thank you, i'm glad you liked it!
ebi-hime
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absolutely love the aesthetics (esp that one cg of galia in the bathroom brushig her teeth, stylised anime art overlaid over photographic bgs always look so nice to me, esp when they get integrated into a scene w/ angles accounted for) and the writing is lovely, i love girls who are also mushrooms and mushrooms who become girls
the scene of the mushroom being plucked was also effectively visceral. loved the imagery with the monitor surrounded by ivy too.
thank you for making this it was a lovely experience! the music is also very pretty!
Finished reading this last night and I have some Thoughts about it haha...
First off, this VN actually took me quite a while to read despite being rather short. Usually I click through VNs very quickly, even ones with the prettiest art and the most high quality of presentations, because I'm impatient and I prioritise reading the story above all else. There was something about the presentation of this VN, though, which really made me slow down and appreciate all of it: 'Narcisse' recording his thoughts to the camera, the segments where he's texting his friends, the inserts with the fanfiction he's been writing and his interactions with Gabriel's fan community, his inner monologue... There's a lot going on here in such a short wordcount, but it all manages to feel cohesive. I liked how 'scattered' the narration is, actually: it fits with how fragmented 'Narcisse's' sense of self becomes, and kind of seems to echo his mental state in a way.
This story is pretty dark, obviously (it actually ended on a much grimmer note than I expected, though I didn't read the content warnings LOL so maybe this was warned for), but I mostly appreciated how funny it was when it wasn't being Really Grim. I think my favourite part of this VN was 'Narcisse's' rant in the fandom community about how people prefer Gabriel over Seiji, it feels so ridiculous but it's perfectly believable that somebody would write something like that... In fact, I'm sure I *have* seen people write things like that in fandom spaces. I love how reasonable 'Narcisse' is trying to sound, all while he's basically calling other people morons for not agreeing with him ("though of course, everybody's entitled to their own opinions " lol).
I also unexpectedly really liked Josh's character. I think it's interesting how 'Narcisse' boils his friends down to tropes when they interact ('The jock', 'the weeb', etc) and he's very dismissive of Josh in his inner monologue as being 'some bicurious guy who's going to use me and then cast me aside', but the reader can see pretty clearly in that one scene of Josh he is a decent guy (he is too good for 'Narcisse' haha). It makes it more apparent 'Narcisse' is a pretty unreliable narrator who isn't really trying to engage with his friends, all the while wallowing in his own self-pity about how nobody understands him. You did a great job showing how his POV is skewed in a subtle way, it's also quite sad to read somebody being so negative towards a person who clearly has his best interests at heart.
It was entertaining in its own way to see 'Narcisse' spiral throughout the story to being The Absolute Worst version of himself, and I did like how deranged his thought processes become (he also has some pretty suitably deranged facial expressions too LOL). The 2nd time he interacts with Gabriel was also pretty funny, even if it was uncomfortable: it was fun seeing 'Narcisse' trying to rationalise that EVERYTHING WOULD HAVE WORKED OUT FINE IF THAT JERK SEIJI WASN'T THERE...
So it's also quite interesting to see, at the very end of the story, that Seiji is actually far more sympathetic about what happened to 'Narcisse' than Gabriel, even though 'Narcisse' was overtly rude to him and Gabriel was the object of his affection. I wonder if this is another dig at 'Narcisse' not being the best judge of character a la Josh, or maybe it's another indication that he was so wrapped up in his own delusions he wasn't perceiving reality clearly (well, the story is full of those at the end).
This is honestly a pretty bizarre story which is told in a myriad of different ways, with some of the most ??? sound effects I've heard in a VN and an incredibly insane MC (also 'Narcisse's' emotions were giving me big Inside Out vibes lol), but I really liked it. I think it manages to come together to form a cohesive whole even if the individual elements seem kind of disparate, and while 'Narcisse' is uh not the best guy I did feel a lot of sympathy for him. Though there are some very funny parts of this story, it is sad to see a character who had potential pushing everybody who cares about him away and wallowing in his own delusions because he's too ashamed? Prideful? Fearful? to open up to others who are actually in a position to help him.
