I want to make some video games, been wanting. By my own I have not made anything, I haven't practiced much of anything. Possibly art in pixels, but I can do more, I have a digital tablet and Blender, Unity, and photoshop essentials 2018, Krita. 

   I need to get into something, because mostly I'm playing sims 4 or take care of my toddler with my mom. I don't have what it takes to do make one on my own. I would like working with coding, I don't want cheap out on working with code. I didn't study programing, I couldn't match up well with math. I never learned to do math so quick that the exam needs. It's not convenient enough to get tutored math as an adult, not for me. 

   It's too difficult getting into Godot, I really don't want to use it. It's possible that me avoiding Godot won't be forever, but I have so much already I don't use much. I want to settle what I do. Let's start out a casual developing together. Practicing where I can't swim yet.

try unity

An easy way to find your way into game-making is using RPG Maker from Degica. It still needs some getting used to but there are a lot of tutorials. You also have some basic sprites for making environments and NPCs.  It specializes in the genre "Role Playing Games" (RPG); if you want to make another type of game you will need a more suitable engine.

If you are really serious about creating a game, I'd advise to gather a budget and hire people to help you create what you want. Hobby/Rev-share projects never turn out well in 99.9% of cases.

In case you have spare budget for audio, feel free to get in touch with me, I can help you out with music and sound design. 

Here's my portfolio: https://www.youtube.com/@ApocalypticUniverse

You can contact me via Discord: world_creator#9524

Try godot.

It's easy and efficient 

Well, beginnings are always the hardest. I would say the first 300 hours with Unity and C# are the most challenging. After that, it's still hard because you're facing even more difficult problems, but at that point, you can perform the vast majority of simple tasks on a whim, which feels pretty amazing. Finding a right group of people could be a great starting point to help you motivate yourself. Then just stick to simple stuff and before you know you will be doing harder parts too. Just dont give up if you really feel like doing something could make you feel happy. :)