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(19 edits) (+1)

Hi again,

I realised that aside from reporting errors and saying I liked the photos and piano, I haven't actually said anything about the game itself.

I like it a lot. The descriptions are short and clear, but they manage to bring across  the mood and tension anyhow. The NPCs I've met so far are intriguing, I'm especially curious to meet Rumualdo again.

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And now I do have some errors to report, or maybe something you didn't have time for before the EctoComp deadline:

--There are some buttons shaped like ribbons on the side of the game-window (which looks like a book, a travel journal; love that aesthetic choice!). The button labeled [ H ] ( for "Help"?) doesn't work. I should add that I'm playing the downloaded version, maybe that makes a difference.

--When talking to the Carabinero: 

"She didn't want to admit her son was dead,..." --> maybe "accept"  would fit better here?

--Talking to Matilda:

"I wouldn't dare to leave you alone at a time like this, and even less with such a servant" *I say joking* --> should be "jokingly"

--In Matilda's story about the "death" of her child, she doesn't once call her baby by its name. That strikes me as very odd, wouldn't a sad and concerned mother use her baby's name?

--In the Baby's Room:

The scissors in the window: "They are sticked into the doorframe " --> stuck into the windowframe, 

--Romualdo's version of the Tue-Tue tale with the farmhand:

"...when an owl that I most possibly alerted..." --> maybe "most probably" or "most likely"would be a better fit?

and a bit later in the same conversation, when Romualdo sees the farmhand at the campfire:

"I remembered what I had told him the previous night." --> But Romualdo was hiding in the bushes listening to the farmhand offer dinner to the owl. The farmer and Romualdo didn't speak to each other. Maybe just "I remembered what had happened the previous night", or "I remembered what I had heard himsay the previous night."  ?

-- Oh! It's a very nice touch that I can have a cup of tea and remember a list of things I should pay attention to. Lovely in-game help!

--It's weird that Amanda's description doesn't change after I've convinced her I'm Matilda's friend. She's still stern and brusque.

--When deciding to hide under the cradle:

"...Camilia should take me where they are keeping the baby hidden." -->This should be Camila , right? Without the i .

--On the path to the Grove, with the Tué-Tué's shadow:

"I sticked the scissors onto the ground" --> stuck the scissors into the ground

--When the housekeeper falls onto the scissors:

"There, right in front of my feet, lied the housekeeper..." --> lay

--Same thing a bit later:

"...the spot where I had sticked the scissors..." --> stuck

--At the altar:

"...a stone altar, where a naked and crying baby lied on top of it." --> lay

FINIS! 

Thanks for your game. I liked it a lot. I'll post a review on the Interactive Fiction Forum (intfiction.org) .

(+1)

I'm glad you enjoyed the game, and thank you so much for your feedback—it was very detailed and constructive.

Regarding the "H" marker, it's not for Help, but for History. It was originally going to show your most recent dialogue, but I disabled it due to compatibility issues between different languages. Since it's not a feature that impacts gameplay, I forgot to fix it and enable it before the jam ended.

(+1)

Thank you for a great game and the hours of fun I had with it. (In those hours, I also count the time away from the screen thinking about it and remembering the characters and the mood of the game. And that tense finale!)

My review is up at Rovarsson Licks Ectoplasm - Competitions - The Interactive Fiction Community Forum .

Have fun with the rest of the EctoComp entries, and I hope to see more of your work in the IF genre. In the meanwhile, I'll go check out some of your other games.

Best wishes, 

Rovarsson