does the genre right by leaning into portraying it as the story, rather than as everyone playing the game which is the story (it was the angle I took in my entry last year). I enjoyed the Spanish flavor to a DnD campaign, so I'd say that that part is pretty creative.

I want to say that the overall theme trying to be expressed in this story is the sort of classic "face your fears, because if you don't you'll regret it more if you ran away." Part of me wonders if having the bad endings be the routes where you survive with your wolf would feel worse if you ended up with survivor's guilt, as not only did Robert have to mind control his wolf, but the city still fell to corruption, and he would have to live with that hollow victory. That being said, I thought the team that put this together did a great job for a first time entry. Lots of character moments, some real stakes, and while I don't think any of them had a particular character arc, it's still good to read about heroes doing heroic things. For a first time go at a visual novel, this is really good stuff especially with the time constraints. I'm sure in the next one, you'll start seeing all the little things you can do to up the polish.

'Lunar Folly' is a romantic story about trad-thoughts, prejudice, and classic werewolves acting as a plot device and also a metaphor for 'the other' in society. It's good to see a proper 'werewolf' story in this 'my wolf' game jam about folklore. Of course that means that it's a human based story, in order to actually have the transformation part of the werewolf bit make sense. I think what makes this rendition stand out from other werewolf stories the pure indulgence and appreciation of the werewolf form and transformation. Most other stories are going to either downplay that part by making the werewolf this monstruous and unpleasant experience, or going the anime wolf-boy route with some sharp teeth and wolf ears. This one gets right into what makes werewolves appealing, large fuzzy cuddly men with just a hint of danger with those sharp teeth.

The story follows Mitch as he is 'hunting/tracking' the rumors of a werewolf in the forest. He finds one! Turns out that werewolves aren't monsters, they just guys who transform and look like that (course they could also kill, but isn't that true of humans too?). Mitch is conflicted, because his world has opened up, and he's tempted to want to be a werewolf too since society has left him feeling suffocated and trapped in his trad-relationship with his childhood friend (who is also a woman non-conforming to society). As he attempts to run away, turns out that part of that is a lie, and the werewolf is actually one of the villagers who likes to transform in secret and there isn't some kind of roaming free pack of gay werewolf men (oh yeah, Mitch is gay). Of course, his fiancé finds out, and is rightfully upset because she's getting the short end of the stick not just from Mitch, but also the whole village and her family all kinda resent her for not being 'a good house wife who needs to get back in the kitchen'. They make up because, and plan to call off the wedding proper (I don't know if this solves her problem, but at least they'll stop having to put on a front so other folks will be nice to them).  Course, free from his husbandry duties, Mitch is free to be who he really is and get transformed into a werewolf for some hot werewolf transformation sex (or not if you're monetizing a live read recording).

Honestly, it's a great story, and I jest in pointing out some of the uncomfortable circumstances, but the extra friction in the story makes the release of tension and pure indulgence all the more satisfying. The art is once again really great, love the stylization, and the humans don't look too bad. Course the cg scenes also get a big thumbs up from me, very hot and something that I don't see all that often. The writing is adequate and gets the right amount of emotion in the dialog to stress certain scenes. I do feel like it can get a tad anachronistic when some words and phrases pop up, examples like being called a 'dude' or 'throw me under the bus', when I'm pretty sure the established setting is some kind of late middle-age period and hasn't reached the industrial period where buses exist. I think there's one moment where a character label wasn't attributed right, but it happened during the sexy scene, so I imagine it's easily overlooked.

I really liked the folklore aspect of this entry. It highlighted the traditions of folklore, but also highlighted some of the negative effects of folklore as well, how they could perpetuate false or harmful stories, establish traditions where the original context has been far removed, or even use it as justification for prejudice types of thinking. I haven't even mentioned all the allusion to a werewolf as a metaphor for being gay and how having to keep it hidden to please your family/society and only letting it come out makes the person feel 'more alive'. It's a new twist on a classic trope for the werewolf story genre, and I think it do anything bright and flashy, it still left an impact with it's strong narrative choices, and grounding the emotional arc in realism. It could've been easy to do a "runs away to start a new life" ending, but having to stay and deal with the problems I think is a more interesting choice, even if we're only left to speculate on how that might play out.

I'm really glad that chmron picked up on a lot of comments from last May Wolf to "let the hot guys have sex". Not that the rest of the visual novel also wasn't a nice experience, with all it's twists and turns, but I mean, c'mon, hot werewolf sex. I really have any notes for how this could be executed any better (aside from a few slight clean ups), I think you achieved what you set out to make. The scope was kept in check, I could easily see this appealing to a nice chunk of the audience. Maybe it feels a bit melodramatic in certain parts, but that's totally works for this kind of story where 'society' is the root cause of your problems. What more can I say, this is good.

'The Burning of Tula Valdi's Zozobra' is the personal drama of one man's obsession and his spiral into madness. This is quite the tale being told as it lets the reader literally go through the thought processes of this lion man, how his initial infatuation spirals into anxiety and spirals into depression. How he laments over what is real and what isn't. How he whips himself up into an emotional frenzy and then scours every possibility to justify it's existence. So caught up in his assertion that started out as love at first sight, morphs into a pride unable to admit mistakes, devolves into a fear of being forgotten, and then even with reality staring him in the face and the possibility of life and happiness before him, he instead clings on to his delusions. Out of fear? Out of pride? Out of stubbornness. If there is one thematic throughline through this story, despite the title alluding to anxiety, what I interpreted it to be was a tale about stubbornness, and how it can drive men to misery.

The story takes place over the course of a year, as the main character, a lion named Tula, catches the glimpse of a wolf at a festival. He didn't approach him, out of anxiety, but now he spends his days planning to meet the wolf again next year at the festival. He obsesses by trying to remember every little detail correctly so when he can find him again, he can be sure. This obsession starts to become a pleasurable delusion for Tula, as he starts to hallucinate the wolf, and in his mind, he falls in love with the idea of the wolf. Thinking that every detail he can remember is yet another way he gets to know him before actually knowing him. The story then follows moments in his year as he interacts with the towns folks that supplement the overall theme. A drunken regular gets too old for his regular drinking nights and starts to forget his stories of his youth. His boss who thinks that a patron has locked himself in one of the bedrooms and is not paying, yet turns out there was never any patron there all week. Even a flashback of Tula, unable to remember his father's face as he left when he was very young. Yet as the day approaches and Tula can finally meet the wolf again, he finds out that the wolf was never there to begin with. Even with evidence to suggest that he could be mistaken, unable to reconcile with the possibility of being mistaken, in order to rid himself of the immense anxiety he literally has to burn a caravan, much like the burning of the zozobra, in order to feel at ease. Of course, in doing so, he's in very big trouble, but that's to be expected. I skipped over a lot of important bits, but really, the story is really well crafted, with a ton of great moments of introspection, the internal conflict with himself as he argues with his own subconscious, trying to out logic himself. Even the glimmers of hope as there's opportunities presented to him to steer clear of his obsession. Yet, as all tragedies are inevitable, Tula is unable to fully reconcile with himself, an plea to the reader to take caution from his tale.

The presentation is really unique, between all the digital pictures and the photos of real life sketch book art, it really helps re-enforce the themes of 'what is real?' as the story goes through and Tula spirals. The music and the sound effects are all great at immersing the reader, from the simple brushes of leaves to the fires. The writing is probably the most impressive part of this visual novel. It takes a lot of craftsmen ship to be able to write dialog that feels authentic and where each character has their own voice. There was quite a bit of looking up words due to my unfamiliarity with them, but I got the jist of what it was going for. Tula themselves is a really complex and layered character at that, both extremely observant and yet so narrow-minded, such a great choice for a character to follow.

The folklore aspect is incorporated into the story in the way where it's integral to the plot, without having to explicitly state where it's from. Granted I did have to look up the definition for some of the terms and do a bit of research to get the connection, so there's a little homework involved for those not in the know, but once I did, the rest of the story made a lot of sense to me, and I thought it was a really clever way to go about writing this story. In terms of creativity, just really creative use of the sketch book photos to help give even more of the vibe of, I would go so far as to say dissociating, how pulling away from the picture to even seeing the surrounding sketchbook and area that it's in, is just a cool effect and adds even more meaning in some way.

It's crazy that this seems to be a first time VN by Team Dance Mountain, it brings a fresh perspective into the vn space, and a really strong first impression of the type of works that you do. One might wonder if the sketchbook style is a one-off for this visual novel based on the narrative, but seems like y'all have the foundations to craft a VN to suit the story that y'all would want to tell. I can tell that some folks are going to love the verbose style of this VN, with the descriptive prose, the excess of details to flesh out the world and the small character interactions in the story. My only criticism might just be that I would've liked a bit more wolf scenes in relation to the world-building scenes, and even then this is just a nit-pick. Those delusional fantasies are what fuel Tula's obsession, and getting to see one where he gets something out of it would help sell why he's willing to ignore what's in front of him. But, where it is right now, it already gives that implication, so, yeah, I just think this is a great entry.

'A Transforming Night to Remember!' is a light-hearted farce about going cryptid hunting and proceeding to indulge in some very particular kinks/fetishes. What's to say about this particular story other than it's just a fun romp, that almost plays out like a porno-plot, and I don't hate it for that. It also features two fairly uncommon kinks, in transformation into clothing and shrinkage with some macro/micro play. It stands out as being a blatant vehicle to have some fun with the pre-rendered sprites and to stick in as many weird and out-of-pocket moments as they could.

The story starts out with the group of friends going out into a cabin to search for a cryptid known as the "Automated Peacock", which was a clockwork peacock that was created in olden times and has just existed up until today, and he uses his sword cock to put his 'victims' into states of arousal so he may then transform them using automaton magic or something. Then when the suspiciously metallic peacock host goes off to bed, the guys start their cryptid hunt, only for the automatic peacock to start picking them off one by one. Of course, he catches the reader who then can choose to be transformed into something that might help his rocky relationship with his boyfriend (into a pair of underwear or shrunk down micro-size). Either way, the boyfriend finds you, and you have the option to indulge in some pretty hot kinky sex with the transformed you. Then you go looking and find out that the host was the automated peacock the whole time, and that now he has to go into hiding again, now that they know his secret. But, he leaves the reader with the ability to transform so that the reader and his boyfriend can continue to have sexy fun with this new ability.

The presentation really makes as much use as it can out of the pre-rendered sprites and animation to sell the fantasy of a sexy porno that features transformation. Featuring the automaton peacock's sword cock is quite a feat for a jam. Little extra details like zooming in the sprite to simulate being small or putting the blush on the undies to show that it's the character transformed are really cute bits. Even when the friend tanuki was just a cock and balls, really funny moments all around. And that's not to say there wasn't non-sexy funny bits, stuff like the obliviousness to the peacock's true identity or stuff like signing a release form are just fun touches. The writing is fun, it gets a little bit weird in which POV is happening in certain scenes, but overall, was easy enough to follow.

There's the hint of a folklore element in this one, it helps that they told the full story of the cryptid, but I feel like at some points it was taking itself to seriously that it feels disconnected from the overall tone the visual novel is going for. I'd say that you could've really leaned in more into the absurdity of the situation, and played up the humor even more. Part of me thinks you could've used another sprite as a stand-in for the main character, especially since once they get transformed it feels like they suddenly gain a position in the screen instead of being the camera view point. The creativity to just lean into the ridiculous nature of the plot really sold it for me. Seeing the peacock with a sword dick and going "yes, they will use that to cut off the clothes of the other characters anime style" is just a fun scene to watch. I would also suggest maybe to give the friends a bit more distinct personalities, just to help give some texture to the cast. Give them some differing opinions about the kink, just how horny they are, or other little quirks.

I can see that this is a particular interest to this author, and I'm glad that they could indulge it even more in this one. It's fun to see what can be done with the pre-rendered sprites, and I think does a fantastic job of even showing that sexual scenes can still be done, even if there aren't custom cgs made as big splash centerfolds. It seems as long as there's game jams with free assets to be used, there's going to be more of these fun sexy farces, so I hope you continue writing about your favorite kinks, I could see you expanding into other lesser used kinks as well, just for the fun of it.

'Clam Story' is an existential, surreal, and dreamlike recursive story that seems to be a Rorschach test for the reader to implement their own introspective thoughts and feelings as to what the 'true meaning' is actually about. The deceptively simple title and the hand-drawn art betray the intensity of what the story wants to convey to the reader. Is the creature human? Is it a demon? Is this even furry? Is this world based on Earth? Is this a metaphor? Is this a time loop? Do I take this at face value? Is this actually nothing? (Yes and no to all of these questions really.) Does the author care? Does the reader care? Should the reader care? (I just spent an hour of my life that could've been spent reading and reviewing someone else's entry.) Does this author even want me to give it a fair shake? Are they laughing at me? Are the concerned that I don't understand it? Is there some kind of prose that's happening here so profound that it's going over my head? Does it even want me attempting to decipher what it could mean? Is it about environmentalism and global warming? How about a commentary on the ruthlessness of war and sociopolitical environment that cultivates it? Is it a metaphor for mental health? How about the value of art as a concept? Is there a religious angle to it? Maybe it's about love and acceptance? Is it about pointlessness and tragedy? Is it just provoking me in the way you slap someone in the face just to get a reaction?

(I can't answer that.)

The story is about a creature on a beach. A wolf exists. There is a clam. Stuff happens. The world ends. The end.

The presentation is surprisingly competent. The art is very simple and crude, the wolf taking on an almost child-like drawing appearance, yet the backgrounds and text boxes having deliberate animation and text font changes. This gives me the impression that a lot of this is done deliberately by design. Little things like how detailed some of the props are or the drawing of the leaf-god with so many little leaves leads me to believe that there's just a tad too much effort put into this to be a shit-post. Yet, I also know the lengths one would go for a shit-post are far greater than I can reasonably fathom. Is the prose good? IDK. Does it have anything to do with folklore? No. Is it creative? If you consider a rage room to be an artistic creative endeavor, then sure.

