itch.io

All it is, is for real life, just be careful about usage of substances that lead to behavioral changes, just because we deserve the freedom, doesn't mean we can simply ignore the consequences.  Too much and it becomes hard for one to recognize others and others to recognize them as people with feelings.  The alterations kept long enough cause walls to put up that can lead to misjudgments (Overdose/Intoxication/Addiction).  Even for me to have been on something as simple as anti depressants, while small, kept me from feeling sad at times I should have been.  It all ends up being double edged if we don't have others to call us out on the changes, good or bad.  There are more examples I could give, but that starts to end real rocky butt hurt territory.  Things like this keep us from being able to realize how we are making others feel if we end up making our feelings matter more than others.  Freedom and moderation to share compared to addiction and anarchy to hoard.  A matter of knowing what goes too far as to use freedom as a means to oppress or silence others for trying to voice their concerns, and then there are the yes people who will agree just to make themselves look good.  Your game doesn't go into detail on these, nor should it, but it hints at it in places, because it doesn't go overboard.  Issue many have with me is because I like to think about issues, and it gets exhausting running into people who think only their opinion matters.  I don't expect anyone to follow, but neither do I want to drag this out.

Its been awhile since I've played, spent a good day checking out everything old and new.  Like the additions added to old content, and the new ones are fun too.  Your updates may be small, but they are quality, and you a good job of addressing bugs.  There may be some text or talks that go over subjects I don't entirely agree with or understand, but I know, like me, there are reasons that have lead to your thoughts being as they are.

Less handsome (sculpted look), more cute (softer look), more expressive.  While I liked the first ones a lot, these seem just as good!

What I think I see:

Right from the start both a feeling of underappreciation and over exaggeration (the character's thoughts).  Followed by a feeling of overreliance on technology for even simple pleasures or simple activities, while a lack of proper communication to be able to figure out what selfless thing to do that would best give the other real joy.  At he start here they feel here together in the moment, but it fees like they do not fully understand each other.  Still the story has just begun so this thought may not hold.

For life to operate without a hitch, we would need to be all regarded as mindless machines.  A family unit is something normal, a mere sub construct of larger whole, ad a complex machine, nay even an AI is no different, for there is grander and simple AIs, no different than complex and simple organisms.  Unity and unwavering loyalty are two different things,  and so too is how the way in which both can be approached, though open honesty or through fear and aggression.  Building trust in an established system is the key to keeping the system from faltering, but throw a wrench in something operating smoothly and it could grind to a halt or even implode...

Crime and Crime Prevention, this first question/statement here I can agree with, one person does not get o dictate the actions of the whole.  At the same time though their concerns can't be completely ignored either.  Once friction is made, there must be a way to settle it without giving too much power to any involved.  This very concept is something I often struggle and debate myself on.  How does the question and answer shift though when the issue is no longer perceived as a one on one issue, but he feelings turn towards an entire group?  and then still if it spreads further from not being held in check and amended?  This is though where you gets crimes that arise from those who have fallen through the cracks in the system, discarded, forgotten, or ignored.  Their pleas turn towards anger, sometimes without a proper target...

To me it is not enough to simply have a question and an answer, but to go beyond.  How does the answer change when you change how the question is worded?  How does the question changed based on the answer given?  If you can adapt your thinking before an incident occurs, you can also adapt how to solve it too.  A true open mind is one free enough to acknowledge even that which would be deemed improbable.  This includes the ability to think and feel as another does, for in knowing them, means knowing how to deal with them.

Struggle is indeed a constant, but he key to happiness is to minimize it, and keep struggles to simple and natural things, without it ever escalating to some form of violence or warfare.  Justice in this sense would be the de-escalation of issues, but also putting them on case by case basis to rest, by addressing the thoughts, feelings, and concerns of those involved, and having them exchange their views.  Only by understanding each other can we help to minimize conflict, jealousy, and judgmen.  It all about using our words, and following it up with our actions, to build that trust and belief that we are not the monsters we may see each other as.  Come together, not drive apart.

To make sure I am thinking of this properly, it would be immoral to call a rock stupid, for it does not posses any form of though to begin with?  Makes sense to me if that is so!  For you do not know how the rock itself feels or doesn't feel.  That is part why I phrase things as my thought, opinion, or belief, and not fact, even if I may be convinced in something being fact.  It implies there is room for doubt or that there is something to the subject I may be missing.  It is never too late learn new things, but a lot of what I see missing for real is lack of the ability to think abstractly and look at the bigger picture, requiring oneself to consider themselves an individual not part of anything first to reach such a level of thinking.  I myself have always seen myself as a puzzle piece that could be placed anywhere, yet never fit how it is supposed to.

A construct can only have moral attributes when the vast majority can agree on them.  It does not mean that the dissenters or outliers stand to be treated as outcast though, for there is a difference between subtle changes to logic and complete opposition.  Even then this could be only corns in one respective view.  The key to stopping spread is to treat this difference with understanding, for even in disagreement can we still get along.  Hostility only ever puts up a wall, and when there is a wall, one goes around it if they cannot go through it.

Respect, Responsibility, Kindness, these are the values I see to a healthy society, both of individual and interpersonal, from those up high to those down low, value each other equally regardless of station, as if to render them non existent differences.  Give and give back.  Walker seem to have walked out on one of them... oh dear...

(This is an issue that can be corrected at any other point in time, but right now all the sprites are still, if not for the detailed descriptions written it would be hard to know just how they are feeling or expressing themselves, but with writing quality I find it hard to honestly / properly complain)

A gang huh? With that name? at such a place? all quite apt references

Negativity and stress are a direct or indirect result of neglect of the aforementioned three values.  They do though go beyond the individual, for they can all be considered a chain or domino effect, as the burden gets thrust upon one tot he next...  for when something you take for granted is taken away form you, the very floor has been removed from your feet... a feeling I have felt myself many times, a mix of my own fault, and from so many others out there, a mix of their own fault... clarity and true appreciation sometimes only come from hitting rock bottom, and I've lost track of how many times I have alone, even if only emotionally.  The fact that I care and give a damn to be concerned is what drags me down time and again, but even as I lose myself, I must find myself, and that is why no matter how low I sink myself, I rise to surface, as in tandem with wanting to kill myself, I can't do it, as in wanting to greatly harm others, I can't do it, my core holds me back, knowing there must be a better way, for if I continue to exist there must be reason to exist.  I cannot either let others exist in vain, and that is why it pains me to see them waste their efforts in trying to force change on others, change has been made many times without the need for force to be involved.

Walker may very well embody my hopes, dreams, and aspirations not realized, crushed under waves of "me firsts", and so too may his faults.  My furname is Saru/Sarun, purely by accident, the intent of combining two gemstones, fire and water/ice, little did I know those are actual words/names, monkey / god , for I am very playful, but also very serious.  To me if we cannot address the issues that drag us down, no one will ever truly able to be happy, so long as it remains a contest of wills in direct opposition.  My desire is tone down extremes by working with what we have already to form learning, information, and understanding of that which is unknown to us.  Make the unknown know and it will no longer be so scary.  I am no god however, but the very meanings of the name Sarun area surprise to me for they are the very ideals I have always sought.  I do not seek my happiness, not without seeking the happiness of others.  I wish to prop myself up slowly, and not step on others to get to the top, I value the immaterial over the material, selflessness over selfishness.  In all cases I am but one alone, and alone one cannot take on the world.  That is why my sona too despite have such powers, is also given faults, most notably of being on the inside no different than any other, and a world populated by threats scaled to match that power.  Everything must be in balance lest he scales tip over, such is the responsibility of having power.

Lack of clarity and resentment from higher ups for not following their line of thinking?  Sowing discord in their own ranks when they are supposed to be the ones to promote order?  If this is what is going on, this is the tip of the iceberg to shatter the whole berg itself!  Lack of any of the three aforementioned values in either way, can cause the lack to grow, and course domino effect, unless one is to halt the next tile from falling.  It works both ways, and to erode one end is to erode the other.  We aren't perfect, but there is a reason we should sperate personal and professional feelings.

The key to avoiding detection is to hide in plain sight, but also to avoid measures other than sight.  When an anomaly is detected, that is when it is investigated.

When on professional duty, do not let the emotions of anyone not directly, there, involved cloud your judgment, and so aside from that take everything seriously to job description.  Seeking to impress hardly works when it is done intentionally, impression comes form actions not intended for seeking approval.  If one member performs poorly, so too shall his team suffer...  partners is term of two or more being considered one, so you rise or fall because of each other.  Back to blue, again thoughts in mission are being to preoccupied by thoughts of things outside of mission, lack of clarity impacts performance, something already in no good state of mind for, heightening the further spike downwards.  Situations could be quantified as having exact values, while emotions can quantified as being multipliers, but with each category can be given both positive and negative values, as the right situation or mood, could easily flip things on their head.  And once again manipulating emotions and actions through forethought and withholding of information,  you can't play chess without getting your pieces knocked off the board...

Tech like that... designed to simply disarm and immobilize, rather than use brute lethal force... this is what law enforcement should be about, not law executioners.  Still depending on the circumstances, the switch from non lethal and lethal could be necessary.  You work with the information you are provided.  If the respective information of the two sides does not match up, that is where the true crimes begin, because neither is on the same page and both are jumping to sperate, even if related conclusions, all born of a lack of understanding on both ends.  Forcefield/energy barrier?  My sona at best can use a wind barrier (heavily concentrated/constrictive airflow), quick to regenerate with mental focus, but rapid AND strong impacts are needed to break through, among modern implements, a sniper or LMG would be needed, but also must be able to land a hit.  Correlation to real life is that is unless you can beat the opposition senseless, they will come back form it, but only so long as they remain your enemy, will they come back in new ways against you.  A spat, a skirmish, a war, all the same thing but at differing magnitudes.

Yes... it is very important to know when you need to control your emotions... lack of it leads to chaotic outbursts, and since mental focus and control is the pillar to proper usage for even my sona, one misstep (if was in Walker's place) could yield at worst the entire building being disintegrated, but not living matter directly, since again no god, however interesting results would be a drastic improvement to external hygiene of all within the building, from removal of dead matter!  (The bonds that made it leaving are weakened so their breakdown is then pushed to the finish).

Oh for the love of... this why we need to have candid conversations more..., and stop hiding things...

Interesting and indeed how you phrase or term something changes how it feels as well as show how you feel about the given subject.  Ah.. the conflict of a unknown in the middle of an established system, both have (separate) reasons to fear each other, because neither knows how the other will treat them... this is why education and understanding are important, to hear each other out.  Is it Archer's fault really though? Or is it something neither party is seeing or is aware of?  One system does nor fit all, but even a system can learn to adapt to both ways of old and new, for each of its members.  When promises are made, they must be followed by equal actions, those actions must be witnessed first hand in order to wipe away all doubt and fear.  It also requires though to listen to the needs, not wants, not demands, of the people.  What is something they all hold in equal value and regard, that can't be challenged for it is something they need too?

It is interesting how words and intentions can be misconstrued and manipulated.  This why I always wish to seek the source, for telephone (yes a word of mouth game) proves unreliable.  Interesting also how one can meddle in the affairs of another to both break things and / or repair them.

Respect, Responsibility, and Kindness, the key points, which give rise to Trust and Generosity.  Once again a display of how they are employed and used by Red and with him.  Dissolve the notions of status and of labels, by employing the one label that fits all, we all living beings, and the only to continue to live is to help each other live.  Remove the notions of predator and prey, and instead join hands.

There is something to be said about dying for a cause you believe in, but you need to know exactly why you are fighting!  However to commit suicide, even in the name of said cause, stands to stifle the flow of information that could grind the conflict(s) to a halt.  Suicide, no matter the reasons, always amounts to act of cowardice and selfness, and shuns oneself from themselves.  Perhaps this is why I could never do it, because to end my struggles, is to end my efforts to end anyone else's struggles.

When in any form of dystopia, always be mindful that peaceful moments can be interrupted at anytime!  No matter whose side you are on, innocent or guilty, once again the floor can be ripped out from under you, for no reason at all even.  In the end though when it comes to making snap decisions, instinct overrides all logic, and the actions may therefore be irrational.  Such too is the feelings of one who cornered, and so too leads to mindless outbursts devoid of thought or care for oneself.

Treating negativity with further negativity helps no one....... , instead of judgement, ask questions to open things up!!!

It indeed is important having a stable society, but justice can many forms and definitions form one individual to the next.  This makes justice therefore way too subjective and meaningless when it cannot have a universal agreement.  You need an abstract concept that has more ridged interpretations, with little variance in how they can be perceived.  Hrm... when you make plans, but circumstances change, the best thing sometimes is change the plans to fit the circumstances.  Make the best of the situation(s).  Wish I could put it into practice sigh

Suspicious activity is much easier to notice the more often and more concentrated it happens.  By keeping it interspersed, infrequent, and scattered, the pattern becomes unrecognizable.  When I think it from the stand point of a machine the threat isn't even a blip.  It is because of that very reason, when you flip it around, that you have so many people falling through the cracks of the systems too.  Once there is too much concentrated in one area of some kind of malice, it with explodes and erupts, because too many have been neglected for too long, for no one notices the signs.   Abuse of power leads to rebellion and rebellion leads to abuse of power.  When two opposing sides of equal extremes overpower each other, anarchy and complete chaos.  All because the ones caught in the middle are the one who get hurt the most...  Once again prevention is key, and eliminate favoritism is to only aid in needs, not wants to desires, do not blindly give out handouts, only give them what hey need to live in order to accomplish those wants and desires on their own.  If you want something you have to earn it, it will not just be given to you.  In turn though the three values I mention apply, when you have overabundance, do not hoard it, and in turn you gain trust of those in need, because now they have hope to do their work for their own future.  Give them opportunities to earn privileges, spoil them in little bits if desired, but on occasion only, and don't flaunt wealth, but don't withhold it either.  From these three values everything follows.  A cycle without large miseries is a cycle to be proud of.  Give and give back.

