itch.io

This was a cute short story that I think could've been expanded.

The visuals and the UI are definitely the biggest highlights. The main menu's buttons flickering alive was a really cool visual, and the lil stamp backgrounds for character busts was really cute. Almost everything is animated and colorful, so it was an extremely enjoyable experience all-around.

I enjoyed the story for what it was- a short romp on a deserted island, after being accidentally abandoned by your tour guide, with four sexy wolves who're all gay and want to fuck you. The main issues just come from the four wolves looking too similar visually. Despite each of them getting their own unique, intricate outfits with small details that you only appreciate when you focus on each of them individually, they're then all just posted up in the same exact pose with the same faces and neck fluff. This then extends to the sex scene, where each of them fuck you the exact same way- which isn't bad on it's own, I honestly think that'd be fine if we didn't also use the exact same animation of Pepper's ass getting railed. I assume this might've been an issue with the Jam time limit, because I can tell that a lot went into the games' visuals otherwise.

The characters' personalities were also something I think need to be expanded on. I can see the framework of each of them being a bit different from one another, but because they all talk similarly and are conjoined at the hip, we never get a chance to explore any of them deeper than the surface level. The Truth or Dare sequence was a great idea to get them to open up more, but it could've gone further before we started humping, I feel.

Aside from that, the game needs to have a save-load function asap, alongside a settings menu to change volume and a history menu in case anyone skips past dialogue. These are basic mechanics that should be in every visual novel, no matter what.

I enjoyed the game for what it was, and I'm going to be eyeing future projects, but it definitely need a bit more polish.

Honestly, I want to say as little as possible because I don't want to spoil anything, and I think this is a story genuinely worth experiencing on your own.

It's hard to parse my feelings about this one. The art direction is extremely evocative and conveys all the necessary emotions to the reader through its simplicity. I'm sure everyone's already mentioned it, but the sun breaking through the paper background was so genius, my jaw hit the floor. More than that, I immediately resonated with the isolation and loneliness that the wolf had felt, based solely on the black and white paper visuals you'd used during The Wolf and the Sun story; excellent work. I liked the writing style, but sometimes it felt very difficult to understand what was being said or the underlying meaning- I needed to reread a couple lines, before the lightbulb went off in my head, but some of that was probably just me being stupid. 

My favorite part, by far, was Lucas' undying hope, even when face-to-face with devastation. Even then, he believed that the wolf would eventually find his footing without him by his side, and something about that felt very... I'm not sure, uplifting? Inspiring. Truly, he was the sun.

I wanna start off by saying that I am more than excited for an eventual continuation of this story. I think both Ren and Lucan are extremely interesting characters, because they're so diametrically opposed. Lucan feels like a much more down-to-Earth type character. He lives a boring life; he goes to work and comes back to an empty home with nothing to do. He's under constant pressure from his mother to continue his business name, and she's singularly focused on that sole objective, while his wife is likely running around and cheating behind his back. Ren is, instead, a much more enigmatic force-of-nature type character. Everything they do is painted with a veneer of feeling all too friendly, like they're looking for something to poke and prod at in every conversation. What they say, what they do- it's nearly impossible to tell where the thin line of truth begins and ends with Ren, and I felt like, at some point in the stories' future, we're going to be goaded into believing the truth is just another lie.

I'm interested to see the folklore theme of The Boy Who Cried Wolf be explored more in the future, but as it stands right now, it feels more like an addendum attached to the end of the story to qualify for the Jam Theme. To be fair, though, I don't really think 'matching the theme' matters, as long as the story is good, and what's here is definitely intriguing. I especially loved that, because Lucan sees absolutely zero affection in his daily life, he becomes the perfect target for someone like Ren- who, otherwise, I felt like had their red-flags extremely well telegraphed before the reveal in the bathroom. Lucan is so desperate for affection, he ignores those red-flags and jumps straight into the beast's paws (HE'S JUST LIKE ME FR). Regardless, I also liked that I wasn't really able to keep up with Ren, even knowing that there was probably something deeper beneath the surface. It kept them more than interesting, and I'm excited to see where their plan goes next.

