My bad, I misread. Was visualizing alkonosts as feathery dwarves :D.
And nah I don't see your writing as lacking or flawed. It's great. I was just thinking of what helped immerse me in previous books. Everyone's different though :)
Aww, that's nice of you to say! But if there is something I should be doing to improve my work, then I appreciate it being pointed out!! Immersion is a key aspect of good games-- and good storytelling, for that matter!
Also omg tiny alkonosts.