itch.io

Hey there,

I'm not the host for this jam, but honestly don't see why you shoudn't be able. However the jam has a raiting system with the following criteria

Visual Impact - is the image impactful and interesting?

Creativity -  Is the design creative and/or unique?

Technical Execution - Lighting, perspective, color, etc.

Correlation to Theme - Did the artist write to the theme, or go off the rails? This is largely to ensure original work.

Most likel having only sketches might not give you the best scores in some of the categories. But still worth a shot.

Hey there,

to clarify this a bit. Of course you are more than welcome to share your work after the jam. Normally within itch jams your work should be don exclusively for the corresponding jam with only work done in the timeframe of the jam. For this jam you’re open to use content from other jams you might work on that are running parallel to this time frame (maybe started a bis earlyer that this jam but is finishing withing the timeframe of this jam or after this jam has ended). So for example you joined another music jam in the same time frame you are open to also use the music or artwork for this jam too. Hope that clarifies it a bit

Think it is a bit rought around the edges listenability whise, but recalling the sircumstances this is more than understandable that it does not sound as good as other stuf you made so fare. Somewhat reminded me of the OST of 1917 by Thomas Newman (like for example The Night Window). It kind of creates a similar wavy vibe that feels very chilly but also unsettling. 

Feel somewhat reminded of Diabolo swing orchestra. Love the vibe!

Tak for de venlige ord. Sadly my danish wouldn’t alow for answering fully. But seriously thank you for your kind words. The whole lyrics are actually written in Icelandic to sound the most old germanic. Originally only knowing bokmål (norwegina) it was kind of interesting comparing the similarities between both languages. So it is kind of interestring how someone speaking an also similar language would interprete the words and lyrics.

Tusind tak og bedste hilsner fra naboen (Tyskland)

Damn that is short. Personally I really dig the idea and there are glimpses of something that reminds me of something that could come out of a Bloodborne OST where that melody could go really well. However, compositionally the arrangement feels way to sparse for really shine on that. Also the melody does only repeat itself 2 times it neither creates any real impact nor create any other feeling or context outside of it establishing moment.

Arrangement wise bass and violins are creating a nice floaty bed to let the melody dance around like on a dark waltz. And with not having the Viola implemented there is enough room to expand on. While I really like the idea and approach this feels way to short and more like a first draft then an actual composition, that I would really like to hear since there are sparks of a cool idea.  

Melody clarity: 3/5

Melody impact: 3/5

Composition: 2/5

Listenability: 3/5

Correlation of Theme: 3/5

To recap on the rating. This is mostly due to being too short and not creating a feeling of having an actual song to rate upon and not having other elements outside some strings and an Anvil sound in the beginning. Otherwise, it feels like it has any potential to actually score way higher.

Composition: 4/5            Listenability: 4/5               Correlation of theme: 4/5

The sound texture work really well with something pseudo retro-ish like games that are inspired by but not necessarily retro like Mohrta or Lunacid. Structurally this also works very well with your described scene and creates a nice narrative.

Melody clarity: 2/5         Melody impact: 3/5

However, melodically there it happening a lot to really consider something as the main melodic element. Like for example the trumpet has a nice impact, but plays play to long different phrases to feel like it creates a memorable melodic line. Oddly the little phrase with F and C feels like it could create an interesting melodic element since it is also implemented at different parts and stick out well enough. Something like the Mandalorian comes to mind where the Bass Recorder creates a very memorable melodic element without being necessarily complex.

Composition: 4/5           Listenability: 4/5

As a general note I really want to say that the texture, arrangement and composition is nicely done. Specially the narrower choice of instruments lends itself nicely for an Octett or Nonett and reminds me at parts to some works of Kai Rosenkranz (who did the music for the Gothic games), specially with your work on the woodwinds. However, it feels at times like it could either use some more additional textures or arrangement to fill out the instrumentation, since it at times feel a bit patchy and leaves very empty spaces withing the composition to consider it exceptional.

Melody Clarity: 3/5        Melody impact: 4/5

I think there are multiple contenders on who could play the main melody. For me it feels like it would be more the main motive played on the bassoon. While it impact felt very good and had a nice moment of creating a feeling of wonder. It kind of feels like it needs to be woven in a bit more like having different sections repeating parts of it so it can be established more as the main motive/melody to feel less subdued within the whole song. Same could be said by the melody at 1:20 and repeating at 2:21. I think they need more support with doubling sections to really jump out and catch the listener, since the feel a bit passing by and are not that noticeable as the main melodic element of the song (like having oboe and viola play it in the first run and oboe, clarinet and bassoon).

