Okay review time! I thought the overall concept to be reasonably well done. The dialogue between characters was quite nice. The main issues were around some of the tone and pacing of the mall section in relation to the other parts of the game as the mall has a consistent pace that is different from the rest. I found the art to complement the story and works well with the overall content. I'll give this a 3/5 (OK/average).
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Thanks for your review! Glad the art/dialogue/execution of the concept are alright. I'm not sure which way around the tone/pacing consistency is being addressed. Is the mall section better for its consistency, or is the difference between the other parts too much? Writing is one of my weaker skills and I am grateful for feedback about it!