1 The bathhouse is the wooden building north east in aldyn right?
I've built it and even visited once before, but i can't visit now, it's just closed...
Glitch or some quest does this?

2. I'm at the point to decide whether to betray flaire or gain more trust, as of current update is there a way to unlock good, non-betrayal scene wit her or make her an ally?

1. It's not the wooden house. It's the building with the blue roof left of it.

2. There is no good path scene for Flaire yet, but it'll be added later.
Please be aware that changing your choice later won't be possible.

thnx
Also
War
Does fighting and winning war give you control of conquered land as of right now?
Cus if it does i might conquer drogania, else leave be for now

You can currently only tell Theremis that you want to prepare for war. Most of the preparations and the actual war system are not in the game yet though.