Presentation is definitely the game's strongest suit. The art is extremely vibrant and expressive, and the bathroom scene was a major highlight, both in writing and visuals. I'm not a big fan of the text being so slow, which seemed like a symptom of having so many lines just skip straight on by, which seems to be a common complaint. I think it should be used a bit more sparingly, because otherwise players have to either scroll back a line or two, or have to open the history menu, which does your excellent writing a disservice imo. 

I'm very excited to see how Jane Doe ends, because this is a very strong start.

(I had to write this again from memory because the first draft got deleted, hope it ends up sounding coherent)

Around the time that I reached the halfway mark of A Wolf in Charleston, I thought that there could be no way the game was going to conclude anytime soon with so many remaining plotlines to close out, and I ended up being right, with there being about forty-fiveish minutes left of reading. In spite of that, because of what the game is trying to tackle, I felt like it needed a lot more time to properly flesh everything out before the ending. Ambitious, is the word I would use to describe it.

The body horror elements are easily the best part about the game- from the extra wolf finger poking out of Oliver's hand to Luis' entire body going limp with his self ripping straight out of his back during sex- they were nasty in the most perfect way. However, I think the rest of the story could've done with a lot more subtlety, especially when it came to tackling politics and religion. I know the lack of subtlety is the point, and we're often shown horrors inflicted upon werewolves, but because of the 25k word count, the game isn't able to linger on any event for too long before having to move onto the next, and I think this also lead to a lack of perspective and reflection in the narrative. I specifically thought it strange that there didn't seem to be a single person who didn't want to immediately kill werewolves on sight, or decide to argue on their behalf, knowing that- at one point- the werewolves used to be human too, so killing them would be an injustice or immoral. That might be the point, since the game is a town filled with religious zealotry, but it left the narrative feeling too black and white for my taste- werewolves pretty much end up always being good and humans are scum sucking villains or completely indifferent. Honestly, the most gray we get from the narrative's morality, ironically, comes from Oliver's father. To me, it felt like Reverend Crane was the kind of man who was extremely religious and protective over his son, but would've been open to eventually accepting his son as a werewolf (in spite of not being able to accept himself). That might be a complete misread from me, considering the ending fight, but it's hard to say where the monster starts and where Randolph Crane ends, and that was the kind of subtlety I enjoyed.

Admittedly, I will say that I'm not the biggest fan of stories that treat gayness as analogous to monsters, so the game was fighting an uphill battle with me from the start. Knowing that about myself, I can still recognize that the story is expertly written and interesting enough to keep me invested and excited to see where Oliver and Luis' relationship was going to lead.

While I really like Luis, he ended up feeling more like a catalyst to Oliver's realization that he might be gay. He still ended up being a fully fleshed out character with his own wants/needs and opinions on humans, but I felt like he was often moved to the side, because the actual focus of the game's narrative was Oliver's self-discovery- which makes sense, as both a new werewolf and main character. I think I would've just liked to see more of both his past and more of his relationship with Oliver and/or Zizi (but that's also me just being greedy).

I've rambled on enough, so I'm just going to quickly list out some of the things I liked the most.

Like I said, the body horror was absolutely nerve-wracking to witness and read, only highlighted by the incredible art and sound direction. The game's presentation as a whole is some of the best, especially with anything related to Oliver's hands. The music stings used throughout are also a nice treat, really punctuating important moments. A lot the game's focus was put on Oliver's inner turmoil of being a werewolf and hiding that from people, which felt both realistic and gritty; his inner monologues are a particular treat for me. The game was perfectly tense all throughout and kept me on the edge of my seat, especially during any discussion related to mercy-killing, as I had a feeling where the story was going to eventually lead.

Overall, A Werewolf in Charleston is an absolutely enthralling read, mainly held back by a 25k word count. If it wasn't restricted by the Jam's rules, I would've definitely liked to see where the story could've gone and I imagine a lot of my issues with the narrative would've either been explored or non-existent. In the end, I think it's just not a story made for me, and that's okay; I just hope that it gets all the recognition it deserves and more, because like I said, what's here is more than excellent.