Correlation of theme: 3/5

This is a bit hard for me, since I’m a bit torn on that matter. Personally, the picture and creation of a weapon would feel way more raw and more energetic. With the gentler orchestral band approach, it feels more like describing the work of an artisan working meticulously. But then it would feel like there are missing some elements to fully convey that feeling to me since it creates more of a feeling of mysticism that could stand for a mystical weapon that can be found rather than being created at the moment of this music. (keep in mind this is a very personal and subjective note)

Hey Alex. Glad you liked it. Yeah the Tagleharpa is midi. Same with the frame drums and other bigger percussions. Although for the Tagleharpa it is already planned to get a real one this year and I'm in contact with a luthier from Poland to build one^^.

There are some more details like Lyrics and used VSTs and instruments on the main project page. But we'r also more than happy to share some insights of how the song was made ;-)

Yoo! Thank you so much for your kind words again Semaj. The lyrics (with translation) and some more description can be found on the project page. We justs didn't post it on the submission page since it is quite a wall of text.

The "breathing" is actually a different sound made with a real Horn and is part of some FX work. The whole song has a lot of real recordings to create interesting sounds. Think there where only 7 tracks that are VSTs.

A platform where you can stream the song outside itch.io. Like YouTube, BandCamp, Spotify or SoundCloud

Yeah that 8Dio sax is a little bastard and needed quite some kicking to fit where it should sit. After giving it some relistening with other headphones that make problems in the bass region much more apparent and also with some other input from this jam I already started giving it a retouch. Hopefully this will get much better sounding in a bit of time.

LAST RATING BABY!!! And also most likely the best for last with you two teaming up again promising very much.

The Atmosphere you two have created is massive getting enhanced by the very clean and cinematic sound design. The mix sounds CRISP and looking at the DAWs screenshot of you both I would have gone lost with the shear number of tracks. Having bought it immediately after coming up in my BandCamp feed should say everything. So I leave it at brilliant work for you both. Keep up the good work!

It has a very nice early 2000 vibe with the heavy use of samples being pitched and creating the rhythmic foundation with those nice metallic sounds. Also, the pacing is nicely done and right on time. However, the second movement sounded a bit repetitive and like it needed some high-end sparkling elements that would give it some more texture and loosen it up a bit (happened to my submission as well). But overall, it was quite the pleasant experience.

This goes hard and I can’t even imagine how you managed the sound design. Specially with all those little sounds everywhere. But your screenshot already gave a glimpse into the automation hell you’ve encountered and blasted you way thru.

However, while the sounds and sound design sounded very top notch there, the balance sounded a bit off at times. Specially with some of the percussive elements and the guitar. My biggest recommendation is to listen thru your songs with turned down volume, so you might be able to talk over it with no problems and listen to the loudness of your elements. Most of the time it’s getting harder and harder to judge differences in volume when listening to it loud. This is due to how our attention works with loudness or brightness being perceived algorithmically. So, when already listening to a loud sound another sound needs to be MUCH louder for you to perceive it louder. While with listening to it with less volume the difference doesn’t need to be as loud to perceive. So for mixing I’d recommend giving it some runs in lower loudness. Also, it gives you the opportunity to judge which elements are the most important, since those elements are the one you should still hear while the song is whisper quiet.

In addition, this is just a production recommendation worth trying out, you could try compressing your signals by type. This means compressing the drums separately from your melodic and harmonic elements. Meaning you create two compression busses one for percussions and one for over compressing the rest (mixing the dry/wet to taste). Then in your master you keep the glue compressor as tame as possible with only compressing 2-3db MAX. This is a method Andrew Scheps used to use in his productions.

This is going to be a longer critique so I give the TLDR here first:

It is a very ambient and nice, when a bit shot, idea that has many elements that worked very well and were a nice creative approach. But some that might not work in its favour.  

While there will be quite a bit talk that can sound negative. I’d like to emphasise that this is nothing against you or the song in general. Please see them more as subjective guiding notes that I think could improve the listening experience. It should be noted that the overall listening experience is in no way bad or negative. While the points might sound much there are more specific details rather than major problems.

