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Comments on 'The Cave of Montauk'

A topic by Garry Francis created 61 days ago Views: 59 Replies: 1
Viewing posts 1 to 3
Submitted

I didn't think it was appropriate to post comments on the game's page before submissions close, so here's some testing comments for 'The Cave of Montauk'. I hope MarWin Studios see them in time. Some of this may sound pedantic, but, hey, I'm wearing my tester's hat.

General comments:
Avoid excessive use of exclamation marks.
The burning wooden stick has a trailing full stop, so when you say something like GET STICK, the sentence ends with two full stops.

Outside Cave:
Missing full stop at end of sentence.
"go away!!" should be "Go away!"
HIT TROLL when he's asleep and he chases you back to the lake. When you return, he's still asleep.

Circular Room:
The circular room looks square.
I dropped the burning stick before entering this room the first time and the description said it was too dark to see anything, but the image was as clear as daylight. When I went back and got the burning stick and re-entered the room, the description told me about everything, but the image was dark. When I dropped the burning stick in the room, the description reverted to everything being dark and the image stayed dark, even though the burning stick was in the room. When I got the burning stick, went south, then north, everything righted itself. There's something desperately wrong with your darkness routines.
When the room is lit, "custom made" should be "custom-made", as it's a compound adjective.
X STATUE: "statue made" should be "statue, made"; "However you" should be "However, you"; "spend" should be "spent"; "six sided" should be "six-sided" (also when you X NECKLACE and X PENDANT).
Perhaps allow SOLDIER as a synonym for STATUE.
PUT SWORD: "into the hands" should be "on the hands"; "that both hands" should be "both hands"; "while at the same time the" should be "while, at the same time, the"; "Looking up you" should be "Looking up, you"; "Finally the" should be "Finally, the".
It would be nice if the image was updated when the metal barrier is down.
After you open the barrier, X BARRIER still says it's closed.
When you place anything on the statue's hands, the object disappears. You should still be able to see it, perhaps when you X STATUE and X HANDS, and probably shouldn't be allowed to put any more than one object on its hands.
Also, when it says "nothing further happens", the sentence is missing the trailing full stop.

Cave Alcove (to NW):
X TABLE: "blue coloured" should be "blue-coloured"; "square shaped" should be "square-shaped" (also in X HAMMER and object description).

Cave Alcove (to NE):
X TABLE: "silver coloured" should be "silver-coloured"; "sixsided" should be "six-sided".
In sword's object description, "six sided" should "six-sided".

Cave Alcove (to SE):
X TABLE: "golded coloured" should be "gold-coloured"; "triangle shaped" should be "triangle-shaped".
X DAGGER: "gold coloured" should be "gold-coloured" (also in object description).

Cave Alcove (to SW):
X TABLE: "round shaped" should be "round-shaped" (also in object description).
X SPEAR: "rusty and on its handle it has got a round shape pommel" should be "rusty. Its handle has a round-shaped pommel".

Treasure Room:
Room description is missing trailing full stop.
"such as these" should be "such as this".
Putting a link to the Adventuron website was a nice touch. How did you do that? Was that in your source code or did you modify the compiled html file?

Submitted

Thank you very much for taking the time to go through the game and the detailed feedback you gave. I am not a native English speaker and this feedback was of great value. Much appreciated. I have updated the game and re-uploaded it.

For the link at the end, that is already possible with the current version of Adventuron. You can type in the following to get a hyperlink in your game:
: print "Also interested in making adventures such as this? Click <here<4>>[https://adventuron.io] to go to the website." ;</here<4>

<here<4>It is mentioned in the documentation in section 8.18.10 (https://adventuron.io/docs/tut/)</here<4>

<here<4></here<4>