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This has got to be the greatest achievement of my lifetime. Even the birth of my child or winning 2nd place in the All State Meatball Sub cook out pales in comparison to this. 

I really did not expect to be able to beat it once I saw QWOP controls. Good humor writing as well.

This is the greatest praise I have ever, and likely will ever, receive in my life. 2nd place All-State Meatball is no damn joke. Thank you for the kind words, really nice to hear you had some fun with it!