Even checking the history of the author, comes up empty. Am I being trolled? I don't know. The author clearly put a lot of effort into the presentation and substantial word count, so does it deserve praise for that alone? Is it hiding behind a facade of obfuscation as to avoid criticism? Is to even attempt to give constructive feedback a fools errand? Am I to be mocked by this? Am I to be shunned for questioning the integrity of the author? Does the author care about integrity to begin with? I've spent a second hour of my time towards trying to provide a proper critique or feedback, so take that time spent as a gift, for any feedback I could give is nothing. I feel like others may appreciate this entry more than me. Good for them.

'Remember the Forefathers' is a dramatic tragedy that examines the purpose of folklore tales within communities and how they can bring peace of mind and hope to those dealing with uncertainty and fear. 'Absolute cinema', is how I'd describe this visual novel entry. It knows what kind of message and tone it wants to set, it gives just enough context and details to immerse the reader, and it develops in a way where the as the narrative goes along, the layers peel back and more and more of the what the reality of the situation is. It leaves a lasting impact, and is extremely effective and efficient with what it needs to convey to give a resolution to this story. It's highly recommended that you read this visual novel going in blind, just to get the authentic experience. I'll be spoiling the climax and the twists and turns as I talk about it, so last chance to go read it if you're looking at the reviews before picking it.

The story itself starts out as if the main character, Lucas, is sitting in a forest, lighting a small pyre/campfire being prepared to talk about a tradition of 'remembering the forefathers'. He seemingly is talking to no one in particular, which is odd, but goes on to ramble about what the traditions mean and what they mean to him. Then comes in the wolf man, who knows Lucas but something is wrong. Turns out that it's the wolf's time to tell a story, and it's about how he was depressed, apathetic, and suicidal, but there was someone who made him feel like he should live towards being alive, very much the savior backstory for these two. Cut back from this really nice flashback, and we're actually in a war torn zone, and not a forest, and Lucas is actually dying after being caught in some kind of collateral damage next to rubble, the pyre actually just a flashlight. The reveal that these are the dying thoughts of Lucas as he reconciles with the unfairness of life and death, and how he faces death with dignity despite it all.

I only summarize it cause it wouldn't do it justice to retell the whole thing, but this is an extremely effective presentation of this story. Everything from the way the start screen only has the start button right at where the pyre is starting, the very creepy and dramatically dark art work with characters having blacked out eyes, the way the CGs are then presented in this black and white sketchy form, to how so much visual storytelling is done through the art itself. Also, the audio design is on point, extremely effective in conveying what's going on with the ambient noises, from crunching leaves, the lighting of the pyre, the gun shots in the distance, it's all combines together into a package that is a multiplicative combination of it's parts. The writing too, it's very evocative, with so many good descriptors in it's prose. The emotion coming through for the wolf in the dialog, the resignation from Lucas. Even the quick cut ending, to really put a period at the end of the story, is just so effective.

The folklore aspect is front and center. In a way, this particular entry makes me scoff at all the folks who claimed that the theme was uninspiring because this is a great example of how folklore is an important aspect of the story, without it being just a simple retelling of a folk tale. It tells a particular folktale, but also gets philosophical about the purpose of them, which is quite a nice bit of introspection. The creativity to put this together and present it in a way is great. There's so many bold choices made for this one, the way that the start screen is built into the narrative, the choice of the sudden ending, the way to present the story one way only to reveal what the true nature was later. This is a great example of knowing what bits are important to the emotional arc, and which bits are important to the plot narrative. We as readers understand the fears of Lucas through what stories he tells himself, and we understand how much Lucas means to the wolf through the story that he told.

If there's any feedback that I would give this for the sake of giving feedback, I think maybe a little bit more detail in grounding the narrative in reality once the reveal has happened. This is more of a personal preference, since I'm sure plenty of the more artsy readers would love reading the subtext between all the details to determine where in the world this would be. The wolf's backstory could be used to help reveal a bit more of who exactly these characters are, rather than speaking in more emotional general terms (the classic 'I was alone, but you came along and made life worth living') maybe play more into the reality of being a war torn area, and that's what could really make it just a bit more impactful when the reveal comes right after. Otherwise, CMoon has made amazing strides in their visual novel entries over the past year, and it's kind of crazy how quickly they've improved in their presentation skills and honing in on their author voice. There's definitely a running theme of embracing the tragedy in his stories, and I wouldn't change that at all, it's a tough skill to be able to write emotionally tiring subject matter. Keep doing what you're doing dude, whether you want to keep doing these darker stories or branching out into other genres, you've got some solid chops.

'Its You Again and Again' is a conceptual romance about a universe jumper who falls in love with the same guy over and over again in the different universes he jumps to. It's an intriguing magic/sci-fi premise that examines the role that the individual has against forces of the universe they have no control over. I really appreciate and love this premise as in fiction it truly takes the concept to an extreme point, "What if you had something so out of your control, that randomly out of nowhere, you literally lose everything and everyone you know and have to make do and survive again from point zero?" How does one have a positive mindset about that? When folks try to offer advice or support, how can one do so without coming off a patronizing or unsympathetic? I'm pretty sure this is reminiscent of a Doctor Who story arc, but aside from that, this story does well to immerse the reader into what it's like following Kali (the main guy), as they grapple with the reality of their situation and look to find happiness and companionship.

The story is deceptively simple, as it starts out with a classic meet-cute, a dinner followed by a hook-up back at the wolf's place. The dinner conversation is interesting as it cuts away to the folklore (of this folklore game jam) which involves the name of a town Pinefall, and how the moral of the story is to take only what you need. Kali is really cagey about his past and why he disappears for lengths of time, and that's because he literally disappears into an alternate universe, where he has to make do and survive with only the clothes on his back (in the first jump he's literally in just his underwear). He ends up doing another meet-cute with a wolf that looks suspiciously like the wolf he went on a date with. It then follows a montage of universe hops, each time running into that world's version of the wolf. Until he finally gets back to the first world and can meet up with the first wolf again a year later. Unfortunately as he's explaining his circumstance and getting accused of lying, he jumps back to his original home universe, a world that succumbed to a zombie apocalypse. Of course he finds his wolf there too, but this one is infected and he has to kill him to keep the host from spreading. Then Kali goes on his dark night of the soul journey giving up on trying to contact his wolf as he continues to jump worlds. Then eventually getting back to the first one again and it all works out, I think.

