I think when it comes down to it you just need to get to building something no matter how small it is. Game jams are a great place to do that cause you get to just experiment and make something nice in a couple of days. There's lots of courses on YouTube of just devs making a complete game in a couple of hours and when you watch enough of those I find that you are able to kind of pick their brains and get a good understanding of how you should approach making games. But I definitely think you should just give a game jam a shot you can be a solo dev, use basic shapes, and make something small to give you that initial boost of confidence. I have a game jam that is going to happen in a week or so and you can join if you want very beginner friendly

Hey! I love your initiative—game jams are a great way to grow fast. If you're still looking for someone to team up with, I’d be happy to connect and learn together. Let’s build something fun!