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(2 edits) (+2)(-3)

Okay I loved playing this game. It's a total mystery and well written. I'm honestly surprised that the game is soo good, but also hidden, like I found this in a collection. Maybe if you add the historical/medival tag you'll find some more popularity.

Despite the obvious general lagginess, needs new sprites (like when Maverick was in his ball attire, and Mc was going off on how polished he looked... but he was still in his stuffy uniform). 

I think adding a skip button would be helpful, as ngl repeating the same dialogue again and again it's a bit boring. And unlike the game 'Ambition; a minute in power', the game doesn't do a gamble on what the result of your choice will be. And it's gonna be hard to see where the difference of choices will have when playing the game.

not to be rude but....I genuinely don't know what the heck's up with the stat system. The book mini game is broken no matter how many books I pickup the stats don't work. The fan mini game is fucked, I hate it, like sometimes these bald white head mfs don't move or take ages to move. The talking mini game is a bit confusing (but actually not that bad reminds me of Tears of Themis)... The fish mini game although I also love Stardew valley but this is a cheap knock off, like make smt original. Although I appreciate the newness of the mini games to the world of VNs. This is like ... trash, like so bad. 

What I mean by appreciating the newness is that, I can't think of a otome VN ,from the top of my head that has these mini games. While writing this I remember of 'your turn to die' and how that game implemented mini games. Where the mini games were suited for the situation. 

This game... I feel like it would be better to get rid of the mini games altogether.

This game is a game of strategy and I assume the stats are going to be used to unlock certain dialogue, and make right choices. This means that players are going to load the game section till they reach the require amount of stats. And with the horrible horrible save and load section is going to be excruciatingly painful, to do that. 

Plus the mini games that the player does in the beginning is useless these stats don't transfer to the game at all. 

And those weird ass breaks in the game where the players can play the mini game. FUCK THAT SHIT. I click on a random baldie and it's the fucking book mini game, where I know despite fuck all the book I collect I will remain a stupid, uncharismatic, sick girl

(btw I appreciate the mini games, like I won't lie they were fun. and well made. Like chibi MC is SOOOOO CUTE.  But I hate them in the main game... sorry... not sorry). Maybe you guys could do a challenge route with the mini games

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But then again... idk while typing this out I keep comparing the game to 'seven kingdoms:a princess' problem'. A complex stats based , political otome game. I think the overall blueprints of the game are somewhat similar where the Mc's are thrown into a strange high-stakes world and have to build relationships and skills to survive. Although that game has some huge customisation, with it having a build a Mc section, the game overall is good to take inspiration from. 

Look while playing the game I felt uncertainty with every choice, with some being both a personality choice and a plot choice. I felt like walking on a tight rope, and the reactions from the charaters' were a bit... hmm not helping. I just felt lost, with no way to track my progress with each character and heck a sense of direction.  That made the game unsatisfying to play. 

Although Cassius' horrifying expressions were quite funny.

Also I suppose I don't get 'playing as the og villainess' as like didn't the og villainess get her head chopped off from acting like herself, why on earth would our player choose to act like her. 

Truthfully I think the game is too broad for the demo, the satisfying result of seeing that your choices truly do matter is nowhere in the demo, which is weird being that collectively all your choices should have some sort of a result.


Again while writing this I'm reminded of the masterpiece of what is 'death is the only end for the villainess'. Who's in a similar position to our Mc. But then again her mission is only to survive.  AUDHIOHFEHh.

....

truthfully I have no idea where this game is going to go. Thinking about it is kinda infuriating. I haven't played a game where the stakes matter but you don't know what happens and you don't see the result of your choices lead to.

....

maybe that the point though... as you're the mc walking through the world, knowing that you execution is in X amount of days and if you don't change or worse make the wrong move you'll reach that ending sooner.

... idk I can't directly compare this game to any others I played before... maybe  'absolution:the way the lost', Anoldor, in that if you make one choice you'll lose out on another, eg with friendship etc. But these games had a sense of direction. I understand why the sense of being lost is there is in game, I literally typed out my thought process. But ngl 'absolution' is literally a horror game and I felt more scared and worried playing this game than that game and fuckty fucked up shit happened in that game. ( EDIT: looking back I might have been exaggerating, but idk the no sense of direction in the game really got to me).


