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Pathetic Weakling

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A member registered Jan 19, 2025 · View creator page →

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Do you have any questions regarding the rules, lore, or other? Feel free to ask them here and I'll try to answer them to the best of my ability!

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And so it begins...

EDIT for clarity: A new update is published every 37-55 days, on average, it takes 40 days (give or take), and it's nearing 50 days. A new update should be coming within next week. If it isn't, then we have a problem on our hands.

Maybe.

The game's currently going through the deepest ring of development hell and could get canned at any minute, so just try to stay optimistic.

Optimism is a rare thing these days...

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Sadly, the jumpscares are indeed meme clips. After all, why actually go through the effort of writing a joke when you can just copy an image from the internet and shove it in the player's face?

Happy (early) B-day to Glacier, hope tomorrow's the best.

Nope.

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Blame Clickteam

Do you need an ambulance?

Are you sure bud? I've had this dumb game downloaded since day one, and I didn't get any virus problems. Are you sure this is the only thing you downloaded?

Or is it just confirmation bias?

Welcome to the club, Tutz. You have been claimed by the rabbit. there is no escape. I recommend you make peace with your loved ones, because you will never leave this factory... and I don't mean that as a good thing.

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I'm aware my advice may not be helpful due to the difference in game-type, but I have plenty experience in game design (Game design for board/card-games, but games nonetheless). Rules are to board-games what code is to video-games (albeit with some caveats I'll clarify later.) Take everything I say with a grain of salt.

To Clarify: Humans and machine are different (duh). In a board-game's rules our human brains have the special ability to interpret any discrepancies and vagueness in rule books. But the machines in video-games function differently, to put into words: The good thing about machines is that they do exactly what you tell them to do. The bad thing about machines is that they do exactly what you tell them to do. Machines of code cannot interpret discrepancies or vague code; they take everything literally. If your code isn't bulletproof then the game you're making will break.

My advice...

Declutter: If you see a mechanic that isn't integral to the game, remove it. It may hurt to do it, but remove any easter-eggs until after the product is finished; old code can tarnish new code.

Scrutinize & Simplify: It will take a long time to do, but really look at your code. If you find a feedback loop, remove it. If you find a redundancy, remove it. If you find an error, fix it. It will be tedious. It will cause you to lose hope. But, trust me, the reward will be worth it.

DON'T RUSH IT: The community/fandom will be breathing down your neck the entire time, but do not give in to their siren's call and rush out the product, because YOU. WILL. REGRET. IT. No one wants a turd published when they were expecting gold. This will delay LDTF's release by another year or two, but the outcome will be worth it. The community will both be impatient and expect perfection; after all, you can't please everyone.

[Edit: Yes, I do see the irony of emphasizing not rushing things while rushing out this very comment]

I stand corrected.

But, even then, this still doesn't compensate for their uneven weight distribution and how their... err cup-size makes general movement cumbersome and difficult. I guess the supernatural part of their biology includes Mary Sue black-magic.

Tangent 1: I originally said "Mary Sue black-magic" as a joke. But, after I began thinking about it, I had a rather upsetting revalation. All of the LoveDolls and cult members (excluding Jerri, Gremmi, Slick, Slug, Mage, blah-blah-blah) classify as Mary Sues.

Allow me to explain, all of them have their wants granted to them, the most challenge they face is that their victims (I'm using victims in the heaviest sense of the word. It doesn't matter how "pleasurable" it is, torture is still torture, and equally as vile) resist, and when they do face a genuine threat they somehow manage to pacify it without issue.

To use an example PID Caitlyn managed to single-handedly kill (the original text said "defeated", but we all know what he meant by that) Teddibear, the flagship of Impuro's army, with (presumably) 0 prior combat experience. And how does the greater cult react? They just impurify her, just like that, no big fight, just that.

I know you might say that their general incompetence that I pointed out earlier counts as a flaw, thus declassifying them as Mary Sues. But, saying that would make you a fool, because their incompetence needs to actually mean something, it needs to get in their way. And, as you can guess, it doesn't.

You know those wojak memes where someone is reading smut "for the plot". Well, I'm being genuine when I say I got interested in the Gremlin-verse for the plot, the porn was set-dressing to me. "A grimy, industrialist, almost Orwellian dystopia ran by a senile elder god? What isn't there to love," I thought, oblivious that this was going to be the most confusing 1-4 months of my life.

I'm still sticking around though, hopefully it will get better. Hopefully...

(Probably going to get dislike-bombed for this. But oh well, shit happens.

Err, no. The demo is just the custom night. Go check out the... subscription, if you want a little more. (I hate subscription services, so I can't speak on what that's like.) 

Oh, I'll go check when the next update is. Just let me get my time machine handy...

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But that's the boring answer!

Where's the nonsensical, batshit, and impractical explanations I've come to expect from this universe?!






I'm up-voting. the deadpan response made me laugh.

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I'd normally snark about you patting yourself on the back, but I think the size of your head makes it difficult to reach that far.

Don't take it personally.

Edit: Grammar, I really need to get better at detecting it.

Is that a sad emoticon with a unibrow?

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What's got him so glum? Bet he couldn't bear with Teddi anymore. Ya know, I think he should be a lot more merry around his colleagues; at least he's not being a brat about it. Does he hop when he's mad, or does he start getting catty and call people names?

