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Since you introduce slavery how about getting sub plot going there, visit slave market maybe play some moral choice there, buy one, uplift them, buy one be cruel to them, or not interested at all, we have something like underground fighting ring and somewhat auction of relic and artifacts, it seems like missing opportunity for not introducing slave auction or market, I mean we only get one chance to do this during Sanziyan hunt, if we choose to teach those cultivator a lesson we can get a slave. 

It seems like missed opportunity, the concept is there but not further explored, what's the scale of this slavery, how one can be come slave, how to buy freedom if such concept exists, so far MC only view the world from elite point of view, the lowest of MC's friend probably Li Hua since he is from merchant family, so far MC only meet couple characters that can be categorized as downtrodden. 

not sure about song mao since he is not telling his past in detail just yet, Lu Yan despite being treated harshly by her family still among the elite group. 

I suppose you gonna write unique reaction to MC's race?  Since so far MC is probably only use their human persona and since nobody could see through their veil(if reader choosing non human race)

If the previous version is good, this one is awesome, you really expand it, giving details to the scene now MC's background is more clearer, they're Prince/Princess of Heavenly Empire, previously I only get the impression that MC in previous version is heir to the great cultivator house in immortal realm, now I am getting chills on how influential their original family is, the forest scene also expanded,  I like the addition of mundane things like handfishing  I mean we're playing child here even if they're crazy powerful child there should be time for play and fun things. Not just cultivating and being serious all the time. 

 I like that you also expand more on Ji Jian now she doesn't feel like in previous version forgettable extra character, now I have reason to pick Ji Ji as my first word instead of Ru Ru beside trying to tease Ruolan, I think having a chance to develop bonds with foster family is great addition to this story. 

 I think the pacing still good, you manage to balance the expansion from being too lore dumpy but still pretty descriptive. 

Alright will be checking it out after my shift is done...... May the fountain of creativity never dry....

I can say this expand beautifully, there is still something to be improved like mistake of pronouns and some typo but dang so far I'm pumped to see how others go after time skip in chamber.

There is some mispronounce like My Vessel is a she but Steele often call it he and him and dude.

So author doesn't afraid to off a character that's rather uncommon, if this is just a prologue then consider my interest piqued. 

Hi author just asking question on how far the update is? Just for confirmation that I've reached the end of current version.

Hey I want to join Patreon or Monthly subs but my country is not really friendly with USD any other way to pay for this?

One of my favorite story.... Hopeful for more

Wow the story is much cleaner now,  beautiful format, no typo and easier on the eyes, well done author.... I am impressed. 

Cool update , the quality also Improved I didn't see much typo , good to know MC have  power to compell weaker creature it's easier to hide MC's power with that and solve problem peacefully. 

Two thumbs up.... 

Awesome, Looking forward for the update....

Here I make the list of the typo hope this help. 

This child better not be like "hers" father the beginning scene where MC's Grandfather recite poet. 

"Hers" name is Li Yi Ping (my MC name) Ruolan introduced MC to her mother. 

The thoughts lasted for a long time, until she finally came to the decision of not hiding anything from "him".(My MC is Female)

the only thing missing was the presence of "RUolan". Scene after tiger hunt. 

{b}KNOCK KNOCK{/b} scene after moving to Palace, maybe you wanted to make this Bold letter perhaps?. 

Raise your head "yound" lady,  scene in Ruolan Party. If you pick accept her apology. 

"That kid Li Yi Ping, she will get herself into some big trouble someday if she's not careful with "hers" tongue." Lu Zhou said. 

who's currently riding your horse with your daughter, scene if MC decide to stay in town to help. 

Not sure if she can trust the little on horse. This maybe missing something maybe author wanted to insert mistress here or girl or child? 

from "their" you will no longer have to worry about the world if you are strong. Maybe the author meant there? 

We need to use yin energy to slow it, then use "(XXX) to" slowly drain all the blood from the infected part and hope it hasn't touched any vitals yet. The original sentence lack something I think. 

Or if you rich enough then just buy an "elixier" and cure it instantly. Just pointing it out it if that's what really the name of the cure instead of elixir. 

you can see "the" through everything. The for what? Maybe them? Theirs? Scene when MC walks to arena to spar. 

accepts "hers" defeat or is unable to fight. Commentary before the fight with elder. 

To win disciple Li Yi Ping will have to make elder Mo Bin acknowledge "his" strength. My MC is female. 

There are many eyes in the "audiance" who now see you as a threat. Bit typo there. 

Yes, I'm the choice after sleeping the day after, maybe author meant I am.

 Go with RUolan, the option for visiting illegal underground fight club. 

I know since she's your sister you think highly of "him", chat with Li Hua in the underground arena. 

I don't "hers" martial skills because she's my sister, probably need to fix this reply from Ruolan need to add doubt and fix the hers. 

you see "sever" shops on your way to the auction hall. Something missing maybe several? 

but it appears since your "arriver" in the sect was unusual they forget to check on you. 

