i found my account that i hadnt used in many years just to comment on this (i was actually going to create a new one but my email was already used--)
anyway- i wanted to say, this is amazing, the characters are interesting, the scenes are fun, the plot is interesting, and the mysterious air it has is just straight up amazing
i also love the drawing style, it doesnt looks professional, but that adds to the charm and makes it much more unique than if it had
there was also a few mistakes, like addressing koko as he a few times, or phrases that didnt make much sense in the translation, but it didnt happen very often and i'd say its not bad at all
its also a bit short, but short & good is better than long for the sake of it and bad, so while i wish it was longer i understand why it might be on the shorter side
my only real complaint is that, while i get thats not the focus, i wish we could see happy endings with other choices instead of bad ends
this is gonna get very spoilery so for anyone who is yet to finish watching/playing it, dont read my past here
!!SPOILERS:!!!
in regards to the bad endings, i wish you could see more outcomes of some of them, for instance the one where koko kills miroku - i'd love to know what koko does now that she did that, would she snap, would she stuff the protagonist body with something to make him not look dead? would she harm herself?
also as a small note in regards to that - i feel like the bad ending where she kills the neighbor would be better if it wasnt straight up evil, koko is meant to be someone you'll like right? and i did, but ever since that potential scene happens where she does that, the entire rest of the journey i was like 'well, she did kill someone apparently for no reason then murdered us, is that someone i can trust' - in that case i'd prefer if the neighbor had attacked her & thats why she ends up killing the gal, maybe then she stabs you by accident, be it cause reflex or whatever, that way she would be at best a anti hero instead of a villain - tho this is a small thing and it wouldnt be needed, just..the general advice is: be careful of how you make the characters look even in potential bad ends, cause it'll affect how people judge them in all other endings too
or for when you pick the 'neither' option & you end up killed by the girl on the streets, it'd add a lot if we saw koko or her neighbor reactions to it, what they might do, etc! than simply a 'end' and thats it
alternatively, i'd love to see some alternate good endings, like you actually being helped if you choose her neighbor instead of her being killed, based on things you told or didnt before, even if it was smaller i'd like to see more good possibilities, just being killed is way less fun, plus that way people would be able to discuss which ending they like the most, their fav characters based on that, and it'd give more reason to give more scenes with them - and hell, even going bad for longer could be fun, a end where youre tortured for half of your life would be more interesting, if we're going the bad ending route
and a small thing - in regards to you (author) comment about people being bored by too much dialogue:
while its possible that too much dialogue could make it boring, i'd imagine most people who would bother to play a VN to begin with wouldnt mind that much, and those that mind wouldnt mind playing, a famous example is doki doki, where in one of the scenes you can talk with a character, it has a lot of topics about a lot of things and people love it, hell, some even made a mod that expanded that scene to go on for hours and hours, people who like VN certainly wont be complaining about dialogue, its kinda the point, its like reading a book, as long as its interesting, it can go on and on and people will love it
that being said, if you ever worry about people getting too bored, drawing more scenes can always help, be a mysterious one, a bloody one, a cool one, or even outfit changes, different scenarios, etc! your art is pretty good & fun, and with such a monster-world outside, theres a lot of potential, and you could easily make it not boring, i watched a video that was over 1hour on this and loved every second, i doubt more hours would've made me unhappy
i also wish we got to see the true forms for the spider & koko, or maybe more scenes with their traits being used
That being said, i loved this game & everything in it, my suggestions are just for how it could be made even better / future advice, what you have here is beyond amazing, i will certainly be waiting for more
im also all in for a koko sequel! koko 2 must happen! or at least a koko 1 expansion, like how DDLC did, that way we could have extra built ontop of what is already great
And by the way - i saw that you mentioned wanting people to test if things worked out & proofread - i would certainly not mind doing so, i have a lot of free time and i have a good grasp of the english language - might have to give you a follow on twitter
anyway, overall it was a really good time & kept me entertained & was a lot of fun! and sorry for the huge comment, but i wanted to give my thoughts & tell how amazed i am, and since i saw how you usually read & reply, thought this would be a great opportunity to do so!