Having guns is one thing, using them is another, have ammo is yet another, the kind of gun is another, its intent or use is another.  There must be a balance between freedom and regulation.  To much freedom and people will kill each other left and right in their own form of "Justice" completely removed from what could be considered justice.  To much regulation and you start to have smuggling operations, also resulting in people so called "Justice".  In the end if a gun is not in an area designated for its use or purpose for its design, then there should be a way to automatically have it be disabled and unusable (think something like laser tag).  Sadly this is where technology comes into play, but the weapons restriction programs must have a local system (like a watches), that is only activated or adjusted from a joint database server (government owned / regulated), this dual system can be used to limit the guns duration of function for a given period as to eliminate misuse, while still giving freedom to allow it to be used.  A system that has both a solid foundation and flexibility.  By a coordination between the individual and the whole a form of unity linked to those two can be achieved, so long as nether is mindless and both are aware, of the rights, rules, and responsibilities they are charged with.

Very interesting, but it does not condone the random usage of such a firearm, when not used in an designated area, ANYTHING can happen once the shot is fired!

That is what I hate the most, is being played around with when dealing with a serious situation, when the situation is serious I have no time time for games, I only have time for facts and cutting to the heart of the matter, find the root, solve the problems from their source.  You can't just paint a date like emotions are a machine algorithm! Gah!  This is why sometimes I think of myself as close to a robot as human can be, I think concrete, but I never deny my emotions, and nothing is ever set in stone until it DOES happen!       OOOHH that where he been hiding!  I should have known >/../>

Hrm... this a lot and this is only CASE 01! Hitting the ground running, with a lot to stop and sniff, to think and ponder.  My thoughts may not be quite right or match up with your own, but I am often never far.  Being able to give and receive life lessons is also something I value a lot, something that for the "U"SA since to to be lacking more and more as the years go by.  The division of the country as you mentioned is a possibility that may still come to be.  The major question though becomes how many slices, and what are their sizes and shapes?  Worst case is up to nine divisions, and at minimum three, I feel.

You keep changing things... its annoying... but its for GOOD reasons!

Wish even here you had made more dev logs just to let it be known here too what you were/been up to!

The first spites were rather flat, the second sprites were two dimensional, so now given them sprites to have full body language including turning the sides for more than just their heads, each is quite a leap on its own!

Glad to have default name option, is also feel like it fits in with the equal range of names of the others. (Each name seems to fit who they are, and its never about what they are)

To panic is normal, but don't look a gift bear in the mouth!

Thump... Thump! <3

After breaking the ice like that it would be rude to ignore him.  Its all lies in how you choose to deal with a situation, the most important is establish a form of comfort and safety to restore rationality.  Maple... I wonder where that one will lead... >/../>

This is why I do enjoy what writing you have, you know comedy, heartfelt comedy.  Awkward comedy too!  They are what I like the most!

First person panic, now third person panic!  Its important to establish what it look like from both perspectives!

Hah! XD those aren't even humans!  But in this place everything could be flipped!  Granted a lot of these comics I only know by name, but just by knowing the references, the comedic factor might just blow the barn door off! XD

Unlike Cade Dylan comes off a bit weird strange, but very passionate.  It makes me understand why people may be hesitant with me, even as I am not much different in ways than Dylan.  Its all in knowing what I see, and knowing what others see.  Weird/strange though does not mean bad, just different, and with that conclusion there is no reason to be rude.

Given how I treat my cats with a little too much affection, I'd be cautiously optimistic towards a live furry/beastman, fighting the urge to hug and squeeze!!!

I got to experience what having Covid is like, no amount of warmth can remove the chill and ache in your bones from it... fitting for me in a way since my sona can do that, yet illness still be prone to too! (I'm lucky to take health fairly seriously, let alone have a strong immune system despite having diabetes)

WOAH! THE MAP! its now a small town design instead of the former large village! Everything looks linked instead of spaced out!  May your mole lord be wise! X3

Didn't realize, I mean never seen the dad he had! (Prior to this release)

Shesss new!  They may have BMI, but they have muscle too!... They have muscle too right?...

I'm suspicious of the implications of this former tenant, its all too coinvent!  Fur now the reasons elude!

Interesting that he mentions THOSE animals! hehe!  Eat it, be grateful, but be careful!  Tomato, metallic, almost like blood...  Given possible reasons, best to let him remove the private stuff... I feel guilty for ever knowing the answers, but I'm used to embarrassing myself.  ^^;

If I didn't already know the VN, I would respond with why, even if I think I know the answer.

NOW THAT IS A CG WORTHY OF THSI SCENE!!! I... I... oh gawd.... XD the chaos! but FRIENDLY chaos! XD  Yep.. you totally have restyled everyone to be more fitting with their personality! For better or worse, but in this case respective to the viewers perspective!  Any issues I have with it are of my own and no one else's!  This is how it should be, looking and feeling natural.  An exchange not a clash.

5 you mean 7 now? out of 7 , I think you mean 8 billion??? either way derp... way to go fuzzbutts! jeez too much to wake up to!!!

Same situation but different words used!  I can't keep count of how many times I've the same thing (of a given topic) in different ways! @..@

Based on how things going this time around...   Hyena, Bull, Dog, Rabbit, Cat, all base don how they acted/phrased their questions.... course this also a matter of personal preference too.

Sidney reminds me the most of how I felt in elementary school because of my autism without even understanding it or myself and my own ticks, I just sort of acted, but also that same reason for maturity beyond my years in other situations...  I just can't seem to ever act my age...

Sorry Tyler... I can't cook... (but if I ever do I will gladly change my answer!, it may be a game but I must be truthful!)

Rorik, using his own logics against him, but the fact that uses logic to start with is why I like him!  While I do know some Spanish, it hardly enough for me justifying even low level fluency... sorry Roro... and yes your overprotective demeanor is intimidating...

Ace.. boy you really like to HOP to conclusions eh? eh!? XD  Sorry bro, a bit too laid back at his point in time.. frankly I'm surprised I'm still skinny... nope never had serious relationship either...

No lie to giving Lars more rich flair..., but it went from feeling humble to off putting..., BUT that could be the intention? Least for the first meeting here?  As it seems like such a huge personality shift, must be a reason!  I can't find much fault with it, so could also be a matter of me getting used to it too.  Oh this is rough, while I don't subscribe to any particular religion, I do want to believe there is some sort of higher power, even if removed or detached, but also that there are many things out there that have no easy way to be tangibly seen, so I opt for there there being something in the stars.  Another rough one.. while I do feel uncomfortable, I would respond with such a question too...  Ugg I hate lack of clarity! but its not being serious, it can slide, for its then in fun instead.

(OMG Found the Easter egg! hehehe so cute! BOOP!)

Hrm... 13/14 just couldn't ACE it! ^^;

Biggest change is Lars, that is it, and its one I'm neutral on, don't like it, but have no reason to dislike it.  My overall thoughts compared to any prior release have not changed at all better or worse.  I'd say you are still doing fine!

This VN is filed with happy positive thoughts /spins on even negative things, something that I feel is sorely lacking from a lot of real life these days...  that is because this VN is about HEART, about genuine caring and compassion, that is what I wish for for all.

This is the sad tale of the reality we deny, more so if we are directly involved, where there are two warring side slacked in bitter combat, that even innocents are put into the line of fire...  The ironic part is both sides are so steep and full of themselves that they do not realize they are fighting with the exact same tactics and the wonder why they are deadlocked.  When anger rules without compassion, you are going to push others side blindly in pursuit of something you want to have RIGHT NOW and by FORCE... it really irks me how demands are made, but there is never any work actually put into making progress towards that goal, always trying to blame others when one won't even lift a finger!!!

I have my own issues, but I also acknowledge that I am the true one who can ever break myself out of the fear and apprehension that comes from hearing to horror stories everyone tells...

It never helps  to have in the pursuit of learning or understanding to have anger pointed at you for not understanding it in the first place.  I was not raised among the others, so how dare you lookdown on me for thinking I'm automictically looking down on you?  The sad part is the real bigots are the ones who claim others are doing it without bothering to get to know others.  Using there isms as both a sword and shield, its pathetic, because hiding behind that is also what is keeping you locked in that place, you invite ism when you toss around ism.  Don't judge too quickly or you will only be giving reason to be judged in turn.  Its the golden rule!

If efforts to lean reach an impasse then the lack of understanding turns to anger, hate, and general negativity.  IN effect many of us, myself possibly included, do not understand that we are only perpetuating the cycles, because we are only ever acting in accordance to that cycle... sigh

What happens when you seek to speak to the source to dispel lies and they unfortunately proven truth?  It is the opposite of the story here, but is no less a viable possibility.  The only difference is with whom you meet and associate with first.  It is amazing just how much an impact first impressions can differ first hand than by word of mouth.  You can never know the truth without finding it out yourself, but it also requires you to keep an open mind, but encountering too many with closed minds can just as much shut you out in the opposition side.  If he had met Candids who beat him up ruthlessly, he would have then believed what his mother told him to be the truth more.  Damage and healing are all a matter of who you deal with, the more damage the less can ever hope to be healed and vice versa.  When you in a position of power and have the chance to make difference, do you use it or do you abuse it?

If only I could find people within the various populations out there, who defy the cycle I see, namely by simply being capable of mercy, and willing to exchange our concerns over what we see about our groups, calmly, rationally, then regardless of the mass perception I have, there would be an oasis of someone I could support in their fight alone to make things right, to change the way their whole is perceived, by changing the way they act.  If king and Nelson could do it, then anyone could do it, it all lies in a more peaceful and steadfast solution, something that I am not ever seeing a large scale these days.  Pockets do exist though, but it will take time for those seeds to grow, as compared to those wanting more immediate action.  Nurture good relations and you WILL CHANGE MINDS.

The issue of the upbringing of being in middle class is that I have both, sheltered childhood and some privileges  and  fear of unfamiliarity and denied access to other privileges.  I know humility because I was never treated as having a silver spoon, and being taught that for all I may have there are those with next o nothing, of me I can't bare the thought, but its a problem to big to tackle alone, and for all non profits out there, they help, but only short term, the real solutions are bigger picture, but also because of that it is harder to find a right or proper solution.  Some, but not all, things need to change, most importantly is to provide those with nothing a means to provide themselves with something.  Handouts can much too easily be abused...  If you give a man a fish you feed him for day (could also be said this is the easy and instant gratification route, just tossing money at a problem), if you teach him to fish he can feed himself for the rest of his life (the harder but road to progress route, where you work with people to provide them with the means to provide for themselves).

I am in such a limbo position too, I am able to decide what I want, but at the same time have so many potential options denied from me, just because of a sort of path I was forced to follow, that being the routine nature I followed through my upbringing, it has isolated me form ever being free to of the at framework, and because of that many possibilities too I would shy away from as well.  I am pigeon holed between my beliefs and reality... what I was taught and what is actually expected...

And there it is... one slip up and suddenly everything is treated like it never existed in the first place... this wat extremism can do... even among those who may be friends, suddenly thrust to be enemies because of a SIGNLE MISUNDERSTANDING?  And the feelings that follow, to be able to be angry with oneself, is what separates someone who does care from those that don't.  The willingness to apologize and admit you were wrong, that is what "humanity" is, for it is not a territorial dispute, it is merely a gap in understanding.

No one can know my pain, if they cannot understand the pain they inflict, it stands to be just as true if there were to any who I have ever truly wronged, and I find that at few, but that is only ever because I am not some social butterfly, and hardly go out, but I observe, and oh boy do I observe! sigh

I too do feel like crying at times, but I am not goign to go to my parents about it ever, for it is as much because of them that I am in my miserable state of limbo, for with them having any involvement from them is like handing over ALL control to them, I get no say.  That is part of why I have a high dislike for what I perceive as extremist, for all they ever do is shove others around.

And here in this moment between them is the duality I struggle with.  No matter how much I hate and resent, I can never stop questioning myself about just how far should I really go for in return?  I have the imagination of countless scenarios, all made plausible in some form because it has been proven just how stupid people can be.  But I am a thinker, a planner, an organizer, it all really comes in form of flowcharts, any actual operation needs a real leader with the know how to execute it.  In the end... the best worst result would be what course of action would result in the most equal chances among everyone for indirectly related casualties?  My imagination for anything good or bad is always to be the catalyst, but never to have a direct involvement. All I'd ever wish to do is apply my own spark.  My spark to make other think and ponder for themselves, to think about things in way that is beyond their own little world.

There is also this too..., the feeling that there are actual differences out there I could be making, but I don't know how or where to start, because I'm just as afraid of doing more harm than good.  How is one supposed to live when it feels like dealing with other people is like walking on broken glass???  What purpose do I have if my purpose is being denied and shunned?  I may not be responsible for the actions of those who came before me, but I am forced against my will to shoulder some of that burden, and there is guilt in the damage that has been and keeps being wrought, in ongoing civil cold war...

Sad part is for these reason why I feel like I could never properly love someone not of my own ethnic group, for fear of slipping up when always in their constant presence...  I feel guilty simply at the thought...

And that is the struggle of the sort of person I want o be, to be able to protect others, INCLUDES being able to protect them from THEMSEVLES...

Hrm... too many sweets and this boi will get extras softness! hehe ^^;

Darn to bad couldn't see this even more massive candid..., and this troublesome one...

What utter chaos it is, when both groups view each other as hostile backstabbers? Do you even realize you have backstabbers among your own kind?  You aren't any more clean sir!!! This what it means to have the cycle of violence at its peak, where it is hardest to get away from...

I couldn't handle being responsible for something so horrid, which is why my involvement would have to be indirect, it must be that it was not my choice and it must be that I was not present or even aware of it.

Tell the truth, and nothing but the truth, even if it only your own way of seeing things.  Lay it all out, and you shall find whom you can then truly trust in.  Even so though... the only lies anyone is willing to believe is lies backed by evidence, and so often it is to provoke fear and mistrust, truly horrid manipulation, but depending on the circumstances... it may be an unfortunate necessity.

