I played the game but it run very slow on my potato. I got to the point where you fly the drone, but couldn't do it past that point with 3fps and 2 seconds of input latency XD.
My feedback:
Pros:
- The dialog is well written;
- I like the characters faces, their expression conveys their personality well, and are nicely drawn;
- The theme is good, futuristic stealth;
- The drone idea is good although I couldn't experience it (XP);
- The camera work is good, I liked how it moved when you get near the window;
- Music fits the game;
- The UI pops in and out according to your actions, keeping it clean;
- I liked how you used the dialog to tell the player to use the pause menu;
- You use a lot of blue tones for the background and objects, which gives a specific aesthetic and works well with the theme.
Cons:
- Dialog goes on for a bit longer then I would expect it to. Especially in the start of the game, when the player usually wants to get a feel of the gameplay;
- Things going wrong right from the start isn't ideal from the plot perspective, I think... I don't like stories to be formulaic, but usually you want things to go wrong to build up tension right before some resolving or climax. In terms of the character doing the mistake, maybe you wanted to make him a bit clumsy but usually you want to show his strengths first to get the audience invested and then his weaknesses to make him relatable. In manga you see this a lot, where characters are first depicted as rebellious and badass, and later you get to know their clumsy/silly side. But again if you go too far in this direction you are at risk of being formulaic or derivative, so you have to find the balance;
- You have a lot of keys to use! It can work in a long game, since the players will have a lot of time to get used to it, so it really depends on the length of your game.
Pretty good start for your game overall!