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Really interesting game! Love the puzzle aspect of it. I included it in part 5 of my WAG Challenge compilation video series, if you'd like to take a look :) https://youtu.be/OTUN_NdAHfU
I play this game a while back, and unfortunately, I did not finish it before I reached the central area. However, I felt I got a good sense of the game despite stopping early.
First off, I will say that I liked the fact that you took advantage of the fact that you are making a game, and thus, user input kind of became part of story itself. Even getting lost on this bizarre rail system is its own narrative. I can dig it, and I can dig the world you set out here.
There is a big but to all this though. I couldn't get through. Despite having a map, for some reason I had trouble orienting myself within the system. This may have been partially by design, but I think the game's design would've been helped by having versions of the map that add X's or some marking indicating directions the player cannot go after discovering them.
But since that is my biggest complaint, I gotta say I overall liked this game :).
I really enjoyed this! Trying to figure out how to get to the destination was great fun and really got me paying attention to everything in the world. All the station announcements made me laugh... Definitely been there before, haha!
First off, nice title. There's a sort of rhythm to it.
The substantial text on each page was, at first, off-putting, but I actually appreciate it. Giving us a good amount of information, then letting us choose based on that. Great! :)
Did you make the train map? It's got a nice, crisp design.
The writing is solid and descriptive, with a nice MC voice. My only complaint would be the game's design, no venture outside the usual Twine format. Some color & font choice could have added a lot , I think. Also, by the time I was asked to constantly change trains, I forgot if there was a true destination I was trying to reach, and only got one reminder. A lot to juggle in this game. That's not a bad thing, just something that could've been streamlined.
Great work! Like this variation of the theme!
(btw, I entered the game Literate to this jam, w/ my partner Haze. Check it out? Feedback is much appreciated!)