Played only the Steam Demo (somehow completed a run with Lena, or so Steam says???) and these are my observations:
- The pacing is very difficult from the beginning of the game. Could do with a reduction of half or 2/3 of the current dialogue lines, to improve flow and user engagement. Until Remi fell the game felt like it was going nowhere. There seems to be a lack of economy of meaning when it comes to the vast amounts of walls o' text coming your way.
- Only Eryn seemed ready for yiffing because you spend so much time around her, narrative wise the others felt too emotionally and socially distant - and conversely gave off NAFF vibes, boner willets for Lucine notwithstanding. Perhaps it's just me.
- Was not sure what to do, it seemed more like an 80s/90s era gamebook dangerously edging (ha ha) on being pulp quality. with very little (oh, how very little) to keep a player/reader engaged. Maybe a tutorial at the start explaining how the game works - for instance I did not learn that there was a "hidden object minigame" to start off with until I re-read the demo description.
- A lot of the choices and decisions you make don't seem to feel impactful or significant like in real life. This needs to be changed.
I was mostly turned off by this game. Even Wildermyth with any of Stanfreed's mods installed feels so much more powerful, interesting and impactful than whatever this was (and it can be far more erotically charged even with the near-lack of n00dity that Wildermyth is known for). Even Dispatch does a better job of it - even though given the acolades it's received it's unfair of me to compare this with Dispatch.
Otherwise, prepare to compete with the INTERWEBZ which can provide whatever else this game had to offer AT NO COST. This game has the same quality of life that making love Asian-style is known for - two minutes and you're done, and not feeling any better for it.
Thanks, this is very useful feedback. I'd be extremely curious to hear your thoughts on the prologue rewrite and expansion so far since most of what you're talking about has been the primary focus for the past few updates. After releasing the last Steam demo I've been focusing on improving flow in the early story by cutting as much unmotivated dialogue as possible, improving pacing, showing clearer character motivations, and adding a new choice system that's based on heuristics with no clear right or wrong answers. We've also added in a lot more near nudity type scenes and paced them to ramp up the tension and eroticism on the romance paths, and we heavily expanded and reflowed the sex scenes. Still haven't gotten around to making a proper guide or tutorial yet but that's planned for when the story crystallizes.
Have you ever played Wildermyth - at least the pre-Omenroad campaigns - or picked up the Lone Wolf series by Joe Dever? I think you should. You may find a few insights or more about how best to approach the pacing of your game. Especially with how Pyre and its surrounds are designed or explained to the player. The best part about Dever's work is that most of it is available for free at Project Aon online and it won't cost you money, only time. Greanted this is mostly SFW-ish stuff (unless you bolt on Stanfreed's Spicy Events mod to your version of Wildermyth) but I think it is time well spent on your end and for the future of Refuge of Embers.
It's clear this was a work of love and that it has potential, this game you're making. Please don't squander it and all your hard work. On the other hand if you need a reviewer or a copy editor and translator .....