im new to everything, coding, game mechanics, art. you name it i have probably tried one point in my life and lost motivation.

my question here is 

where does it all start

as in how do i start making games, do i have to learn to code and become an expert before i can even think about putting a game idea in my head. or do i just make a game and learn along the way. god how do people even make up ideas for a game without stressing. how did you learn to code and develop games? was it all youtube? if so who helped you the most? or was it a class that you decided to randomly enroll in at school for that extra credit?

how does one start in game development and coding

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." -- Chinese Proverb

You might have heard that quote before, but it really summarizes the origins of any successful endeavor.

It all starts with your first small step.

First off, if you are just getting started, I would put coding out of your mind for a while. This is not the 1980s or 1990s where people like me were learning about making text adventures in Qbasic. This is 2020 and there are literally dozens of "code-free" or "code-lite" game engines out there. One I tried a while back was Crey.

Youtube tutorials are definitely helpful and there is also some good paid content on sites like Udemy.

Because games do require a lot of skill and knowledge to make, don't be afraid to enlist the help of others. In the game that I'm currently making, I hired one guy to do the sound effects. I hired another person to make spaceship models in Blender. All I had to do was add them to the game. Yes, there are people like Notch (Minecraft), Zun (Touhou) and Eric Barone (Stardew Valley) who go on to make great games single-handedly, but those are very exceptional cases.

My last bit of advice is this: Once you get started, keep moving! You're better off working on your game for just 1 hour a day, 7 days a week but staying excited and interested than working on it for 8 hours on Monday and burning yourself out. Treat it like a hobby, not a job.

To answer another of your questions: I got started with coding by reading Qbasic programming books (this was back in the 90s). Some people might raise their nose at this, but Qbasic is an excellent programming language for learning how to make very simple games. Text adventures in particular are very good for beginners for several reasons: You don't have to worry about sound, music, graphics, art, or complex game mechanics. If you can string together the silliest of stories and have a good grasp of cause and effect, you can make a text adventure. This will teach you the very basics of game design -- start, make choices, success or failure, repeat. 

Yeah, if this is really what you want to do, and you have a great idea, or at least an idea you love, break it down into concrete steps, substeps and things needed to make it a reality.

Then just move forward on those pieces, until they're all complete and your game's done.

Then launch it and promote it, and repeat the process. 

Also be sure to play to your strengths and enlist help where you lack ability. I've enlisted a musician for my game 'Miniature Multiverse' because I know that I'm not skilled there. But I am a very capable artist and while I'm not a strong coder I can certainly handle high-level 'visual code' in Construct 2 or Unity + Playmaker without too much difficulty, so that's how I handle most interactivity.  

But do realize indie gamedev is super competitive and odds of making a lot of money on it are extremely low. Don't expect much, especially early on with your first game.

Also, don't aim for things that are so ambitious they're impossible to realistically complete. Don't try to make a giant MMO, start small and build a proof-of-concept [usually with a ton of placeholder graphics and audio] first to make sure the crucial and hardest-to-solve mechanics work, and once you know the game can be made playable and fun in a limited state, focus on adding to that prototype with nice visuals and sound and more variations of existing interactions, more polished everything. 

For my game 'Miniature Multiverse' the idea was a first-person puzzle/adventure game [i.e. sort of a Myst-like] with realistic-looking O-scale miniature handcrafted graphics, it's cost me $1200+ and the concept began in 2010, but only moved forward in earnest around 2016 or so. 

I had a few key things to solve, at the outset - firstly how to capture panoramas inside a scale miniature gameworld, what software to use as a game engine, etc. I tried several engines and VR-tour softwares before realizing that this could work with Unity. As for the panoramic capture, the first steps were missteps but I eventually solved it when the cameras got compact enough and high-res enough that I could mount them inside the model setpieces without issue. [Prior to that I tried using a [then] high-end 14-mp, $140, digital point-and-shoot cam with optical zoom mounted above the mini world, capturing reflections off 2" chrome ball bearings with polar coordinate unwrap. The resolution that resulted was never good enough.]

Bu in 2016 I revisited this with the breakthroughs of the rapidly evolving Unity engine and modern, super-compact GoPro-type action cams. That's when I tested this all again and realized, yeah, I can do this. After that, been developing it heavily for four years, will try to release a full game by the end of 2020.