• What has worked well: The string like textures with the modulating reverb tails are a nice touch and set up the mood nicely. Also the sound FX of when you start the chanting has a nice organic sound that worked well in the situation. Also the general Elements sounded clean.
• What didn’t work for me: The stereo width falls apart pretty drastically since the center is underrepresented in the beginning and the vocals very much to the sides making it almost L-C-R sounding rather than a wide stereo. The tremolo effect was quite distracting and took some attention from the other voices. Having the wet/dry mix more on the dryer side would have worked more in its favour. Also, The vocals are compressed quite heavy with taking a breath getting quite loud. Two points would be to first clean up the recordings by either cutting out breathing or by fading into the recording to keep them at a minimal. With compression it is better to use multiple compressors working in series rather than using one that works to hard and compressing the whole signal. Also, a wet/dry signal (parallel use) might not work that well since it feels you need to compress it more making it sound too strong. So I’d strongly advice to use a 100% wet usage for vocals.
• Singing: This is more of some advice rather than a down right critique, since I’ve done that in a semi professional way in my past. While the chanting sounded nice it feels like its tanking the back burner rather than creating the dramaticism it should. This is mostly due to the lack of projection in the voice. My former teacher described it best by comparing the feeling of the sound of your voice starting inside your mouth rather than in front of it. A nice training is to take your finger and imagine to sing where your finger is. Start by right at your chin and start pointing more in front of you. Keep in mind your body and hip should stay grounded and relaxed. Also your belly mussels should be lightly tensed like pushing your breast out a bit but not to tensed up like showing of a six pack. And your air should feel like it is right between your belly and breast. So when breathing out you can take long and controlled breaths. This is more about noticing how your body feels while trying to sing more out without starting to necessarily getting louder. A second point would be the time alignment of different recordings. Getting a bombastic sound means most often getting the timing tight. So either the editing needs to be top or the recording needs to be well timed. Best practice for getting it by recording would be to NOT listening to your processed sound but to reference a click or the song. You should either feel confident to sing without listening yourself thru the headphones or by using a direct out from your sound card (most of them nowadays have a function so you hear your mic input). Reason is that every effect or plugin in the chain will add additional latency to general latency of your soundcard that needs to digitize, get in your daw and then be converted back to analogue to be heard. This goes in a same boat as time alignment but when recording multiple vocals singing the same lyrics it might be helpful to sing half of the takes or singers without the main consonants (t, s, k, d) since those will be most noticeable when the alignment isn’t 100% there and at times feel overpowering. In general I think keeping the mix simple would have worked out for you since less is more on those regards and with what I’ve seen in the devlog it felt more like you lost yourself in different details rather than having a simple mixed basis to work from that. While most mixing tricks sound fancy and what not most are not really necessary in my experience or are edge cases for certain situations. So my best advice is to keep it as simple as possible (looking at analogue workflow is a nice guide line in that regard)

Still, let me emphasise again that I liked your work and that you did well, since my critique might come over a bit harsh (which isn't my intention).

The set ambiance feels quite different from what I’ve expected with the given picture. It has something longing and, in a way, romantical. The elements with orchestral sound effects, soundscape and instrumentation create a nice texture. I think the strings are meant to be a chopped of from each other to sound like they are reversed echoing in the background? Either way it kind of created that sound to me, that felt quite creative. Only gripe I gathered is the reverb. It feels a bit to overpowering at times mushing around different sounds. Specially with the strings and lower orchestral FX. My suggestion would be to filter your reverb more so that it sits mostly in the mid range. So that oberly bassy sounds and harsh highs are less noticeable. A Nice trick would be to also choose 2 different reverbs to have one for your longer reverb tails and one for your more roomier sounds.  

I feel the strong urge to also compliment you on your artwork and give it some praise. While I first said it contrasted with what the music that actually played but in a way it still fitted nicely. Also the composition, rule of thirds, fame in frame, is nicely dine. With a very detailed grayscale and those red accents. Also, the perspective depth and leading lines are nicely done. The lesser contrast in the grayscale makes the red accents pop very well. I’m quite impressed and somewhat envious.

The sound design is very nicely done and contrasts very well with the soft lush strings in the background. The overall sound was very balanced with a very complete arrangement and nice progression. Only small gripe are the percussions for me. This is very subjective but the feel either a bit to overly destroyed so the transient doesn’t that well or sounded a bit to dry for my taste. My suggestion here would be either to use an envelope for the gain setting so the transients are clearer while still sounding dirty es hell. For more wetness I’d either go with a spring reverb sound that has some sploshy stringy effecting sound or go even with a short almost self-modulating delay that creates a short resonant feedback depending on the percussion’s hit (relistening to it this might be the way you’ve actually achieved the sound not with distortion in the first place).

But the overall listening experience was very enjoyable and worth some relistening.

