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(8 edits) (+1)

Hello architect of this spooky asylum. I only just started investigating and the atmosphere has already thoroughly go me creeped out. (In a good way.)

-----------------------------------------------------------

I found some errors:

--> Just entering the Foyer:

"You are the foyer of the asylum. " ->  in the foyer

--> After running away from the spectral woman:

" If you can free the ghost, maybe you can free youself?" -> yourself

--> In the library, looking closer at the portrait of the woman:

Error: cannot find a closing tag for macro <<first>>

You take a closer look at the painting of the woman in the gown, trying to work out what's wrong with it. The painted silk is covered in patterns, flowers, or circles or …

Eyes! Her gown is covered in eyes, all staring out of the canvas straight at you!

You tentatively rub the surface of the painting, hoping that it's just some sort of visual trick, but the eyes only get clearer. Who would paint this? A patient? The signature in the bottom corner is almost impossible to read, but you think it says Emily — something.

Error: child tag <<finally>> was found outside of a call to its parent macro <<first>>

The eyes stare at you from the faded canvas, just like before. You feel that the whole house is watching you.

Error: cannot find a closing tag for macro <<first>>

--> Looking at the boxes of papers in the Library:

"You assume that the shelves here were once neatly stacked files" -> stacked with files

--> The advertising flyers:

"... a stylized design that looks a little a glowing sun..." -> "looks like a little glowing sun" or "looks a little like a glowing sun"

--> Searching the papers on the floor of the office:

"a faded photograph papercliped to the edge of a page." -> paperclipped

--> Clicking on [Leaf through the old man's file] from Beau Russel's file takes me to the boy Martin Green's file instead.

--> Phew! I feel much safer now that I found myself a towel.

--> Examining the chair in the furnished room upstairs.

There doesn't seem to be anything special about this chair. It was painted white once, but the paint has flaked away to reveal the old brittle wood underneath. You wouldn't trust your weight to it.

It has been placed facing the locked and shuttered window, as if someone often sat staring out of here.

They must have wanted out of this place so badly …

Error: cannot find a closing tag for HTML <p>

You check the seat in case someone hid some letters there, but there's nothing to find.


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Back to heart-shriveling exploration...

(+2)

My lord! 3 weeks of testing and half a dozen testers and look what you’ve found!

None of those sound game breaking, so they’ll have to wait till after the contest for me to fix them.

(+1)

None are game-breaking, and none are diminishing my enjoyment of your game. 

I'm deep in this horror atmosphere asylum you've crafted!

(11 edits) (+2)

Hi again! I'm back for another dive into the tense and panicked atmosphere of the asylum. So glad that teddy bear didn't eat me...

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--> Looking closer at the teddy bear:

"Probably a well-loved." -> doesn't need the a .

--> In Lola's room:

" Once, the walls were papered with some sort of ornate flower pattern, but the walls are dark with damp and mold." -> No error per se, but the repetition of "the walls" grates a bit. Why not "...but now they are dark..." ?

-->Clicking on the cigarette case in my inventory:

"Monogramed 'Beau Russel' " -> monogrammed

--> On the staff floor landing:

"Old doors hang open, giving on to the little narrow rooms..." -> I think this should be one word: onto

--> Immediately after taking the diamonds:

You rush back up the stairs, through the library, and back to the foyer, waiting for the shoe to drop, but it seems Morben was as good as his word. The front door stands slightly open, and nothing stops you running outside.

It is pitch black. Cold, heavy rain pours from the night sky. It must be well past midnight.

Error: cannot execute macro <<p>>: unable to parse macro argument ""Who cares? You": unterminated double quoted string

 aren't going to have to worry about getting up for work ever again!

--> Waking up in the hospital:

"The Doctor's have no real explanation for why you are there," -> Doctors

--> I got ending 5: "Greed beats Charity". But underneath the afterword it says:

Endings Collected

  • 4: Lost to the device

--> When I'm in the Control Booth, the name of the save-file is still "Basement Corridor". That's confusing for when I should want to return to this  choice.

--> I'm very impressed with how you balance this whole game. The panic creeping up with enough triggers to bring it back down a notch. The new weapon appearing just as I lost my second-to-last one, the bottlenecks opening up after the right amount of exploration... Well crafted!

--> I destroyed the Machine! And then I got this message in the Afterword:

Endings Collected

  • 4: Lost to the device 
  • 6: Error: <<=>>: bad evaluation: Cannot read properties of undefined (reading 'name')

Both of these are wrong:

- I never got ending 4 "Lost to the Device", I got 5 "Greed beats Charity"

-Aside from the error message, my final ending was not 6, but this one:

This is ending 7 of 7

“An end to this horror”

--> I just went back to an earlier save to verify the name of my ending for my previous comment. Clicking through to Credits and the Afterword now gives me this:

Endings Collected

  • 4: Lost to the device
  • 6: Error: <<=>>: bad evaluation: Cannot read properties of undefined (reading 'name')
  • 6: Error: <<=>>: bad evaluation: Cannot read properties of undefined (reading 'name')

--> Of course I had to go in one last time to confirm my suspicions... And indeed, the endings just keep stacking:

Endings Collected

  • 4: Lost to the device
  • 6: Error: <<=>>: bad evaluation: Cannot read properties of undefined (reading 'name')
  • 6: Error: <<=>>: bad evaluation: Cannot read properties of undefined (reading 'name')
  • 6: Error: <<=>>: bad evaluation: Cannot read properties of undefined (reading 'name')

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lots of progress. Heading further upstairs now! If I don't come back, come find my ghost. You'll be able to appease it with John Coltrane.

One ending done. I'll go back to do the more heroic thing: leave the diamonds, stay in the house, and try to save the rest of the patients.

Finished.

Thanks for a great game!

(+1)

I’m making a list of all the errors!

Next time I’ll employ you as a tester :D

Review is up:

Rovarsson Licks Ectoplasm - Competitions - The Interactive Fiction Community Forum


Have fun being spooked by the rest of the EctoComp entries!

Best wishes,

Rovarsson