If I were to be honest, he looks kind of creepy. Should I call security?

Edit: grammar

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Short answer: Suck it up.

Long answer: It's a horror game, there probably won't be an option for that

Edit: Grammar

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Oh yeah, in my case I just show them my Warhammer collection, it's an instant turn-off for them; they get so disappointed at how pathetic I am that they instantly turn around and leave the office!

Edit: It even works in real life!

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Well, that is quite the question

All LoveDolls (blue mice, purple bears, and humans in suits not withstanding) are around the same height of around 11-12 feet tall. Jerri is roughly 6-foot. Teddibear is marginally taller than the rest standing at about 13-15 feet tall (around the same height as a Rogal Dorn heavy tank, just in case the Imperium finally listens to my radio calls and squishes Impuro). And as for Creepi... It's complicated, one thing you'd learn fairly quickly when actually analyzing the Gremlin-verse is how nothing makes sense and that only consistent thing is its inconsistency. In one image I tried using Caitlyn as a base-average height for the Impurified, but in another image she's shorter. I'm single-handedly keeping Tylenol in business with how many headaches this caused me.

ANYWAYS! As for their weight, it's a lot more simple to calculate, Jerri ways the same as the average adult man (190 lbs), as for Teddi-n-the bunch, I decided to go with the rather conservative estimate of 1000+ lbs (notice how Teddi is twice Jerri's height yet her weight is more than twice? That's because of something something, square cube law. Realistically, everyone except for Jerri would collapse under their own weight and would be entirely immobile for long periods of time. If you ever get in a fight with Teddibear, just poke her in the legs with a stick and she'll be stuck on the floor for the next 3-5 hours.)

How did I get these numbers? Math, lots of math. I'm one of those weirdos who likes math. DON'T JUDGE ME!

As for the second question, I must say that LoveDolls/Cryptids/Impure Creatures/Hood-Gals are a mix of all three, paranormal, technological, and biological. All four types are made entirely of Impuro's energy, an inherently paranormal substance that I suspect requires nutrients to survive like human cells (In one image Bratti can be seen eating a popsicle, indirectly implying that they need sustenance, like food and water, to survive. Not to mention (as you said earlier) they can drool, adding to the idea that they have a digestive system. Impure Creatures specifically digest sperm for nutrients (sperm barely has any, by the way. Might I suggest blood? For efficiency's sake?) in order to reproduce asexually (They bud off a parent, by a textbook definition, they reproduce asexually). The Technological claim might be a bit of reach, even by my standards, but hear me out. Security has a light-bulb on the top of her large forehead, and, in a singular image, it lights up when exited. This implies that Impure energy is able to both interface with technology, and transmit/receive electrical signals like a human neuron, albeit heavily amplified to allow for enough voltage to power the bulb in the first place.

Decided to split this up into a separate paragraphs, here is when I enter my mad-scientist arc.

Technically, with Impure energy being technological, this means someone, anyone, can purchase a doll only to experiment on them for the greater good. I could throw one into a blender, and then turn the stringy fibers that come out of it into thread, then weave that thread to form a new, better electrical system, a system cheaper than copper, a system that can withstand higher voltages without blowing up. What if I go further, as every good dictator knows, the moment something new pops up, the first thing you have to do is weaponize it. I could kidnap one singular Impure creature and then place them in a cage, sacrifice someone to it and now I have two creatures. I then take the "child" and give it a controlled shock to wipe it clean. Since the LoveDoll manufacturing process involves imprinting a new personality, likes, and dislikes onto a fresh canvas, I say we copy that, imprint our own programming onto our new war-bots, a programming severed from Impuro's grasp, a programming loyal to the dictator and their republic. Chop off those useless stubs they call "hands" and replace them with new ones, ones capable of gripping a weapon. We cover the thing a new metallic shell capable of deflecting small arms fire. If your budget is adequate, we can even attach radios to them, allowing them to coordinate strikes, pushes, and retreats at scales previously thought infeasible. Since we only need one creature to create thousands, that means we can have a theoretically infinite armada of war-bots ready to serve under our new empire. From here we can either sell these bots and become rich, or we can use them for ourselves, taking over country after country until Impuro herself is trembling under our imperial might!

Phew! That was a mouthful. I cannot answer on personalities though, I'm bad at analyzing that.

EDIT: Fixed the numbers

EDIT 2: As for your 3rd question... Do you even know what you're talking about? LoveDolls are creations of Impuro, a god responsible for literal fucking genocide, call me doll-ist all you want, but I think there isn't a singular wholesome bone in their body.

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I can't answer any of these, but I can muse on the first question.

It's because there are only 2 women in Glacier's life, one of those is his mother. (That was a joke)

The more likely reason is that he asked other people, but they refused, and for fairly obvious reasons. (How would you explain to your employer that your first major voice-acting gig was for a lewd FNaF clone?)

EDIT: Grammar

(In a Victorian accent)

Ah, yes, we must refrain from using such... vulgarities in our vocabulary, lest we frighten the locals with our indecent language.

Perish the thought...

The publisher said that it's due to ClickTeam and most anti-virus software creating false positives.

Question: When Jerri gets implemented will he be an ally to the player? From a motivation prospective it makes sense, due to both parties (Jerri and the player) wanting to survive the night.