This is REALLY nice! Considering the time you only had this is God right impressive!

The first song had a really nice floaty feeling to it. The combination with your synth drone and string worked quite well and were nicely complimented by your use of the metallic percussions.

Second song created a nice tension while still feeling cohesive with the first song. At starting it reminded me a bit of The Rite of Spring second movement. I think getting your percussions roaring more by complimenting or accenting the strings  would be a very nice addition. But still it sounded nice.

The third song is a nice touch to fade us out. It also had a nice ambience that tied very well to the first song and gave it somewhat of a meditative touch. Also the Modulation in the reverb tail was a nice detail.

All in all I’m very impressed.

Solid orchestration with nice change of pacing and exploring your melodical idea in different arrangements and contexts. It still felt very cohesive and had a very nice story telling.

Really dig the atmosphere and soundscape you’ve created. Fells like it has some industrial dark wave inspirations but with WAY gentler sound design. Sadly, it feels a bit short and I would really like to hear that idea more explored. But, like you’ve written in your submission, it is kind of understandable with having only a short time frame.

Hey Squirrel, thank you so much for your kind words. And yeah you are right. Those icy shard things are quite noticeable on that part. But they are actually all around the song for adding some high end texture, since everything else is quite dark sounding, I might just need to take them off a notch so they are more subtle like everywhere else.

Hey Simishcj, thank you for your critique. The original Idea was to switch it out on the finale but decided against it for consistency reasons. But you’re more than bang on with doubling the sax with some other melodic instrument. Sadly that part only got finished on the day before submission 💀. Hopefully I will be able to implement it after this jam for the final release on the other platforms. Keep int on!

Short info. Your submission page is empty. There is no external link for listening and the song isn't for download. Also the project page seems to be bugged and can't be opener. Might be a problem with some settings for the submitted project.

Aaaaah classic cinema sound before everything needed to be bombastic big and bwaaah. Oddly besides the Bernard Hermann inspiration, at time it feels like some Danny Elfman can be also heard too. Specially with some of the bass lines on the half way mark. While taking a full orchestral approach this still feels very much unique and I am quite a fan of your approach. Originally, I thought you’ve made it in a notation software since the articulations are chosen very cleanly and fittingly. But seeing Cubase as your screenshot there might be some ways to even improve on what you have on the mixing side. Mind you what you have is already quite good.

TLDR: This is a nerdy monolog.

The biggest factor that feels like it could be explored more and benefit the song even more would be microphoning of the different sections and how you pull certain sound characteristics from the sections. For example, wanting a more searing string sound by pulling up the close mics. While the older recordings had a very roomy sound it was due to being recorded with most of the time only one omni directional mic or with a decca tree (since 1950s) working in L-C-R. Even with some recordings being made in purpose build stages with specific bright room sounds (looking at the Synchron stage in Vienna). So the sound is something different to modern scoring sounds and most sample libraries. So the best way to harness the sound of your libraries is to take every section as their own recording session with their own microphone mix suited to your liking. Next step would be processing of the different section like EQ, reverb and compression or even different processing for short and long articulations. I don’t want do overblow the critique, so I leave it at that. But if you are interested in discussing this more I’m more than open for it.

The first piano motive has a very strong resemblance to Undertales Ruins theme. But not in any bad way. It sets up the mysterious mood very well and creates a nice entrance to the rest of the song. Witch progressing the song it also gets a nice drive that has very nice head bopping energy and is kinda catchy. However it feels like the background noises at times overpower the song a bit too much and create a to big distraction from the otherwise smooth listening experience. The noise themed breaks are a nice touch and the sound design is nicely done but feel like the should also have had an additional narrative purpose. While there are elements added with each break it feels at times very subtle. I thinking would be to have the general song representing the hero and the noises and distorted sounds represent a looming danger the hero has to face. So with every break the danger gets greater and more noisy or distorted elements gets incorporated. Despite the aforementioned balance problem the overall listening experience is quite pleasant.

Kind of hard to put it in actual words despite siting there in awe. It really has a mesmerizing hauntingly beautiful nature. The ambiance and soundscape you’re creating in the first two minutes are very believable and create a nice entrance to the main piece. Also the sparse arrangement works very well with the set up atmosphere without feeling hollow or like it is missing something. The mix is done competently well and amplifies the compositional tone well enough. Surely there might be point of improvement, but these points would be minor things since there aren’t any elements that hinder the listening experience in any way.

