Indie game storeFree gamesFun gamesHorror games
Game developmentAssetsComics
SalesBundles
Jobs
Tags
(+1)

Congrats on finishing! I had a few thoughts while reading:

  • Your intro, presentation, and layout... dang it's good. I immediately knew what I was getting into and was super down!
  • The use of stock art was highly effective in a way I did not expect. Well done.
  • The villain / scenario generator... nice! Felt very cinematic.
  • The Steven Redhead quote (and actually all the quotes) set the tone exceptionally well.
  • The description of the dice pool was not clear. Like I know what you were trying to tell the reader but it took me too long to figure it out.
  • I wasn't clear how the skills and attributes fit into the rolls (I may have missed something with the Character Creation section which was nice).
  • The Getting Pummled section is great! As well as the Calling for the Hero.

All in all man, I think you have the beginnings of something really strong here! Great job!

(1 edit) (+2)

Thanks for taking the time to do detailed feedback on this and so many entries.  (And thanks for the really positive comment!)

I think you're right on the description clarity points and I would have benefited from a round of editing / proofreading before submitting for sure but fatigue won that round. 

(+1)

You are most certainly welcome! I can tell everyone worked so hard on their entries and am trying to give each the attention they deserve. Nothing is worse than putting in a lot of time, energy, and passion into a project and not getting any feedback.

It's funny cause I feel like we all could have used like another day just to proof haha. I think for the next one of these I'm going to reserve some time at the end to REALLY proof and only proof. Instead of trying to cram things in right a zero hour.