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A jam submission

Deadly NightshadeView game page

A magical girl tale.
Submitted by Skysti — 1 hour, 1 minute before the deadline
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Deadly Nightshade's itch.io page

Results

CriteriaRankScore*Raw Score
Magical Girl Use#173.3814.000
Creativity#213.0433.600
Overall#222.6623.150
Gameplay#222.1972.600
Art#272.0282.400

Ranked from 5 ratings. Score is adjusted from raw score by the median number of ratings per game in the jam.

Theme(s)
My Very Best Friend

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Comments

Submitted(+1)

Nice work! This is a solid entry that with some polish could be really good! I've said it before on other entries, but I always appreciate original artwork in RPGmaker games. It really makes them stand out. I didn't even mind the battles with what appeared to be concept art. It seems a little unfinished, but I can see the vision of where this could be going.

The gameplay was fine, if a little difficult at first. The boss was way easier for me then the basic demons for some reason. My biggest critique is in the writing. I really like the story itself, but the actually dialogue is a little rough and has typos. I assume this is related to time, as this was a jam, but it stood out to me.

And as others have commented... darn! A cliffhanger! Leaves you wondering whats next. Hopefully you'll be continuing this project!

Developer

Thanks for your critique. English is not my native language so I have a hard time doing good dialogue. Have you any tips or reference I can use to improve my writing?

Submitted(+1)

I can imagine that would be difficult! I only speak/write a single language unfortunately. (Apologies to my language teachers in high school and middle school ;-; )

My first thought would be to team up with someone who can translate your writing. This would allow you to write the text and dialogue in your native language, and then let someone take care of making it smooth in another language.

If that's not an option, then I'd suggest using something like Google Docs or Microsoft Word. I actually do this all the time. English is my native language, but I'm no master writer. While using Google Docs or Word won't make things perfect, they'll at least perform a basic spelling and grammar check. I do all my writing in one of those programs, and then copy/paste it into the game engine.

I hope that's helpful to you! Keep up the good work. :)

Submitted(+1)

It's rough and unfinished but I think there's a lot of potential here.

The gameplay feels a bit rough around the edges. The movement speed is absurdly fast in magical girl mode- is this a bug or is it deliberate? Also, I started without weapons equipped, and there are no descriptions for the items so I didn't know which did what. Other than that it's stock RPG Maker gameplay, which is maybe uninspired but works well enough. The use of AP is unconventional but worked well I think.

The art grew on me. I like that it isn't the default RPG Maker art, and the style triggers a bit of nostalgia because it reminds me of the point-and-click adventures I used to play. I found some of it ugly at first, and once I realized all the characters had the same face I couldn't unsee it, but I liked it by the end and when a stock RPG Maker graphic showed up it was pretty jarring.

I liked the battle music a lot, but it doesn't loop properly. The sound effects between scenes were jarring especially since there's no overworld music. I'm assuming some of this stuff came down to lack of time.

The storytelling was generally quite good. In particular it managed to get enough backstory across without feeling like an excessive infodump, which can be a difficult balance to get right. I think the only thing I was really confused about was Camille's relationship with the main character. Are they friends, dating, something else?

Overall I liked this game and I'd like to see it polished up and continued. I second Uso's comment, though; it ended on a bit of a cliffhangar when things were just starting to get really interesting.

Developer

Thanks for your feedback. I didn't know what I was capable of, and I ended up lacking time. I'll fix and polish some things in the next update.

Submitted (1 edit) (+2)

Crap you stop the game when the story starting to be interested I want to know what came next now :)
Also thank for making a linux version

Developer

I'm glad I had time to upload the Linux version.

I'll likely do an update this year. Don't know if I'll finish this game, but I'll continue the story further and rework some things.