I have finally satisfied all the actor's unhinged needs and won (after breaking way too many exquisite Italian items.) Thank you for the hint (as well as the one below about farnxl uvatrf)!
MetaMetaPuzzle
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I said "move to owner's discard pile" as a way to circumvent locked cards without complicated phrasing, because the text is long enough already. This would also use the interaction where locked cards that are moved somewhere other than the play pile remain locked.
If the ribbons were worth 2 instead of 3, then to create a blackjack with 3 ribbons each one could gain 5 value and then reset later. (In addition to being the value of the cards, 5 is also the value of the Akatan / Aotan combo.) I was actually thinking the different types of ribbons could have different functions. Poetry Ribbon could be another all-suits-at-once card, while Blue Ribbon could be spades or nothings and have an additional blackjack effect.
Rain Man (0):
On Play: Choose to add a Poetry Ribbon or a Blue Ribbon to your draw, play, and discard piles, then burn this card.
Ribbon (7):
On Play: If you have two ribbons of the same type already in play, move all other cards in play to owner's discard pile. You and opponent are each forced to stand, and your bust limit is set to 21.