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NoteYote

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A member registered May 24, 2023

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Thank you! We probably could have used a few more donut puns, but I'm not great at coming up with that sort of wordplay. Custom UIs and more distinctive fonts are the sort of things we'll definitely be looking into in our future projects, either individually or as a team. Not a one of us knew anything about how to use Renpy though when we started, so the priority was getting the code working at all, while our artist had a lot of spite variations to make. 

This one was a learning experience for all of us, and we're thrilled that people have liked the result.

Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it. Probably the only thing I'd liked to have added would have been slightly more distinct dialogue for the endings to distinguish a bit for players who made some of the right choices but not all of them, instead of only two endings. The month got away from us though, and it was better to have two fully finished paths.

Thanks! For a while it felt like our ambitions had gotten a bit ahead of us, especially in the number of sprite variations that we needed, but it came together in time. Since none of us have experience with this kind of project, it's very cheering to discover we've put together something that people have enjoyed. The feedback means a lot to us! 

Adorable characters, beautiful to look at, great music choices, good comedic moments leaning into the anime/manga genre conventions. Akuma is a fun blend of intimidating and dorky, and that little smile is almost unbearably cute. The side characters are only present for a little bit of screen-time each, but they all feel distinct and lovable. I wish that it had been longer, but it's a lot of fun while it lasts! 

Silly premise and the merciless mocking of the reality TV format is entertaining, but we don't get enough of the characters or the plot for it to feel like a complete experience. Regrettably, it doesn't last long enough for more than a hint at the characters and the plot. Some good potential here, so hopefully we'll get to see more once the jam is over.

Solid entry! A few typos here and there but the writing was strong and the use of sound and music quite effective. The story has just enough humour to make its use of cosmic horror tropes and Lovecraft references fun without feeling too derivative. The characters feel distinct and have their own distinct voices. Will seemed a bit bland compared to his more colourful fiance and uncle, but that kind of works since navigating between their personalities is part of the conflict in the story.

Short but fun little story with some absolutely lovely character and background art. Everything comes together to set the perfect mood for the writing, the mall directory is fun to play around with, and Aubrie is a likeable wolf whose troubles feel grounded and believable. The story promises a quick dive into light romance and it definitely delivers.

Thanks for the kind words and feedback.

You're not wrong about the UI - this was the first time any of us had used Renpy and none of us had the programming experience or expertise to help our programmer, while on the art side of things our artist found his work cut out for him making so many sprite variations. The stuff we learned over the month will definitely allow us to be a bit more confident in future projects.

And we're thrilled that you liked our donut-making wolf!

This is a very impressive VN for having been put together in such a short period of time. Excellent use of music and sound, and a stylish visual interface that adds to the appeal and suits the feel/theme very well. It’s easy to overlook what sound can add to a story – but many of the most memorable VNs out there are the ones that make their music and sound effects an integral part of the experience. Colour is also very effectively used. The UI in the second part of the VN reminds me of the stylish interface of games like Persona 5 and helps to sell the tone and character whose perspective we see it through.  

The amount of work that’s gone into the visual effects and interface does feel a little let down by some of the background images. Stock photos with clear humans are an understandable and sometimes necessary shortcut in a project with such a tight deadline (particularly a solo project), but they create a bit of a disconnect given the love that’s been put into the UI. Along with the occasional typo, though, this is all completely understandable for a Jam project. None of the weak points are enough to drag the story down or pull the reader out of it.  

In contrast, the scenes set in Mikkel’s room are some fantastic visual storytelling. The little bit we see of his relationship with his friends does a great job investing the reader in their relationships. The characters feel like they have a history to their interactions and their friendship.  

The only real issues I see with the VN are the fact that it doesn’t tell a complete story, and the suddenness of the genre shift. When it comes to the length, the story introduces more than it can resolve in a project with such a limited size. The reader’s interest is captured, they want to know what’s happening, but the VN doesn’t last long enough to provide a satisfactory answer. It works great as a preview, less well as a complete experience.  

