You're actually a sadist. "Want to actually achieve your goal? Gotta do nothing and be bored. Want to play? Well, let me put health pickups and healing arrows in your way (thought magnets are good, huh?)."
:D It works surprisingly well. Unfortunately, it also shows why the whole theme is even an idea in the first place: Reversing some game design decisions just leads to some serious problems. Such as standing around being the best strategy. But with some massaging of mechanics, this idea could actually make for a cool game! Certainly stays true to its name :P