Post by Melancholy Marionette in Bitter/Sweet Blythe comments

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I’m somehow still not fully better, but much better than I was, just got a lingering pesky cough and still feeling tired all the time >.<

You could probably learn to make music the way I do it :3 I pretty much just experiment with stuff x3 I don’t actually have a clue what I’m doing, haha. I just keep trying to put bits together like a puzzle until it sounds like something I like. Basically use a big library of short loops and samples. I have a lot from music producer Humble Bundles at this point! But you can get started with that sorta thing for free cos there are sites like looperman where users upload loops that anyone can use :3 They list the key & tempo so it makes it a lot easier for music noobs like me to find the sorta stuff I’m looking for!

That’s cool :3 I used to be into more violent yanderes back when I made SR (provided the loving side of them was still evident), but I’ve grown kinda tired of them recently x3 So I’d definitely like to try and write some softer ones like orange Blythe in the future :3

I feel ya on it feeling like people are looking at you and judging you >.< I can’t walk past a group of strangers who happen to laugh without automatically thinking they’re laughing at me for some reason >.<

I cried at the end of a therapy session recently cos of what we were discussing, and I kinda just broke down while telling her I feel like my world is so, so tiny because the only place I feel safe is in my house x3 And I just wanna be able to go outside and enjoy life instead of being trapped indoors so much.

Yeah, LPB is definitely amazing :3 I dunno what I’d do without the kind people in the world that actually take the time to listen and hear you out when you’re stuck in a pit.

I have a feeling I know what could’ve caused your crash in Tunnel Vision x3 That point that you described is a big loading point in the game, haha. It basically loads the entire 2nd half of the game right there, and so if there are any memory problems with a device, it will most likely crash T_T On my potato laptop, that load takes like a full 60 seconds to finish >.<” On my PC, it’s like 5 seconds, haha. I wish I knew how to optimise stuff better though because I’m pretty sure Ren’Py doesn’t have problems like that, so I dunno why it’s such an issue in Unity :(

I’m honestly surprised to hear you managed to play Dawn of the Damned on it :o I would’ve thought that one would’ve crashed or bugged out in some way on Winlator x3 but it’s good to know! I imagine that Limbo Line would probably crash on a load the same as Tunnel Vision did >.< And Apartment No.9 probably would as well cos all 3 of those are larger games with longer loads.

Anyways, I’m really glad you’ve been able to check out as much as you have and I appreciate you playing em :3

vocaloidsrcool2 years ago(+1)

I'm really happy to hear that you are feeling better, but now I'm worried about something else. I heard in a devlog that you broke your arm and wrist, and that since you broke it before that it might not heal fully. Did it completely heal? I really hope so. A few months ago, my cousins' dog bit my right arm twice in the same spot, and that is my dominant arm too. It's better now, but I have a little understanding of how you feel.

Thank you for the link! I'll try it sometime. I just hope that me being on a phone instead of a laptop won't make the process hard.

I'm looking forward to meeting those future yanderes! But, for now, Orange Blythe is definitely my favorite out of the ones from your games.

I completely understand. In a library some years ago, I was sure someone was talking about me. I was having a bad hair day, and they told their friend that they just saw someone who's hair was messed up. I had to fix myself up in the bathroom after that. XD Social anxiety is such a pain.

Well, I haven't been outside in five years, so I know how you feel. Like I said, interacting with people is terrifying, and stressful for me, but, sometimes I wonder how different things would be if I took the courage to go outside. But, I'm too much of a coward to leave my safe space/comfort zone.

Those kinds of people are the ones I feel most comfortable around: people who provide support, and who you can lean on. I'm glad to have someone like that, even if my only interaction with them is online.

That's okay! I'm still really glad that I can play your games at all. "Darling Duality" and "Bittersweet Blythe" are my favorites, by the way. I really need to thank the person who created Winlator, without that, I couldn't play some Ren'py games that get error messages on Joiplay, either.

Don't get me wrong - Dawn Of The Damned was super slow and laggy, but I could play it from beginning to end. However, I could only get one ending, because when I pressed start to start it over, it loaded for like twenty minutes, and that's when I lost my patience. XD It's unfortunate, because I told Dämmerung that I loved him, hoping to get a happy ending, but...wow, that was brutal. I wanted to try the other ending, but I guess I'm not patient enough. Maybe one day I'll try playing it again.

It can't be helped if a game has a large file size, though I was curious about Limbo Line. Honestly, though, I'm just eagerly waiting for the next update to Darling Duality. The demo is kind of big at around 970 mb though, so I'm worried that the full game with multiple routes will be too big for Winlator. Though, even if it is, I am happy with what I could play of the game.

And I appreciate you making them! You really make the best games.

Melancholy Marionette1 year ago

Sorry it's taken me forever to reply >.< I kinda just stopped all communication for most of December because I got too overwhelmed by life in general and couldn't really cope with anything :( So now I'm really badly behind on my replies and stuff >.<

My arm is pretty much fine now :3 It did heal okay in the end! It's still kinda weak, but no weaker than it was before the accident, haha. I did physio and stuff to build some muscle back, but I've always had weak arms xD That's awful that you got bitten twice though by your cousin's dog o.O I imagine that must've been incredibly painful!! I'm glad you healed okay at least, but man, still, that's a horrible thing to go through :( I hope you didn't end up with like nerve damage or anything!

Hehe, well, I imagine orange Blythe would be very happy about that x3 They ended up becoming my favourite too somehow, even though they're not even my type xD Just kinda wormed their way into my heart, haha.

