Text issues:
1. "Refuse to help the villagers" and "Refuse to help the knight" implied to me that if you did this, you couldn't try again. Maybe "Decline to (X) right now" would work better.
2. Typos (I hope it's a matter of just search/replace in the source, but if you need further details, let me know) :
briging -> bringing (when you join GalGeo)
formind -> forming
lond-dea -> long-dead
millennia -> millenia?
sizeable ->? sizable
speciality ->? specialty
warsip's -> warship's
weapory -> weaponry
werstling -> wrestling
defeated out -> defeated our
Grammar:
The cruel pirate captain is dead! You have saved the inhabitants of X from the terror of constant raids. The news spread quickly among the locals, and your fame increases! == The news spreads
In your most terrifying voice, you scream dreadful threats at the pirate. You boast to be the greatest warrior in the Galaxy, slayer of countless corsairs. You're so convincing the pirate loses the will to fight and runs away! == You boast of being
You furiously stab at the beastmaster, piercing the thick hide and dealing damage! == its thick hide
The X of X are happy to hear you're considering hunting some beasts. The wild and bloodthirsty creatures are harassing them constantly, wounding and killing many. They seem to be controlled by intelligence higher than animal. == higher than animals/other animals? a higher-than-animal intelligence?
You've got rid of many pirates, who either are dead of have deserted. The remaining pirates stay away from you. == dead or have. (Also "gotten" sounds a bit better)
You dock with the shipwreck, which is in surprisingly good shape, and go onboard to explore it. == arcane stuff: "The onboard computer" but "on board" as an adverb is 2 words.
You make one more attack and almost pin down the creature's arm The creature makes a gurgling noise and uses her last bit of strength to push back. For a moment, your arms are in balance, then the alien pins you down. == creature's arm. The
However, when you tell the mercenaries about the suppression device you obtained from the scientist, they agree to attack the slavers base with you for a non-negotiable sum of 10000 credits. == slavers'
Stylistic:
There are tooth markings on the bones of the skeleton and a golden locket around its neck. There is also a leather bag nearby, with documents that identify the unfortunate victim of the beasts as X from X. == > toothmarks (?) may be stylistic
You shoot at the very right moment, wounding the pirate captain. == just the right moment
News of your exploits has reached the alien warlord, who now is determined to put an end to this personally! == who is now
(Python helped me find some of this.)