Indie game storeFree gamesFun gamesHorror games
Game developmentAssetsComics
SalesBundles
Jobs
Tags

aratlon

13
Posts
1
Topics
9
Followers
17
Following
A member registered May 01, 2020 · View creator page →

Creator of

Recent community posts

First of all, how can you steal this idea from my head? (joking) I had a similar idea but nothing fully developed.

About the game: I don't know if this is cannon but I love the idea of the beta site. Especially with regard to the game. A small detail that holds everything together so well.

About the criticism:

The worst thing in my opinion is the readability. The background is great but maybe adding a black or blue text background with 05 - 15 % transparency could improve the readability a lot. Especially the blue of the stars and the font are very similar. I had highlighted the text to make it easier to read. (but I am also dyslexic)

Secondly: The second page is actually very filled. The marging on the left and right is ok, but there is not much space at the top and bottom. Likewise, the patting in the Scenario List is almost not there. Maybe reducing the number columns, the header and maybe reordering the designation table from 3 rows and 2 (4) columns to 2 rows and 3 (6) columns could create more space.

Lastly: I don't understand what the planet designation is supposed to do and mean exactly (but this can be a purely me problem).

But that's complaining at a high level. As has already been mentioned, the prompts are fun and capture the theme very well. So it's a good game.

Hello thank you for your explanation:

First about the diceFirst about the dice...

ok so both roll the same ammount of dice. This is a good way to guid to a more narrativ play style because the only way the employee can get an advantage is by using their proficiency. Otherwise it is just luck. (i still don't understand the "player will ask to roll nd6 / nd12 ...."

Regarding the proficiency, weakness and fear...

In my opinion, this should be mentioned in the rules, for example in a parenthesis in the chapter Character Creation.

On level 5, the Employee will encounter things that they shouldn't able to see - symbols, figures, sounds, places. As long as the circles haven't filled up when on this level, they could uncover "The Truth" (whatever it is), but once it filled up, they'll out of the game.

i like that idea. This could be mentioned as well.

Ok for (In)Sanity Level, you only go up to Lv. 5 where the employee will be faced with The Truth (which eventually died).

But that's not what I meant. I was referring to the fact that if the employee has already been promoted three times, they have a total of 16 sanity circles. Does they reach a new sanity level at 10 filled circles (as it says in the rules) or 16?

If it is always 10, then gaining sanity circles is pointless for a promotion. If at 16, the wording should be adjusted.

cheers

Aratlon

A small base to create a character.

I like the disclaimer page. It's always good to clarify things like that and it also gives the impression that you've done some research on the subject. The list of past's also seems to be well elaborated.

Again, stats are explained but then other stats come up that also require dice. How is Composure related to health and defence?
It is also noticeable that it is not explained how many points / dice you can distribute to create your character. It is also not clear why each character should have its own genre. Furthermore, it is not clear how the game progresses after the creation.

It looks like a nice little mini-game. There are only three stats here and they are all used, which I think is good. The individual steps also feel complete and, together with the hard mode options, this could be quite fun. Here, the other dice are also used a bit. I like it.

I just wonder what the gp in the "Type of Car wanted" table says about the car? I don't know anything about cars, maybe it's obvious.

I think if one works on it a bit more and maybe adds a few more rules, it could even function as a solo RPG.

An interesting use of the DiceGoblin system. A race promises a short but possibly fulfilling game.

But here, as with the other modules, I miss the use of the other dice. Mud and Sand require twice the number of successes instead of changing the dice category.
Again, all the stats are introduced and then on the next page you are told to do a Weapons Roll. It is not clear to me how this is done.

I like the maps. Maybe some additional information would be useful. e.g. this shortcut needs X successes to be used; here there is ice and therefore cars faster than X have to do a handling test....

I don't really understand what this is. Is it an add on for the Dice Goblin rulebook? As such it has a lot of duplication with the basic rulebook. It is also not explained under what circumstances this fusion works. Nor how stability and instability (does it really need both stats?) are affected in the game.

Again, I miss the integration of the other dice. Why, for example, isn't the average of the stats taken and one cube category lower instead? Instability also mentions that decisions have to be made together. How does this work with NPCs?