Not only wang family have strong cultivators but they are also known for their "strategiest". Maybe Plot? Scheme? Strategy seems too upright of a word for this nefarious dude. 

"He" must be here to court death. Murmurs from the crowd I presume? Before MC get to arena. 

 brat defeat a never "loosing" champion. May I suggest the undefeatable? Than never losing? 

A not even half his age, cutting down all the people he felt safe with here just now, the event in the island, something is missing probably a child?

Noticed that the option to reply to Ruolan is rarely using honorific like sister, in society where status and position is kinda big deal maybe reader should have option for polite reply, instead of "what you want", maybe there is option for casual polite reply like " What happen, Sister? " Or " What's going on sis? ", maybe author could insert playful reply like " Now sis what do you want from the old me " Grinning. 

I like this small act of kindness Author put on the story, like the old blind man, the old woman that fell into river, the old man and his daughter, pushing the unwanted child to find her courage and confident to confront the world, I feel this is person that really need kindness the most and they rarely get it, hopefully there will be more interaction like this, changing world one step at the time one small kindness prevent the world turn cold.

I am sorry I don't know how to edit it may be make it like smaller. 

awesome, I will replay the game shortly. 

This time I will try to keep notes where the typo is if I find something wrong..... 

I've played the update, the story still have many typo and often mispronounced MC's gender, like I take Female MC and often she's referred as He. 

The fighting the underground arena no matter what you choose it seems the game always think you murder the guy, (I choose to offer him surrender, but he doesn't want to so I need to force him to surrender). 

While he seems like a bad person from how the story introducing him, he doesn't do anything bad with my MC, it's humiliating enough losses though....  Hope he learn his lesson. 

Back again after update, This story blooming rather beautifully, not sure about the Chaos skill but I am starting to like Umbra skill, I almost defeated that pesky sister of MC, overall satisfied on how Umbra skill right now, I guess with little bit of training MC would turn out great. 

Malefic skill is great as well but very mana heavy, I am previously defeating MC sister with this skill tree, just roll the dice at stun and poison her constantly, although defeating her will need some save exploitation, I believe Umbra is capable defeating her as well if keep reloading the save. 

 Would try chaos skill next. 

Well people do get the idea, there is no need to be unnecessary rude in the end it's a hobby/passion project. 

I find people tend to react more positively to carrot especially in writing community. 

Wait how far the story goes? There is no option after flashback "calm would be shattered"? 

I see, excited to read what you will add.

Keep in mind to balance writing and real life, most author can't balance this causing burnt out which is sad because they wrote good stories :(

Anyway good luck😁

There is no need for total rewrite just need editing adding some more flair, description and polishing some page, like there is noticable typo so far, this whole early chapter could surpass 100k word if you let it bloom. 

This is interesting story, I get a good laugh out of it like act as some sort of bumbling idiot even being OP as hell, I like how you wrote the table has been turned on them.

But.....  I think this could use some more description you know like cooking tiger not just written as  cooking and eating maybe you could describe the process itself like skinning the tiger, then cut the best part ( maybe ribs, shanks, whatever) leave the dirty organs or describe something like Tiger Liver have especially good quality, like how it was cooked? Is it Stirred? Roast? Grilled or maybe steamed? There is a way to make cooking something as part of lore dumping like what seasoning they use? Is there any fancy herbs? Maybe unique sauce? 

There is also mention of forest should take some time to describe how the forest looks like, any bioluminescent plants? What kind of tree there is? Crooked trees or maybe vines sprawl?

 Also like the cultivation school, how's the school looks like? White pagoda, large courtyard, massive gate, with thousands of staircase in the mountains or like floating island? 

there is also part like person, should describe what they look like, like skin color, face features of there is any, how tall they are, how broad, how their body looks like? Lanky, Stout, athletic, fit, etc, like our sister probably could be described how she grow up to be? How tall? What's the difference now and back then?  Roulan is beautiful ofc but what kind of beauty? Innocent? Natural? Sharp? Or maybe cute beauty?  Did she blushed, stutter or maybe if you're writing for adults could also describe her bust? Is it large or average or small?  Describing more of the character in detail will make reader care about such character, like Roulan mother I understand she's kind person a healer but what else, maybe she bake snack for MC? Small little things like that will invoke emotion from the reader and make reader more and more sympathetic towards her, while some would see this as railroading it is in a good way railroading. 

Take more time to describe, ofc it could be filled with reader imagination, telling stories is like creation.... Show us reader how vibrant and wonderful this world you're building, I understand the fast pace probably because MC still a child, it maybe limiting but still in my opinion a bit more description/narration would make the story bloom. 

I feel chaos skill tree is not that powerful in comparison to others, like chance to heal or damage enemies that's really chaotic but th effect kinda underwhelming.

The umbra skill tree probably the least wonky but the evasion is only one turn need at least 2-3 turn.

This is awesome story, so I take it the way to get stronger is to get corruption?  What changes it will be?

My MC is seeking peace would love to see Spectre of the past come rearing back at some point forcing my MC to finally face the challenge.