The presentation is cute and simple, and its surprising how varied the backgrounds and character designs end up being as the story progresses. There's some great shots of tail wagging and the bits where the story shifts into folklore mode are the most impactful parts, in my opinion. The way the puppetry and the storybook quality moments just stand out and have so much character are really great for the resources that you have. The music is simple and effective at setting the mood, even if it's fairly sparse. The moments where the scene changes suddenly is also really impactful as well. The writing quality gets the job done, I don't think I was ever particularly confused about how a scene was going until Kali started getting a little bit 'train of thought' as he monologued about his situation. I will say that the inclusion of the hypnosis element, introduced early to explain how Kali is able to easily survive upon universe jumping by mooching off a random stranger and wiping their memory of him, I expected it to be a more integral part of the story. I suppose that the story was more interested in the struggle of involuntary universe jumping, that it didn't also want to have to grapple with the morality of manipulating people for your own survival, or other pesky reality difficulties like different languages or different cultures.

The folklore element, while I think tied into the story thematically about 'taking what you need' in a sort of selfishly taking his wolf's love and affection, but I don't know how effective it was in combining the two elements. Like, is Kali being punished for upsetting a fey creature? I think there was a conversation about the value of depressing stories vs uplifting stories, and how one may have more value than the other based on who is reading it, but it also never quite settles on answering that question, instead just letting the story play out and making the reader decide if it was uplifting or depressing. The story itself is definitely the most creative aspect of this visual novel, as it's a crazy concept, and there's a lot of details that could really make this story not work if you look too closely at the details, but I think it also works well as a metaphor for just any other kind of unfortunate situation where the person has no agency in how it happens to them. It's one of those stories that is so unrealistic that it asks the reader to suspend their disbelief in order to ponder what could reasonably be done and how would one actually respond to such an terrible circumstance.

It's great to see KnowIt continue to make visual novels in his unique style, always coming up with the wildest plot devices and worlds for his characters to exist in. This one is a step up, I feel since it tells a complete story within the bounds of the game jam on an interesting premise. Something that I would offer to consider is exploring that cut-out puppet style of art in one of your future visual novel projects. It came across really effectively, and I think you could do something really interesting expanding on that particular art style. An entire VN in that style could stand out crazy in another game jam you might do. Writing wise, I would say you're really good at having these crazy premises, but then I think you end up ignoring some of the natural conflicts and friction that those premises would bring up. While some mysteries don't always need to be solved in order to tell the story you want to tell, they can end up feeling like plot conveniences if there isn't some kind of rule system for them. Still, the core of the story is that a kindhearted soul can come in many forms, but still at it's core be good, and I think that's a worthwhile theme to express

'My Tainted Life' is the first chapter in what looks to be an adventure story not unlike many of the RPG video games that it draws inspiration from. It follows a runaway prince-priest who, a wielder of healing magic, is trying to escape his role as the army's heal bot to go and experience the freedom of the world. It's gives some realism to the video-game-y aspects of healing and how valuable that skill would be in a society to the point that those that could wield it would be locked up and used for the sheer benefit they provide to the rest of the community at large. It's an intriguing line of reasoning that said persons would be looked at less than people and more as tools as they are denied their ability to lead a life that they could choose.

The story follows the prince-priest, Manfrey, as he's on the verge of running away from the city, and in doing so will be labeled a deserter, and bounty pages would be placed around to guarantee his return. However, before Manfrey can get too far, he's immediately tracked down by Chris/Moon Blade/the general of the army/one of the highest leveled characters in the city to bring him back. Chris is what you would call a tool, in a figurative and literal sense, which follows orders and doesn't question anything about it, and is bringing back Manfrey because he was ordered to by his prince brother. Of course, Chris hides his power-level until a powerful tainted mob shows up to start wrecking the place, and then suddenly there's the big clash of ideals between Manfrey and Chris. What's more important, the use that one can bring to their community by playing their designated role or is it better for the individual to decide how best to use their own talents for the greater good? Obviously, Manfrey is going to use his healing powers where he can, as he easily gives up his cover so he can help the citizens and guards who defended the tavern against an attack, but Chris says that being on the front lines is not where he should be and instead just leave the fighting to the fighters and healing to the healers. They never really come to an agreement, and they really shouldn't cause this is just the opening chapter, and it seems to want to lead into a fuller exploration into an RPG level story for this fighter-priest's journey into becoming a paladin.

The presentation is extremely high quality, as expected from Team Eclipse, they've got so many good artists, musicians, programmers and designers that it's so polished, even for a month creation. The UI and loading screens are all fantasy themed, all the backgrounds are evocative, and even the special moment CGs really give weight in the story where it's needed. The healing kisses, the duel and the big fight against the tainted monster, all painted with amazing quality. Sound design is great. Character sprites are great, love the border-less style. Really, there's hardly anything to complain about when it comes to the actual visual and immersive experience with this one. The writing is good, it's carries the plot along well. It'll change view points a few times which, going from the prince, to the blacksmith, and back to the prince, which can be a bit disorienting, but I understand why it was done, so that the reader can understand how Chris was able to find him so quickly, but part of me wonders if that extra scene was needed, as perhaps the introduction of Chris as coming off as this undercover adventurer with a hidden agenda would've been more impactful, if we didn't already know who he was when Manfrey first meets him. While I love the idea that a stronger healing spell includes kisses on the cheek and the mouth, the way that the story seemed to then lean into the lovey-dovey section with Manfrey and Chris, the laying and cuddling afterwards and the affectionate talk between them, seems to come out of left field. A bit too early in the story to be alluding towards a romantic connection, when up to that point, Chris has been emotionally detached and Manfrey has all but been annoyed and distrustful of Chris lying to him and wanting to take away his freedom. The way that the story will continue as the start of this adventuring party, now with a healer and a fighter, it does give promise for what new fun characters and potential party members will be joining, as well as just how they'll be taking on this larger threat of 'the tainted' across their land.

As for the folklore theme, the story is very fantasy-rpg game based, so it's influenced by several of the hallmarks of the genre. Fantasy fights with tainted monsters, magical powers for healing and offense, a status based hierarchy, etc. It doesn't really try to frame the story using any specific folklore, nor does it try to introduce a custom piece of folklore for the setting, so this story definitely feels more like a personal project that happened to aligns somewhat with the theme, and that's fine by me. As long as it spurs the creation of a new VN, then I'm happy, even though I'd probably rate it lower on that particular measure. I don't know how creative I would call this, as it's doesn't seem to be breaking new ground, and I'm not mad at it for taking a tried and true set up and doing their own spin on it. All the assets to make this are of very high quality, and in that there is inherent creativity, but the combined product is a sum of it's parts.

Overall, another really high quality and polished entry into the game jam from Team Eclipse. It's a real skill that they're able to complete such visual novels while managing such a large team and not somehow end up with feature bloat or mismanaged efforts. Scope management is also something that I applaud because especially with the idea of having a much larger novel in mind and only completing a single chapter, it's tough, because the chapter has to have a small arc of it's own, while still letting the story have room to grow. Plus, it does do a good job in introducing all the new concepts and characters to the readers in an efficient and meaningful way. It is still just a chapter, so I tend to err on the side of caution as it can be easy to throw a bunch of ideas into early chapters and leave it unfinished so as to never have to worry about resolving any of the introduced ideas. So I only hope that when this story is continued, these elements are kept in mind. Fun read!