I suppose it's also telling the only person 'Narcisse' wants to 'open up to' is Gabriel, who is an idol and is basically unattainable. He doesn't have to worry about how his beloved will regard him if he and his beloved literally can't interact (for the most part) and it's all one-sided, AI generated photos of you and your beloved kissing can't tell you to go to therapy or get out of bed or eat some food...
(I also think it's interesting Lewis calls himself Narcisse even though he treats himself so terribly, but it's clear he does have quite the ego despite his rapidly deteriorating mental health and that is probably a big reason why he doesn't get outside help...)
In any case, I really enjoyed it. It packs so much into a relatively short wordcount and there's a lot to dwell on. The characters feel complex and multi-faceted, even characters who don't get much screentime like Josh, and I really love how you write terrible men. I hope you write more insane yaoi like this in the future (er, if you want to, of course!), you're very good at digging into the mindsets of mentally ill characters and showing what makes them tick!
Aaa thank you very much! It was very nice of you to check the VN out and to leave such a lovely comment, reading this made my day 🙏
It makes leaving the comments on worthwhile despite some of the unsavoury things people have been saying 💦💦
I get a little overwhelmed with longer comments like this and I'm not sure if I'm the best at replying to them, but I am glad that you liked it even if the story strays into some pretty uncomfortable territory.
About Connor: my proofreader was pretty upset about the scene where Arthur details what happened to Connor, and they found that much more upsetting than Arthur and Mason's relationship. I think they had to take a break from the story at this point, and I think they were a little peeved I didn't give them a content warning for it in advance haha 💦💦
Calling this story wholesome or relaxing feels a bit deceptive given it does deal with a pretty dark topic like this, but it makes up a pretty core part of Arthur's character so I hope it was handled sensitively!
When I was writing this, I decided the conflict with Connor would be the main reason why Arthur is the way he is... Spoilers, but Arthur blames himself for what happened to Connor (even if it was not directly his fault) and he's been internally considering himself as a Bad Person for years already, which has eroded a lot of his self-worth. I imagine he was a lot more 'together' when he was still working with a teacher, and also pretty principled. I don't think he would ever have considered having a relationship with a student while on the job: he would have found the idea repellent. After the Connor incident his mental health collapses and his self image falls apart, hence he's more receptive to Mason's advances than he would have been in the past because "well I already hate myself, it can't get much worse". The fact Mason is an adult is a pretty important factor too: if he was younger I still don't think Arthur would have gone along with this.
I did want Arthur and Mason's relationship to be (mostly) wholesome despite the taboo elements, and I didn't want the story to feel like Arthur is taking advantage, so making Arthur emotionally vulnerable and Damaged felt important. He's really going through it, even if he's mostly able to mask it, which means I can write some fun hurt/comfort and it kind of undercuts some of the authority Arthur might still have over Mason by being his former teacher and being a fair bit older than him. Having a five year gap between the pair's last interaction and making a point out of the fact Arthur initially doesn't even remember Mason when they see one another again also makes the relationship feel a lil less creepy I think haha
I wanted to have a bit of fun with the character dynamic though, so the teacher/student thing does crop up in a kink context... A lot of it is Mason trying to get under Arthur's skin by being as audacious as possible, partially because he's a little salty Arthur obviously wasn't paying him any especial attention back in school, but largely because he thinks it's fun to fluster his former teacher... Also he is very clearly getting off on it lol he's kind of a bully...But yes most of the times when Mason calls Arthur 'sir' he's being annoying on purpose because he knows it flusters Arthur. Arthur isn't super into it (or so he says) but he still winds up going along with it in part, so I think he appreciates the attention haha
If Arthur was less damaged he probably wouldn't let Mason take so many liberties, but he's been dealing with self-hatred for three years and part of him probably just wants somebody to be nice to him (or at least to take an interest in him), so things pan out as they do... Even if Arthur doesn't believe Mason will stick around, so he's surprised when he was being serious about his confession haha
I've read a few other VNs which do the teacher/student romance thing (it's cropped up in some yuri VNs like Lilycle Rainbow Stage, Kindred Spirits, and Sono Hanabira, to name a few), and they all handle the relationship by making the younger character more pushy and the teacher the shy uwu one so it doesn't feel as discomforting. Also, in the case of Kindred Spirits, the character designer decided to give the teacher pigtails and make her look younger than literally every other member of the cast, I guess to make her seem extra non-threatening lol
This is a common trope in this sort of story (not just in BL) to the extent where it feels like a cliche, so I was kind of rolling my eyes at myself for relying on the same story beat (hence why I said I was being 'cheap' in my author's notes lol), but it does work pretty effectively. I hope this story did touch at least a little on the ethics of the situation and Arthur feels a suitable degree of unease about it as opposed to handwaving any uncomfortable elements of the relationship completely, though.