I think including affection bars would be good for the game just for guidance and a lil notebook to write everything you've collected. E.g. events that you've signed up for and info you know about characters.

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Charaters wise hmm in the demo no character stood out. We didn't get to see the whole range of personality nor feel out who they are. Maverick is honestly the best as he's not a total asshole to Mc, especially when she changes. And does speak some sense. 

However I think I can just blame it on the overall shortness of the game, however I do see potential in each character. 

Cassian and his carrot boy Esra need a good slap in the face. However I kinda get why they're acting like such brats as Mc's former self was probs a bitch to them for many many many years and Mc can't absolve herself from her past sins that easily. I mean Maverick's her step bro sooo it would make sense that he'd be more accepting. 

... though seeing how the boys 'might be' LI's in the game is 'interesting', I wonder how they'll fall for our Mc.

Hermes and Isidora are actually a fresh breeze compare to all the other characters in the game. Being that they don't have the same history Mc has with the golden trio. 

Hermes and Mc could have an 'interesting dynamic'. As funnily enough he's also a villain, with similar ideas as our Mc one had.

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overall this game has great great potential however the setup of the game is ... shit. Like it's a VN but no skip button and RPG save files. Girl bffr. But the art is amazing. I'm gonna keep an eye on this game, hopefully an extended demo will come out and blow my mind away.


RIP I just rambled, sos if it all really didn't make sense

(+3)

Heyo! Thanks for checking out our game and giving feedback :DDD

I think an important trend in this to clarify though (and trust I'll add this to the game page so no one else falls under the wrong assumption) is the context behind this base "demo" (I know demo is a bit of a strong word as you'll soon see).

This game was made during a school club game jam event where both experienced and absolute beginner developers were placed on teams and given part of the school year to develop these game pitches before a final presentation deadline. As such, what we have out now is less of a "get the full experience" demo and more of just a "this is what we could crank out during finals week" demo haha!

This includes writing (more choice variations, choices, scenes, interactions, gameplay explanations), art (sprites, backgrounds, settings), ui/ux (we actually have a notebook that will help track several things drafted up! great minds think alike), sound (if you hear a messy ambiance loop I am probably the guilty offender :0), and of course, programming! (ex. the stats are placeholder proof of concept and don't actually work). I know some portions can seem pretty jank right now (trust me, the minigame and 'random' blank scenes between vn segments will be WILDLY different once we get all that work done) but hopefully our closer intended demo build will provide a much more enjoyable experience once the necessary assets for the gameplay loop are finished, both as a visual novel and a stats management game. (Btw, Volcano Princess is also a big inspiration for mixing stats and visual novel segments!)

I of course can't make any promises on the exact timeline or order of things as this game is continuing past its game jam origins as a passion project of a bunch of uni students, but I can say that there are both things finished, just not published, and things being worked on that tackle exactly the points you bring up! Our programmers have been really amazing (Most of them learning Godot just for the game and practicing their experience with minigames and building the vn system from the ground up) and have been focusing on fixing more behind the scenes code, but hopefully once we're back to work after break and posting more content-oriented updates, you'll see just how awesome they are at making games that make sense with the environment ;D. Plus, as an avid Ren'Py shill I will not rest until we get all the features that'll make the vn play as smooth as butter!

TLDR; Dw!! We got you and this is DEFINITELY not a reflection of the gameplay experience, but I will make sure to update our page so that this a lot more clearer to potential players! Tysm for giving us such detailed feedback, (I can tell just from the sheer amount of properties you compared alone that you put a lot of thought into this comment) and I hope that eventually down the line, we'll be able to really show off a TRUE VxR demo with all the fixings! <3333

(3 edits) (-3)

OMG you're so kind and knowing that this was released as a school project ... makes sense. Not in a bad way, it just that I get it because I'm gonna be studying computer science next year and I know bits and bobs about the course work process. 

So despite my hatred towards the mini games, like I still do believe that the mini games are ... bad,. But I do appreciate the effort put into it, and if the mini games were a separate entity to themselves and properly worked. They're quite good and enjoyable. 


Like I'm brash with my way of speech, but I geinuenly am speaking from the heart and I don't mean to offend the team in any way. It's just that this game is the combination of my passions, like I love villainess manuhas, I been there since the beginning and I love visual novels and especially romance. And ngl I'm a self proclaimed know it all when it comes to these genre's

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SO since I'm the queen of Yapping, and I have all the time in the world so I'm gonna yap some more.

