Hi SeaLiteral, I just left a comment on your main page about the things I really liked, but I had a couple of thoughts so I thought I'd put them over here.
In my playthrough, if I don’t trust Clara, then go to the park and see her, then we go to the inn together, I get an error message saying
Line 255 if seen_bard:
Name error: Name seenbard is not defined
I'm not great with errors but possibly you’ve set up your variables using “define” rather than “default”? I think maybe putting default seen_bard = True (before the start label) might fix this.
Also, at the inn with Clara, it might be worth to put a visual effect or line of text saying “I slip into a dream” before the dream sequence, as when I first reached that scene, it appears quite suddenly and I thought the game had accidentally jumped back to an earlier point.
Another suggestion is - it sounds like you had a disappointing experience with your proofreader, and likewise with the card game mechanic, but a new player wouldn't know about these issues, so I think it might serve the game better not to mention them at all. With the card game specifically, you could just add a line of text describing winning the game, and it wouldn't interrupt the flow of the story.
For proofreading, I didn’t spot any issues except this sentence - “I hear he blows the candle, it goes dark” which should be “ I hear him blow out the candle”, but its still understandable!
For the art, I really liked your pencil drawing - and I wonder if it might have been fun to make all the art 'traditional style', to fit in with the storybookish feel? If you bump up the contrast on some drawing like the sheep one, you could maybe create some quite nice visuals without having to go the photo editing route either.
I hope you don't mind these suggestions, and if you've already fixed anything in your new update, apologies for being slow with the comment.
PS - forgot to say in main comment, but I love the title you chose for this game! A very dreamy and evocative sounding name!