The genre shift and accompanying perspective shift from Mikkel to Mycroft is more awkward. A fairly common piece of writing advice when it comes to urban fantasy and horror is that if you’re telling a story where the supernatural will play a role, it’s unwise to wait too long before you make its presence known, or at least hint at its possibilities. The hints that are dropped in One More Light are ambiguous and small enough that when the perspective jumps over to Mycroft it feels downright jarring – like we’ve switched from one story to a completely different one. A few more hints or teases early on could have made the transition rewarding and satisfying instead of perplexing.  

Minor issues aside, this is a very good entry. Full stop. The story is very good. The writing is emotional and effective. The sound and music are great. The interface is thematic and innovative. When the biggest criticism a reader can give to a story is “I wish there was more of it”, by definition you’ve done an exceptional job!  

Thanks for the detailed thoughts! This is the first time anyone on the team has worked on a VN, so it’s good to get detailed feedback about what worked and what didn’t.  

The fakeout on the second day was, perhaps, not ideal… but the process of making and filling jam donuts lent itself so well to one and there wasn’t any other place in the three days where it could really fit in. I probably should have cut it, but when a hole needs to be filled with sticky goo it’s hard not to make at least some sex comparisons.

Aww, thanks! I’m glad you enjoyed it. The idea of an inexperienced wolf expanding his family business was actually the original idea – with the expanding wolf belly a joke that we all liked enough that MakoOtter ended up having to make a lot of extra sprites. When it comes to the music, we had the advantage that ForsetiFox composed it all during the Jam specifically for the project, so it was made to go well with the story from the start.  

And yeah, we can all agree that Khenbish is the best. I snuck quite a few references to characters from other VNs with culinary talents in there, and I’m glad to see at least one got noticed!

Thanks! Who wouldn't want a big wolf to make them delicious donuts? 

Thank you very much! As a group it took us a while to settle on a story concept/theme to go along with the expansion theme. The idea of a wolf baker who literally expands throughout the VN was the silliest of the ideas that were bounced around… but we all ended up wanting to do it anyway! It meant some extra programming and a lot more sprites were needed, but it came together in time.

Very cute wolf! Charming sprite work, although it would have been nice to see a bit more of him. Having not read the series that this is a side story of, I don't feel like it really stands on its own. By the time we're introduced to the titular hour the story is basically over and it concludes without explaining enough to work as a stand-alone experience. The music and sound effects are good and effective where they're used, but the fact that there's only music in a handful of places makes its appearance almost as jarring as it is atmospheric.

This feels like a project with a lot of potential and a lot of heart behind it, albeit one that would probably have benefited a lot from more time if it hadn't been made during the Jam. There are definitely some rough edges. The lack of music and a few places where the text boxes are tagged with the wrong character's name, or with a character's name when it should be the narrator's voice, stand out in particular.

That said, there's a lot to enjoy with the sprite work and CGs. Colton is a charming wolf who a reader wants to get to know better, and music or not the writing does a good job establishing the feel of the jazz club. It's quite an enjoyable read even with the editing hiccups.

A short, fun and cute story. The jam's theme wasn't very noticeable but the wolves were likeable (and recognizable). The presentation could have been improved with some music and the teasing choices (as fun as breaking the 4th wall can be) combined to make it feel a little bit unfinished. The writing is solid, though, and you did a good job with the 2nd person perspective, which can be tricky! 

A creative little story. I don't feel like it really worked in the theme as much as it could have, but as a writer who's own writing process is glacial by comparison, I find it extremely impressive that you produced something that feels this complete in such a short time!

This is a cute slice-of-life story. Likeable characters and some charming CGs. There's enough chemistry between the viewpoint and Callum for their growing friendship to feel natural. 

A fun little mystery with some colourful characters! Glad it made it in under the deadline.

A heartfelt story, well deployed CGs, and great use of music. There are some writing/editing issues but they aren't serious enough to be too distracting.