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You have just described every problem, challenge, setback and internal and external piece of criticism I've ever dealt with from the time I was a student to now in surgical precision LOL

Not sure about surgical precision. The language barrier and my newfound laziness will not allow me to achieve it.

And in the end, I am already reasoning the post -fact. In fact, I am an apostate, the same person who chose perfection in life after many years of perfectionism in work. I just closed the door and went on. Therefore, now I can calmly dissect my own and someone else's experience with a clear head. It is difficult for me to say what such an experience of a creative person leads to in the end, but an obvious bonus is a free time for studying someone else's art and even writing my unobviously demanded thoughts about it)