'Encounters in the Moonlight' is a meet-cute into sexy-times scene, with a bit of a familiar 'overcoming homophobia' character arc. It's one more of those entry point stories about being gay, getting ostracized by your family and community, only to be rescued by a big hot wolfman who immediately finds you attractive and you have hot intercourse under the moonlight. The story does some interesting world-development for a scene, as it alludes to a significant technological and culture difference between Solus and Lucius, the two characters.

The way the story goes is that Solus is on Earth during an era of tribalism, goes out into the forest, gets attacked by a beast and is rescued by Lucian, who's from the moon, is alluded to have been a highly scientific space colony from when the Earth had undergone some kind of Armageddon and now they're coming back to see if the world is hospitable again. It's a fun dynamic, which gives a bit of 'Star Trek' first contact vibes, plus bringing in a lot of modern cultural advancements to contrast with the more primitive culture of shunning homosexuality. There's some revelations given to Solus, who gets to fully embrace his inner feelings, and get to go visit the moon with Lucius who is really interested in him. It's a satisfying wish-fulfillment kind of story.

The presentation is really nice. The color aesthetic is consistent throughout, the art sprites are emotive and fun, there's drawn backgrounds and cgs, and can't forget about the custom cg sex scene which is the big wow-factor of the whole visual novel. There's also a lot of detail that goes into making the sprites blink and even have mouth movements for the speaking parts (that takes quite a bit of effort and knowhow). Overall it's a really impressive visual package that is probably some of the highest quality I've seen in this game jam. The writing is adequate for getting the two characters to meet 'n fuck. I'm not gonna lie and say that this is the most original set up or plot-line, the one detail of the Earth culture and Moon culture was the aspect that gave it something to stand out, otherwise, it's very much a classic gay coming out/angst story. You get a couple of weird incongruent story elements like how his first lover gets exiled, but he doesn't because special treatment just cause he's the important family's son. He begs to stay and feels a sense of loyalty to his tribe despite how badly they treat him and openly say how much they want him gone. It feels like while the story is a feel good framework, it doesn't do much other than to give a reason for the really good art and sex scene to exist. It's not a bad thing, and it's probably going to be someone's first experience with this kind of storyline (I've done plenty). It could make stronger choices in how it plays out to help it distinguish itself from other stories exactly like this, but I also imagine that as it's only this scene, the scope was limited to not further explore other details. We're told how the village treats Solus through a novel style monologue from him, and we're told about what the moon is like through Lucius explaining to Solus what it is. The plot device of the wolf beast is just so Lucius can save Solus, and the beast is never explained further. It might be stronger to show the scene happening where Solus is caught the first time to give a more viseral experience to connect with him better. While, Solus is the POV, you could always change view points to Lucius as he saves Solus and get a sense of Lucius in that way. Just as some suggestions/examples.

The folklore element of the visual novel I believe is the in-story folklore of the moon-god and how Solus believes Lucian to be of the moon come to take him to paradise. It's a cute way to tie in a religious element into the plot. As it's only one or two scenes, there's not much opportunity to explore that element further or how Solus's beliefs are completely shaken by finding out that his folklore/religion might be just stories and not fact (that might've been an interesting theme to explore). Creativity wise, there's some interesting seeds of ideas here. What's present however is kind of stock gay-angst wish-fulfillment which I will always welcome more of that into the world. The sex scene, while hot, also still is a sex scene.

From what I can see, this is a first timer entry, and for that, big props for completing it and giving it a really good polish. It's very pretty and it's a treat for the eyes. The writing gets the job done, and if it gives you the confidence to try to push yourself further next time, then I'll be happy. I'd say read a bunch of the VNs from these game jams to expand your reference pool for furry stories, see what elements you can pick up from them and see how you can incorporate those bits into your works in the future.

'The Badger's Moon' is a melancholic and serene slice-of-life story about an arranged marriage and the internal conflicts that come with reconciling with such conflicting emotions. It deals with the emotions of love, guilt, vulnerability,  being honest, and having the difficult talks that come with agreeing to be someone's life-partner. It does a really good job of grounding the situation, even if the cultural practice may seem out-of-time, it treats it with respect and from a point of practical realism.

The story of Brock and William is presented as the 'working through it' phase of an arranged marriage. Brock being the stoic and emotionally distant badger who accepted the marriage because he wanted a partner and was offered one through an arrangement, but now is feeling guilt ridden because the marriage was arranged and he can't bring himself to believe that William is fully happy with the arrangement. William on the other hand, agreed to be a part of the arrangement though a sense of cultural tradition, since as a wasgo (i think that's hybrid whale/wolf), his culture is one where wasgos are just married off like that because it brings the receiving family good luck and fortune. Though, as a result of the situation, William had to leave his home country to go live with Brock, away from his family and his then-lively hood as a hockey player. What then proceeds in the story is the slice of life moments where the two try to communicate with each other, bonding over mundane daily activities, and preparing to do a badger family cultural tradition that William wants to be apart of. When they finally start doing the tradition together, does Brock finally open up to have the difficult conversation of his inner-conflict of wanting a partner, but knowing that it may have taken Brock away from his path in life. Of course, William is an understanding guy and offers that he wants to make the marriage work in spite of that, and that they would need to work at it to make it work. The story is really serene and heartwarming as the two men are able to overcome their own inner turmoil to be able to commit towards making this marriage work.

The presentation is simple yet effective. The custom character sprites are cute and I love the extra detail you put into it by even having the wasgo have his tail wag. The custom cgs are great focal points, and the music choices are restrained enough to give just the right amount of ambiance to the scenes. The writing style is good. It does shift perspectives a few times, which I don't hate getting to be in the headspace of both characters, but I feel like if you were going to have the two different POVs, to maybe give a bit more time to William, since this story does seem to be primarily about Brock. I also feel like it took a little bit of narrative work to justify why these two got married in the first place, with it seeming like it was their parents ideas, but also Brock feeling partially responsible for it, while William is all for it yet. I feel like there could be a stronger narrative reason for the two men to be 'stuck' as the story would put it. It's mentioned that wasgo's are married into families as good luck, but for what business purpose did it serve? I can speculate that it might be Brock's work/company, or maybe there's a family business that needed the boost in luck? It seems a little weak as a justification. I get that Brock wants to be a reluctant participant, but there should be a narrative plot motivation that outweighs his initial concerns just barely. There's also the surprise twist that it ended up a same-sex marriage, which muddies that motivations even more. I feel like while you really wanted to focus on this spouse dynamic, a little more work put into the set up/situation would've helped it feel more believable, especially since it is rather random that a badger guy in Scotland and a hockey player wasgo from Canada end up in an arranged marriage. Like for this story, it feels like Brock and William only adhering to tradition blindly without thinking about the consequences or what that would entail. Yet, during the story they never question this blind adherence to tradition even though it's both making them feel guilt ridden about it.