I'm sorry your social anxiety is so bad :( People that have never had it just don't understand how debilitating it can be! Like my mum always used to say to me when I was younger, just get a job, that will fix it... and it's like, uhm, mum, that's not how it works >.< For starters, getting a job is like climbing a mountain when you have mental health problems, but then actually keeping a job if you get one is almost impossible! So much of many jobs requires you to have good social/people skills, so if you find speaking to people terrifying and stressful, how do survive in a job that requires you to do it constantly?!?! :(

For me, I find that going out in nature can help with my depression, but yeah, sometimes my social anxiety stops me from actually going out, haha. I generally don't leave the house without someone with me cos I often get too anxious/overwhelmed. If it wasn't for my dad, I'd probably just shut myself inside and never leave the house.

I do think it helps if you can manage to get out and do scary things and really push yourself out of your comfort zone, but actually forcing yourself to do that is extremely difficult >.< And even then, it's like sure, things might be a tiny bit less terrifying the next time, but they're still terrifying x3 It's so much easier to not have to constantly put your mind and your body through extreme stress.

I've been working on a project for Winter VN Jam that I hoped to release before Christmas but have failed to because too much stress and stuff has been happening and I haven't had as much time as I would've like to work on it >.< I'm aiming to try and release next Friday instead, but it's probably going to be missing some VA because the poor VA got ill before he could finish recording the script x3 I will just update in January to add it or something! I wonder if it will work on Winlator or not though. It's not a huuuuuge game. Only around 10k words. But there are a lot of assets in it because I tried to make my own CGs and I've edited a lot of sprites and backgrounds, haha. The current project size in Unity is 8GB, but that'll go down when it's exported + I haven't optimised any files yet!

Yeeeeah, 20 mins is too long to wait for loading, haha. The choices in Dawn of the Damned don't actually matter that much anyways x3 They impact what's happening throughout the game, but the endings are either determined from the very beginning depending on one thing, or from the timed choices right at the end.

I think the file size for DD when it's eventually completed will probably be horrific >.< I might be able to get it squished down a bit though now that I know a bit more about shrinking file sizes and stuff. Maybe I can make the layers a bit more efficient too, but yeah, I think the full version will be pretty hefty. I would imagine it'll be bigger than whatever SR's file size is! Definitely over 2GB once all the assets are in there cos it'll be a lot of sprites, CGs, and VA x3

That's very kind of you to say <3 It makes me really happy that you've had fun with my stuff :3 Really appreciate all your kind comments!

I hope you get to have happy holidays with lots of tasty noms involved!! ^-^

vocaloidsrcool1 year ago

It's okay - I know that life can be draining. Take a break whenever you need to.

My arms are weak, too, but that's because I'm really thin, and don't exercise, so it's my own fault.

It did hurt, and it bled a lot. We don't have a first aid kit, and no money to go to a hospital, so I had to wrap my arm in a towel until it stopped bleeding. We did have rubbing alcohol, just no bandages or cotton swabs, so I used a wash cloth to disinfect the areas.

I don't know about nerve damage, but if I try to tie an apron behind my back or something, my arm starts to hurt, and I have to stop moving it for a moment. That only happened once though, because I didn't do it again. Gonna go to the hospital when I can.

You wrote a character so well that you fell in love with him. That is a sign of a good writer. :)

My cousin never leaves me alone about getting a job. She says that I should work at a bookstore or a library since I like books, but I still have to talk to people, and I am really bad at math, so handling money would be difficult for me. I feel so bad though, that I am thinking about trying to find an online job, or maybe write a book, but...that's a whole other problem. Tight deadlines, overcoming writer's block...I don't think I can do it.

The only ones that I have around me are my cousins, and they contribute to my anxiety, so I can't go out with them. I don't mind opening windows if it's not too cold, though. That's enough for me.

My main issue is paranoia over what people might think of me, and a deep fear of interacting with others. After being bullied in middle school, and living with relatives that constantly fight, argue, criticize me and put me down, I'd rather not deal with the stress of dealing with others. The thought of it is terrifying, and thinking about how exhausted I would feel afterwards just takes away any motivation that I have.

It's okay to work on projects in your own time , and it's actually better if you take your time, so that you can be in the best mindset/headspace to complete it. That's fine, lots of games have partial voice acting; I just feel bad for the voice actor, and I'm sending love and kisses~ Whoa, eight gigabyte? All together to download it, and extract it, it would be over 16 gigabyte. And, even if it's a bit smaller, I would need to do a system reset to delete some files if it's not at least 4 GB to download and extract, making it 8 GB in total. I can't even play Genshin Impact because it's 16 gigabyte to download the data. XD

I see. I have to ask, without spoiling anything, is there a happy ending for everyone, including the player?

As long as the extracted file size doesn't exceed 7 or 8 gigabyte, I guess I'll be okay. I think Solipsism Reigns was 4 gigabyte...and I was still able to keep 2 GB of space. The issue is...there are too many preinstalled apps taking up space on my phone, but I don't want to try rooting my phone, cause I could break it. I reaaaally like Darling Duality, so I am willing to delete whatever I have to, to get it. The issue is if Winlator will play it. Will there be any long loading scenes in the game?

You're welcome. Your games help me escape my life for awhile. Especially Bitter/Sweet Blythe. If I had Orange Blythe in real life, I wouldn't need anyone else. That being said, I can distinguish reality from fiction, so I don't get too lost in fantasy; even so, sometimes it's nice to be pampered by a fictional guy. I am NEVER deleting this game. :D

I'll do my best to enjoy Christmas, and I hope you do the same. \(^O^)/

itch.io

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