I'm very much a tinkerer when it comes to trying to learn stuff, even if it's not the most practical way of learning x3 So most of what I have managed to pick up has been through experimenting, haha. I struggle to find tutorials that I can actually follow >.< I don't know what it is about my darn brain, but instructions have to be written in a very specific way for me to actually understand. I guess that could be my ASD in play there. Many a time I have gone to look up help for stuff, spent ages reading through people's advice and instructions on how to achieve certain things, and just been utterly baffled by it. I often wind up super frustrated. It's as though the instructions are missing key steps, perhaps because they assume the reader would already have that knowledge, but it leaves me lost. So then I just resort to brute-forcing a problem again, haha.
I kinda get what you mean about thinking stuff would be better with visuals because I sometimes come up with ideas for audio dramas, only to buckle and end up making them as VNs instead (pretty much what happened with Darling Duality xD cos it wasn't reeeeally supposed to be a VN, haha.) I'm not sure I could ever go back to thinking about making things as text or audio-only based now because I've been infected by the VN bug x3
I'll have to give Giraffe Academy a look up when I get a chance then! With any luck, I might actually be able to follow the courses :3
Yeah, I definitely enjoy being a solo dev, but not being able to cover all the roles that a team would can sometimes be frustrating >.< Oh, how I wish I could draw! I actually used to think years ago that I would never be capable of working as part of a team cos of my anxiety, and that solo would always be the way to go for me, but after taking the plunge to team up for last year's otome jam and spooktober vn jam, I can honestly say that I reckon being part of a team made each project more fun to work on :3 Especially Limbo Line for spooktober cos that was a pretty big team when you include all the voice actors who were involved. There was such wonderful energy! And there's no way I could've come up with everything that's in the game were I on my own. It was just one of those lovely patches in time where all the pieces of the puzzle fit perfectly together ^-^ I think I was hyper pretty much all of September thanks to that, haha. It's really difficult to describe the sheer amount of joy I felt while working on that project with everyone.
All of my stuff has been self-indulgence too pretty much, haha. I don't think I'd even be capable of working on something that I wouldn't be interested in playing myself. I was actually approached last year by someone scouting for writers for a vn-style romance app on mobile. It was paid work, but with pretty strict deadlines. They wanted a sample story to see if I'd be a good fit if I were interested, and encouraged me to take a look at their current content to get an idea of what their users like to read. Since I'm broke and relatively unemployable, I thought I'd give it a shot. Well, I did not enjoy any of the chapters I sampled one bit >.< I tried a few different opening chapters of various genres, but none of them were my cup of tea. I could clearly see the sort of stuff they were after. Essentially smut stories, where choices had next to no impact, the story itself was practically non-existent, the characters were all shallow, and the steamiest of scenes were locked behind a paywall so that users would be forced to purchase the in-game currency to even see them.
Despite that, I attempted to come up with something I thought would be suitable. I purposely dimmed down the details and tried to focus on the tension-building (because one of their guidelines was to have a climactic moment + corresponding choice that could be a microtransaction in every chapter, even though the chapters were only a 5-15 minute read), but I was told that there was still too much detail and not enough drama in my submission >.< They gave me another couple of days to submit a revised version, but I was just honest and told them that I couldn't do it. I already pretty much despised what I submitted the first time. If I shaved any more off of it it would have just been a pointless husk. I could already feel a creeping dread at the thought of having to write an entire story like it, so I backed out. The money wouldn't have been worth the misery it would have caused me.
But yeah, I totally agree that the struggle makes any sort of payoff that much sweeter :3 I'm still blown away every time I get a nice comment on one of my projects! I'd carry on making stuff for as long as I'm enjoying doing it even if nobody else knew it existed, but every single bit of positive feedback I get from others is enough to fuel my hope that I might someday be able to actually make a living doing what I love. I'd rather die than slave away for someone else doing something that I hate anyways (sidenote: I think it was working in retail for a short while that really made that attitude flourish!)
I really should stop rambling anyhow cos I've just gone off on a really long one again, sorry xD I hope you do manage to bring some of your ideas to life in VN form though cos that would be brilliant :3