welp
you should seriously seek help and dont make excuses because clearly you arent trying to better yourself at all
I'm not becoming goody-goody with you, but if you want someone to talk to, I will at least give you the opportunity to do that. I'm doing this out of genuine kindness, and if you don't accept it, that's fine, continue to go along the way you go. Again, I'm not asking to become friends, I'm just saying if you want a person to just listen to whatever you find to be a problem then I'll listen.
You can't even handle two days away from this site?? Was this site some sort of happy place for you?? You've already ruined it for yourself here, so why did you come back knowing the inevitable would happen? Seriously... I seriously do feel the utmost pity for you. But I can't bring myself to rage anymore, that would be stupid.