Despite only being one chapter long and ending with a 'To Be Continued,' My Tainted Life easily avoids the common pitfall of feeling like the writers had to choose a spot at random to end the game abruptly for the deadline, and instead makes sure that readers walk away feeling satisfied by the conclusion. Honestly, you could tell me that the game was a completed project, with the intent to leave readers imagining the type of adventures Manfrey and Chris get up to after slaying the miasmic bear, and I would believe you- that's how good the writing and pacing is.

As for the art, the game's presentation is some of the best I've ever seen. Sprites are just detailed enough with their borderless style that it almost emulates old pop-up book art. The backgrounds and CGs, instead, are rendered with grandiose lighting and texturing, which helps the game's art direction feel balanced in a way that I'm not sure I can describe. I like it- is my point- and I was most impressed by the CG used for the sparring fight between Manfrey and Chris, which perfectly posed the characters to show their varied fighting styles. During long stretches of dialogue, however, the sprites end up feeling a bit too stiff and don't change or shift around enough for my personal taste. The main example that comes to mind is right after the sparring CG; the innkeeper comes back and stands between Frey and Chris on the screen, watching them fight. Even as the text continues to describe their fight, the innkeeper is just standing in the center, and it became distracting for me.

The writing is very impressive, almost every line feels perfectly hand-picked, especially during the fight scenes. I was enthralled by Chris' character and Frey's ideals, and I'm excited to see how those two clash and come to understand one another as the game continues in future updates. The one piece of writing I didn't like was the kiss scene. The kiss itself felt like great set-up for a romantic subplot between the two, but them snuggling in bed together afterwards made me feel like I somehow skipped a bunch of dialogue. At that point, I felt like like the two had come to see each other as fellow warriors, not lovers, and they almost immediately go back to how they were acting before the kiss.

Overall, those small flaws don't hold it back from being an excellent experience that I'd easily recommend others play, and I'm extremely optimistic about the game's future, if this is what your team can do in just a month.

I found that Witchtrap was an enjoyable game, for what it is. Unfortunately, I think the game is largely held back by the fact that it's essentially just the intro to a much larger project, and wasn't able to put enough focus on either the story or characters as a result.

I can't be too mad about the grammar and spelling issues, knowing that English is probably not your first language, so I won't harp on about that, instead I'll say that I think the game's pacing is excellent; I felt that every event lasted just long enough to not overstay their welcome, but also short enough that I was left wanting to see what would happen next. The tense moments in the story, however, are undercut by the snarky dialogue of every character in the game- with maybe an exception to Luiz, who's the only one that didn't feel like he was constantly throwing out one-liners, but that also might be because he was given the least amount of focus out of the whole cast. On that note, while I did enjoy some of the banter between Jane and Marcus, especially the 'pawjobs don't count' line, it often felt like everyone's personalities were blending together too much to differentiate themselves from their roles in the friend group.

The concept is extremely strong, and I loved the reveal that one of the 'players' is actually a witch. I love deduction games and trying to work out which of the four characters might be the witch seems like it's going to end up being really engaging- especially if there are different routes. I'm excited to see where this project goes from here, I'll definitely be keeping a close eye on it in the future.

Also, I already really like Marcus, so if anything happens to him, it's on sight.

Hi, I wanted to let you know that I've just released an Android version. I'm sorry about before and thank you for your interest in the game. Let me know if anything needs to be fixed <3

Thank you for the answer 💙

I have a question about uploading an android version of my game. I assume I already know the answer, but I wanna make sure.

I never altered or changed the basic assets that Ren'py uses for a phone's UI during the Jam, so I wanted to know if I change those files now, it would automatically disqualify the game from the Jam Rating Phase, correct?

There's nothing wrong with the base assets, so I'm fine using them, I'm just curious. 

The only issue is the name boxes clip over the text box a little bit, but not the text itself, so it's like... that's fine, who cares lol

Thank you, all of the art used in the game was made by me!

Hi, I'm sorry, but I didn't make an Android version, and I don't think I can update the game with any new files until MayWolf's rating phase is over.

After that, I'll look into building an Android version and add it to the page.