And thank you for sharing the song, the lyrics are pretty tragic. It does feel quite fitting for the end of the story (or, at least, the part of the story before the credits). I had to give these boys a happy ending since I felt like Arthur had suffered enough already...
That being said, I did decide to make a sequel where I will inflict Arthur with even more guilt about his illict relationship and some fun new anxieties about what the general public will think of him, so he's not getting off the hook that easy. I am not done with him yet.....
Thank you once again for the king comment, it's appreciated! And yeah this story has a pretty different tone from your teacher/student romance haha but I'm glad you wanted to root for them... I want to root for them too I think they're cute 🙏
This VN does have some spicy content but there's no explicit artwork, so I'm not sure if I'd class this as erotica personally. I wouldn't even call this r18: I think it's more like nc-17.
Steam is pretty strict about tagging games with adult content appropriately and I wasn't asked to tag this as AO on Steam at least, so I didn't tag it as AO on Itchio either. I do have other BL VNs which are more explicit than this though 🙏
All Scars and Starlight does but the context is kind of grim (also you need to buy the DLC to get that).
Unluckily in Love: Fragments of Love has some switching but only in episode five.
Beneath the Bleeding Moon does too, but only in a bonus r18 scene that's disconnected from the main story.
It's not something I write a lot but it crops up on occasions!
Like I said, the story is meant to be a little scandalous. The story is told from Arthur's POV and he had a lot of guilt and neuroses about getting so close to a former student which makes up the emotional core of the story. The age gap being as substantial as it is was a deliberate writing decision, and I would like to think I handled the subject with a degree of nuance and tact. Of course, you are free to disagree 🙏
Thank you very much! I'm glad you enjoyed it! <3
I spent more time here trying to flesh out the side characters than I did BH. The side characters there are pretty one note and they mostly exist for comedic purposes, and while the same can be said here, I wanted to give them some more screentime and show off some sides to them to make the universe feel more alive.
And I'm very fond of Constance, she's one of my favourite characters I've written so I wanted to give her some more screentime. Thank you once again!
ah this is such a kind comment thank you very much, i'm glad that the story spoke to you!
i generally prefer to write longer stories since it's more satisfying for me to put them together and i like spending more time with my characters, but writing shorter stories can be fun too! i think i need to challenge myself to write more succinctly, so i should probably try to make some more stories like this more often.
thank you for checking out my works! i hope that they're enjoyable! 🙏
honestly i'm glad this is an o2a2 vn and the wordcount is so short b/c i don't think i could spend much more time listening to this guy lol
i find this looksmaxxing stuff pretty unpalatable and you did a good job capturing the lingo: so much so this was unpleasant to read. it feels accurate (even if it is over the top), and i think you did a good job making max seem like a real person instead of a stereotype, even if this is pretty overblown.
honestly something abt this makes me feel kind of sad. you can interrogate max abt his beliefs and point out he's being misogynistic but what does it matter? it doesn't change his viewpoint, he just mocks you for being a beta cuck loser. words aren't going to get through to a person this steeped in harmful ideology, and trying to talk these people around only makes you a subject of ridicule. does that mean it's better, then, to not try to talk to these people, because most of them aren't going to engage with you in good faith?
tl;dr this feels like the louis theroux manosphere documentary distilled into a 5 minute experience, it's not a pleasant read but that's probably the point.
love the art and the chara designs, especially adelaide's, and i really like the ui. it has a nice retro vibe which is very aesthetically pleasing. the whole story felt pretty cosy to me, even the more toxic elements, and i think emma and aiyana's relationship feels fairly wholesome despite Everything. it was a nice read ty for making it!










































































