itch.io

Here's the thoughts I gathered while reading:

I am a big fan of the Saint acknowledging that he is not perfect and that to be so would be less than ideal. I feel like that has some undertones of humanity remaining necessary, even in these robot bodies. Sort of a last revelation to a true believer before he is gone.

The opening, I felt needed a bit more work - brains can't feel pain by themselves, they can't tremble by themselves and I don't think anyone expects to find a heart in the open skull of a person. All that felt a bit weird to me.

In the prayer: Blessed be the hand that "loosens" from pain - becoming loose sort of implies that the hand has weakened and can no longer grip - maybe "the hand that eases pain" would be closer to what you intended?

I am also not sure what he intended to mean with "Better words" - is it implying he rejects the prayer, as in better words are needed?

And okay, so they have a prayer response value that can be measured - I felt like that needed some extra explanation. While reading I got the idea that it was a bad thing.