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A jam entry

Draw Everything You See That's Mine And YoursView game page »

rated [m] for situations and obscenities
Submitted by kaleidofish (@kaleidofish) with 1 day, 2 hours before the deadline

Results

CriteriaRankScore*Raw score
Storytelling#15.0005.000
Immersion#14.2504.250
Overall#33.8133.813
Style#93.2503.250
Experimentation#112.7502.750

Ranked from 4 ratings. Score is adjusted from raw score by the median number of ratings per game in the jam.

Comments

Really amazed at the detail and length of the story, but it didn't feel drawn out. I liked the way you structured the Twine with details, too. Great job!

The characters were really, really compelling. My favourite scene was where Nolan attempts to explain why a straight guy might jack off another guy for "power". It's funny, and humanly irrational. Using the hyperlinks to expand detail instead of story choice was also an interesting experimental use of Twine. Good job!

Great, immersive storytelling. The characters in particular are beautifully observed and sketched - I found myself really caring about what happened to them. The writing style is sparse and lovely with flashes of real poetry. The interactivity and little tricks of presentation (like the gender symbols) worked nicely too - they really added to the effect.

Loved it! Thanks for the read.

Jupiter_Hadley · 2 years ago

Nice twine! I included it in part 2 of my Nar8 Compilation video series, if you’d like to take a look :) http://youtu.be/0jnBKLM-wt4

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