You really cannot expect an indy dev to have the same reasources as a business. More often than not they are very small teams and sometimes, especially in the visual novel world, just one person.
In these cases your money is not supporting a *business* it is supporting *people*.
So again I'm going to reiterate, they do not have the same resources to continue a project in the face of personal hardships. People can be shady about it, yeah, but calling having to make the choice to open up to talk about why they've slowed down or gone on hiatus or dropping a project "whining" is disrespectful. To the people having to make that choice, to the things they've had to deal with.
Because you keep mentioning specific projects, I feel like maybe you've been let down by a dev or project and take it personally. I'm sorry that's something you dealt with, but I find that painting everyone else with the same brush is kind of callous and unkinnd.