That being said, it is a unique scenario that I would never have seen coming, so that's pretty creative. The folklore aspect is also really sweet, as framing the Gealach a' Bhruic as a bonding experience and the way for the two to share a cultural tradition is heartwarming (plus badger guy with the badger's moon tradition, that's cute). I remember how last year's game jam you did 'A Knight's Myosotis', and I remember that one being a bit longer and wordy, while this one you've really done a good job of distilling the story down to it's emotional essentials, which is the important bits. It's definitely a great improvement in the presentation and writing chops, and so now it's more of seeing what other fun ways to can enhance the reading experience. I'd suggest one thing to keep in mind is making sure that you know what your character's backstory is, as you don't always need to give a monologue about it, but know what about their past influences the way the make choices and the way they act in the present. Try to keep an idea of what your thematic throughline is, and what the message of your story might be saying. You're making steady improvements, and you're branching out to different genres, keep doin' that.

'I Will Haunt You' is a tragic novella about a ghost who haunts his boyfriend. It's quite a somber and sober look at not what it means to move on from something that is over. It's a simple story, but I think one that's distilled down to capturing just the essence of what the message of the story is trying to present.

The story centers around Beckett, a ghost, who was killed three years ago, and how he hasn't moved on from the mortal plane, instead staying and 'haunting' his boyfriend Rhett. Beckett tries to be a helpful ghost, moving things into useful places, and keeping watch over Rhett, but Rhett's still depressed. Then Beckett gets a new boyfriend and suddenly Rhett's starting to be happy again, but Beckett's jealous and distraught, still clinging to wanting to be with Rhett even through he's unable to actively be there physically for him. The reader then gets three options on how to respond to this revelation. One ending is one where he becomes vengeful and lashes out to scare away the new boyfriend, only to end up scaring away Rhett in the process. Another bad ending is where he also falls into despair, which ends up creating a space where Rhett pushes away his new boyfriend, thus leaving them together again, but alone and still miserable. The good ending is the one where Beckett accepts the finality of their situation and allows Rhett to continue to be happy without him, while he moves on as well, no matter how scary it may be. And like, that's all the surface level plot, but like a good fable it's got some fun interpretations or allusions that could be made. Replace the death of Beckett into any other situation in which this relationship could've ended and it gives a really compelling demonstration of the pitfalls of ruminating over a failing or ending relationship. The endings showing that how a person reacts to the situation matters, and can shape how that person experiences it.

The presentation is really good, the character sprites are expressive and simple, yet with bold but not gruesome details. Beckett's design of his bloodied shoulders from his neck is surprisingly tasteful. The art for the backgrounds and cgs are really good at conveying the moods of the scenes. The little animations that the sprite have add to the immersion. The music and sounds are adequate. The writing is simple, but effective. It's really good in how the three different endings all have their distinct voices, especially since it's such a singular character focused story. I appreciate the addition of letting the reader go back to the pivotal choice to pick a different path to experience it. The situation is non-descript as it needs to be in order to focus on the primary emotional conflict, Beckett wanting to be the only one who can help Rhett, when he himself is unable to be what Rhett needs.

As for the folklore element, I think this is a take on a classic ghost story/haunted house but from the view point of the ghost. I think I can think of a few haunted house stories that follow both the haunted and the haunters, so focusing solely on just the ghost makes it stand out a bit more. It makes me feel like it was a good starting point for the ghost-haunting-element, but it makes me wonder if you might've been able to find a ghost-story that you could connected it to better encapsulate the folk-lore element. I will offer that this is a solid entry for a game jam with a very manageable scope, and it checks all the boxes (bonus points for probably the best itch page design, it goes so hard), especially for a first time entry and what looks to be a first time solo project for you. Really nice showing. Looking forward to seeing what happens when you expand that scope a bit more, stuff like lengthening the plot and narrative, playing around with the structure of the story. This one works from the POV from the ghost, but it could also really work well from the POV of Rhett being haunted by his house and turning it into a mystery of why he's haunted. You've got a good foundation, so you can start experimenting.

'Jane Doe' is a drama/thriller about a guy falling in love with a psychopath. And I don't really mean that in a hyperbolic or inflammatory way, it more of what's on the label. It's got the suspense, it's got the drama, it's got me thinking of Beastars in terms of the dynamic between the deer main character and the wolf love interest. It does a good job of leaving the reader on the edge of their seat, but I wonder if it has the hooks to keep folks wanting to come back and see more.

It should be said that this is somewhat of a first act of a larger story, as we get the introduction to the two main characters, we get a meet-cute, and then we get the first date and the first big twist of one of the characters. We've got our main protagonist deer man, Lucan, a dejected CEO/higherup business man who's in a loveless marriage and lacks an emotional support system, meets the love interest wolf, Ren, a quirky, eccentric, and energetic flower shop owner who seems to appear to help bring the brooding, mundane protagonist out of his dark depressing life (literally parting the rainy clouds for a ray of sunshine). Of course, the big twist is that they're actually a manipulative psychopath who's done this before to other men, to blackmail them out of their money or worse. And suddenly, we can't trust anything that this wolf has presented as their personality. Are they really quirky and fun, or is it just a mask so they can get their next fix? Is any of what they say about their melancholic backstory true, or is it just lies to make other people sorry for them to drop their guard? Whether or not this turns into a redemptive romance or a cautionary horror story, well, it's still too early to say, since it's just the first act. That being said, it's a solid start to the narrative and it does make the pit your stomach just fall when you read it.

The presentation is really striking. The combination of close up sketchy outlines for internal monologues, and the simple character sprites make an effective way to convey the mood of a scene. At first I was going to mention how hard it is to make out some of the facial expressions on the wolf, only being to make out the eyes and mouth when they're open, until I got to the twist and realized it was likely on purpose, just to add in that element of not being able to tell what this wolf is thinking. Even as far as them being such an ambiguous gender. It's super solid in the music and atmospheric sound effects. I think it does a few ren'py dialog box tricks where it'll move past a line to show that it's being cut off as you're reading it and the other character is interrupting. It does get a little bit heavy handed with the imagery and the metaphors. The title of the story being "Jane Doe", reference to unidentified victims of crime and with a deer character, the ray of sunshine on the wolf in the rain, the spider lilies of the Dead End Flower Shop. It's just setting up the scene for a 'true crime podcast episode'.

The writing itself is serviceable. The dialog can feel a little bit stiff, and when the big reveal happens, it does get a little bit 'villain monologuing'. I believe the folklore tale that was incorporated into this story is the tale of the 'boy who cried wolf', which is an interesting connection to try to marry to the current plot, as I'm not sure who is the boy in this metaphor. It's a little bit more 'wolf in sheep's clothing' type of tale. Does it feel a little clunky to add into the plot be it only being part of the first date between the two? Kind of. Though I will say that the idea of transforming one of Aesop's classic tales into a contemporary drama story is a cool and creative premise, especially if you're going in aiming for a psychopathic villain type of plot. I don't know if this story quite reaches that mark, if that's what this was aiming for at all. 