While this point is not part of my critique and rating. I’d recommend looking into automating panning to create more movement in the ambiance. You’ve nailed each scene by itself perfectly but (this is hardcore nitpicking and nerding out) it feels like moving from picture to picture and not also wandering inside it. So my tip would be to consider how the sound might change while walking thru the scenes. Are things moving from left to right or center? Or are things fading in and out? I think nailing this would even more mesmerize the listener in even more emersion and elevate this strong submission even more.

The idea itself is quirky with a certain charm that kind of reminds me of more experimental interludes in 70s prog music like maybe on a Gentle Giant album. While it also fits the narrative of the given jams theme well. However it feels like it needs further more exploration to really shape its intended form. At times it feels a bit disorganized and lacking the focus it might need to convey the more upbeat creative idea more. Also the balance of sounds makes it feel a bit disjointed in that regard, since the wosh sound at times overpower the piano playing or when the piano is heard it somewhat feels like just noodling away aimlessly.

Like said before there is something interesting and intriguing in there and without wanting to talk it down. But the things you should focus on for developing it more or explore this idea more is to focus on its structure. What story should et tell? Which intent does it have and how do you convey that? Are there different elements/actors that get represented by different melodies or instruments? Which element needs the focus at which time and are there elements that might distract from that? I think getting thru some of those questions or similar ones for yourself might help you find the aim to create a more conveying presentation of your quirky but charming ideas.

Thank you so much for your kind words. BTW it is just a Tenor Sax for the whole song with some octave (down and up) delays in the background to give it some broader texture. So maybe that’s what you've might picked up as something oboe like in the background.

The idea to incorporate the industrial sounds and “percussions” is a nice touch and works certainly well. Specially with the non-symmetrical feel of 5/4 it gives it some heft. Also, the choice of genre is quite refreshing and could work quite well for a racing game or something in that mountain factory. However while listening to it it felt more like it really wanted to go further and beyond with its tension but sadly never got the chance to really burst out and go full on, which would have been awesome for the style of song. There are also multiple parts that feel like they would lead to a climax but feel like they are stitched to the next part. Personally mix wise this feel quite clean but a bit other processed with EQ settings being quite narrow for each element and overly compressed. I knot that it is part of the genre but it would have been nice if the elements would have gotten some more room to breath and feel a bit livelier. None the less this is a cool unique entry.

The given ambiance is nice and ominous and fits the given theme very well while also having something calm and invites the listener to stay and linger. I really dig the chosen ambient sounds and how you’ve built your environment. This might be just my personal taste but it would have been nice to hear some extension in the frequency range with some elements having some more bass or having some other elements in the highs.

Having seen that you are a Berlin based compose it might be easier writing in German.  

Die Komposition an sich ist nett und trifft deine beschriebene Scenerie recht gut. Allerdings find ich sie leider etwas kurz um eine konkretere Bewertung abgeben zu können, gerade in Bezug auf die Komposition. Grundsätzlich ist der Klang stabil und die Elemente arbeiten harmonisch zusammen. Einzig die Balance der Synth-Klänge und Streicher ist etwas wackelig und könnte, meiner Meinung nach, etwas mehr ausgearbeitet werden. Beispielsweise sind Kick und Bass in einem sehr ähnlichen Frequenzspektrum und haben Schwierigkeiten sich sauber voneinander abzusetzen. Gepaart mit den heller klingenden Streichern entsteht so eine gewisse Lücke, die entweder ein paar weitere Elemente dazwischen (zum ausbauen des Frequenzspektrums) brauchen oder das beide Elemente näher gebracht werden (beispielsweise durch EQ und Verwendung anderer Artikulationen der Streicher in Flautando oder Sul-Tasto um einen wärmeren Klang zu bilden). Bei allem Mäkeln und Zetern will ich aber dennoch betonen, dass es durchaus solide klang und meine Punkte eher Anreiz für Verbesserungsmöglichkeiten sind. Die Wahl des Settings hatte mich allerdings schon ein wenig überrascht in Bezug auf das vorgegebene Thema des Jams.

Nichts desto trotz, liebe Grüße aus Potsdam 😉

Yo! There seem to be missing an external link for listening to your music. Also the downloadable files are not showing up. Most likely this is due to some settings in your project you need to change.
[EDIT] On the itch.io project page you have a link for you YouTube. Stil my recommendation is to also share the link in the Jam page, so everyone can listen to your music.

