I think everyone else said things the best way possible, so I'll just echo what they said to reinforce points that stood out to me:

• Good art
• Characters' personalities are clear
• Needs music & sounds
• The magical girl (boy?) segment and battle system seems kinda shoehorned in there; needs to be either fleshed out or remade to fit the story better
• It took me a while to understand the ending, and even then it's not clear to me why Haruki is doing what he's doing

This is an interesting short visual novel!

I really like the artwork! The character art in particular was cute and expressive. Especially the fullscreens, such as the hug and when he brought over the rabbit.

The gameplay is mostly a standard visual novel. I do appreciate that there is a battle of sorts, though it's pretty simple in it's current form. I'd like to see that spiced up a bit as you continue development!

The story was interesting, especially the twist at the end. The dialogue was fun and engaging. I will admit though, that I did have a bit of trouble following exactly what was happening big-picture wise. The scenes individually worked well, but it felt like it jumped quickly at moments.

I would like some audio, music, etc. There are a lot of great tracks online for free, usually (but not always!) with a simple credit requirement for usage.

Hoping that you are continuing development on this, as it has a lot of promise! As it currently stands, it's already pretty good... I'd love to see it go to the next level!

Short, light-hearted story with a plot twist at the end is how I see Haruki's Magical Adventure. The soft pastel colored world and characters feels warm and goes hand in hand with the well written dialogs. On the other hand, there isn't much to say about the gameplay due to its Ren'py origin while the story has potential to grow if it carries on in its own fashion.

Magical Girl Concept: The game did not make full use of the Magical Girl concept as it is only depicted in a very short segment in the game. The character Haru has a Magical Girl sprite which is acceptable although there is no mentioned anywhere in the story that magic was used.

Mechanics: The game uses the stock Ren'py visual novel mechanics and no additional mechanics were noted.

Visual: The character arts and CGs were done really well, with the color choices being in the soft pastel region suitable for a really warm and loving story. Although it is said that the art assets were made during the game jam period, one thing I wanted to point out is that the location backgrounds may have come from a stock set from somewhere so I hope the developer could clarify the assets used since the game does not have a credits list of where the assets could have derived from.

UI: Nothing to say about the game UI since it uses stock layout and design from Ren'py.

Audio: There is no trace of audio played throughout the game. The game could at least have one BG music even if its from a stock set.

Theme: The magical girl theme isn't heavily emphasized or utilized in the story. It feels like the story could have its own bearing without the Magical Girl element. (Spoiler Alert! Start) As for the side theme picked which is uncertainty, the game did not truly make full use of the theme since the idea of uncertainty is pretty much diminished with only one possible ending in the game. I have tried each possible options but the results made certain there is only one path in the game (Spoiler Alert! End). Also, the surprise/uncertainty aspect of it was spoiled from the description in the itch.io page, before I even started the game, see notes below.

Challenge / Engagement: The game did not pose any gameplay so there is nothing to be challenged. I would say the story is well written which is engaging as it appeals to my inner warmness, wanting to see more of the plot movement between the two characters and how their lives would progress as they interact with each other while their environment changes over time.

Originality / Creativity: The character art and design is really unique in its own way which suits the direction of where the story is going. In terms of creativity, the dialogs written for each character feels real and have their own touch of personality to it. There is a good amount of harmony between the two during their conversation.

Story: The game truly emphasizes on the story as the main aspect of the gameplay itself. The dialogs has been though out pretty well with some nice big words, no typos or grammatical errors, and feels natural. I find the story a little short and cuts into the end very suddenly. Hence, there is a lot of possible content that could fill the voids in between the present story. What I would like to see, if the story does get develop, is the relationship development between Haru and Chihaya, while speculating on the final aspect of their fates. I think the story has two ways to go about it, either emphasize on the Magical Girl aspect in the story, e.g. Haruki chants magical spells or perform acts of casting a magic spell, or on the other hand disregard the Magical Girl idea and let the story run in its own pastel colored world, e.g. Haru and Chihaya spends time together at different places, do activities together, etc. Either way, it will still be a magical experience but it up to how the developer would take the story further. (Added) A third option exist where elements of the magical girl theme is retained but introduce additional themes, say they are a pair of prince and knight in shining armor, Romeo and Juliet, etc.

Overall: The game has some substantial story and art that makes it unique and interesting in its own way. The magical girl element may feel a little out of place right now since it feels like it was added for the sake of the game jam theme. As mentioned in the story section and since the game itself has a charm of its own, the game does have a lot of potential in the story side of things and when develop in the right direction could very well appeal to mass audiences.

Note: When writing the description for potential warning of certain aspect of the game in the itch.io description. Please be mindful of spoilers because that literally broke my surprise of any uncertain elements in the game. I would suggest writing the warning as: "Please be advised that the game contains elements that may be disturbing or sensitive to certain audiences" which doesn't spoil the surprised in an obvious way.

I'm kind of confused whether Haruki is meant to be trans or trans-coded or not. It doesn't really feel that way from the game, but the key art is almost literally the colours of the trans flag.

It's really unclear initially which character is which, because both characters are shown on screen at the same time and the text doesn't make it clear who is who. I didn't figure out which one was Haru and which one was Chi-Chi until the hug scene.

I didn't fully understand what was going on the first time, but the second time I played it all clicked. For me the twist and the big reveal almost, but didn't quite work. I can't put my finger on why that is. Maybe it's because the connection between the magical girl battle and the later event wasn't clear, maybe it's because there doesn't really seem to be a motive past "yandere gonna yandere". This is probably something that can be addressed pretty well with a little tweaking.

I thought the art wouldn't really be my thing, but it's surprisingly appealing. I do wish there was sound and music. You mentioned that this isn't complete, though, so I'm assuming those are on the to-do list.

The battle system is, uh, sorry, it's just not very good. I realize doing that in RenPy is hard and it's not really the focus of the game, but it's hard to give a pass to when I've seen much better ones in the past. A Magical Girl's Duty (sadly never finished) from the first MGGJ was particularly good. Even if you choose to keep it simple, I'd like to see the presentation improved.

I think it's a good start. The storyline can work, the art style is good. A few things are missing and a few things could be tweaked. But I'm looking forward to playing the finished game.