To plead for mercy over guilt you have over something beyond your control, that is the mark of Humanity, to bear the burdens willingly.  We all have choices, and this includes the choice to give up our choices, but it never means we should act blindly.  Following through with threats is true naivety, when communication is all that actually needed.  It is the difference between mob mentality and humility.  The difference between lashing out and reigning in impulses.

Shakespeare Shakespeare, why do we the masses as a whole, forsake you? Why do we give into misguided anger?  Why do we not value thoughts and feelings?

The price we pay when both sides act upon a lack of knowledge or understanding, harsh/brash actions and reactions.  This is what shows the cracks of a failing system, but you also cannot replace a faulty system with another faulty one.  What I morn the most is our loss for the value and meaning of the intangible, what I morn most is the loss of innocence at the hands of each other, as we slip into a cesspool of sin and depravity by locking ourselves in our own worlds...

And again the conflicted feelings of knowing that my life is partly held together by misery that is force by others on others, the baseline workers, but also not knowing rightly what o do to ever help... a state of limbo and inaction, since a single step could upset everything...

And sadly here is the foremost mark of what I have continually observed about he trans community and them alone, any other communities are only as much as half this way... they will demonize and victimize anyone they see fit under the guise that they are the victim, and then will keep heaping it on by turning on anyone, friend or foe, who dares to defy them! Disagree with them at your peril!  This alone is the reason I hate them.  It has nothing to deal with them themselves, it their behavior and mentality to treat everything like they are entitled and only their inion matters.  This is what it means to rule by tyranny and fear... hell you step out line and not only do they cast you aside into a ditch, they will sling death threats that make Voldemort look like a being of mercy!  Like I have said, gang/mob mentality, always seeking the easy way out, not the right way out, and doing things by force under threat and duress.  Not right, not fair, that it won't matter who you are or your age, if it makes them feel superior they will do it.  Until I can start to be shown otherwise and for them to stop being so full of themselves, I cannot shake this perception, that they themselves have built up, yet try to deny, and in their efforts to deny only cement it in place.  I think the term is Manifest Destiny???  What saddens and sickens me most is the perpetual state of continual rotations of the victims and the victimized, nothing but fighting and bickering, rather than any ounce of rational thought.  What happens when one is is the victim of oppression of a larger ongoing feud(s)?  Those tainted only ever end up tainting others, and it spreads like a disease, because the root causes are never addressed... we are only ever seeing and dealing with the symptoms...

What I miss the most... oddly enough and only just because, the sense of community I had from being in school, where we all had a joint reason/purpose and could all help each other towards that goal.  Just because I am a bit of a lone wolf, but that does not mean I want to be alone, all it means is I want to be myself among others.  I am in many ways but a mirror of what is and is not seen and what is embraced and what is discarded and ignored, but in the end I only know what I know and only act based on what I know... you teach me happiness, I will give happiness, you teach me anger, I will give anger, I believe in the golden rule to the absolute, but the golden rule only applies to the surface, true progress is to dig deep down as to why such feelings are being generated!  Get to the heart of the matter!

Freedom and control are opposing things, yet too much of either and you have oppression, since complete freedom means the ability to exert your own control (anarchy), and the to have to much control breeds unrest as there is a desire for freedom rises.  It is funny how two opposing extremes or catalysts can in the end produce similar results.  I though wish to look inwards, for if we cannot solve our own problems then we cannot solve others problems.  It is true that life is about give and take, but you need to always be aware of what is being given and what is being taken.  Not everything needs to be transactional, but everything should be genuine, and any ulterior motives should be means to further help other others.  Build upon what you know and what you have, yet rather than fight learn how to adapt and incorporate and get along.  All about filing down those jagged edges!

Ooohhh! More than just wuffies! :D  Wuffies fav, but this good to have too! ^^ Ah figures he is THAT guy!  Never knock on wood! :/  It always rings hollow!

Hrm... Logic and reasoning, if dealing with reasonable people, would dictate something like... that money is to be exchanged for safe passage, a very hefty price to waylay such festered anger, but if terms are met, and passage is guaranteed, then this something no one will or could ever forget, and that itself would be a catalyst for change, for it would defy the very cycle, create a break and a crack, that can exploited to start undoing the loop.  As the loop unravels the hold Boss has too will to, since he is ones who keeps the cycle going from the Candid side.  Once again ugg respect through fear is not respect at all, it just veiled hatred!

If others cannot be happy, I cannot be happy.  This is where you take the golden rule a step further.  ITs meaning is One on One, a comparison of two opposing forces, but if you take a step back it too can mean to feel for others, it can also mean to take it into reverse.  You can get what is known as sympathy and empathy, all revolving around taking into account not only how others feel, but how you make them feel!  Look before you leap!  That though is easier when you are not presently embroiled in conflict...

Threats of death, violence, cruelty.. when I see this form someone and see it repeatedly, I can only ever see them as but a beast, incapable of being human for an instant, always being high off the power they control, completely irrational...  Many an issue such as this though can go both ways... when I say I have issues with certain groups, this is exactly what I mean, they never listen and do as they please, because they enjoy ruining the lives of others.  Then it may very well become that not only am I goign to ruin your life in return I'm forced to ruin everyone else connected.  This what happens when there is no one to not only stop conflict, but correct it to.  What happen when you have adults acting like spoiled children.  As much as I have want for revenge, I shiver from not knowing just how far I want or am willing to go.  You back me into a corner, you give me no choice!!! For now you have dozens upon dozens of others who can hardly be viewed as innocent, when they have born witness yet do NOTHING to amend things.  And sadly there you have guilty by association, which is plague of its own as the pain rather than in a single direction is rather released into a wave!...  and then you have ripple effects...

Boss... this what happens to those who betray anyone who only out for themselves, they value nothing and no one, a bully, a tyrant, this the sickening thing that is everywhere these days, always overshadowing what pockets I tend to see as light amidst the dark.  They have power only because others give or allow them to have power.  This is what makes ME angry!!!  I do argue too, but I'd rather express how I feel, than to shove words in the mouth of another!!!

And more or less this how Ghegnis Khan died after being denied the largest prize he could attempt to take, in a most humiliating way... because he did not think of his needs, only his wants...

The ability to give mercy is important, but mercy cannot be given to someone who shows or gives none, if I ever truly wished to harm someone, it would be these kinds...

This is the emotional pain I feel, form the pain we each inflict on others, and when the pain gets to be too much at various thresholds, we lose part of ourselves or faith and trust in others, even if they have given us no reason to distrust hem... everything just starts to feel fake... we are left with no confidence in ourselves or others, such is the pain of such a profound loss, and with it our very sanity is drained with our soul...

Sigh Can't save everyone, but hat is exactly why I try to be the voice of reason, why I ask questions, why I go beyond to ask questions of questions... Can't help someone who can't be bothered to help themselves... but this also means my problem is that I care more about others than myself.

The saddest thing is life is when it takes a martyr to show the err in ones ways...  and that no good deed goes unpunished, when weighed against the sins of the many...

While not everything is prefect, this what I'd call an ideal or realistic ending... they shares scars but are still alive, and where there is life, there is hope!  If my trust and generosity were not broken for aforementioned reasons, this is something I'd willingly support.  Heck could think of his VN as only the first Story or Book, since things have only changed for them alone!  You never just how much you glean from so little, for never underestimate the profound impact small gestures can make!

Log Start from Here:

Even among reality I do believe we are drifting further apart as population and diversity rise, as well as technology, it makes it easier both to be connected form a distance, instead of in person, as it does to cut any form of communication and means to understand.  A purist of unity turned discord, when responsibility and proper handling is no longer being taught.  Free will is important, but it is no more than a chaotic mess of conflicting information when core values of proven frameworks are discarded.  And beneath the weight of it all things break and we are swept in the deluge.  I cannot exempt myself even as I sit here to relay this.  My life has largely been alone and isolated, yet it also my window to the world, and what I tend to see is various joys isolated, least from me, and my perception, by those who would get in the way just to amuse themselves, a sense of fear to ever venture from what I know and trust.  Practice and preach mean nothing if we cannot make our words and actions line up, and these days more often than not we betray ourselves... we cannot demand and just expect things to change, we need to make the change, slowly, surely, and gradually.  Dynamic sudden shifts are what creates mass turmoil in the first place...

Ambition alone is what kills access to the bigger picture, which would involve the other three.  The other three can be more easily shared, but by ambition the approaches may differ and clash...

The gnawing and numbing feeling of ice and snow blanketing and burying everything, with true indiscrimination, covering up all triumphs and failures...  there is no death quite like of cryogenic for it always leaves something behind...

A database to keep track of world building for the reader, the longer your VN the more valuable this is indeed!!!

The entry there at this time of this line of mine... Use the foundations of old that stands the test of time to stay true, then incorporate that which is new as your base...  You can only ever invent something once, but you get to innovate it numerous times... in the end though it should still have a clear, and not jumpy path to its origin.  Something without a proper foundation is never going to gain proper traction, as in turn others will also dig in to resist... to clash is halt progress for both sides... since to break the foundation to let the chaos lose.  There must be a balance between the solid and the liquid... that what make living beings possible, we have a frame, but are flexible, but are not amorphic, we can only adapt so quickly, too much change and something is going to go wrong... but also without internal maintenance either, even of each other, small cracks with start to form from the inside too...

Issues issues... don't keep it all inside, talk things out, don't just say what is the issue, don't just say your concerns about it even, go further to say why..., and even in disagreement, better to leave minimal room for doubt, for doubt is what makes you falter when your are needed most! Doubt is the negative that gives rise to all others, fear, anger, spite, sadness, in the end they paralyze you, and shut you out or off in their own ways.  Furthermore to have multiple at once, might as well be having a stroke, as you now stand to wrestle with oneself to even recognize who you are and question your sanity as an internal conflict rages on with any victory being a loss (impulses) until things can be quieted down.

Learning to let go of things is very important thing to be able to do... grudges only stands to weigh you down... sometimes to learn requires you end up making grudges, but true progress is when you are able to move past them, for BOTH sides!!!

To always be treated as something, also causes one to act more like something.  To rise above it is to show both what hey are actually doing to each other.  In the end communication to build understanding is key, everything is a two way street, even if one seeks to block one path.  BREAK THE CYCLE and you remove the shackles of deadlock!!! I alone am only one individual, and so I alone cannot make an impact, but that also means the reverse is true, I alone cannot stand to learn new wisdom either, there is groups for a reason, but don't abuse those reasons either!!!

In the end forcing things to come to an ultimatum and even more by a Catch 22 is the WORST POSSIBLE.  This is why issues need to get address sooner than later, and not shoved to the side and ignored!  That requires full attention to what one has to say and full attentiveness to listen!!!  Even those who have marked each other for enemies may have something they don't even realize about themselves or others!  Does anyone ever truly know everything about themselves?  As much as anyone is for that matter?  Open mindedness is about considering what you don't know as much as what you do know!

Kitty! :D Derp calling him fat, yet al I see is beefcake!  Maybe just butt?

Insert here with new insert of LOOM, in response and in connection to...:  What separates "Man" from "Beast"?  Logic, Reason, Deduction, are but a few possible answers.  Also though what separates "Beasts" from "Plants"?  Based on what we are able to observe, awareness and conscious ability for thought.  Lower organisms, to the best of our ability to discern, operate by pure instinct and base function, unable to comprehend or embrace feelings, let alone their own.  This right is KEY part to my argument of how our humanity in reality is slowly slipping.  A lack of "humanity" or the ability to care and show concern, let alone be allowed to show concern even in the first place.  To ignore or hush voices of others, for as much as our struggles can be because of others, so too can we be the very reason of our own struggles, we may not realize it until too late.  Acts of violence and aggression are what could be called small slips, widespread violence or war is when you have a critical system failure.  In either case enough small ones turn into big ones, and once wounds are inflicted them may never quite heal proper and thus fester (and cause a cycle), so the better course of action is to prevent escalation AND to mend the breaks.  Otherwise all your left with is burned bridges or even scorched earth, then NO ONE is happy or smiling..., and if someone is after that, then you know where the true culprit lies, for those who never see issue with their actions or ever feel conflicted, are ones who have little ability to change, that lack of ability to change means they are far more relying on instinct than logic.  This train of thought though could still be seen as two ways unfortunately... and it turns into a game of chicken/hot potato...

My autism is my double edged sword in many ways, in many respects I always stand to have one of two respective qualities needed for any given situation, but always lack the other.  Here in tune with time this is the very mental focus I ascribe to my sona having, my sona being the embodiment of both my ideals and multifacetedness, peaked to a point sharp enough to pierce any obstacle no matter its form..., though even still even in greatness there is always a means of fault... for with great knowledge and wisdom there always remains a means to be vulnerable on the inside, it need not be physically...  and to lose focus of that sharp point when in use is to invite disaster in a range of falloff equally opposite of the feat tryignto be accomplished...  In simpler terms, what happens when matter collider misses its mark?, but then drive that upwards to multiples of 10 to the x colliders faulting, the process is incomplete and everything is left unstable, a sudden warping chain reaction we couldn't even start to imagine could happen, nukes being only the tip of the iceberg.  When one loses focus of that which is important, that is when their reality and sanity start to suffer, and as those suffer so the does the ability to be "Human", the process is not irreversible, but the further gone the harder and longer recovery is...

(Where as the MC here has an ability to ghost through time to interlace with the present, my sona has the ability of matter manipulation (as highest for of power through combination of basic powers) (some expectations apply, namely cannot manipulate something living, as in cannot interfere directly), both can be seen as god like talents, but both not being gods can suffer harsh consequences should they misstep too gravely!!!) (my sona alone would have the ability to repair all the damage done to this world, but as great or demi god as may be, is but one alone and would take many years to heal an entire world, as compared to many months of something like (localized) nuclear fallout)

Ah now here is a lesson I both know and yet cannot mange to employ...  at any given moment my thoughts waver from looking to the concrete that is the past, actions committed, to the future, the chaos of possible actions, and the present as a means to act by drawing on them... for all my clarity I may have at times, I never have clarity in the moment.  My discipline lies where there is no emotion, but my humanity lies in my ability to give emotion... to find truth is not to listen to anything that has nothing to deal with the matter at hand, to vet out lies is to listen to how much that does not meet that initial query rings true... it is not easy, but it yet again is framework of a solid foundation, that is allowed to to change part of itself that is built off of it.

