Thank you for sharing your experience. My condolences to your mother and know that she will be well in heaven, watching your progress and your commitment to your personal life.
I hope you can get back on your feet again. Ignoring basic care greatly affects your mental and physical performance. I know you are going through a very difficult time in your life, but to stay well, you need to organize yourself. Writing is good for most people, but if it is not having much effect, it is good to look for new environments or leisure opportunities to get more inspiration and dedicate more time to self-care. As just a follower listening to your words, I only have a part to comment, but I will express my concern. I may not have been very direct because I am not one of the best in the contest, especially in English.
Unfortunately, not everything goes as we want, but we know the effort you are putting into competing in the challenge and I will be here rooting for you to complete it the way you want, prioritizing mainly your health.
However, since you have made the effort to inform us about your situation, know that regardless of the time, we will be supporting you from afar, whether waiting for an update, or hoping that your health is good and that you can improve even more, and always wishing you the best, whether in the changes that have occurred in society or in the way you demonstrate yourself to us.
-Fula from Brazil