Thank you very much for the detailed comment! This was my first story and your feedback helps a lot. When adding the Pines in that moment, I was trying to give the character some "grounding"; otherwise, I would have felt like Crub agreeing to become a hero would be somewhat unjustified within the story, since up to that point I had only focused on showcasing that it was chaotic and dangerous, but now that I read it again it does feel out of place...
I will definitely work on restricting the pride; I personally really like long descriptions of stuff, but I definitely need to work on integrating actual story into it.
Again, thank you for the detailed reply!!!