If something isn't broken, there is no need to fix it.  If something is broken, fixing it is but one option, repurposing it as you mention is another.  This here is inline with my idea of combining old and new, yet again as you mentioned.  A key to progress is to use both mind/logic with heart/feelings/emotion.  The logic of emotion and the emotion of logic, to be able to respect each in respect to each other is perhaps the key to bringing inner peace.

Making assumptions is normal, but by logic is to assume you may be wrong, that is then where observation comes into play.  The more times you observe the same patterns taking place, the more inclined you are to believe it to be fact.  Logic though also would say that you need to then involve emotion into the equation, why are these patterns happening?  Where is the cycle stemming from? Where can the cycle be broken?  And then from there you can put emotion into logic.  Anything that can be done can be undone, anything that can be done can be redone.  Vigilance is key.  If anything though this could tell you I my real self do not have martial training, but I do have the academic training.

Even in the aftermath of something that once was there can be a beauty, brought forth from a sense of wonder.  If life as it once was, was hell, then this CG here is hell frozen over.  Paradise (Equality with not just each other, but also the environment), Purity (Lettings things remain as they are), and Collectivism (What can you do to hep each other) stand in direct respective opposition to Chaos (Imbalances and upsets that give to much power to too few), Corruption (The changing, sometimes by FORCE, of the way things are), and Individualism (What can you do to help yourself).  Even as these values oppose each other, none of them are inherently good or evil, which means only those who wield them and those who may feel they are being wielded against, each get to decide themselves if it be for good or evil.  In all cases though, too much of any given value value in either direction can stifle the growth and development of the group or the induvial.  When such values remain too critical for too long... you get the very world setting for the VN you established.

Rebel against nature and fundamental forces and it will rebel against you, fact.  Rebel against foundation and traditions and they will rebel against you, sometimes fact.  Here though is where the "humanity" comes into place because of both emotion and logic we can influence just how gentle or rough the rebellion is, in both directions.  The harder one side pushes the equally harder or softer the other will push back.  Small nudges, little variance, takes longer, but minimizes risks.  Large shoves, high variance chance to completely obliterate instead of coexist, changes can be immediate, but control can stand to change hands frequently.  This is what makes the difference between what we say we want and what we show we want.

Humble and pompous/stuck up, the difference between someone you can admire and someone you can resent...

We all have our beliefs, but being able to back them up is important!  Given that many of mine deal with immaterial, only those who have had similar experiences can understand.  Having something to backup claims made is important to swaying those who are unsure, undecided or even only just starting to be in opposition.  Still though make it the truth and not something made up lies or manipulations, else you start to form a bit of cult or gang mentality...

Our pasts, sharing them, discussing them, is key to helping us understand who we are now to each other.  Think of the present always as the cover of the book, if you judges someone based on one moment, you are going to blind to everything behind.

Respect! Responsibility! Kindness! The cornerstones.  Break those and you break Trust and Worth.  As one falters so to shall the others, everything collapsing form on high.

Sometimes you have to know what your getting into, sometimes you have to make a leap of faith, sometimes, you need one to do the other.  Hope we can land on all fours!!!  Crazy kitty! (but I've had my sona thrown clear through a mountain from such maneuvers...), freedom and danger can go hand in hand, but being in control of oneself minimizes danger risks, and with practice too mind.

I have no skill..., but I do seek to be kind, wish to think things out, and wish to take my time with things.  Trying to rush of force things only ends up in disaster.

If only law enforcement ever had weapons, then it would much clearer about drawing liens of connection with it use and abuse, as then only one group alone would shoulder the burden of scrutiny.  Give it to masses not ready for the responsibility, and you invite chaos from those who think they know better or think they have no choice.  Remember a weapons only allegiance is tot he one who wields it.

Technology is meant to aid Humanity, not replace humanity, and after all when technology stops working right, who can ever fix it? Humanity.  Take humanity too much out he equation and major faults can be exposed or happen.  A flipside is to build technology that works with the environment instead of against it.  It is not impossible to build technology that works with nature, to not only keep balance, but also to improve it.  Yes this is largely what could eb call bio tech or cross tech.  Hydro electric dams are probably the best example, I think, even compared to solar or wind.  They use the water to give humanity power, but they also allow for the water to continue flowing as if the dam wasn't there, and even better is when made to have exterior steps so that fish life that resides in the river can move freely past it in both directions.  Work with nature and nature will not work against you, everything has an gradual impact.

Ah yes the issue with having both private and public task forces... there is always an issue when comes to protect and serve everyone, and protect and serve one given individual or group... the difference between many given values, whether intentional or not.  If the private force is kept small enough but skilled enough, then there is little risk in both varieties of interfering with other, and even when minimizes conflict and smooths corrections.  Smaller population means both tighter control AND better discipline.

Cold war, its war not being waged in the wide open, but it festers still, breeding ill in all of us when we are closed of and disconnected from each other and the reality any given induvial faces.  War and hatred come from a lack of understand or consideration, when brought to a fever point by masses.  Impulse control and discipline... so lacking...

To have been able to say so much from what little you have thus far is always something I find remarkable, because it shows to me, to be able to give this back, how much effort you have put into it.  Still words are one thing, actions are another, I wish my trust and generosity were not exhausted...

Yes! Got it!

I guess I still don't quite get it, but it does make sense.  Used to only one head per character ^^;

And yes I was totally rubbing my own temple while trying to think about it. *facepaw*

A bit late to trying this VN, but here is what I see/say/comprehend:

Glad to have content filters, even if I have no need for them, having options like this feels good.

So they treat their wives rough? Sheesh!

Love the ear movements!

To be named after your own species/ethnicity... ugg...

Guh? Who you calling a lady! Oh wait lad y ! X3 (Damn English...)

Unless the command is immoral..., but I don't think that will happen.

Uhm... when was the introduction to this Samuel?

I don't do well with confrontational situations, but the bigger issue is knowing if its serious or just in fun (fake)...

Being serious and being uptight are not the same thing, I'd rather have pleasant fun, while not in a serious situation mind, then to deal with someone who has an air of making other suffer.  In either case, fun or serious, don't take it too far!  I'd rather have a happy doggy!

SALMON! <3

Wait is he African Wild Dog or a Painted Dog??? Which?

Wondering what MC looks like?  No mirror yet though.

Glad to be near sited, I like to be able to see details up close, but being far sighted has its perks too!

Now that what I wish more for, those who have higher status willing to pay heed to those below them.  To recognize each others efforts in make each others lives be able to continue as they are.  Poor make wealthier richer, so in turn rich use those gains to help keep the poor going and happy.  In either direction the efforts to make the other happy, help to keep the other productive too.  Its all in about using what you have to show you care, and willing to help.

Given prior dialogue, I'm hoping cats and dogs can get along!

Pup? I thought we were kitten? Meh doesn't matter much!

Love that sause too!  I favor sweet and sour things or generally I aim for better than bittersweet.

Does kindness always have to kill others?  Maybe it does when all you know of is hardship or making things hard on others...  It helps to be know/be told when its time to leave something alone for the time being, not always easy to tell, not always easy to follow..., but it overlaps with trying to understand others... try once... try twice... a third time though is when you make or break.  Then again even I have difficulty explaining myself at times.  Above all else is our perceptions impacting our actions and reactions.  When things get heated, just need time to think apart...  Doesn't help to be interjecting in situations you do not have full understanding of... which is why I find it important to ask questions and not fling assumptions.

I take it my favorite kind of falcon here is not fully arted?

Hope that wasn't any sort of route selection right there, but he doesn't seem too upset/upsetting, just need to ease into it.

WOOF!!!

Dah! Don't overthink things!!!! DXD

Since he was grumpy I decide to go with... Noodles! :3 (Because of observation about his tail ^^;)

Hard to wake up nicely when you are being forced awake...

While it would be lovely, if he is that much a novice, what good will come of forcing him?  I'm really loving how the characters are balanced so that you can (not SHOULD, just hat you can) agree with them on some things and not on others!  Be too pushy and you will get resentment and push back after all!  And noddles even apologies! <3

To humble and be humbled, both without even a tinge of resentment, tone and phrasing are key.  Afraid to lose dignity and self respect perhaps?  I could think of far less pleasant people to be around than noddles!

Hrm... in this case, would it hurt to ask?  Hrm... knowing skills is important... I hardly know many for real.  huh... just like my dad... he tells me to be careful, yet he is the one who keeps hurting himself :/  Urk.. I'd wish to help..., but in this case it feels more like an order AND there are others around to help anyway.  If bad events start to form a pattern, then it becomes hard to think there could be anything else but the conclusion drawn.  The only way to beat psudeo evidence is with hard evidence and facts.  Its even more of a struggle when accusations start flying back and forth.  Find the route of the problem(s) else all remotely involved will pay eventually... *clenches and sighs* and then the problem just festers, grows, and infects...  This is how munity and revolution happen, it all starts with something small that ignored or overlooked, when it then turns to widespread speculation...  We may not be responsible for the sins that come from those before us, but we are just as guilty if we let it continue or repeat and enforce the same mistakes, and it becomes hard to tell anymore who is innocent and guilty of what... just one big mess like a rigged powder keg with dynamite strapped, along with countless fuses and a inverse game of chicken where the winner is also the loser...

Oh so that is the stripes! Doctor Stripes!  Again wish could stay more, but when it comes to work, work should come first, as long as any concerns are being addressed and well cared for!  It is possible to take things seriously and still be emotional after all!!!

Can't blame the guy for the quip..., but I'm not quite sure now is the time!  If it weren't for being surrounded by all this water I spray him! XD  ... Whack a lizard???  Now this is interesting turn of events! Glad something can be common ground!  Manned is fine for now, lets have fun!

(I just want to boop their snoots! Such amazing artist you got! ^^)

Woah a CG for this! Nice!   Teeff! Smiles and grins!  Oh interesting getting the choice to twist our own fate!!! That a first for VNs! (That I've seen)  Hrm... I may be upset, but I can't just go around DEFYING everything...

Cat Call??? X3, darn! Get to see MC but only bits, can't even tell what sort of cat he is or even the face!  You know just how to tease!!!

I wouldn't join in on a bet like this, but for the VN it feels right.  The funny part when you sperate your head from the MCs head at times.  Seriously agreeing on giving HIM the most middle numbers?  If it wasn't in fun it be a death wish!

Lady Luck or Lad y Luck? X3  HAHAHA! That classic comedy/psychological trick! XD  Hrm.. Choices Choices..., my issue is not knowing just how much does Kitty know?  Wouldn't want to gossip, but saying something like this in their face could also be an issue... not knowing how Kitty will spin things is troubling to know what is wrong or right... but that could be just it, there may be no right or wrong answer here! So lets not say what already known about us three and go with the two others, eh?  Seriously dude? (Well then again you guys got me interested in nearly all of you already! Damn fine!)  Horsy is uptight, but I can't say right now its unreasonable!

Valiant... Valiant but tainted... While I seek purity/consideration/consent, anywhere I go ends up eventually succumbing to everything but that... the good name of something named, being ruined by its own people... its horrible how ignorant we are of our masses... and the voices of the concerned are stifled..., times may change, but throwing everything out is not the answer either..., combine tradition and solid foundations with newer concepts, else something is bound to crumble from lack of proper support, like a house of cards, or the foundations crack and everything is chaos from no longer being recognizable, this the point of balance and being slow and steady, no jumping and no forcing, take time and not demand things change, make things change, by showing just how the new can still embrace the old, and in turn prove its not that different, conflict only divides.

The difference between "cat naps" and something like "trash panda" is that naps came before cats, but raccoons came before before trash cans.  One is something universal among all living things, a semi physical "concept" needed to "live" that is then applied to something that seem to enjoy doing said activity.  The other however is applying something man made and physical to something that was already scavenger to being with, let alone the term trash or garbage is inherently negative as it means something that has outlived its use (to its owner anyways).  This why referring to Raccoons as "trash pandas" I find insulting, for you are then branding them for something that is your own fault.  Using both these logics and discrepancies though I need help to realize and differentiate from the and possible dualities of bigger pictures, how do they apply to both general concepts and specific scenarios?  This is what I as much as those who are in opposition of things may struggle to understand, what came first?  What is the origin? What is the history?  It would do wonders to help clear things up for EVERYONE.

Ah nice a spot to come back to later! Great! I don't deserve what is planned here yet anyway! ^^;  Maybe another time!

Oh and I know we get to name MC, but still needs a record in the logbook on the main menu!  Just need the name to be something like MC in brackets or quotes?  Since we do not have control over the backstory anyways! Right?

Was referring to Thorin the new guy, but any of them smiling is just awesome to me!

Even more is to make me happy is people knowing when they made a mistake, even if its not right away, and even if it has to be pointed out, and even if small, to be able to apoligize, and for it to be accepted.  Manners matter to me.  Wish they were taught more these days...

Hrm... just to point out in order to avoid confusion, but when you refer to a single head its the same as referring to a single person. So "(Head) rubs their temples"  Is the Head rubbing their own "temple" or is the head rubbing all of their joint temples? In which case it needs to stated that they are doing so. (Because each head is its own identity, while their whole body is a joint identity, using a plural word when referring to a singular action is what is causing the confusion here)   (after derp, forgetting about possible translation issues)

Would say something here, but what I just said renders it pointless (would go against it)

Living in the dirt doesn't mean you have to behave like dirt :/  jeez Neef!

Not sure if the music for (to call for now) "The Cloak" is fitting, but hat depends on his exact role in the story, the music is tinged with wonder and mystique, but so far he seem the exact opposite, though still mysterious.  This could change though, he could be only playing an adversarial role for some unknown reason.

