I belief I got myself locked out of getting lind as a vanguard/date because I triggered the Mia event before finishing hers, since she calls me darling even though at the point where I was in her story makes no sense 

I assume this is the same person with this issue as on discord? 

For anyone else encountering this problem, it wasn't a bug but the wiki was missing the requirement to unlock the marriage system first before you can advance the events of Lind.