Yeah back to my statement of saying 'I've never played a game like this before', and knowing that you drew inspiration form 'volcano princess' it makes sense why I haven't. I have to ask, although this is a passion project, with a team as somewhat large as u have (13 people), I do think it would be a waste if u can't somewhat make a profit of the game. ( I mean I'm kinda shooting myself in the foot here, because I'm no billionaire and heck who wouldn't want a free game but still). With this in mind what type of player are you looking for. Because by all means this game is and tagged as a  visual novel. Which it is but not. 

I mean the game is a visual novel doesn't play out like a visual novel. I don't mean to be rude but it's so obvious that you guys don't play otome games. I've stalked your profiles (ik I'm insane), NONE OF U HAVE MADE A VISUAL NOVEL PRIOR TO THIS, (I guess expect LemonInk, as you've helped with moth to a match stick {which has it's flaws but is overall an nice game}). but then lowkey it does seem like these accounts are you're professional accounts... (I'm not that insane). But anyways, this is gonna sound similar to my previous rant but with more clarity. 

One there hasn't been a game where the stakes this high, with a canon self-insert player, with a large variety of choices, and pathways to go. Oh aswell as that 1/4 of the games cast (including the Mc's Dad) absolutely hates the Mc. Like despises' her and treats her like dogshit AND THEY'RE NOT TSUNDERE'S.

Visual novels follow a flow diagram, you pick a choice that'll affect the dialogue and that choice might be brought up later on and effect the game. Funnily enough this game has wilddddd variety of choice, and reading your previous comments I get the idea where you guys are coming from. You know what type of villainess are u gonna be, (a smartie pant know it all - aria from Villainess turns the hourglass), (a sweetie pie- shruli from the step-mothers marchen), or a pathetic little slob (rubekia -I'm sorry for the description, like Ik she has trauma but for the point- from how to get my husband on my side). But with this type of game play it would be well odd. I mean I could be begging at one moment and cusisng a bitch out the next (-lololol me irl). Also being that the cast are close to each other and multiple characters will have a response if the Mc is rude to one. E.g siblings, friends etc etc.  And not to forget a sharp blade that awaits her execution. 

Also thinking about this game I have to ask is romance a central part of the plot or is it only a subplot. Because in the ER it seems to be a subplot. With the main aim of the game is for Mc to survive... But then that's not a Otome game


Like this game (when thinking about the minigames) plays like a money sucki- I mean mobile Otome game, e.g. Ikemen series, Tears Of Thermis and Isekai slow life ( don't ask me why I played that game). But story wise those games don't have much options, like they have different choices which only consequence is the dialogue right after and in the cause of Ikemen series there's a point system and depending on what choices you pick will give you two versions of the endings, dramatic or romantic. Both good endings btw.

However this game is different being that Mc has an execution to attend if she doesn't do something to change her ways.


I believe, with this type of game you should slim down the number of choices available or make them more subtle in a way.  

Actually, I think this is important to note to keep in mind. Why I'm saying to slim down the amount of choices. It's because this game is complicated. Our life has a shit ton of choices, but the concequences are slim. Like the Mc from 'our life' aren't getting executed, at worse they're getting scolded by one of the milfs, This game however has pseudo-poltics and life and death situations, where the Mc is trying to gain power/allies. Having this many choices will lead to many many many many many routes and it'll just become a mess. 

That being said there have been games that have done this, e.g. by incorporating a shit ton of choices, in a pseudo politics games. These games are 'Long live the queen' by Hanako Games (haven't played), Palais de Reine (haven't played a wouldn't, because the game has a virus in it) and 'seven kingdoms a princess' problem'. While I haven't played the first two games, so I can't talk much about them I have played the 'seven kingdoms a princess' problems'. This game has a SHIT TON of options, of how a character can react to situations they're in, which affects their personality and the Mc can die, in many ways. It's a beautiful game, and you should give it a try even if it's just the demo. 

....

That game took 10 years to make. Being that there was only 1 dev. 

Ngl I don't believe that this game is going to be as complex and heavy as 7KPP, but potentially it can be. (edit... maybe I'm overthinking).

It's honestly funny how you guys aren't aware of this. 

....