Overall, it's a pretty good first timer jam entry. There's a lot of stylization and the art is great. The story will be gripping and interesting for some, but after seeing the reveal, I don't know if I need to read the rest to speculate what might happen. It is only the first act, so I can't give too much on feedback on what can or should happen should you continue to work on this and expand this to it's full conclusion. I'd say the biggest questions for me story wise, are eventually wanting to find out what the motivation and goal of Ren is, seems like this might be shrouded in mystery on purpose though. What's to become of Lucan, both in physical and emotional health. And what's the thematic through-line that this story is meant to have? Is it that blind trust is a virtue? That the meek shall be consumed by the wicked? Can someone be called wicked if it is just their base nature? Does everyone truly get what's coming to them? If you were hoping to make this more of a cliffhanger, I would suggest keeping the cards closer to your chest, maybe have the confrontation in the alley way just be another opportunity to sow uncertainty with Lucan walking in on the situation and getting two conflicting stories. Just something to keep in mind.

Bro is frontin' y'all. 'ithinkitslikesomeisekaiwattpadthingidk' (or is the movie called 'Anubis College'? whatev) is a meta-humorous false-film parody of 'My Wolf' visual novels, furry visual novels in general, and way too much poking fun at the uncs by tormenting them with Gen Z/Alpha/slop slang and vernacular. And in spite of it's attempt to come off as an incompetent rush job, there is a surprising amount of depth to the jokes and the layers to poking fun at the popular visual novel tropes in a 'if you know, you know' kind of way. It's both self-aware that it's presenting itself as a mockery of furry visual novels, but the amount of research and knowledge about them needed to accurately pin point the jabs let's you know that this was written by someone who cares about visual novels a lot.

I really have to appreciate the story and framing of this visual novel. It's established early that this is actually a story about a group of college students (film students maybe) who are shooting a movie in a month (game jam reference), and said movie is an isekai story about [insert protagonist name], a human, who is brought down into Duat (Egyptian underworld) because he's actually an anubis this whole time and now he's the Prince to an Anubis dad and he has to go to Anubis College to study and win his father's favor to become the new king because he has a younger brother who is also aiming for the throne. Following? It's okay if you're not, none of it actually happens, as there's frequent moments of fourth-wall breaking as the characters are fully self-aware of the caricatures they're playing as, straight up reading from scripts and poking all the holes in the plot and giving nu-gen quippy humor. No secret, this biggest parody this is of is Adastra, but there's jabs at other furry vns too, Lyre for falling in love with a knight who is assigned to protect you, I think one might've been Cho-Pro for the clothing choice scene, and I want to say the plethora of college based furry vns and this one just being another college setting. There's even a "cut to the final scene because we're running out of time" with a lot of funny bickering about how they have to skip over the sex scene, which is like, the most important part of a vn. The fact that there are three endings based on which outfit you pick, is hilarious, in that each of the endings is also like, just as entertaining as the last, as they all end in tragedy, but in their own unique ways. It even ends on a joke, as the drama is forced, there's a lack of any real weight to the finale, and it just ends with all the actors patting each other on the back sayin' how they might come back to film the missing scenes, but whatev cut to credits.

The presentation is nothing to scoff at either. Like, don't let the broken menu fool the particular craft in making it look 'this' busted. And even then, it's actually not 'that' busted. The character sprites are really good: jackal family, wolf knight, and the fox guy all are all expressive and give off so much character. The backgrounds are immersive, there's even some sketches of CGs for the ending, which is so good in conveying the whole "running out of time to finish this" running joke (happy accident that the 'image not found' made me laugh more than be annoyed). The bits where they have to cut the filming because something unhinged happened or they need to re-shoot a scene are always great visual gags. The audio does it's j*b what it needs to do.

I need to talk about the writing, because I both hate it, that's it's so grammatically incorrect and narratively 'wrong', but love that it commits to the bit so hard and consistently that I know that it's a conscious choice being made. I know you know how to write, because there are characters that do speak in complete sentences and times when the slang is left out. There is something so oddly refreshing about character's being aware of the tropes they're based off of. But also how each character, in spite of their dialog being full of slang, they each come across as distinct characters? And like, as actors playing characters too? There is so much vocabulary anachronicity that it's just a funny running gag at that point. Favorite bits and lines are "can't you see I'm trying to create conflict here" and "we've undergone like 0 character development" and "the past four years and five book/movies/visual novels".

This is really creative, not that parodies and false films haven't been done before, but how instead of making fun of a particular visual novel like some parodies have in the past, but like, pokes fun at the language of the furry visual medium as a whole. Pointing out the in unimportance of the protagonist's previous life yet how they keep reminding you of it, the absolute forced drama because a character is just overwhelmingly evil, the way that certain social structures like an aristocratic class and slavery has some stuff there that needs to be unpacked, and even the constant dunking on human characters. Funny enough, this fits really well in the folklore category being based on the Egyptian myth of Anubis and references to other literary works in here, so it's like, there was creative intent and this wasn't some fluke.

I'm going to say, looking at who is behind this (kaz and blacklight), I did not know that this collaboration would work so well, and I'm so glad that y'all put something like this together. Blacklight from those comedy chops that I remember from 'One Way or Another' and Kaz's unhinged prose waxing with 'First Winds'. Such a funny and new perspective on the contemporary visual novel scene, still putting together a somewhat coherent plot even if it was 'Adastra but with jackals', and just finding a way to make a meal out of every line. I don't know if Nu-Gen stylized comedies are going to be your go-to when you next make a visual novel or if you're going to branch out into other genres or try for another original story, but it's crazy how much improvement happened from the first game jam to this game jam. Keep workin' on that scope bloat and time management skills, y'all cut it close.

'Wolf in Sheep's Clothing' is an unnerving suspense drama that portrays some heavy and serious subject matter through a deceptively innocent looking veneer. It's an interesting effect of having this type of story be told through the stylization of an simpler and cuter art style as it does throw the reader off balance once the first sting of dread hits and suddenly the juvenile presentation starts to show that there's a darker story being told here.

