Hey, thanks so much for the review!
I totally agree with you, a lot of the dialogue could really use a rewrite. English isn’t my first language, and while I think my grammar has improved quite a bit over the course of the project, there are still plenty of awkward lines and mistakes, especially in the earlier parts of the game.
Right now, alongside working on Inanna Revenge, I’m also spending a bit of my free time translating AlwaysFan into French. It was originally supposed to just be a straight translation, but as I went through the English script again, I noticed a bunch of issues I couldn't ignore, so I’ve also started fixing and polishing the English text as I go. I’m not promising I’ll do it for the entire game, that would take way too long, but whenever I spot something that clearly needs fixing, I’ll definitely clean it up. I’m planning to release a patch (hopefully around the 1.0 anniversary in early August) that will clean up a lot of the writing.
As for the rest of your review: I’m really glad you enjoyed the game and the characters! This was indeed kind of a "trial run" for me, a way to learn the ropes with Ren'Py and Honey Select, and despite the rough edges, I’m still pretty proud of how it turned out.