Otherwise, the points are the same as in the DiceGoblin system.  I like the other modules better.

An interesting concept. I like the basic idea that each die is a success that results in the two highest numbers. Even though it is no longer used in the rest of the rulebook. For example, defending against a Hevy Weapon only allows the highest number (at least I think that's what you mean by "only on an 8", otherwise rolling an 8 with a roll of 6 is pretty difficult).  It does not say that the defender simply has to take 2 dice categories higher.

It is also not clear to me how the character creation works. Apparently you have to distribute the number of dice over the 5 stats. But then there are also the categories Weapons, Health and Defence. These also seem to need dice. And how many do you have available by default?

Also, why is XP mentioned but not really explained or backed up with numbers? The milestones fit the system much better.

Apart from that, there are still some errors in the texts. For example, in Rolling Attacks, dame is written instead of damage. The Defence example also says that 24 damage is done with 4 successes, but Range only does 3 damage per success.

Except for the strange border at the bottom (and the cover picture) I like the layout. Especially the tables look good and easy to read. The pages are well filled without seeming too crowded.

Actually, I just wanted to take a little break from work and got this in the random draw, with some tasks I'm trying to escape from. :)

But to the game: I like it. It's quite simple but offers enough to build up a story.

Just a few follow-up questions (maybe I missed it): How many dice do the employees roll? And how does the Proficiency, Weakness and Fear come into play (is it purely narrative?)?

I don't know if this is intended but when you are promoted you have more (In)Sanity, should you still reach the next Insanity level at 10 or when all circles are filled?

I also find the expression "There are four phase / day / player" quite confusing. I think you mean "There are four phase per day per player".

But all in all, it sounds like a game that you can just put on the table (you always have dice with you anyway) and play a bit. Good work.

In itself, this looks quite good, but it is hardly more than was given in the CALTROP CORE SRD.


I love random tables, so my personal opinion: I would have liked a D44 table (4 tables with 4 items each) with events that happen to you. Like some others who use the CALTROP CORE SRD have done.  This way it is too free for me.

About me: I have almost no idea about horses and prefer games that have a goal. So that you can put the criticism into perspective.

In general it is a good one page RPG. You know what to do and you get a good idea of the gameplay.


As a dyslexic, I had a bit of trouble reading it. The font is a bit difficult, especially the distinction between f, t, i and l.

I also noticed a few phrases that didn't sound right to me. But since I have English as a second language, I could be completely wrong. Therefore, please ignore all my suggestions. Oh, and the file names should ideally also be in English. I didn't know what "liggande" was. :)

Bottom line: It makes you want to try it out, I like the character sheet and especially as a debut work I find it quite good.

I have a weakness for this kind of niche simulations. The ones that illustrate a few special processes with maths without unnecessarily adding a lot of side aspects.

The layout could be reworked a bit. Packing the trainings into a table, for example. And a few graphics could also loosen things up.

So there are a few errors:

Under trainings: "Speed IV+: Min Level" (the plus)

under trainings point: "Levels 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, Level 4 to 5; Requires 15 Training"

Also under Trainings points: "Are considered low High Level" or did you mean something like semi profi level?


But all in all i really like it.

P.s.: I haven't done the math yet, but wouldn't it be very easy to make money by buying a horse that has level 5 on many stats (500$ per stat), train it by one level and sell it again (per stat on level 6 is 3000$)? That sounds like a huge profit margin.

Soo i am back.

Sorry it took so long. But in the meantime we were sick, have renovated and then sick again. But now we have thoroughly looked at every word and every meaning and this would be the result:

https://www.canva.com/design/DAE-dCBmJKY/NTDcUgWgxiUmE0BRDOZiDw/view?utm_content=DAE-dCBmJKY&utm_campaign=designshare&utm_medium=link&utm_source=publishsharelink&mode=preview

I hope you can use it to create your own German version.

best regards

hello,

This is my first Itch Jam, so if this approach  of mine is not ok you are welcome to just delete it. 

I wanted to ask if there is some interest in translating the tamplet into other languages? In my case i would offer to translate it into German. 

Best regards

Aratlon