It may come as a surprise, but you are the one of the first to use sprites for the projectiles!!!  Strong and controlled magic/abilities, dealing with a respectable master here.

Sometimes its about perception of the situation, and knowing even the improbabilities.  This a large part of my sona's design, to be not only what these two can do, but blend it all into various tactical states and shifts.  Highest level of combat is not only adapting to your opponent, but also forcing your opponent to have to adapt to you.  Sadly this is only an extension of my beliefs, my sona is designed as a perfected ideal, so of course the real me would forever fall short, far more a thinker than fighter, more a pacifist then an aggressor, more a protector of what I value and believe in... no system is ever perfect though, and I even designed my sona for that, for as strong as may be there are still shortcomings.  Aim to high too quickly and it WILL blow up in your face.  Good thing I am used to at times making a fool of myself.

Now THAT was interesting!

As much as I like being humble and humble beginnings, anything can be lead astray...

Fear of unknown is normal, but he key is knowing you are or something is unknown in order to keep a more open mind, if only one were to ease into things things and not force them, acceptance could come a lot easier..., not everyone is ready to accept things, much less have them thrown at them!

I would ask for bit more detail on the way to the church, while you do mention those paying attention to James, what about some of the buildings seen or people about that are working or not paying attention?  On that note the little girl is a nice touch! :D

It may be a bit of work, but at some point coming back here to let here be a scene for the Mass is an excellent world building opportunity.  I can understand skipping it for now if you wish, but skipping parts where interest and immersion can be drawn to are important!  Its the beauty of works of art not yet finalized! :3

Excellent! Highlighting the areas of focus attention on the map, to show exactly where James is looking!  You may want to redo the Deer (looks more like a Dragon, Deer antlers are generally upright, I think) and Feline (looks like it could be Fox or any animal with triangular nose, and no whiskers, though not sure if whiskers needed) (it also sort of looks smudged?), and also the Wolfen one isn't thick/bold like the others (for consistency).  In the end though none of this really matters when you done good job explaining it all!  Badgers and Otter icons not there, but could be considered newer than the map (a canon reason they aren't shown).  Same goes for the other ones, but that may also need arrows or having them spaced out around the shown island to point out generally where is their (initial in event its now shared) territory.  This is all here only if you want to add more detail visually.

That is a good drawing!

Not the same, but Grandfather passed away recently, and he was Army Veteran, and through his work after that he helped a lot of people, or at least tried to, hard to know when I don't know the people he had met, but he showed that he tried! :3

Uh... James did you forget you got throw clear across a room?  Also if you put in research for this scene, good!  I can't tell since I do not know all the particulars, even first hand.  A good CG!  Could always go back later to add in subtle variations to their bodies as they talk etc., but this is the minimum I could hope for, that does make me happy! And of course could wait until a good while later if your art improves too!  After all everything you done so far could only be appetizer compared to what the main dish is! X3  Age doesn't have much to deal with strength, but it does in terms of how to use it!  Smarts is all about using strengths of others against them!

Damn and I thought Dylun was Rad!  And I'm a sucker for those toothy smiles!  Really showy!  Fighting is only fun when its friendly.  Always better to fight with kindness but not always so easy...  Even meatheads have brains, but OW! XD

After that there is no transition to what happens next???  Nothing to indicate the sudden change in perspective!  The all consuming negativities..., but that is only the surface, there is always hope if there is understanding of why these feelings have festered... but the more far gone the harder it is to ever change them..., but in turn they all spread unless kept in check...

Its surprising even for my myself at how much can be said from a little, if only one looks beyond what is shown or said before them, for understanding is also to learn of and about others.  They do say though that big/great things come in small packages!

Derp sorry referring to Dexy, I'm sure I could easily find a translation program to use, but I'd rather have one that is guaranteed to work (course I don't mean the translation being exact in terms of work)

For you though could be interesting to come back to every now and then or use it with a different game engine even!  I do find RPGMaker to be a bit clucky at times.

D35 Is Killing with Kindness a form of Mercy???  If so I'd approve, much better than feelings of harshness and abrasiveness.

Its been a while so I don't remember if Tanabe had sprite last time I played/read,  but I do remember it being mentioned he would have one! :3

D36 This is what happens when you make assumptions based on only what you see, AND you do not talk things out to get to the bottom of issues or reasons, ALWAYS be thinking about what you don't know, so many of us don't want to burden others with our own shame... and instead of trying to understand... we rather take the easy way and creation friction... making war...  I want o think beyond myself, I want to acknowledge there are things I do not know, but I can only act upon what I do know, not what I should know... since when did trying to be selfless become an act of selfishness?  oh because of people who are selfish who would rather take advantage of others trying to learn of their troubles, who would cast out and blame others for their own actions, refusals, and denials.  To be a nightmare to others is from being a nightmare to oneself, misinformation and misinformation lead to lack of clarity, and halts progress and bogs everything down.

I say what is on my mind, I say it in order to check my understanding as much as others, I say why I believe in it, I acknowledge where there are possible faults if I am even aware of them.  But what good is that when it falls upon the blind and deaf to consumed in their own madness?  It only stands to embroil more into madness.  Both like an infection and a cult, without care for others, nor desire to see their own faults.  I bleed, I cry, I get angry for those who treat others like disposable garbage just because their life is garbage, because they don't bother to understand how and why their lives got to that point.  Many a thing can be more easily resolved if you deal with issues by working backwards.  There is always more than meets the eye.  I am alone but because I am alone I can more easily see, think, and observe.  There is also a big difference in finding (POINTING OUT) a problem, dealing (SOLVING) with a problem, and ignoring (DENYING) a problem.  What angers me most is inflexible people trying to force their will on others.  It in turn is making me more and more inflexible, but will maintains that their must be a middle ground, else everything is just scorched earth, because when words fail, actions, then fights, then war remains, and NO ONE is happy.  I hate and read the feeling like there is no way forward, but here is also no way forward when one takes it upon themselves to speak for all, and be judge, jury, and executioner.  I though speak for the abstract, that which is not material, for there then can never be only one voice.  I don't like either feeling compelled to put this all here, but belief in awareness, both positive and negative, is of value to me.

back to D36 Friend or Foe give it your all, those who take things too personally can't be your friend, and if already your foe, they are a foe to all..., in the end yet another thing that can easily become murky despite itself... when you don't take things seriously, you will get walked all over... that is why I fight for greater awareness, beyond bubble and narrow minds, beyond to seek to chances to learn or correct myself... I fight with logic, for logic, and give it heart..., but even then I am only me alone, and even words can be empty promises... also when it comes to war and fights, when it friend against friend, it becomes the worst because as much as not wanting to take a side, can also be viewed as betraying both, then causing you to alienate yourself, so instead its better to break it up instead as the means of getting involved... so exhausting... damn husky and hare..., but now kita n hare...

On another note the value of reconnecting with why you started to do or believe in something in the first place, to go back to the/your roots, to expunge what you feel has been placed on you be it your own or others, this is a feeling I myself have trouble shaking off, for because I am dragging behind, it makes me drag behind further... in the end this one is my fault and my fault alone, but breaking free may require either a series of small adjustments or a big push... doing so alone though makes a snail look like a racecar... for all I am or for all anyone is, there are some walls that block you in ways you are not used to dealing with.

And there it is again MERCY, COMPASSION, KINDNESS, the means to that can change a foe in the moment, to someone who can respect you in kind!  The idea to shown gratitude for even being challenged, though however that does require it to be worthy of challenge AND proof of being challenging... a challenge is something that need only last a given time frame, a threat is something that has no given expiration date... its amazing how easy it is to confuse the two... and confusion is our worst enemy...

Rules of the game... yet what happens when there are no rules, or the rules are made up as you go along, or when the referees permit the obvious breaking of the rules?  What does it feel like to be micromanaged like you are an incompetent fool only being used as a tool?  What does that say about those who are doing the micromanaging? Gah...  break the cycles!

Mind, Body, and Soul (or heart), if you do not head them all and neglect one while engaging too much the other ones, you will burnout... can't even begin to count how many times I myself have gone through it...

D37 3.. or 6? I dunno RL years, 3 months game, granted spilt between 3 er 4 routes, but yay milestone!!! :D     Discussion beast argument any day, but how do you discuss something with someone who is always arguing?...  I hope being an ass is not normal... then again adjusting just one word in a phrase can change a lot about how it comes across... and text is to ideal way to convey emotion either...  headache... headbang... head on desk... check... why do I care so much even *sigh*

In this Case (route) isn't there a 4th S? XP

Jun Cute but hopeless..., but not clueless... Why do all the characters remind me of myself! >.<, none are perfect fit, yet fit me perfectly... @.@  Then again I live for upbeat and awkward....  even I find myself strange at times... SALMON!!!

I'm tired of people always bitching... that why I bitch about bitching... not sure if that is any better... find agreeable solutions instead of complaining dammit! :/

Is there an achievement for no achievements???... head hurts...

Claiming to me that I don't deserve something, isn't the same as me claiming i don't deserve something... and I always tend to feel like I don't quite earn enough to be given a treat like this..., but its a treat like this that I want to share with all..., when I choose to support something I do it because it in tur supports me..., though I do think that is an ideal many us strive for, even if it never the same desires or tastes..., just makes it all the worse when others want to ruin our fun for their own amusement, though then again there are misunderstandings, etc... *sigh*  Can't I be allowed to believe that something can be good, rather than be provided reasons to keep doubting intentions... That is how I've gone from optimistic to ceaseless pessimistic over many things... made scared to even make an attempt to try changing my veiwpoints... , still nothing turns me on more then sincere tender moments like these, I am such a hopeless romantic..., couldn't be happier! X///3 (also opps too! heh...)

Guh... on and off replaying this over 3...5...7...10 days, making me laugh and cry once again over it all, I'd apologize for this wall of text, but I'm not sure what I am exactly apologizing for, or even if I am really sorry.  No longer being certain around something you would have otherwise have been sure of, nothing is scarier, then to be afraid of oneself.

Side note, is once again some of the minor characters mentioned I can't help wanting to have some image of them, but that is a more personal desire of mine, the descriptions you give of them are good enough!, but also why I want an image! Gah! XD

FYI Restarting the game from scratch, that is just how long I've been away and how much I loved it in the first place, and still love it!

And still maintain YuuSho all the way!  But can't help loving ALL the characters!  Going to take so real resolve to try out the others, it makes me feel like such a traitor, not only for what I see for the story, but also things I believe in.  Still challenging myself beyond my comfort zone may be what I need, but I never can be sure if I'm ready.

A chord struck with me right now..., here back in day 12 after first upset match..., with me feeling the need to stop taking my meds, to face myself without that protective wall, this feeling that Kei feels is what is always there under the surface, a feeling of flatlining and going or getting nowhere, feeling defeated for even feeling defeated, even for something small.  My life certainly is void of a lot of pressures the VN characters face, but pressure is still pressure, and while the meds took the edge off, it also made it feel like I was never the one actually accomplishing anything.  Always a feeling of stuck in limbo, not feeling like I can quite do things on my own, but also faltering when I do have help, a very backwards feeling...  yet too do I see it as Sho,  no matter how hard I fall, nor what the reason(s) may be, I always get back up again..., but that takes time, though this recent event in my life feels as harsh as I felt before I started taking my meds...

I used to crawl from being so young and not understanding why I felt the way I did or why I acted the way I did, meds and therapy helped to elevate me, the meds a crutch, the therapy a means to stand on my own..., but over time and without realizing it, just like some of the other illnesses I have incurred that of incurable but not dire kind, oblivious to the answers through ignorance, lack of knowledge, or lack of common sense, all from a lack of practice, that the meds stared to isolate me from some of the feelings that I should have been having...  I may be  Autistic, but its no wonder I felt at times more akin to a machine despite my emotions, its hard to feel for something you don't understand or comprehend, but perhaps its worse when you have no feeling at all...

A year a minor deviation from who we once were... a decade a major deviation form who we once were... makes me wonder at 50, regardless of things good or bad at that point in our life, are we really the same person?  Even as we may never yield what may be our core, everything else has been changed to be unrecognizable, but such is the passage of time...

This is why I love and gave top marks for this VN, for just how real it is, for how it goes beyond what is at the surface and dives deep, there bringing to light fears, doubts, inner darkness and turmoil, we may not even be aware of of our own selves.  There is always more, but that requires all to open up and for all to listen.  Still yet saddest of all is how pain is the quickest teacher, but it is better to be shared pain of sorrow, then to the pain of a single edge of a knife.  Slow and steady keep moving forwards, no matter the setbacks, and roadblocks, just have to find a way around them.

The next Chord, CS S2, the harshest truths are often those we are most unaware of or try to deny, there is always two sides to every story, there is a reason for those sides existing, but unless you get to the bottom of it all, it will only ever be cause of friction and drama, for without understanding that is all there could ever be, for it cannot be ignored if you keep running into it.  Ignoring problems doesn't make them go away, it only ever lets them grow.  This is what frustrates me about life and people in general, only furthered by attempts to ask questions be viewed as insults.  If I can learn, I can understand and if I understand, I can do away with any preconceived notions, a positive reinforcement, but to be shot down for even getting close, may as well lead to declaration of war... *sigh* and this is where for me a lot of internal conflict arises from a cycle of beliefs that end chasing each other, leaving me in the dark, between feelings of sad and angry for both myself and the others.  Can irrationality ever be rationalized???  Its funny how they are only ever the ones who seem to get a position of power, only to then abuse it... a cycle of madness, not only form being out of touch but not even being able to be in touch...  All of this helps to highlight the exact reason Haruki and   comes into play in the story here, to question that which you may have been unaware of and why it leads to such a conflict with a short fuse between Yuu  and Sho, when they are forced to open their eyes to their ugliest sides, instead of masking it.

