Play book
The Igniting Spark's itch.io pageResults
Criteria | Rank | Score* | Raw Score |
Adherence to Theme | #1 | 4.429 | 4.429 |
Overall | #3 | 4.000 | 4.000 |
Concepts & Originality | #7 | 4.048 | 4.048 |
Flow & Clarity | #20 | 3.524 | 3.524 |
Ranked from 21 ratings. Score is adjusted from raw score by the median number of ratings per game in the jam.
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Comments
Congratulations on placing in the OPR Writing Jam #12!
To claim your prize email marketing@onepagerules.com with the subject "Writing Jam Winner."
Excellent use of the theme, and great atmosphere building over such a short span. I liked everything about this.
Excellent use of the theme, and great atmosphere building over such a short span. I liked everything about this.
Enjoyable, good use of the theme and well-paced.
I think it needed more time to build up the intrigue it could've had based on the concept, but I suppose that's the limitation of the writing jam. It very much feels like the prelude to a grander story.
Very nicely crafted, and definitely nailed the theme!
This was great! Loved the concept and snapshot of the scene. Well written and enjoyable to follow!
Interesting plot twist, but the narrative could be clearer, at the end specially.
Thanks for the feedback! Could you elaborate on what wasn’t clear enough?
Sure. A minor one is I quite didn't get the relation between the gear of the prisoner and what it does at first. But the thing if find quite discordant is the capabilities to mobilize of the guard, according to perceived rank, and the called help itself (something from hdf lists, perhaps?).
Nice with the reveal.
One of the highlights of the jam so far - an imaginative premise that you executed well. Jonathan falling under the Saurian's sway as he powers up his implants was a great moment.
The moment where the saurian explained his plan, was such a cool aha! moment.
The story was interesting, but I am not exactly sure what happened at the end. I do dig the idea of the Saurian using his own starvation to initiate his salvation. Very cool turnabout.
Thanks for your feedback, I have revised it to make it clearer.