On one hand I'm like throw the game out, it's flawed to the core, and too much for any of u guys to handle since none of you guys have made a visual novel and only made small simple games. However the writing is good; tension is there, potentially good characterisation is there, etc  but it's built on a wonky structure and will fall.

However on the other hand I see the potential of what this game can be. (for context I'm bed-rotting playing VN's this summer holiday and so I have all the time in the world to care about this). 


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My advice to you, 

  1. is that you guys got to play otome games. If you guys do ignore this but games such as     remnant-of-the-fallen ,daughter-of-a-scoundrelEbon Light by Underbliss - itch.ioitch.iohttps://underbliss.itch.io › Games › Visual Novel ›        Free, cinderella phenomenon, Amnesia Memories (especially ukyos route), etc etc. Fuck even play the dumpster fire of which is OZMAFIA. Just play otome games,.

  1. Then make a visual novel. Like get the team together a make a small VN, about fuck all, it can be private or whatever. But you need to get your head around what makes a visual novel a VN, and otome and otome. Don't make it complicated, because when you rush you get into situations like this. But just do it, because this game doesn't feel like you guys play otome games, but rather read a shit ton of villainess manhuas

  1. Then this is the most important step, become a teenage girl. Get into the mentality of an angsty teenage girl. Because that's your audience..... I'm sorry but it is.  If you undertsnad the teenage girl you'll understand the otome genre. 

Lastly start from scratch, think about what game is it. Like think carefully and redo it completely. 

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If you were to ask what I would do if I was stuck in your position. 

I would first make a little pet character, who was sent my 'god',  to help guide the Mc  and cuss out the LI's with them. Examples of beings are Jasper from 'seven kingdoms a princess' problem' (in a world where everyone is lying to each other the Mc can 10000% trust Jasper, because although he may think poorly of Mc, he's unaffiliated with the politics on the island and provides support), The maid from Ambition a minute in power (when the Mc was seemingly abandoned by her fiancé to live in a dingy mansion, she was there to provide not only emotional support but is willing to clean up a crime scene for Mc),  and that Orion from Amnesia Memories.(he's the closest example for my spin off the game, but he's like a pixie and he's stuck with Mc too essentially try to remember her past memories so he can leave).

Also from villainess Manhwa's Yona from Beware The Villainess, the maid from Miss not-so sidekick. 

 I think having an support character who the Mc can depend on is great, in making the game seem not so daunting, and lessen the horror side, and bring players satifaction of having someone to be able to vent to, while the player endures the harsh reality Mc's in. Also to give the player an overall plan for what to do, e.g. stash enough money in the safe so they can escape.

Next I would kinda arrange the system to be more simpler, being that there's a prologue of some sort where the character customisation could happen. Like the player could pick whatever the choices they want and that'll trap them into a route. E.g pathetic route, smartie pants route, etc. Which locks the player to a smaller amount of choices, and events which only that type of villainess can access. etc, and the game will continue from there.

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Here's me going off another tangent, but with that being said I'm proven that I am the Yaping Queen. Although messy, I do hope you consider my advi- yapping, I mean looking back it's kinda harsh but take what you want out of it. I don't hate you guys and I wish the best for you and the development for this game.











GAMES THAT I REC PLAYING

hero's journey- emrys route (love this game and even still remember his name. He hates hates Mc because SPOILERS Mc used to be a wacko psycho before amnesia. But he deep down falls for her after he learns about her amnesia. 


Amnesia memories- that game is a classic, and ngl you really only need to play Kents route. Like him and Mc were having some relationship problems and then Mc got anmesia and fixes everything.


7KPP, a must play. It's confusing at first but first don't play with a guide, that game is made to be replayed to infinity. 


A knights dilemma - I liked how this game although short grapples with politics.


(+3)

bro we did NOT order a yappuccino ...

(+3)

Sorry i was creepily stalking other comments and i feel compelled to point out that in the desc this game is supposed to be subversion or even a critique of otome/villainess stuff so why would you actively try to make it like one (e.g. include a sidekick for the villainess - while i understand it's to make the game less intimidating i suppose realistically the villainess would have no real friends). Also even if it's obvi that this is everyone's first vn it's not a crime to be an amateur and everyones gotta start somewhere. big love and u dont need to sound condescending/patronizing when u give critiques next time!