D18 - Total blockout and all encompassing wall..., all because of decisions made by and made for us..., even at our perceived best, there are so many small details that slip by, around, and through us... I am no exception... it why I question everything, and only once you are brought down low do you start to see the finer details..., it becomes hard to know who is really at fault, who is really to blame, when its all a tangled mess of hopes and dreams dashed, not even knowing if you are the one chocking yourself to death...  its sad and funny how I feel like I have or perhaps had??? the potential for anything if only I dedicated all of myself to it,  I could have all of something, but no, I have never seen much value into having something solely to myself, I'd rather give than take, I'd rather share, I'd rather aim for less than perfect, so that the scattered pieces could fit with others... the struggle of the feeling that I have been able to fit in anywhere, yet never quite belong..., but sometimes instead need to take huge steps back, and attempt not one thing, but everything from a new angle... if my best is not enough, if my (subtle?) pleas aren't heard, if logic is discard, feelings thrown in the trash, my desire to care looked upon as nothing more than insult... what else can I do but turn my back on friend and foe alike, if I have to go so far back?  This where everything gets complicated with Sho... he has lost one of the most important parts of himself, and in turn titters on the edge of whatever prospects he has left that are his and his alone.  It is damming and damaging, a torture of ones own psyche upon themselves, when they become their own worst enemy... there is no more treading, nor even swimming, just a floating feeling, aimless.  Even if I am feeling a little, there are wounds that can never be healed within one lifetime.  Me or Sho could get the resolution we desire, somewhere in the middle, but there is now a disconnect, from the feeling of earning it or from it deserving us.  This what a truly burned bridge looks like, even repaired its still unusable.  Not all hope is lost, but there is no hope left to be gained...  It may still be there staring at you, going on without you, but the path between is both a maze and an eternal fog... to try so hard or perhaps too hard and falling so short for things that you never seen holding you back.  All I know is I need to start paying more mind to myself and my own issues.

D19, the duality of never being able to quite let go, but also knowing enough to not let it impact your continued living too much...  I can't stop, but I need not dwell on it at all times...

D20, staying silent when hurting as to not hurt others, I don't want to burden them, but when others hurt others I have trouble keeping silent, in this I am no different compared to my targets/ers... but what is to be said about them when I am the one trying harder to hold myself back??? *sigh* nevermind...

D21- Something I may never have... something I never had a chance to have, something I never realized I could have (at the time/their age)..., but for while I may never quite live, I live for others to live, even if I am not involved,  I care to know of those who have found a way..., my life is not about me, but my life is not wasted, if I could help others to have more moments like these.  If only I didn't feel so lost, but its always been that way for me, a want to live, but lingering feeling of pointlessness... Will I ever make it?  Will it ever matter?  I wonder and worry, perhaps more than needed.

D22 all its takes is one mindless action to tear everything you believe in or fight for from you, both first and second hand, this is what provokes my fear, anxiety, and despair, to feel that crushing weight, or simply be knocked by the shockwaves... and to have this action repeated, it reaches a point where it splits to a feeling of oblivion and/or anger, fury, vengeance... makes it hard to see straight, makes it hard to suddenly trust anyone who you thought may be willing to help you, if they ever even meant it...  Rome was not built in a day, but in one day its was nothing but ash... anything can be ruined, anything can be corrupted, anything can be misused, misinterpreted, or misdirected... when an key foundation for which one or something stands is desecrated so... there stands to be nothing left to fight FOR, leaving only AGAINST and only if even fi dared... good intentions ruined just for the amusement of others... I never had the chance to know you, but hat stands to be my fault for belief that I be too much a bother..., all this text is proof of just how much I try to hold back, this could have been done by me for every release, but no I tried to keep it to about a paragraph, if even.  My restraint lies in my desire to be respectful.  I cannot say I have entirely mindful of this in all cases with others, but I say what say to not only share my thoughts, but also to point out my own shortcomings, which may be tainting my view, in an effort to understood or to try to be understanding, for if I hold back too much, finding a way to get through to others or to myself may be rendered impossible.  This rampant one way only wall is what I keep seeing and hearing about everywhere, news, media, movies, boards, messages, groups, etc.  everything gets to point where containment fails... and for each loss so many others end up bleeding too..., until its a chaotic mess of miseverything... WWIII may yet end up being nothing more than an endless chain of civil wars with MANY sides, and that is my biggest looming fear that is beyond myself... we are already living in a pre war state..., my concern becomes who will make the first irreversible action?  Who cares about the various doomsday scenarios, when the enemy is from within ourselves?  heh... it surprising how much can extrapolated from so little when you bother to look at the fine details, but on a much greater scale...  think of Sho and his Dad... but everywhere, a dystopia without end, a place where everyone will feel violated at any given time... never deny the potentials or possibilities, lest they manifest unaware... the thought alone of all this looming but ignored like a tsunami being held back by a dam that is ill maintained, makes me quiver shake and curl into a ball...

Yet again despite being a lone wolf sort, I do not have desire to live for myself, I also cannot live by myself, and the feeling of being able to fit in anywhere but never belong... a want for things I cannot do on my own, and to hold things immaterial more important than even the five senses... and the thought of having to turn my back on those pursuits in favor of a need to be more selfish, just to preserve myself from everything, good or bad, within and without, sickens me, and quite frankly, if it wasn't for developed sense of self-awareness, I would not even be here, and no one at all would ever have known me, for it is all I feel I have that has kept from insanity or suicide.  I describe myself/my sona as only 3/7 the rainbow, and I do mean it quite literally, always a feeling of incompleteness, even as I accept it.

D22 = 42 , my ideal 42, a 42 I'd wish for all, but sadly it will repeatedly add up to 666... roughly 1 in 16... while 777 is roughly 1 in 19... I think too much..., but its what I'm good at....

D24 Shining example of my frustration with, of, for, against, because, myself, of another, and generally just not knowing what to do when there are knots of varying sizes and shapes constricting all over... to be silent is to ignore the larger issue, but to be vocal is double edged.... so why do I keep seeing this since elementary school? perhaps its in knowing I do tend to be in conflict with myself at times since then??? I may never really know...

D27 Sho and Yuu may as well be disecting myself, but even within the answers are more contradictions... being like both of them... arguing like both of them... oy...  and then later Saya and Yuu, THINK DEEPER! if something doesn't make sense or seem clear, that is why asking questions HELPS, but still don't bite too hard, or the lesson taught is that it is impossible...

D28 Give me a reason to respect you first, give me a chance to feel, otherwise I will not feel there is right if all that is shown is might... do not demand and command, make me feel I have value or sparks will fly, one way or another... and further down this line might as well be playing hot potato with an actual hand grenade *shivers yet burns*... this applies both was...

D31 Mixed Messages, tangled knots, hard to even know if sides even exist in such a puzzle of puzzles...  its why I can never truly say I'm right or wrong, as smart or wise as one can be, WE DO NOT and CANNOT BE EXPECTED to AUTOMATICALLY KNOW EVERYTHING!!!  And then get insulted and pushed around as a result? WHAY THE HELL!  I cannot be clean either, but if there is no bridging the gap, everything falls down!... nrgf... goddamit... *sigh*

D32 What do it feel like to have the one thing or things that give you some sense of comfort ripped right away from you? How else can be taken when you are forced into a direction or path you do not desire?  Everything starts getting narrow and suffocating!!!  And indeed it does feel like things I have some manner of involvement in eventually end up imploding, but I'm never the one to push the red button, always the one there though because its getting mashed from multiple locations, even if unintentionally, >.<, and even then I alone am only one, so I am forced to address only one enclosed area, while the other may end blasting apart... leaving nothing behind for me to learn from...  it certainly feels that way, when even your olive branch is used as kindling for another's arson...

I think I'm starting this off a build behind this one.

That was quite twist of a dream, to far from the ones I've been having recently, but of an emotional kind.  As if a glimpse of something beyond comprehension.  Headache too, torn between the there and the here and now.

How I miss the feeling of learning, and the structure of a schedule.  I think that is what I have been missing most to keep grounded and focused, now that I am, at this point in time, feeling like I am floating in the void, never far, but just out of reach.

A sense of community, a sense of kinship , a sense of purpose... this what I need but I need it in person, if I don't take a step forwards in a direction I've hesitated to travel, I would forever be holding myself back.  This what school helps to accomplish, but it only last for so long.  When one door closes, a new one must be opened, but it must be done so despite the apprehension.  Slow and steady...

My mind lately has feel a swirl of feelings and thoughts as much as the soundtrack... I will never stop praising the talent of everyone in the collective work on this VN for how it fits together in both wonderment and grace.  Gives me shivers, but with a smile.

Ah interviews, very important indeed, regardless if one agrees or disagrees with what they have to share, asking questions is key to understanding not only what one thinks or feels, but why they think or feel that way.  The key to understanding is to always go beyond/below the surface.

One again though can't help feeling miffed that this guy has no sprite or CG to show him..., but then again I said that about each of Kat's BFs too..., though that was Kat... I even said that about Ben's ex as well, but that was too open ended to be worth it to make all the possible combinations..., damn.. why am I such a helpless sucker for Canines and Felines?... hehehe... better to have small miseries than big upsets though.

Getting hired right out of college... how I wish things were that simple these days..., but between there being so many people getting a degree that fits or doesn't fit an existing job out there, and companies having ever increasing expiations of those starting at the bottom, there is getting to be an increasing gap beyond that of financial toll.  Still when one is lost, they just need some guidance and a helping hand, to know that not all of their efforts have been in vain.  Having a heart is what matters in the long run.

Something positive to look towards, no matter what is in our way, for me, that is my resilience, that no matter how often I may feel I've hit rock bottom, that I'm never there for but a relative moment.

On a tangential note, I still maintain that while I said from the start that Bryan/too forwards isn't my type, even while I am pursuing Carlos and Carlos alone, in terms of a friend he has grown to feel just right, that even without a romantic spark, he feels like he belongs in his own way.  As for Nate its more neutral, for him its rather that while I do apricate the many forms of art out there, I do not share the same level of passion or devotion as he does, and to me its rather that I feel like I am the problem in trying to be with someone like him.  I am happy for them both, but I don't feel like I fit he way I do with Carlos, where I feel like what he believes in and expects are highly similar to my own.  I feel like he is a mirror to me, half equal, half opposite, a right balance to balance myself without it ever feeling too much or too little.  God... I know this is fantasy/fiction, but I still cannot help falling so hard for them.  As if the very work is its own real world and reality.

I am a time sink ^^;, all of this in response to so little, both about me and not... always having more on my mind than even I realize, but give me a direction and I will blaze my own trail, even as I stumble or land on my face. 

Now now Ben, don't go getting TOO excited! X///D  Ah... Carlos, equal parts both someone concrete and a mystery, just enough to keep you on your toes, but not enough to feel alarmed.  Oh Benny boy... *sigh* hehe, but I do enjoy how its slow, it makes me feel all the effort is more apricated.  It feels me with glee how I squirm the same as Ben to feel as he feels in this moment, but also to Carlos for I sleep in my my only the bare minimum as well, but to prevent mishaps... >//..//< hehehe... Those arms and legs, that slight gut, that soft yet stern face, all those stripes...

As much as I'd like to see it all myself, I value more thinking about others than myself..., now just doesn't feel like the right time... this feels like something to savor for how it is, instead of trying to turn it into something it is not, small steps, small steps.  Who says that relationships themselves can't be edged? ;/3  Hoho! Attaboy! I'm tickled! It feels so in line with my own thoughts!  Holy crap! ://D  Even if that was to be expected, I'm still caught off guard! DAMN! >/./<

And next... this... THIS!!! This why I value the Golden Rule so much, why it is such a foundation and cornerstone to interactions, for, to me, to make another happy is to make oneself happy, hence why the value of sharing is also important.  If you don't give a certain emotion, you can't receive that certain emotion, if you don't receive a certain emotion, you can't give that certain emotion.  It is like money but with emotions, but their only value is what you give to them regardless of which end you are on.  It is a 2 way interaction in the end, and only when both can agree on it holding the same value both directions do you ever get the best results, for better or worse.

Chest pains? Hrm... And on this note I know I have people out there who care about me, but I don't feel it, I need something more than mere words, yet at the same time, I don't know how they can help me..., it sort of puts up an unintended wall, and cause of friction where there shouldn't be, for it also means there is a lack of trust, safe from allowing yourself to be let down by them, but also self damaging...

Except a great portion of the world doesn't seem to ever believe in schedules... with lack of proper organization, its no wonder there is some form of chaos to bear 1st, 2nd, or 3rd handed witness to these days... and generally people with too much time on their hands and not enough things to dedicate their focus on...

We knew it would likely happen, back even before route selection, if one was paying attention and choose the right door... its not the same as issues or complications of drugs as Andres, but its till the same feeling of watching someone just rot away and not be able to help them other than to try to ease their pain, if even possible..., that inevitability numbs the impact, but it still hits hard all the same, hell aside from my grandparents, I even got people I was never ever to meet or properly know out there who have died for various unfortunate reasons..., not knowing them make it hard for it to hurt so bad, but the idea of never getting to know them is where the rest of the pain lies... its also in flipside, that despite my anger with some, could I myself ever want to deprive others close to them?  Even yet again as this is a work of fiction... can I ever not feel sorry for what I have lost or never had? Can I for others despite what I see is misguided intentions or notions?  Its true we cannot be there for everyone at all times, but I'd hope by being there for those we can, that eventually things would work their way to those we cannot help too.  Nothing is ever so simple when life throws roadblocks in our way, causing a breakdown of communication and understanding, and sometimes turns into neglect.  What do we fight for when its no longer clear who the enemy even is?...

This moment in the VN could not be better to capture how I am feeling in this moment.  That look... that pain...the things we hide because we do not want to think or dwell on them... until comes a time there is no other way to look at it... the feeling of being robbed of what could have been, even if it was never to be...

