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When you buy a rural property for a great price you never expect the convenience store to be so convenient. Every time I want late night noodles my boy Sir always has my back. Tonight he got fired & I am petitioning this store to bring him back. The new employee is rude and inconsiderate, did not sell me juice OR tell me to have a nice night.Also, if someone could check the bushes by the store, they smell like literal dead bodies. Tonight when I got home for the 3rd time I found that I was now just as delicious as those noodles I love.

7/10 - Would juice again

SPOILERS !!!
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This was an excellent experience. I really enjoyed the npc interactions, but HOLY PLEASE TURN DOWN THE CHAIR JUMPSCARES. The amount of times I turned tail and ran the moment I saw a chair blocking my path. I felt a raw, primal fear within me, as I felt its piercing gaze. It was everywhere and nowhere. Please, this game is not for the faint of heart. The portion of the game where you have to turn the valves, MY GOD. The fear of being trapped in the room BY A CHAIR was TOO GREAT. Every time I turned the corner, I prayed to every god, new and old, I knew that no chair would meet me as I rounded the bend. The only respite was my friend Jimmy, he always had my back. I was glad to see the hell pit to escape, I could feel the chairs getting closer.

7/10 - Would cuddle with Jimmy again

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When I inherited this property from my beloved father-in-law I did not expect it to come with the horrors. Plenty o' good land out here but I am not allowed to pet the wildlife, there's a dog that keeps knocking on my door but i never catch him in time :(. Someone keeps playing clown music at ungodly hours of the night (PLEASE LINK ME TO HOA) and i haven't slept in 5 days. My wife's family keeps checking in on me though I'm so happy they keep asking if im still alive. For some reason that damn bird wont leave me alone my sleep deprivation has gotten to the point where its talking. I can't get the tenant in my well to pay rent & the government "doesn't have jurisdiction" in "haunted places" (HIRING MERCENARIES AT $3/HR+tips😊). Been trying to get my wife to move in but all she says is I should "sign the divorce papers" or something, but its okay she'll let me see the kids when i become a rich farmer. Contact me at u/pumpDaddy on reddit for job applications.

10/10 - Would cheat on my wife again

SPOILERS AHEAD
PLEASE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. STOP PUTTING PEOPLE IN MY BASEMENT. They walk around at night and sound like giant New York sewer rats. As a proud retired New Yorkian (45 years, divorced, deported) who fought in the great Italian Immigration Wars of Albany, the sounds of skittering under the floor boards triggers my PTSD. I start peeling my skin off and gnawing at the palms of my hands. Every night I can imagine them in my floor waiting to get a piece of me, I can hear the "Ma ma mias". So please, if you're going to trap people in my basement, just make sure they're not Italian.

7/10 - Would fight for the Big Apple again

Spoilers

Great tour of the home, couldn't get the local hoodlums to leave my dining room or laundry room closet, the rascals. Very spacious master bedroom and kitchen, loved the complementary hair locks on the floor and the ketchup stains. Program crashed, when it booted up again I noticed that the drone must've had a terrible nose bleed across the entire stairwell.Thankfully I could go scan the rooms again to fix the poor guy. The previous homeowner had spectacular taste in art and I was eager to see more of it, which I got on my second visit to the master bedroom. The renovations made it extremely spacious and had plenty of art to view, however I had some trouble finding the exit, thankfully the sound of footsteps and Mr. [AGENT NAME] helped me find my way out. I definitely loved the ground beef room and that's really what helped sell the deal. Also cannot forget to mention the amazing view and the ever-expansive back and front yard.

8/10, would sell my soul to the meat lords again.