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Back in my day, when we played this game, it still had that black and white chess background all over. How I miss those old Creibis days... You could no-hit the hardest boss just by shooting him off-screen, and training them like it was COD zombies was the newest thing on the block. Now you, sonny, getting spoiled by all these choices. It was just your sword and bow back then, you understand? So don't take all this newfangled stuff for granted.

Getting old, aren't I?

Anyways, I'm going to take my pills now.

Please add an interaction when you boop the dealers nose :)

(as you can see, my priorities are perfectly in order)

This game is the perfect example of why the king should be as weak as he is right now.

I mashed liar like a true Sophist fan, got it wrong, then lost the 1/6 chance (again like a true Sophist) and died within 15 seconds of the game starting.

LETS GO GAMBLING *shoots self* 

*POW*

...

LET'S BE FINANCIALLY RESPONSIBLE

wait

I could have sworn I was gonna have to fight the AI to leave lol

If you were wondering, yes, a Royal Flush can solo the hardest difficulty with 30 waves, but I upgraded mine to 7/7/6 instead of the default 3/3/3. Still funny tho

Nerf spamming, I just spammed the two lowest towers and won every level because the DPT (Damage Per unit Time) is too favored towards basic ($30 for 18 DPT (3 dmg x 6 spd)) compared to the heavy ($100 for 24 DPT (8 dmg x 3 spd)) and to some extent the light ($60 for 20 DPT (1dmg x 20 spd)). Even Helen Keller can see and hear the best deal here, and the recharge time of 5 seconds vs. 10 seconds certainly doesn't help (in fact it somehow doubles the problem). Otherwise a very visually pleasing and smooth 40 minute experience. Keep working on it, it's got potential :)

*pyro screams*

This game is incredibly well designed, balanced, and also still simple, which is a big accomplishment for any game designer.  The AI is also incredibly good at actually being sentient and human-like.  This game will become the Catan of TTS board games someday. My only quarrel is WHAT DO YOU MEAN A FULLY ARMORED KNIGHT DIES TO 1 ZOMBIE WHAT THE F---

Totally nothing suspicious here, just some normal Balatro stuff.

my first instinct in this game is to immediately think "hehe minigun go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr"

Thank god the prince only does 1 damage, I would've died otherwise. I way overkilled the king with Punker(lv.3) & Bard(lv.3) & Summon Book(lv.3). It was amazing to watch the king not even make it halfway through the hordes of imps lol. Just waiting for those decks to come out.

Also VIKINGS!!!