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(+1)

I'm not sure how much of what I've read so far is in which update, but reading through this 2 things really stand out that could use improvement:

1. The use of flashes is more irritating than scary. The repeated flashes at the title card especially seemed pointless, in that they didn't seem to be expressing anything within the story.

2. There's a lot of misinformation in this story. It's true that fiction will always have some, because researching everything is impossible and not worth it, but it's still a good idea to at least look up any trivia about popular topics or important plot points. For example, it's probably fine that a mention of Faust is immediately tied to Goethe, since it's reasonable for the characters themselves to not know about Marlowe or the puppet show versions. However, claiming that 5 Nights at Freddy's would be banned in Japan for child murder is downright strange, and moments like the lawyer not showing anyone the will (which is almost universally a criminal offense) and the mention of "reinstating citizenship" left me wondering what sort of setting the story was supposed to be taking place in.

Thanks for commenting! I hope you don't mind me defending the game a little bit.

1. The difficult thing about these early story-driven VNs is that most of the components won't make sense until later in the game. Flashes, sure I'll give you that, don't make sense in the setting yet. A lot of the stranger elements early on are intentionally set up without immediate context because the story is built around delayed payoffs and reinterpretations. What doesn't make sense now, either stylistically or metaphorically, will only make sense later once the broader picture becomes clearer. 

That said, it is still a fair criticism, even if it's something intentional for the long-term. Flashing imagery has become very common in this market, so I understand where the irritation comes from. But in this case, these elements do tie directly into later plot points, so I can't dismiss them quite yet. 

2. Sure, fiction cannot solve all those inconsistencies, but I'm also not promoting the game as a completely fact-driven story either. I mean, there are no trains from Seoul to Japan, wills are to be given out to beneficiaries after death, and there is no such thing as a nationwide Flunk program instated throughout all of Japan. The world isn't meant to function as a perfect mirror of reality.

Obviously that doesn't mean hiding behind the wall of "oh it's fiction" makes it okay and excuses everything. I do a lot of heavy research on topics for that reason, as evident from the Faust/Goethe scene and several others (I learned a lot about Japanese dodgeball and how weird it is just for that one scene). I do care about authenticity and accuracy where it matters, but sometimes it is necessary to bend reality slightly for the sake of narration or thematic intent. 

Sorry for the essay. Thanks for playing! (: