Skip to main content

Indie game storeFree gamesFun gamesHorror games
Game developmentAssetsComics
SalesBundles
Jobs
TagsGame Engines
(+2)

So first let me just say that what i have read of the story line is interesting.  Somehow I managed to make it to the end of the first route I tried (normal ending 4 was what i was told it was called) and I really enjoyed it, except i wasnt expecting it to end so suddenly, and it felt a bit unresolved.

After that I tried the little boys route, but i was literally dead within 15 minutes (i skipped over the common route as I had just literally played through it earlier in the day) And whats more the person who kills me warns me that any other choices I had made would have ended the same way (talk about scarring someone off a route)

So i tried another route, guy in the forest.  I had already played enough to figure out who/what he probably was, but somehow i manage not to get killed by the same guy in my room again (really again! this guy didnt try this on the first route i played and now he is trying to ruin another route?!)  Only to wind up zombie food a bit later....

Im not terribly fond of games that Kill you Off just for not guessing right (like which way to turn in a city you have never actually had to navigate befor) as all it really does is lead to save scumming, so when you guess wrong you can just load up and choose differently.  That kind of game play always kills immersion for me, suddenly Im no longer trying to figure out whats going on, but trying to figure out when i really need to save.

I believe there is probably a real gem of a story / mystery to enjoy here.  Alas, it may take a long time, if ever, that im willing to save scum enough to get to the parts that make it worth it.  With all the glowingly positive reviews this game is receiving, I doubt this one will get any attention at all.  Still Ill hope you will consider it when doing your next project.  Death of the MC is certainly a motivator, but it should be reasonably avoidable. Having to choose from random directions where none have ever been even offered before, Having an NPC kill you because you are honest?  These are just cheap shots at the players emotional investment that only rewards those who arnt really invested in the choices they are making anyways, because their saving before all of them.

I might not be a typical VN writer; some referred me as a troll. There are different kind of endings, I tried vary them between routes. The layout of the 4 story lines are quite different, you have probably noticed.

As a developer, I'm slightly amused by your experience. Your second death is just like what the person said on your first death (this wasn't planned, I'm sorry). What the person said was referring to other routes; death is in the corner. The achievement in this bad ending gives a clue on how to get past.

Some choices are obvious, others go by guessing and there are choices where it doesn't matter; just go with what you're curious about. I anticipated players go for replays, so I added a "Skip to" button. In case you didn't save, it immediately skips to the first next choice or unread line.

Since those deaths are high likely to happen, I tried to make the endings appealing with visuals and some commentary. About your definition of "cheap": it took me several days to get the coding right, because there are several possible answer combinations. It's almost like a lottery, but has it's limits. MC's honesty is a confirmation to the reason this person is chasing her. 

I'm a veteran in visual novels and haven't considered those that never played it. Saving is crucial, but for those that forget or don't; I tried adding the tools to make gameplay easier.

Thank you for your honest feedback!

Thank you for sharing your thoughts back with me.  TBH I wasnt expecting you to even see the post, nevermind respond to it.  That means alot in this day.  Honestly what I posted was only in the hopes of giving you (and maybe others who might be working on future projects of their own and happened to read it) some food for thought.  I did not intend to be rude, though i will not deny that there wasnt still a bit of anger left having just come away from that 2nd (seemingly random and pointless) death.

I know that the formula you used in this VN is common practice these days.  Amnesia comes to mind right away of another VN I played that was chock full of guess wrong / die endings.  It was considered by the masses to be excellent.  To me it was dissappointing.  If I need a guide or hours of saving / guessing / replaying the same route over and over again to get to a Not Dead ending, where is the fun in that?  Changling is another VN that i really really enjoy the story line(s) of but always come away unhappy from.  You have to get every interaction with the character who's route your on right or you dont get their best ending, and there are so many choices (normally a plus right?) and there are no indications when you make any given choice if it was the "right" one or not.  So in the end you either need ungodly luck, or a walk through because that game doesnt provide the necessary feed back to let you intuit / get there on your own.

I can honestly tell that you are a great writer, the fact that you do your own coding too well thats just amazing.  If you tell me you also did all the art work I think Ill just cry that I havnt won the lotto yet and cant hire you to work on my dream team! (lol seriously some day if God is willing, but thats for another day)  I know you dont need me, or anyone else to tell you how to do what you do.  I am just hoping some constructive feed back might have been welcome.