Oddly I get some more PS1 or PS2 era games vibes that are reminding me of some dungeon crawler games like Kings Field (though with a more modern sound). The atmosphere you’re creating is quite intriguing and feels like a mix of mysterious and adventurous (hence the dungeon crawler comparison I guess). Your sound choices also fitted that very well and lets my nostalgia heart melt a bit. The general mix is solid, but I feel the master could use some fine adjustments (keep in mind this is very much nitpicking and should be seen as general recommendations and not as a critique). The lower mids do sound a bit stuffy at times (specially when more instruments are playing at the same time like at the 2min mark). Additionally, the high mids are a bit shouty for my ears, specially with the lead synth entering. So my recommendation would be looking into the ranges 450-800 hz and 2k-4khz and dipping some frequencies just a few db, possibly even using a dynamic EQ to keep those frequencies with other situations.

It has a soft Mario galaxy like vibe that would lend itself very well for maybe a dreamier or narrative-based game. While the vibe and sounds are very good, I feel like there are some points that could improve. First of is the soprano sax on lost. It is quite off key and REALLY needs some retuning. While the slight off key sound might be cool it is a bit to much in this case. Second thing could be compression. All songs sound a bit to open to my taste and might would be a bit to open for working as background music in a game and maybe a bit still to dynamic. So I would think some slight more compression would help here compacting the sound and glueing it more together. Keep in mind the compression thing is just a minor thing that would make it sound more professional and like it would be in a true award-winning game. But this is nothing that hinders the listening experience.

All in all a nice little contribution with some beautiful dreamy vibes.

Hey there, I’m Einel! A young composer and producer based in Germany. I am specialized in professional sounding productions that are more ambient and emotional with everything between guitar, orchestral or synth based music. But could also go all out if needed to. If you like to hear some of my work, use the following link to get to my streaming services:

Spotify: EinelTheFox | Spotify

Bandcamp: Music | EinelTheFox

I’m open for any questions and hearing about your game vision.

Hey there, this is Einel (or David) I am a composer, multi-instrumentalist and audio engineer based in Germany. Hard to say where my genre really is, since there is everything from orchestral, hybrid (orchestral and synth), EDM to some other upcoming projects based in Prog Rock, Metal or Jazz.

 Most of my work can be found on BandCamp: https://einelthefox.bandcamp.com/music

 For other streaming services use the following link: https://wonderl.ink/@einelthefox

If you like what you hear, feel free to contact me for any collabs or project work.

First of all, you nailed the sound of those older shoot’em ups. With every song having fantastic head bop energy, like only Initial D could :D. This also makes a lot of sense why you are looking into some Eurodance/Eurobeat right now, since it kind of has the same energy. Production wise only the intro songs feel a bit like the odd one out, since it is way more bass heavy and also seem to distort a bit on the higher transients. Otherwise this really sounds good as it is and could go 1:1 into a game.

I will mostly base my critique on the first song “Unseen Realms Final” since this is the finished song. I really hope that you will be able to give the other song the treatment you want to give it.

There is a lot going on that one might not catch on the first listen. Production wise there isn’t a lot I would like to change. Maybe there are here and there some frequencies I’d rather take down a notch, but I’m also quite sensitive to everything over 2k, so it might be my hearing.

The only I think I would give as an recommendation, is to maybe start playing more with your sound design. With this song production wise you are on point, but it feels a bit empty and sterile. So from a sound design stand point you might be able to add some points of interest to add some playfulness and flourishment. Like the bass drum having a slow delay effect and the vocals widening more with a stereo ping pong delay that makes it shimmer on the left and right. Maybe also the drones could use some extra modulation like a phaser or flanger to get some extra movement. Keep in mind these are nitpickings to the overall productions, but might elevate the otherwise good production and add something more.

Musically I could really see this song in 3 different settings. As just an ambient soundtrack this works very well and could go into a game or movie just as it is. But for an album I could see it go 2 different directions. Maybe following it up with a song that is more inspired by Arvo Pärt (like Magnificat), that is also a choral and with the more meditative interweaving writing of Arvo would fit perfectly. Second idea is something darker like Ben Frost that would fit with the darker more ambient side of this song, like in his work for the show “Dark” or “1899”.

This is just lovely. It has everything one could ask for. It is playful, ambient and very well fitting the given theme. Can’t really say anything else. Your composition is spars but fittingly and there isn’t really anything I would think of how to improve upon what you already have. Maybe just a bit nitpicking mixing wise since specially the second song sounds a bit cloudy at some parts, that is due to some lower mids being a bit to strong (I would guess between 350 and 500 hz). But nothing that hinders the listening experience.