Insert {player name} instead of MC
MC: " You stomped on "his"->("her") foot - (Sunday later that evening 2:00am)
MC: You can't let "him"->(her") take this from you. Talking about the girl with the knife in the basement
You still have the part of planning to go tomorrow after actually going back to factory. Which is jarring when it cuts back to being at the apartment and jumping right into the sex scene that should have played after the fade to black but gets interrupted.
I'm going stop here as only some of the surface level stuff got cleaned up from last time. I'm glad you're working on it, and I was looking forward to more of an in between of what was the older version and now. I'll come back when a new version comes out.
REDzelda1001
Recent community posts
While I am a 100% cis male, I checked, partially with this game, I very much enjoyed the story telling aspect of both sides of this game. It feels well written and human in it's expectations of what real teens would be expected to react in a strange situation like this. Especially the kind of people today that are more open while you still have the people that most definitely are not, and take pleasure in letting you as a player know you aren't welcome if you don't conform. I would love to see a future edition of the game that has a full genital transition and how the player and the world around them will deal with that.
All in all it has been very informative to see things from a different perspective.
Thank you.
Before all that,I noticed about 5 minutes into the game that I'm pretty sure you're using an AI LLM to generate the speech, and an older one based on the amount of em dashes that are present in the text. Seems like that is your priority number one to fix is you need to write the script or the game will not go anywhere.
First thing is that the game boots in Russian and the language change is nice that it's on the main screen in the yellow box. But not all the text has been translated. On both Diana's and Mark's Social page, their 3 bars, looks like love, friendship, lust are all in Russian still, along with the text at the bottom of their social page. If you are on the SociALL page and you scroll down on a photo it will enlarge it even if you are at the top of the page. The hold text between messages is also still in Russian. When notifications pop up at the top of the screen, it would be a nice QoL to be able to click them and head to that chat, currently it doesn't do that. When you pick "Don't Send" as an option, usually you just wouldn't have a speech bubble.
I gotta say, I kinda like the look of the characters. They have an early 90's sci fi fantasy anime vibe to them. Angled chin, man-eater, fem fatalle FMC and a very pretty boy russian Antagonist/Friend. Even though the MC looks like the angel demon from Chainsaw Man. They are all interesting looking.
There seems to be a decent amount of dead time between sent and received texts even on 3x speed.
Finished in around 20minutes on 3x speed for 1/2 of it.
In between animations and any other scene that isn't the basic ones just aren't loading the the still frames. I've downloaded from multiple websites and tried to uninstall reinstall the game 3 times. Even went into the scene viewer and the same problems were happening.
Edit: I fixed it. I had it one extra folder deep from my other porn games.It probably wasn't sourcing the images from the correct source because it was one layer too deep from other Renpy assets.
The music, the art, the story as short as it is so far, the thought placed into each corner. It screams quality. The black and white color palate actually escalates it rather than diminishes. That soft jazz was so nice on such a diabeticly sweet journey. Bless the minds that came up with this. More please.
I know this is a bit of a long comment, but I really love the premise of this game, and it feels real and like it's coming from a place of experience. I'm sure a lot of us COVID people can relate the the feeling of listlessness. I'm excited to see how the game develops.
In the NSFW scene at the beginning it would be nice if the actresses lines were in quotes so it is easier to tell it apart from the rest of the scene. You could also either create more windows with just her speech or have a line break between it and descriptions.
Right as you head outside it would be nice if the description of sunlight hitting my face either had an image to depict it where it is brighter or at least have the next scene be a bit lighter where it doesn't look like it's night time at the abandoned building. It looks like we're going from a dark room, "sunlight" dark streets.
Loving the quantity of image transitions for dialogue. Some seem a bit weird for a first time meeting where she's holding open her jacket for dialogue that doesn't seem to match the vibe. Afterwards when she is doing it to show pride it makes a lot more sense.
When Cynthia says "For what it's worth today didn't feel like wasted time it felt real." To me it feels like it should be the MC saying that to her in that context.
After the altercation it seems like Cynthia is shaken up, says it might be a while, then it seems like they are about to head out that day to explore more, then they talk as if they shouldn't do it that day, yet the day stays the same and we head in just glossing over the "when you're ready" part.
Also when the option to go to the club is presented it isn't clear if MC is going to offer for them both to go there or if he's just going to go there to clear his own head without her.
It seems like some of the dialogue is out of place here because after you get back from exploring and finishing the 17 locations the next scene is preparing to explore tomorrow, end of scene it picks up from after the kiss from 2 scenes ago as if you had just finished the exploration.
The audio matches really well to what is happening in each panel, sometimes switching between each panel out of 3. Felt really immersive. Some of the dialogue felt a little weird and stilted. A little too descriptive for something that is clearly happening in front of the MC. Like Cynthia describes her nipples as both hard and sensitive twice with only 1 line in-between them. The rest just feels more at home in erotica than in semi-natural dialogue. Having some of the "voiced" lines be more internal voice of the MC might keep it more grounded.
First I love the art style and the theme of the game. Magic world but away from established IP and more of what could be explored. My issue is with the quests. It feels like every single quest is start at person 1, they need person 3 who needs a book from person 2 who needs to unlock the book, so they use person 4 then you return to person 1. I'm a fast reader and love the dialogue that exists in the game. But it feels like every quest is a fetch quest with 2 extra dialogue steps in the middle. I like the addition of the mini games and would love if those could be used to solve more problems with less steps. If this isn't an option, or not where you're thinking of taking your games vision I think having some more dialogue choices that aren't tied to the personality meter of the character. Or if they are all tied to them, having them affect the meter less individually. Both of these options would break up the flow of the game and keep players more invested in this story line rather than the game seeming to blend together at some points.
I have also noticed that in normal dialogue characters will use the names that the player has given to both themselves and any other named character, no spoilers. But in "cutscenes" they revert to using "Hero" or the other default names.
A QoL feature I'd love to see for the map minigame is maybe a map grid to kind of see how far each path goes instead of guessing how much distance it has actually covered. Whether a line is 3 or 4 squares long was confusing at times.
I have noticed the same thing. Any card that you need to pick a card to discard to burn a card, even a random card, do nothing. They cost mana and provide no positive or negative effect. I also noticed that when you want to draw more cards, the pile won't shuffle and draw more, it just won't draw you any more cards.
On the topic of the card game though I found it a bit under balanced. After toying around with the different full combos I found the best way to farm dust is just easy mode with 3-4 draw cards and the rest stupify. At medium difficulty you aren't getting enough of a bonus from vulnerability at only 1 turn for it to cost 2 mana. You get more damage from just 3 stupify spells. While I get the card compression factor, it just seems like the stats have been taken from STS and slightly tweaked. I think it's perfectly fine to take the ideas, but STS is balanced at exactly where it is after almost a decade of rebalancing. It just feels like the higher mana cost cards do not effect the game enough on the round they are played and almost zero effect on any round after. Some exceptions are like the damage reduction 3 cost spell. But even then it's just tied for taking damage to kill something faster.