That being said, I think the story here is actually really intriguing and has quite a few layers of it. To speak plainly about the plot is to spoil the reveal, but I'd like to talk about it, so spoilers for those that haven't played it. The narrative angle is really strong. Having the main story be about a sheep girl who's been sexually abused by her older brother guardian and then using her to lure other girls for him to then sexually assault is a very intense premise (the 'wolf in sheep's clothing' being a predator sheep). There's a lot of really evocative moments that really sell the intensity of the situation. The way Mary dissociates a lot, the rigidity to her thought process, the absolute deference of agency to her brother, the culpability in assisting her brother, and even the resentment to the other girls that her brother targets. There's even a weirdly sinister worshiping of the older brother as he's introduced, which helps paint the picture that while his actions are reprehensible, he must hold a level of charm and charisma that he's able to get away with seducing Mary's classmates. The introduction of the folklore theme being the Greek gods, especially with Zeus and Hera as a not so subtle metaphor for this story, does help confirm to the reader that this is 'that' kind of story. What I find interesting as well is how Lucy changes depending on how Mary answers her question in the one branching choice. If you pick Lie, the story proceeds with the luring and seemingly 'lamb to the slaughter' type of scene where Lucy gets deceived, while on the Truth side, you find out that Lucy is aware of what's going on and isn't actually completely against being prospected. On the truth end, it feels like Lucy then takes pity on Mary and we find out that Mary actually doesn't care about the girls who get prospected, but that she's got this possessiveness to her brother and doesn't want to share with other girls. It's a surprisingly candid and tragic take on the story dynamic. 

The presentation, as simple as it is, is surprisingly effective at showing the disconnect between the seriousness of the subject material and the way the characters treat the subject material. The audio cues work well in giving that change in tension whenever a new detail is revealed, and it uncovers the next dark layer to the story. I do think that some more care could've been put into the transitions between scenes, as they seem to just flash in an instant, as well as the initial music coming in without any fade in, though part of me wonders if that's intentional or a happy accident that it adds to the choppy perspective of the main character who dissociates. I would say the same thing about the writing and prose, which feels very unrefined. There's some weird sentence structures, and a couple of places where it feels like there should be commas are missing and it ends up looking like run-ons. Once again, part of me wonders if this is intentional or a happy accident that it adds to the deteriorating and juvenile thought process that Mary has. While I think that the story ends at the appropriate point for each of the two choices, the ending does come very abruptly and that's what leads me to believe some of these choices are more like happy accidents that benefited the story. Adding in some kind of slow fade to back into a credit sequence or a sense of closure to the narrative leading into the end would help a lot in signaling the end of the story instead of the quick cut to the main menu.

Creatively, the thing that stood out to me the most was the audacity of tackling a story line like this. It's a touchy subject and could easily come off tasteless if not handled well, and I think you handled it with the appropriate amount of depiction without glorification. Otherwise, there's not too much else here to judge on, but I do think that the sprites for Lucy and Mary are very cute, and the backgrounds do their job of placing the characters in a setting. While I could see the folklore reference with the Greek myths, it does feel more like a foot-note, since it's not entirely a one-to-one metaphor with the Zeus story, since while Hera does punish the women that Zeus sleeps with, Hera doesn't actively help Zeus with sleeping around.

It's actually quite interesting, because I remember the author's previous game jam work, and that also dealt with mature topics. This one feels like an improvement in the narrative flow and letting the plot develop more naturally. If I were to offer some feedback, it would be to look into finding different ways to enhance the reader experience. Title page art, utilizing the visual medium more with different scene transitions or moving the character sprites around, playing around with the text visuals. On the writing end, looking into single line edits to see if there are stronger ways to convey the idea you're getting across. This was a surprising entry, and there's a lot of room for growth and potential, I would just like to be sure that there are deliberate artistic choices being made rather than it just working out for this particular story.

'The Games We Play' is an erotic romantic farce where a guy goes from getting cheated on by his ex to sleeping with her dad. It shines in both it's premise not being entirely porn-plot where stuff happens because it would be hot, but the narrative is spun in a way where I can believe where what started out as a revenge plot turned into an exploration of a man's sexuality. The erotica is also really well done as well, with some great moments of teasing and foreplay before getting into the big climax.

The story is cleverly constructed, especially on the character arc that Ezra goes on. He goes from straight guy trying to hurt his girlfriend who hurt him, to forging a friendship with her father, to questioning his sexuality and attraction to her father, to fully committing to his bisexuality. I'm familiar with a lot of older man/younger man dynamics in comic and art forms, so it's nice to see it also have a very nice visual novel representation. Framing the story and characters as a bunch of nerdy guys that are into DnD and LARPing also is a clever way to incorporate the pre-rendered sprite's costumes. All the characters feel like they are their own flavor of socially awkward nerd, which helps establish the bit plot misunderstandings and mishaps. The group encouraging Ezra to make it look like he's dating his ex's father, and then following it up with taking the picture because they don't know Ezra's started to be genuine is classic rom-com 'shoe-dropping'. All the story beats were good, though I feel like the LARPing section was the weakest, at least in terms of it being used as a filter for Ezra and Harvey to flirt and make their 'roleplay confessions'. Perhaps it was the self-deprecating nature of the roleplay, or the lack of a structure to it, where events just happened in order to happen. Even after the lowest point where Ezra goes back to the roleplay area, Harvey also just shows up as well, while a bit too plot convenient, I think there might've been a stronger choice somewhere in how to get the two of them back together. That being said, once the two of them are together is some really hot scenes which are the highlights of the story. You get a little bit of everything, from the solo jerk session, to the casual nudity, to the full on sex scene with a bit of dirty talk in there. Part of me wants feels like Harvey's role and personal motivation in the story does get a bit muddy, especially with how eager he is to spend time with Ezra in the beginning watching movies, fully putting on a revealing armor costume and then sharing a shower with Ezra, to so easily talking sexual advice, makes me assume that Harvey was also very much flirting and trying to get with his daughter's ex boyfriend, though never fully having him come out to say it. Then again, maybe that's just the subtext that I'm reading into much and intentional.

The presentation is serviceable, with the classic pre-rendered sprites on stock backgrounds and some really good usage of sprite movements and zooming into the right spots for immersive point of views. Audio work was also adequate, never feeling like it distracted and helped enhance the reading experience. The character voices really shined through the writing prose, with Ezra being that angsty hot-head and Harvey being the wizened and self-assured old man. As mentioned before, I think the LARPing section is the place where I felt the writing struggling to find a way for Harvey to find out about the revenge plot while also deepening the attraction that Ezra had for Harvey. The erotic scenes through? Great. I have no notes for how those played out, I thoroughly enjoyed them.  That being said, I do think you could've played around more creatively with the sex scenes. While I don't hate a straight-forward erotic scene of two men exploring each other's bodies, there was so many opportunities for some creative use of costumers in the sex scenes, or maybe some more sexually charged mishaps like the "can you help me unbuckle my cod-piece" moment. Let the nerds have some nerdy sex.

As for the folklore element, I think that might've been where you were trying to incorporate the folklore into the LARPing portion and didn't come off as strong as it could have. Trying to fit a folklore element into plot of what is a rom-com involving sleeping with a dad is a tall order, but I do admire the effort. Overall, this is a solid entry amongst the other game jam entries you've done in the past, and I'm glad to see that it indulges an erotic dynamic that isn't seen as much as others. Great use of the pre-rendered sprites as usual, though I could see the difficulties of trying to write a plot that captures all the themes and ideas into one visual novel. I'd say keep on indulging in your kinks and interests when making these visual novels, the passion shows and it'll attract the right collaborators into wanting to bring your ideas to the next level.