Drugs good or bad, that stand to alter how you mind works, aside from for those who could never function without them, stand to always be double edged... they have their uses, but in the end its not the real you there... with recent events making me want to suddenly quit my anti depressants that I have been taking for some 17 years, its like blowing up a dam... to restore natural order through the destruction of an artificial façade..., despite how much it may have helped, it also held back..., I was never able to easily be sad when I ought to be, and when I was happy it was only because I was overly fixated on something... I've always felt that over the years taking a step forwards lead to taking two or three back... but perhaps this time I have to break myself harder than ever before to more forwards, to take one giant leap back..., I have always despite my wisdom felt I was behind everyone else, everything slipping further and further away, but also to complacent and reliant on what routine I had developed to see any other way.

I am glad to have the perspective shift again... its feels crucial at this point of events.  To understand is to know how others see things, and why.  Heh... the kindness and caring of others, but better even in person... it is the feeling of kindness or neglect that generally stands to push us down the most extreme of paths at every fork in the road..., and this what happened to wedge these twins so far apart from each other... one got neglect and the other praised, simply because their parents could not be there more, simply because their family was so large they had to put in more work to provide... this is not to say having a larger family is a bad thing, but if you put too much more responsibility in there than you can handle and something WILL break... (a law/rule of overpopulation?? I'm not sure what he right terms would be...) its crazy how much even the best of intentions can go awry...  its in a way its own sort of humanitarian crisis, but the enemy comes from within, from oneself... reach too high and the sun shall burn you, reach too low and the depths shall take you... dreams can only ever succeed if they are grounded and temper by reality, or simply realistic expectations, and careful planning... the smallest oversights often is all that is needed to topple everything...

Once again to dreams, that I feel like is me having lived another life, something now coming to me frequently like they have meaning, but evaporate and distort faster than a solid to a gas... makes me shiver...

Well that is one way to Russel us Russell! XD Even I derped!  And then to the other kind of russeling... down boy! now isn't the best time!, but its hard to not let things drag on too...  though here I am forcing myself to distance myself from a similar situation of being forced around like Russel..., though rather it is I who could no longer trust anyone to be there for me... those who could help me didn't and/or couldn't do anything to help me, and so things just kept slipping, but I couldn't directly involve anyone else, so I had to blow up what was left on my end, as a means to keeping anyone involved form sinking further... that feeling of neglect really gets to you and starts to ruin even the best things you have..., but it is all the more why I need to focus on myself and reality that is before me.  Martyrdom is most painful..., but better to keep it small lest it have true ramifications... part of it is why I am posting here instead of somewhere more easily accessible, one can't rewind time, but one can rewind technology! heh... *sigh*

Aw... darn... wish could have seen the rest of the day with Russel..., but I reckon that interaction was the highlight/point.  I was in Elementary School and already had a thing for awkward things/moments... I can't tell if that is a good thing or a disturbing thing... heh... the importance of getting out to distract yourself from your worries, god how I need more of that! Aussie! [ :D ]  *facepaw* damn Russel! XD

Independence and outsourcing never can mix! NEVER! XD   Hrm.. traffic Jam... what kind of bread does that go with?   I hate those assholes too! >.>   And that I why one is to ask first if they are unsure!  Oh gawd... I feel glad Zach is not here! Jeez Russie!  Well its certainly not Pier 1... hehe

Taken by WPP??? Those glasses...   that dread...

Damn! Lucky kitty!  Wait... interesting thing to notice, but view from PH, with Chris in middle, far building spires look like devil horns on his head... o.o

And back to the grind... but not with the best results, though they could be far worse!  First Nate or First Mate? Really Ben? Lying to a Law Student? X3  What is black and white and reads you all over? XD

Even my head hurts from thinking about all these things and typing all of this... sad and serious gives me quite the Pension for being Pensive! (Writer? Joke?)  Though set the mood, set the scene, set the stage, and I will follow, for the sake of seeing just how much I can identify with.  Shift topics, shift, focus, shift mindset, but it all revolves around that initial drawing in of interest, and you all have never failed to deliver even once, whatever may be the worst blunder made along the way thus far has still been a work of art.

Bleh! If only I could put this much effort into a college essay! Its always easier from it comes from one's own experience!

Unfortunate that this is only as far as a proof of concept/demo, but using some sort of game engine this seems like it could be lots of fun!  If I can translate it, I should be able to understand it better too!  Both for story and Dev wise/the effort you put into it.

May I ask what program you used/how to use it with this app?  I'm curious to the text and conversations.

Now I know why its called a Segmenter, how adpt a name.

While I would prefer safety, when given that safety can no longer be guaranteed even when it normally should be, it only leaves that you should do something..., but you still need backup..., good thing Theo does!

I feel like I need a map to properly understand where exactly they are on the property...

First time "bones" aren't a "key" heh...

Sure! Blame it on the kid for you not telling him the specs on the thingymcbober!!! *facepaw*  Be glad it wasn't a gun! Jeez!  Wouldn't want tigger happy with something like that would we! *shivers*

Doesn't seem like there is much new to go on... but not everything has been looked into yet to determine its value, so its hard to know without finer details.

Ah.. chronic depression... my lifes story... the me you don't see... with recent events 'm seeking to tossing away my meds... its true they helped, but hey have also hindered... to consider about 17 years of life half a lie because of it, because it was not truly me.  They were nothing but a damn holding everything back and everything in, but perhaps its time to let it out... trade one sense of living for another... I always try to be honest but humble, curious yet cautious, but in the end a lot of what is not shown by me to others is my inner turmoil, because I do not want to needlessly burden others.  With my meds gone it was like a raging storm, but now it like a strong tide, irresistible, but merciful.  So many things I've should have been sad for over the years that I was simply not able to.  I also recently lost my Grandfather too, now both my grandparents are gone from my dad...  While I've enjoyed spending time with them I only ever really felt close in elementary school, but hat was also a time where I was not aware of many things out there in life... and other issues kept me from ever enjoying it, leaving me in a state where I wish I could have spent more time, but also felt it did not feel right.  Such is the torn nature of my life and thoughts, unable to ever truly let go of the past, even the past I was never part of, before my time, but at the same time moving on.  A schism of my own autism, feeling both so old, yet still never really awake, stuck between unknown dreams, yet still here in reality.  In sense I'd describe it as a feeling of not bipolar of happiness and sadness, if all I've truly felt is sadness after all, but of the other axis, between silly and serious.  Without a sense of happiness though I can hardly feel silly, just a quiet but serious solitude for regrets I am unware and unsure of.  I continue to burn, but down to a low dim setting, at this pint in time, same as the foggy overcast skies are this week where I live.

I apologize for the spiel, but this also how I feel about rain, it confines for a time, and lets you check and reflect.  A somber and dim feeling, but not one devoid of purpose or life.  Both oppressive and yet a blanket of its own.  Small, yet here I still stand.

Proceeding on and in line with my own flow of words.  Yes I would like to think there some higher power, but it is incomprehensible and unable to be defined, and so it makes it hard to believe, for it is an unknown.  That is why I seek to believe that the power is something that goes beyond common religion, because there is nothing about to be made concrete.  It is an abstract, and common religion is too concrete.  Much is the same with my mom and religion in concern to my dad, let alone many people out there, as to how could they let people suffer... one thought is perhaps that here are too many people in the world, aside from the amount/lack of believers, that they can no longer perform miracles on the equivalent scale as in times of old.  Religion was made in any of its forms as a means of unity, aside from the idea of thought control.  When even there is fights over what god even is, it breaks that unity, and belief on both sides suffers.  To me, if a god ever exist, he existed in multiple forms/interpretations, for the sole purpose that it was tailored to the ways of life of the given people in one land as compared to another.  The idea that each god was the same god, but was a separate system that worked with the flow of their lives.  Like many a system though, once neglected or back turned from the core or initial principles, it breaks down and/or implodes, to the point that no two areas that claim to follow the same religion can even identify with each other.  In the modern day it is no different with mass beliefs, once enough of them turn their backs on what was initial purpose that identified them, that credibility gets shot, and not only is there infighting, there is a tug of war then from both within and without, with it being made hard to know who is right and who is wrong or what is the best course of action.  Such is the risk of overpopulation/oversaturation, let alone removal from being aware of the core that started it all.  Diversity is good for any sort of ecosystem, but too many foreign elements without careful oversight and time taken, natural order is disrupted.  Such are the largest and most repetitive sins throughout history.  Its make me think at times of myself and my own beliefs and actions, am I really acting? or am I only reacting? is what I am doing right, just, and fair? Even in my anger I wish I could have a means to see things differently, for I do not want to harbor grudges, but when backed into a corner, without an alternative, it is all there is left, and it also in turn makes me afraid of myself, for not being able to see any other way.

Similar responses to both the other questions, of course I would like to think we aren't alone, but without proof it is but a flicker of possibility, and of course I/anyone would want time travel to fix our (singular and/or collective) mistakes, but to change even a single thing is but a butterfly effect of the course taken of alternate timelines, leading to an end result that ruins everything you had known...

What is most important to me... so full of many beliefs and hopes, I am still unsure of what I really want or strive for... in that I am a lone wolf, but even still a lone wolf needs a pack, a sense of belonging, no matter how independent one may be.  I am not simply chasing..., I do not even know what I am trying to chase, but neither am I able to stop chasing, for I cannot be certain if I have ever made an impact, something beyond what could be considered my own bubble.  I'm no saint, but I do not wish to sin... that is why is even my creulest thoughts I do not think I could ever bear to have them reality, no matter how much I may wish for them, I am always held back for better or worse by the core of who I am.  Its why despite the craziness of the world, what I desire most is mercy and the means to come back from the worst of things.  That there is always a way, no matter how hard.  That we must all have heart, for in real life that is what makes us human.

Our deepest scars are the ones not visible to the naked eye.  And then right there too the conflict of mind and heart.  he heart clings, even as the mind knows to let go.  This doesn't mean its the absolute end, it is merely the end for now.  One of the reasons I felt there were subtle ways the special could be canon, but only if you took out what made the special... well special... This feeling Theo is having is ore less exactly how I have been feeling, so torn between what is wanted, and what is right.  There is also always tomorrow, as said, one thing at a time, just need to figure out what it is.

This also marks the third VN/Build that seems to resonate with how I feel in this moment of time as well as the things that I ponder in the back of mind from time to time, but never in as much earnest as this time.

Bleh feels like I keep giving sermons, but it represents just how deeply it makes me think, like a mirror, but not a one for one mirror.

I do... so many..., but at least I can say I alone am the reason for how I feel in this sense...
Sometimes I dive too deep, but there does seem to be a difference when it is done upon oneself, when you know it is your own darkness.

It seems to keep it from being a struggle, and letting oneself rise ack to surface, from comfort of knowing it your owns fears.

I wouldn't be surprised if its the only thing keeping me sane and from feeing rock bottom all the time.

Oy... does the night ever bring about my most abstract thoughts.

The opening is a bit rough and abrupt, but sometimes it may make more sense later or smoothed/more detailed.

I think I see the initiate theme/idea, but I myself have a hard time putting it into proper words to describe it, what I want to say is close, but I think misses the point.  I think this proves this is dealing with something I do not understand well enough of.

Dwat!? Oh that is sort of new... I knew I was missing something... *facepaw*

While my life isn't this hell, sometimes I can't help imagining it... While in life I am resilient and to bounce back from things eventually, I can't help but keep thinking at times a part of me is really just alone... flailing in the darkness, to await a lonely end... makes me wonder what life or existence it might be an echo of...

Confusion... not knowing meaning or intent or purpose... but sometimes things are beyond our grasp to ever understand, when words fail to describe the blur of something with no discernable form...

Uncanny that at time of trying this, my own dreams feel no different... fleeting and incomprehensible, nothing to discern, devoid of meaning, a blur unable to be remembered other than that is all it was..., even a dream journal could not help even if I were to be using one...

A place where life seems dull and fleeting... surrounded by a souless and timeless ever present gray... where the past, present, and future might as well be considered one... an existence without meaning... a trek that feels like a march of the damned...  and then the one place left where some hope may shine, even as its only a dull flicker...

If I were not alive, I feel like my heart stopped working for a moment..., this is also part where a CG would be perfect... since I do not expect these young uns to ever have sprites..., in this moment to have the heart ache but also feel numb to the pain... a vague sense of deja vu for me without any reason for it..., I have never felt such sorrows for real..., so why do I feel like I've seen something similar???

Am I looking into it too much? Perhaps..., but to me all I can do is read and listen and respond with how it makes me feel.  Even when there lacks a point, that may be the point.

Also making me think..., what if we lived in a world that was beyond saving, nearly destroyed and inhospitable, yet still just short of that infitismal %age of being permeant... where life is barely even living, yet there is just enough to be able to press on... that very thin line, as if the last strand, yet the strongest one...

I'm not sure if I am anywhere close...,but I don't feel I am anywhere far...

Even "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" (Greenday) isn't somber enough to be fitting this atmosphere, the song while about being broken and alone, still feels of life... this though, feels like all light has been short of snuffed out, yet still shimmers for all it is worth...

There must be a reason for this world created to exist as it does..., yet I find myself more afraid for once of knowing the answer...

One piercing thought does comes to mind though this gloom, what if this world is but a joint fabrication of those mentioned of NULL???  Though even then that only explains so much... the world by all means does not stand to be fake, but it could be thought as an existence far removed from even the laws (if they could even be defined) of (sub) consciousness?  Something higher than even gods of gods of gods...

Gosh this making me think so abstractly, but at night, its what/when I am able to do it best.

On the subject of gender/etc. its more opposite, rather it seems based on perception, and perception of the characters themselves at that too, as opposed as it being that of the viewer/player towards the characters.  I appreciate being able to see an example of this reversal.  To see what is like to be on the other end.

Even if there is lack of proper reason for it, having some purpose to take pride in is important, especially if it something basic designed to improve one's life.  For that I can understand Ertbo.

In the absence of higher technology, books are perfect... until I came upon the stories shown in games, let alone VNs, they were perfect and treasured... their value to me may have been lost, but heir worth in whole remains the same.  A reason sometimes to yearn for simpler times and years gone past... II think the spark for me in general stands to fade when I feel like I am the only one doing something amongst those I can come into real contact with that I can deem as my peers.  A sense of community or belonging, a sense of someplace where I could to help others as much as they could help me.  Its crushing to realize just how muted my life really is, that all I've really done is exist rather than live.  I must press on though, its all I can do.

