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Yup, we've had multiple comments about the background textures,  it definitely needs a fix. Thank you for your comments!

By background images do you mean the textures behind the text boxes, or are you referring to the cover art and drone?

That makes sense about the chance of the objective being there. The wording about chance to be found made me think it meant found by the players, but you mean chance to be located there at all. I think changing the verb would definitely clarify.

Ya, conveying what background info the PCs know has been an evolving problem. We didn't have room to separate the warden knowledge and the PC knowledge,  and have tried several different solutions to the in line text. Test readers like yourself have continued to give us useful feedback,  so hopefully we can still find the best solution. 

I think you have a good point about the warden advice.

Thank you very much for your comments!

Thank you for your comment! Does h1 mean the header font? Just want to make sure I am understanding correctly

This fucking rips. The decoherence table is the coolest thing I've read in the whole jam so far. Normally I'm not a fan of maps in trifolds, but I think it is completely justified here and adds to the adventure. 

My only criticism is the layout. After the title page, the "general mechanics" section makes sense as the starting place to read the rest of the adventure, but it's not in a place that a reader would naturally start at. I would definitely recommend moving that to the other side of the page, as that is where I would expect the orienting material to be. This would also allow you to put the Ruin and the Ship side by side on the same page, which would be much more user friendly imo. (Edit: ignore that suggestion,  just realized the maps overlap when the page is folded over. That is so cool!)

I will second the suggestion of contouring the text to the background images, when I first opened the adventure that was my immediate thought. You might even be able to get away with breaking through the trifold fold lines to do so, you'd have to experiment.

I really like this! The procedures are fun and the oracle table looks like it would be fun to use. 

I think some minor tweaks could make it more user friendly: 

I had to read the Ruin Engine procedure twice before I understood it. I think putting a little label explaining that L0 rolled a 5, then a 3, then a 2, then a 6 would make the procedure much clearer. 

The d100 to determine stairs is confusing to me, I think an example of how exactly the roll relates to the map would help. 

I'm also not sure what "set the probability that the objective will be found by the desired difficulty of the scenario" means. What does it mean that an objective has a 30% chance of being found and how does this interact with or relate to the PCs actions?

I have read Roadside Picnic, but don't remember what "mosquito mange" is, I have not read the other referenced works. I think these references may frustrate more Wardens than they inspire.

I really like the concept as a whole, and your room descriptions are great. I actually think the map does a disservice to the adventure, because the mental image evoked by your descriptions often clashed with the map. I'm not sure the map is necessary, and removing it would give you room to put the engravings directly in the room descriptions where they are found. 

Design-wise I think there are too many colors, especially for the text. I had to zoom in more than usual to read it. 

I am confused by the objective to restore communications with MFBTC, what is MFBTC? I can't find any other use of the acronym and can't find anything that it is obviously standing for.

I think it would also help the Warden if there was a little more guidance on what happens if the crew doesn't disturb the black veins and disrupt the function. If I understand correctly, the Null Protocol won't be activated, does that mean the crew can simply walk out relatively safely? Seems too easy...

I understand that there are a lot of entries to read, but given your comment history you seem to be reviewing entries rapid fire, most of them in less than 5 minutes. Some of the things you were unclear about in our pamphlet such as PC background information is pretty clearly stated in the timeline of events (in bold even).  I hope for future reviews you give other pamphlets a closer read and do not skip pretty obvious stuff.

This is one of my favorites so far. Seems like a really fun downtime setting. I am probably in the minority on this issue, but I'm not a fan of drawn maps in trifolds unless they are specifically adding something. I would rather have that space used to flesh out the locations a bit with more gameplay and have the connections be shown with lines between the textboxes, Ypsilon 14 style.  

The vibe is excellent and it is full of cool ideas. I think it may be a little too overstuffed, and would better serve a Warden if it were pruned a little so that the more important parts can be emphasized more. The random encounter table is taking quite a bit of space for essentially being different combinations of 3 NPC types. The alert system doesn't appear to have a clear mechanical effect on the rest of the adventure.

I gave you very high marks for art, writing, game design, theme, and favorability, but I think layout and utility could be improved.

Honestly I would love to see you flesh this out into an adventure that is longer than a trifold. I think there is enough here that you could develop it into a really cool multi-page adventure.

I love this, it does a great job of invoking the John Henry story, and the mechanic with the cards is really cool. I definitely want to see the finished product.

Thank you for your comments! We're glad you liked it! 

Thank you for your comments!

We started out with the idea of a module based on the story of Layla and Majnun, and that led us to adding stuff from other Jinni mythology.  The brass is mainly a reference to the 1001 Nights story of the City of Brass (considered to be one of the oldest known sci fi stories) as well as to the idea of a brass Jinni lamp.

As for decoupling the ship, the idea is that if Qays does not want the PCs escaping with the Bottle, so if Solomon is neutralized then Qays won't let them escape. In testing we determined that if the PCs defeat Solomon, the adventure needed something to prevent an easy getaway. 

The PCs won't be able to go down the elevator unless the power has been reactivated, unless they are climbing down manually...