This also goes with that despite being "luckier" (relative term here) than many that are out  there, I can't help feeling like they are the ones who are truly luckier... it perhaps goes with the saying that less is more...

Another sentiment, this time one that I feel like is something that really embodies a lot of how I feel and think, the waves and fluxuations, the crests and crashes, and the ripples and spray...  though also too the illusions it can bring... that when you feel like you are rising you are actually falling, and when you feel like you are falling you are actually rising... sometimes its hard to tell, but it can be all relative to ones viewpoint.  It is something that stands to make one question their onw judgement on matters.

And with that it comes to end, with it I feel tired, sad, empty, yet at the same time a sense of happiness, to see something that expresses some of my darkest/existential thoughts.  Where do you go from here with this VN? I cannot be sure, but asking questions related to what has been portrayed, and then finding some answer, that is my belief in being able to finding proper answers to many things.  It is always about looking deeper.  I can only thank you for what you have made thus far, and how much it has made me think about things I have not even thought of thinking about for some time.

WHAT!? but...

I have to trust there is a reason and purpose...

Even if this what I must look forwards to..., I did not just watch "Arcane" and "Dota" on Netflix for nothing...

I can't help the equal feeling of disappointment and sadness and that of how wonderful the orchestration and flow is...

Even if what I have dealt with, am dealing with, and will deal with, makes me want to run and hide in despair as much as I also wish to make a stand against.  Is real life really "Stranger Than Fiction"? (A movie) or is fiction just a form of manifestation of another's reality?

As much as I want to let go, I cling... as much as I want to cling, I must let go...

This may be a work of fiction, but it still bites too deeply... even if I cannot completely move on from yet another tragedy, I must accept it still... I must cling to my belief and hope, just as much as much in real life, that they will all be able to meet again someday...

Even when gone it cannot truly be the end... to me, even the creation of fiction is but the creation of another reality ("Inkheart" series), and there is always ripples, no matter how far...

When I had tossed you my "fun" idea awhile back, it had been in the height of happiness, a height of hope, a height of foolishness, for it can blind you to just how quickly tragedy can wipe everything from existence.  Funny how even as wise as I try to be, am but only me, and that I am only reading what is to come while already in the depths of despair...

It ironically or fittingly... I cannot be sure, makes me want o cling to you as much to cry out WHY? as it is to appreciate you for all your efforts...

In being autistic in the way I am... I cannot help my duality of never quite being my own age... I can be as wise as I can be desperate..., as childish as I can be stoic, as firm as I can flimsy...

Right here right now... as bizarre or awkward as it could be... it makes me wish I could cry, in my vain hopes, right in your arms or beside you, in person... to mourn the same way I think Ludus will to Leo.

I cannot help myself but express my thoughts and feelings, to me its of vital importance, even if in the end it accomplishes nothing...

I'm sorry to be like this...., but it also only makes me eager for an inverse reason to look forward to what you must have planned.  I'm just glad that it will at least fit together, its the only way I could ever accept it.  Even in sorrow I must look forward to the future.  Thank you so much, so very much.

After this latest build, I have a thousand questions...

This a lot of what feels missing form my life, the feeling of being able to bond with others in person, because I don't go out enough, to be with family like things used to be, to have something to do to give proper self worth (a job), a sense of belonging.  This is stuff I myself have to work on, but at the same time keep feeling scared.  I only ever feel happy if I can make others happy, so as much as I love having some form of ability to identify with the characters, its not real, it only makes me feel good for as long as it lasts.  I can't help but express how I feel, and long for simpler times.  Days gone by that we can't ever get back... and on top of that always feeling behind on the times.  Got to stop looking at the past so much, but I can't help it, I can't help with it at times when I don't feel like there is a future, and when I do see a future, it is all but fantasy...

This is what this work/build makes me think of.

Salmon! <3

I missed the window for 1.9.5 ...

but I'll take anything, I've been dePhileoLudusized for long time!

Claim what you want, but your inability to let things go is what has kept this going.  And you have no care for who drag through the mud with you.  At this point you mat never be able to shake me.  You know what you have done.  You know you have broken things beyond repair.  You know you have turned your back on the very messages of Komorebi.  You know you have betrayed even yourself.  You know you area coward.  Here I stand, I stand up for myself, while all you do is hide.  I hate sniveling cowards.

There can be no peace because you do not want peace.  No admit it you want me to hate you.  You see me as nothing but a toy for your own amusement.

Another question is, how long do want to keep this going?  How much spite do you have?  How lost are you in yourself?

The fact that I am getting any sort of response is what lets me know I am hitting my mark.  The fact that you would disagree with even praise, let alone dare to make death threats, tells me you are someone who can't be trusted to honest at all.

I pride myself on being open and giving my thoughts.  My opinions do not make me correct, but repeated observations stand to incline me to believe I am correct.

You do not believe in middle ground, you do not believe in apologies, you do not believe in letting things go, you do not believe in rules, laws, or regulations.  To you all that matters is yourself.

The fact that you are willing to deface even Klace's music is what tells me you have no care nor comprehension for your actions.  And I thought you claim to a degree in literature?  So disappointing that you lack the ability to take a step back.

Round and round it seems we shall go, when we stop..., only you have the key.

I'm sorry, but I don't recall for your rudeness.

Oh wait I'm out of sorries, better focus on yourself now!
No fucks left to give for those who give no fucks!

Try again sometime after some more education!

Those who feel threatened make threats
Those who are unhappy make others unhappy
Those who are irrational care not about who they hurt, nor consequences of their actions
Those who fear judgement are first to judge others

Toxic behavior is only ever endorsed or ignored by toxic supporters

Rather than be civil, they seek to shun others just cause, for they refuse to listen to reason and go off half cocked

And when you have a situation that is refused to be resolved, it will start to bleed everywhere

Even the smallest of wounds left unattended can be left to get infected, fester, and rot, and then it is everywhere.

In the initial event I apologized, they didn't care, I sought to drop it, they refused to drop it, I informed them that they are acting like the very stereotype that plagues the internet, they didn't care, they then gone out of their way to ruin the good names of several places through acts of cowardice, rather than address issues head on.  What you see is nothing more than an endless struggle because they continue to perform their actions unimpeded, claiming themselves as the victim.   Yet they are the ones going around and dragging the outside drama with them.  Forcing their way into places and positions of power just to laugh at the thought of being able to deny others access just because they feel like it.

They continue to feel threatened, because they refuse to drop it, to let it go.  Because they won't let it go, I am strung along with it.  They hold the key but they snapped it in half.

When one wonders where hate spreads from, it comes from actions, repeated senseless actions.  This induvial is only one of many I have seen over the years, of their given identity type alone, that behaves in this manner.  I have met several others online with similar dreadful interactions with such people.   I have had family accused of things that have nothing to deal with who they are.   Transgenders seem to seek to use their own identifier as a weapon, a bludgeoning weapon, to repeated smack any and all who dare to defy them, and they then sick their posses on them.   This is an act of gang violence/mentality, when their own followers do not have the ability to think for themselves.

This is also the same mentality of many a Republican, who follow and believe things they are told without question of hesitation.  It is ironic to have two opposing sides to behave in the exact same manner.  Because of that, no progress can EVER be made that has meaning.  It only ever stands to bleed further everywhere.  There is no sense of calm or control.

People only ever see and judge based on symptoms and judging things by their cover.  If both sides can't agree to a ceasefire, there will NEVER be a ceasefire.

I would rather approach things with fairness and kindness, but people seem to enjoy brutally murdering common decency.  And then go and seek to blame their own behavior on everyone else.  I've sought and asked for help to put an end to this situation for MONTHS.  But no one cares.  Because no one cares for such extended period of time.   I have no reason left to give a damn what anyone else thinks.  All you are left is a situation continuing to spiral out of control without end.  It is maddening and sickening.  And at his point it is simply being made known just how much without care or caution.  It is a vertebral river of blood.   And that is what these sorts of people seem to love and crave.

With lacking of impulse control or restraint, even my patience has been worn to shreds.  Things have progressed to a point where the damage may NEVER be able to be healed.  Such damage has their actions gone to tarnish my thoughts of many others.  This discord is their lifeblood, to create an unending drama.

ThiNgs just got eleveN percent more awNkward!

Started off awesome, then got to heavy stuff.

Stuff that most people are forever ignorant towards.

No one ever bothers to stop and ask or listen to how what they say and the way they say it and/or their actions make others feel..., and things like that tend to carry and spiral as habits form, until we ourselves become numb too.  Everyone has breaking point.  No one is willing to even understand what a breaking point is.  That lack of compassion is what upsets me the most.

It feels like this moment with Zander and Drayden could be a good CG, something to keep in mind for later.

Lack of positivity, that is a HUGE issue with the world.  Doesn't help either that the world is a confusing place that suddenly expects you to just know what to do.

Oh boy... we get a choice!!! I as myself feel taken to him, in part because a good amount of his personality matches my own.  However would MC exactly feel the same... its a toss up.  When you can't make up your mind on something, you just need to think about it differently or look at another set of variables and narrow things down.

Stress does wonders to make one go crazy...

Hrm... intresting... a shake up outside of the TV..., makes one curious as to how this will affect the cast going forwards!

Never quit, never give up hope, sometimes you just have to try things in a new way.  If it makes both you and those involved all happy, go for it.  Just have to start ignoring the rest...

OH! OHOHOH!!! I just knew it was a matter of time before you made that reference!  After all it could easily be possible that they exist in the same universe!

Damn that "fight" scene would make for a bunch of good CGs!, but would be asking too much to have them here.

OMG! I actually did that to my friend when he did that, but he was to preoccupied to flinch, though I only licked it a few times to tease him for teasing me! XD

Oh jeez you really know how to keep us on our toes and on the mat!  Whiplash!!! XD  Survival training! FT... Not lose?

Hrm... who says locks have to physical? ... But who knows what is really going on for sure...  T B C !

Quick, short, fun, hot, relaxing, fair challenge!

Would of course love to see more of this guy! <3

That is a very sweet CG! <3

I've done that in shower designs I'm not used to many a time..., it does make you jolt!

Wonder what hat tiger looks like..., but I suppose not important

FWISH!!!

Ugg... yeah... can't be certain if your referring to what I think you are..., but that "show" never delivered on its promises...

Next one... sigh skip sigh

SALMON! <3

Got to hold onto to what makes you comfortable, if you can

Ice cream is my staple dessert of choice!

I had wondered if they had forgotten!

Pasta with Hotdogs... reminds me of someone, who reminds me of me

Back to that "show" ... muffled anguished explicatives

Touch can be a good feeling!

Too good in some cases!  Oy...

With so much going on over the time f not hearing from you, I had forgotten that I have been missing you.

I only have myself to blame.

Or do you simply get satisfaction from hurting others while pretending to do your job?

How many people have you know personally who have died? Almost died? Been the victim of neglect or abuse?

How many people out there have you not met yet, that you wish you could have met?

How many people do you truly value or treasure?

In all cases was there something you could have done to help prevent it?

The answer is always yes, because the question is not asking for a guarantee.  There is ALWAYS something to be done to prevent things.

Yet many of us go forth blindly to blame others for own neglect and lack of awareness for the world around us.  Lack of consideration for the time and value we try to invest into things and into others.  Lack of respect for how our actions make others feel or how it makes us think of how we view others.

What good does it do anyone to force our will onto others just because of petty disagreements?  To refuse to let go of something and in turn to hold ourselves and others back? To refuse to listen and take heed, but rather fixate on one little thing like it is all that is important to your life?

People are dying for pointless reasons and I get he feeling that a good number of us don't care even half as much as we claim.  All because it doesn't directly impact ourselves.  What would it take for us to stop taking everything for granted or to think that we deserve things "just cause" of "xyz".  Maybe if we put more effort into those around us, we would not end up feeling so alone, sad, or bitter.

Frustrations stand to mount from feelings of negativity, and without stopping it, they will overflow in some manner small or large and ugly.  It could be something simple or large and blind to just exactly how we are making others feel.  Thus does the cycle spread and repeat.

What do you value most in life? Yourself? One person? or perhaps those who are willing to give others a chance to work things out?

Do you take responsibility for your actions?

Do you seek others for help with your issues to find peaceful solutions?

 Or do you seek to blame others for your own behavior?

Choices choices... we are always making them, even when we feel like we have no choice, for there always is a choice.

Rein in your impulses and keep a level head.  For none of us know jus how far reaching our actions could be through the years.

Minimize your regrets by seeking a way to go about things in a positive manner, for it would help things to go much more smoothly.

There is always a reason for things that happen even if not apparent at first, but without knowing the chain of events, you can only ever judge a book by its cover.

I don't know why either you even bother wasting your time on me?  Are you that bored and hopeless???  Are you that repulsive you like to shove it on others?  Are you so afraid you would take the cowards way out?  Taking the easy way rather than actually trying to deal with and resolve a problem?

You still don't get it.   You seem to only treat others like tools.  If they don't agree and bow to you, then they are your enemy.  Because that is exactly how you continue to present yourself.

It would be great and all, but since I am banned with No Reason Provided what so ever I cannot join.

Now if you yourself feel it best for me not to join, please do say so.

The ongoing issues are nothing shy of refusal to act like an actual human being, all over a petty disagreement of which I tried to drop, but Azzy refused to let go of, and still does.  To this point they have shown blind disdain that has lead to them even having a dislike for you yourself somehow despite being in your server.

Part of rules in many servers are to not bring in outside drama, yet Azzy has REPEATEDLY forced their way into a Mod position and VIOLATED it.

If one wonders why or how certain feelings or images towards things develop, you have a shining example right here on how to create an endless loop by might makes right mentality.

3385!  Simple but fun! the Music really helps! ^^

I see you like Dragonites!